The ability of the Dominants to smell a Sub

[artslut86]

I'm beginning to suspect that Dommes, and Doms all have some magical ability to sniff out, to know, to test based on a few sentences or comments who they truly want in their virtual or real harem of submissives.
Big D's is this true, do you have sub-radar?

 

[IrisAlthea]

Sub-dars and dom-dars are mostly a mixture of intuition and wishful thinking.
What you are seeing is probably more about people looking for compatibility and having a set of things they look for and a set of red flags that make them pass.

Some of that takes time to look for but others can come up very early in a conversation.

 

[lanceGibs]

Sub-dars and dom-dars are mostly a mixture of intuition and wishful thinking.
What you are seeing is probably more about people looking for compatibility and having a set of things they look for and a set of red flags that make them pass.

Some of that takes time to look for but others can come up very early in a conversation.

While the smell and look part may appear romantic,I am with your "Spot in a conversation ability"

 

[Lady2020]

I'm assuming fake D's aren't included.

 

[IrisAlthea]

I'm assuming fake D's aren't included.

I don’t think it is limited to D/s at all and if you are refering to the HNG’s looking for cyber, I think they are very clear about what they want usually.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

HNGs?

Agree, conversation is the way to go. Apart from anything else, most people switch way more than Lit stories would have you believe.

 

[lanceGibs]

HNGs?

Agree, conversation is the way to go. Apart from anything else, most people switch way more than Lit stories would have you believe.

Can you please elaborate

 

[Kumquatqueen]

Can you please elaborate

The chances of someone being 'a domme' or 'a sub' all the time are pretty low, certainly outside fantasy. Fiction likes to keep it simple, but in reality people often feel dominant to some people, submissive to others. Or choose to be dominant or submissive to the same person depending on what mood they're in.

To be fair, there's plenty of people only interested in the submissive fantasy, because it's much more relaxing, but I'm yet to meet anyone who actually wants to be dominant all the time because it's hard work being responsible for another person - outside the twats you find who mistake being dominant for being a selfish arse. Not saying it never happens, just it isn't the default that stories suggest it is.

 

[IrisAlthea]

HNGs?

HornyNetGeeks

 

[lanceGibs]

The chances of someone being 'a domme' or 'a sub' all the time are pretty low, certainly outside fantasy. Fiction likes to keep it simple, but in reality people often feel dominant to some people, submissive to others. Or choose to be dominant or submissive to the same person depending on what mood they're in.

To be fair, there's plenty of people only interested in the submissive fantasy, because it's much more relaxing, but I'm yet to meet anyone who actually wants to be dominant all the time because it's hard work being responsible for another person - outside the twats you find who mistake being dominant for being a selfish arse. Not saying it never happens, just it isn't the default that stories suggest it is.

After a long time on the forum and with people with the same persuasion I find a girl speaking the truth.
You are hundred percent right .
That is how the world works.
Your honesty and intellect appreciated

 

[Kumquatqueen]

After a long time on the forum and with people with the same persuasion I find a girl speaking the truth.
You are hundred percent right .
That is how the world works.
Your honesty and intellect appreciated

Flattery is always appreciated! You may enjoy some of my stories.

 

[lanceGibs]

Flattery is always appreciated! You may enjoy some of my stories.

A statement of fact is different from flattery

 

[artslut86]

I'm reading some now. Excellent stuff. - Now that was flattery!

 

[SomaSlave]

I'm reading some now. Excellent stuff. - Now that was flattery!

Not flattery: another statement of fact.

 

[artslut86]

Not flattery: another statement of fact.

roger that mate

 

[slavemelanie]

The chances of someone being 'a domme' or 'a sub' all the time are pretty low, certainly outside fantasy. Fiction likes to keep it simple, but in reality people often feel dominant to some people, submissive to others. Or choose to be dominant or submissive to the same person depending on what mood they're in.

To be fair, there's plenty of people only interested in the submissive fantasy, because it's much more relaxing, but I'm yet to meet anyone who actually wants to be dominant all the time because it's hard work being responsible for another person - outside the twats you find who mistake being dominant for being a selfish arse. Not saying it never happens, just it isn't the default that stories suggest it is.

Such a well written and thoughtful post. It is exhausting at times being Dominant or submissive. For any D/s relationship to work long term it has to be a well rounded agreement. If you're expecting or wanting the arrangement to be high intensity for the majority of the time that relationship is doomed from the start.

D/s relationships are like any other relationship in that the ones that work and last span a wide range of sharing of life's highs and lows. You need to be able to laugh, dream, cry and try to solve lifes problems together. Remembering you're "partners" in the relationship is important, its just partners with very different and defined roles.

For what works for Master and I ...is always aware of Oour individual roles but also allowing for lighter moments where the D/s element isn't so intense.

Just a few of my thoughts, melanie

 

[stoneroller1955]

Such a well written and thoughtful post. It is exhausting at times being Dominant or submissive. For any D/s relationship to work long term it has to be a well rounded agreement. If you're expecting or wanting the arrangement to be high intensity for the majority of the time that relationship is doomed from the start.

D/s relationships are like any other relationship in that the ones that work and last span a wide range of sharing of life's highs and lows. You need to be able to laugh, dream, cry and try to solve lifes problems together. Remembering you're "partners" in the relationship is important, its just partners with very different and defined roles.

For what works for Master and I ...is always aware of Oour individual roles but also allowing for lighter moments where the D/s element isn't so intense.

Just a few of my thoughts, melanie

I totally agree melanie. I love that our times together can span a number of emotions and feelings. From intense D/s moments to intimate exchanges to laughing our asses off at the silliness of life. All in the first hour. I am a very fortunate Man. Thank you for being you.

 

[AliTrishFL]

I’ve often wondered if I am sub or not…never quite know those lines

 

[slavemelanie]

I totally agree melanie. I love that our times together can span a number of emotions and feelings. From intense D/s moments to intimate exchanges to laughing our asses off at the silliness of life. All in the first hour. I am a very fortunate Man. Thank you for being you.

There is not a more perfect Man to walk hand in hand along this journey Sir. You have made all the effort to find You well worth it.

 

[artslut86]

I totally agree melanie. I love that our times together can span a number of emotions and feelings. From intense D/s moments to intimate exchanges to laughing our asses off at the silliness of life. All in the first hour. I am a very fortunate Man. Thank you for being you.

I'm curious is that physical r.ship or online only?
I was told by a domme she wouldn't share anything about herself with a strange man who gets naked online for her lol. YMMV . Sounds like you two have a cool gig. Congrats.

 

[stoneroller1955]

I'm curious is that physical r.ship or online only?
I was told by a domme she wouldn't share anything about herself with a strange man who gets naked online for her lol. YMMV . Sounds like you two have a cool gig. Congrats.

Thank you art. melanie and I are enjoying ourselves greatly in as many ways as possible. As often as possible.

 

[Will527]

At one time, kumquatqueen correctly stated that most men's idea of female domination is just an idea of a woman giving them what they want and pretending it is the domme's idea. A true domme may recognize a true sub but I think she can also weed out the "wannabes" easily. Perhaps a better way for us to be used as we wish is through a Female Led Relationship. Both win. Just my opinion.

 

[artslut86]

At one time, kumquatqueen correctly stated that most men's idea of female domination is just an idea of a woman giving them what they want and pretending it is the domme's idea. A true domme may recognize a true sub but I think she can also weed out the "wannabes" easily. Perhaps a better way for us to be used as we wish is through a Female Led Relationship. Both win. Just my opinion.

Good point. I think the place where I came from was this is different I'd like to explore. I met a Domme who just thought it was fun to see men who could freely masturbate, turn themselves over to being edged. There was a lot more to it, but that was a dynamic that as a r.ship between D & s continued it deepened into more than self masturbation by directed command.
Its a funky place.
How would you categorize an FLR ? that would seem to me to be more for In Real Life perhaps?

 

[Will527]

From what I have read, it's predominantly arranged for the wife's pleasure, i.e. husband does housework, gives her frequtnt oral orgasms as she needs, denies himself until she is ready for intercourse. Mutual respect, but she rules and he serves.

 

[SilverVeil]

I always laugh (usually to myself) when a sub waxes rhapsodic about how well the D understands her, “gets” her, etc.

All it takes is a minor talent for listening because most subs will fill the silence by spilling every bean they’ve got.

Hey! I resemble this comment! I spill the beans on myself often. I think in my case I've never had someone who treated me like what I said or thought was important. I never felt listened to. I never felt like I mattered. So yes, if a Dom paid attention to my ramblings, He could probably have a gold mine of information unknowingly given by myself.