e...

[kinked_a_bit]

e...

 

[Islander55]

I've never liked hearing things like...

- You can't help who you love.
- I don't have a submissive/dominant bone in my body.
- I don't know why I like ______. I just do.
- You can't control what turns you on.
- I was born this way.

You get the drift.

It's bullshit. All of it. Yes, we are influenced, but not only do we choose how to react to the influences, we also have a lot of control over which potential influences we will indulge and which we will ignore.

Most variations of "I can't help it" are really just attempts to dodge responsibility for having made a choice. Why not say, "This is what I want," instead?

And really, isn't a maker of choices more appealing than someone who claims to have no control over what they do, and how they feel or think?

I agree. We need to understand what we like and want and take responsibility for our own decisions. If you like something different, perhaps something kinky or being submissive, then own it and work toward enjoying it. Of course there may be some desires that should not be fulfilled but understand that as well.

 

[oneblueye]

I agree. We need to understand what we like and want and take responsibility for our own decisions. If you like something different, perhaps something kinky or being submissive, then own it and work toward enjoying it. Of course there may be some desires that should not be fulfilled but understand that as well.

signs of a great deal of intelligence here... hmmm lets watch and see how this plays out

 

[Islander55]

signs of a great deal of intelligence here... hmmm lets watch and see how this plays out

This could be an interesting topic and applies to a lot more than sex.

 

[XOHugz]

I've never liked hearing things like...

- You can't help who you love.
- I don't have a submissive/dominant bone in my body.
- I don't know why I like ______. I just do.
- You can't control what turns you on.
- I was born this way.

You get the drift.

It's bullshit. All of it. Yes, we are influenced, but not only do we choose how to react to the influences, we also have a lot of control over which potential influences we will indulge and which we will ignore.

Most variations of "I can't help it" are really just attempts to dodge responsibility for having made a choice. Why not say, "This is what I want," instead?

And really, isn't a maker of choices more appealing than someone who claims to have no control over what they do, and how they feel or think?

Hindsight is 20/20 and there are things that people do in the moment seeking instant gratification that one the high is done they are like "what did I do." So yeah they look to escape it or be in denial when something isn't quite excepted.