The misuse of the term Milf

[Kimlikes]

Its been discussed often here how the word-and category-Taboo has changed over the years, at least in terms of porn and erotica. Taboo's basic meaning is something society would normally frown upon, but now all but exclusively is associated with incest or step incest.

Last night I was discussing my new WIP-a milf anthology-with a friend, and he brought up a good point, why are Milfs in erotica and porn always older women? The term stands for mother I'd like to fuck, there are a lot of young moms out there.

His point made me think of the couple that recently bought the house across the street from us. The wife is a flat out stunning redhead who is 26(I know this because my chatty wife went over there to bring them food the day they moved in and she somehow always ends up with everyone's life story) and a mother of 3 year old twins.

But if I were to post a picture of her somewhere and say look at this hot Milf I would get comments that she's too young.

The correct term for a very attractive and sexually aggressive woman-especially one that likes younger men is cougar. A cougar is always an older woman in at least her upper thirties and upwards.

But yet look up Milf in erotic stories and porn searches and they are always in that late 30's and up range...porn stars like India Summers, Jodie West, Zoe Holloway Kendra Lust etc, they're not younger women.

In another thread discussing the popularity of the mature category it was mentioned that the category itself has become a bit of a misnomer, its not about older mature pairings, but age gap stories and the word milf is in constant referral to 40ish women.

If you want to get eyes on your story here, or get the right target audience for sale, your Milfs have to be older or it does not go over as well so authors perpetuate the misuse because you either keep going with it or the story won't be as successful.

One last point is I have read-and written-stories where the "milf" does not even have kids, but the term is used as a synonym for cougar, and no one calls that out because...back to my point about Taboo, the word's meaning has totally shifted, and even though mom is in the acronym its no longer the focal point, the age is.

Additionally, here's a quick hit on the selling market. Milf is the better term in a title because if you use cougar(even more so if Cougar cub is in title or description) on amazon,...well, some young boy or girl searches cougar expecting animals and gets cougar cub erotica because amazon refuses to have a separate adult section, but when mom or dad get pissed and report the book, its always the authors fault...so selling advice, always use Milf, at least on amazon with its heavy Karen population.

And...this is what I think to talk about at 6:30 in the morning

Milf- Mother I’d like to Fuck

 

[SimonDoom]

Last night I was discussing my new WIP-a milf anthology-with a friend, and he brought up a good point, why are Milfs in erotica and porn always older women? The term stands for mother I'd like to fuck, there are a lot of young moms out there.

I was thinking about this question, and I think the answer is that "MILF" suggests more than just mother. Its use generally suggests a relationship between the woman being called a MILF and the person using the term MILF, which is typically a young man. It's where the whole zing or zest comes from. I'm thinking about the movie American Pie, or the video of Stacy's Mom Has Got It Going On.

I'm middle-aged. I know a 30-year-old woman can be a mother, but I can't think of her as a MILF, EXCEPT in the context of a story that involves a younger man, in which case I can project myself into his character and THEN think of her as a MILF. An actress I think of as MILFy and sexy is Marisa Tomei, but she's actually never been a mother. So it's all about the fantasy.

 

[Kimlikes]

Or it could be Mature I’d Like to Fuck lol

 

[Lifestyle66]

It could be that the term "MILF" is seen as an older (late 30's/40's) woman because she's "motherly" as appearing old enough to be a young guy's mother. A 20-something year old woman, even with a baby, wouldn't be seen as a MILF by any boy older than 10.

So, using the term MILF would be relative to the age of the guy's discussing the woman. And a cougar would be more appropriate when discussed by a guy who is only 10-15 years younger than the woman (not old enough to be his mother.)

 

[SimonDoom]

It could be that the term "MILF" is seen as an older (late 30's/40's) woman because she's "motherly" as appearing old enough to be a young guy's mother. A 20-something year old woman, even with a baby, wouldn't be seen as a MILF by any boy older than 10.

I think this is right. If you think about it, males are likely to start thinking about the term "MILF" or thinking about women in this way when they are in their teens, and the women they think of this way are likely to be the moms of their friends. So they're likely to be at least in their mid to late 30s, and since people have children at older ages now than in the past perhaps 40s or early 50s.

 

[TheRedChamber]

I think this is right. If you think about it, males are likely to start thinking about the term "MILF" or thinking about women in this way when they are in their teens, and the women they think of this way are likely to be the moms of their friends. So they're likely to be at least in their mid to late 30s, and since people have children at older ages now than in the past perhaps 40s or early 50s.

I've always thought of it as a requirement that the MILF is a mother of a friend. There's both the total relationship destroying act of sleeping with your friends mum and the peer group kudos that comes with it. She needs to be someone in an authoritative and nurturing role who still sees you as a kid (until she suddenly doesn't). If she's also your mother's best friend all the better.

 

[SimonDoom]

I've always thought of it as a requirement that the MILF is a mother of a friend. There's both the total relationship destroying act of sleeping with your friends mum and the peer group kudos that comes with it. She needs to be someone in an authoritative and nurturing role who still sees you as a kid (until she suddenly doesn't). If she's also your mother's best friend all the better.

I agree that's part of it. It's much more than just being a "mom" or just being "mature." It's a combination of things. A story about a 25-year old woman who has a kid is not a MILF story. A story about a 50-year-old woman who has a kid and has a relationship with a 50 year old man is not a MILF story. The whole "MILF" concept as popularly understood doesn't come into play in either of those scenarios.

 

[HordHolm]

When my wife gave birth (in her mid-30s) I referred to her as my MILF and she (not a native English speaker) was ignorant of the term, looked it up, and threw several well-aimed insults in my direction. I tried to made the point that a 20 year old could quite reasonably be a MILF but it cut no ice.

Of course, over time the meanings of most things in English change - just think of the adjectives; terrific, fantastic, wonderful, awesome (yuk), etc. Do we really think of things being full of terror, fantasy, wonder or awe when we use these?

 

[Kumquatqueen]

There's two reqs to being a MILF - motherly in some way, either the sort of mum you fancied when you were growing up, or the sort who has a body that's blatantly given birth or an age where they likely have, but secondly a person young enough to be their child wants them anyway.

Something about a body becoming a classic rather than old - or still dressing to be attractive rather than not giving a toss.

I recall buying a bunch of clothes from an online store for women with big tits (they start from a D cup but on a small frame that's really not very big). They seemed to include a bunch of wrap-round tops with a deep V neck.

I needed an interview outfit. Tried them on for MrKQ and a couple friends. Verdict for a couple was "Very MILFy." Which was clarified as "keep the outfit but probably best not wearing it for the interview..."

Though actually I've probably been called a MILF more often by guys nearly old enough to be my dad (say 65-70 to my 50). I guess it's acknowledgement that I don't have a fit young body any more, but I've still got that gleam in my eye...

 

[Midsmale69]

UK based here...MILF to me encompasses a range of attractive females ranging from around 30-50yrs or age....may also refer to the younger section as Yummy Mummies... I had a very hot affair with a woman who epitomised MILF/YM to me...she was 40, two primary aged children, married and bored. Had moved on from dealing with babies and toddlers to having more free time, worked out, shopped, and had a part time job. She was in great shape, dressed very smartly and sexily, and had a new found sex drive and adventurous streak. Her new circle of friends were of a.similar mindset and they all had naughty secrets and covered for each other - including a weekend away shopping where each of the 4 had a night with a lover or picked one up! She was stylish, confident and incredibly horny...pure MILF - she would be around 55 now and I'd imagine she is 100% Cougar!!View attachment 2195935

 

[Older_Pervert]

Its been discussed often here how the word-and category-Taboo has changed over the years, at least in terms of porn and erotica. Taboo's basic meaning is something society would normally frown upon, but now all but exclusively is associated with incest or step incest.

Last night I was discussing my new WIP-a milf anthology-with a friend, and he brought up a good point, why are Milfs in erotica and porn always older women? The term stands for mother I'd like to fuck, there are a lot of young moms out there.

His point made me think of the couple that recently bought the house across the street from us. The wife is a flat out stunning redhead who is 26(I know this because my chatty wife went over there to bring them food the day they moved in and she somehow always ends up with everyone's life story) and a mother of 3 year old twins.

But if I were to post a picture of her somewhere and say look at this hot Milf I would get comments that she's too young.

The correct term for a very attractive and sexually aggressive woman-especially one that likes younger men is cougar. A cougar is always an older woman in at least her upper thirties and upwards.

But yet look up Milf in erotic stories and porn searches and they are always in that late 30's and up range...porn stars like India Summers, Jodie West, Zoe Holloway Kendra Lust etc, they're not younger women.

In another thread discussing the popularity of the mature category it was mentioned that the category itself has become a bit of a misnomer, its not about older mature pairings, but age gap stories and the word milf is in constant referral to 40ish women.

If you want to get eyes on your story here, or get the right target audience for sale, your Milfs have to be older or it does not go over as well so authors perpetuate the misuse because you either keep going with it or the story won't be as successful.

One last point is I have read-and written-stories where the "milf" does not even have kids, but the term is used as a synonym for cougar, and no one calls that out because...back to my point about Taboo, the word's meaning has totally shifted, and even though mom is in the acronym its no longer the focal point, the age is.

Additionally, here's a quick hit on the selling market. Milf is the better term in a title because if you use cougar(even more so if Cougar cub is in title or description) on amazon,...well, some young boy or girl searches cougar expecting animals and gets cougar cub erotica because amazon refuses to have a separate adult section, but when mom or dad get pissed and report the book, its always the authors fault...so selling advice, always use Milf, at least on amazon with its heavy Karen population.

And...this is what I think to talk about at 6:30 in the morning

I believe the term MILF originates in the English public/boarding school system. After parents visiting days, the boys would compile lists (wanking lists) of the various mothers and which were the most fuckable - though, of course, most of them would never have done anything other than fuck their own hand……

 

[BobbyBrandt]

As an older perv, my definition of a MILF is a woman of child-bearing age who is someone that I would consider a carnal relationship with under the right circumstances (Neither of us were married, etc.)

She would most definitely be younger than me in order to be of child-bearing age, so the requirement posed by many that she would be an "older" woman is out the window in my definition.

Age does certainly alter one's perspectives. For example, I was considered a DILF by some of my daughters friends when she was in college.

 

[lovecraft68]

As an older perv, my definition of a MILF is a woman of child-bearing age who is someone that I would consider a carnal relationship with under the right circumstances (Neither of us were married, etc.)

She would most definitely be younger than me in order to be of child-bearing age, so the requirement posed by many that she would be an "older" woman is out the window in my definition.

Age does certainly alter one's perspectives. For example, I was considered a DILF by some of my daughters friends when she was in college.

I think the fact the term really became popular due to its use in American Pie by a young man looking at older women is why its locked into women over thirty five.

Cougar is a sexy older woman so age means something, but Milf...well there's women who are early twenties who are moms.

Ever notice how with guys we look at older women when we're young, then as we get to that age it starts to be more an interest in the younger girls. We go from mommy issues to looking for girl's with daddy issues.

I was once blatantly hit on by one of my daughter's friends and by blatantly I mean she took off her bikini top in front of me while I was in the house and my daughter and other friends were outside by the pool. Asked me if I wanted her to be my favorite bad girl.

These things never happen when you're single.

 

[Duleigh]

I'm not sure why this is even being discussed, other than the fact that we like to discuss women that we'd love to fuck. The terms MILF and Cougar don't have to be mutually exclusive. Nor is MILF/Kitten, nor for that matter is MILF/GILF. With the birth of one special little girl, my MILF became a GILF but that doesn't mean she's still not a mom. Kitten, Cougar, GILF, even GGILF or Sugar Momma, they're all subsets of MILF

So if a woman is not a MILF, a mother, what is she? Classically she would be a virgin. Until the 15th century Virgin did not mean chaste, a woman who had never had sex, Virgin for a millennia and a half or longer meant an independent woman, unencumbered by a child or a husband. So if anything we should be looking for a replacement for that term which has evolved.

As for felines, I stumbled across this handy chart somewhere on the web

Kitten - Woman in her teens and twenties
Puma - Woman in her thirties
Cougar - Woman in her forties
Jaguar - Woman in her fifties
Sabretooth - Woman in her sixties and beyond

 

[lovecraft68]

I'm not sure why this is even being discussed, other than the fact that we like to discuss women that we'd love to fuck. The terms MILF and Cougar don't have to be mutually exclusive. Nor is MILF/Kitten, nor for that matter is MILF/GILF. With the birth of one special little girl, my MILF became a GILF but that doesn't mean she's still not a mom. Kitten, Cougar, GILF, even GGILF or Sugar Momma, they're all subsets of MILF

So if a woman is not a MILF, a mother, what is she? Classically she would be a virgin. Until the 15th century Virgin did not mean chaste, a woman who had never had sex, Virgin for a millennia and a half or longer meant an independent woman, unencumbered by a child or a husband. So if anything we should be looking for a replacement for that term which has evolved.

As for felines, I stumbled across this handy chart somewhere on the web

Kitten - Woman in her teens and twenties
Puma - Woman in her thirties
Cougar - Woman in her forties
Jaguar - Woman in her fifties
Sabretooth - Woman in her sixties and beyond

A lot of porn is about niches and niches require classification and "boxes" things have to fit into (No, not those boxes you perverts!). in order to have the desired effect