Male writer needs help with a sex scene from female POV

[8letters]

I'm about to finish a story that has a female narrator Mary. I'm to the final sex scene. Mary is going to have a threesome with Lizzy and Matthew. The three of them are in the bedroom. What' I'm planning is for Mary to lie down in the center of the bed and for Lizzy to give her cunninglingus while lying on her stomach between Mary's legs on the lower part of the bed. Matthew will get a vibrator, and, at some point before Mary cums, Lizzy will switch to using it. She'll move to lying next to Mary when she does. I want the Lizzy-Mary portion of the sex scene to be at least 500 words. After Mary orgasms, Matthew fucks her in missionary position while Lizzy lies on the bed next to them. I'd like that part to be at least 500 words. It would be a big help if you could refer me to stories with similar sex scenes told from the female POV so I have a better idea of what to write.

 

[SimonDoom]

My two cents. It will be less helpful to you to look at other people's stories than it will to focus on Mary and what the scene means to her. Is it her first threesome? Is it her first time with a woman? What got her to this point? Is the scene the climax of the story, and, if so, what purpose does it serve, apart from just being sex?

You are experienced at story construction, and you are very particular about how you like things to be done, and you are unusual in that what you write does not necessarily track what you like to read, so I'm doubtful that reading other people's stories will help you. I think your time would be better spent thinking about Mary as a person, making her real, and thinking about the importance of this scene to her.

Focus on your character. You've done this enough that the sexy stuff will just fall into place.

 

[TxRad]

And my two cents. Don't try and set a limit on parts of a sex scene. You either end up rushing or getting wordy.

 

[SimonDoom]

And my two cents. Don't try and set a limit on parts of a sex scene. You either end up rushing or getting wordy.

I agree with this, and I think it's a mistake to have an idea ahead of time about how many words you want a sex scene to take up. Focus instead on what you want to happen with the characters. The word count will fall where it will. If you focus on the characters, and what the sex scene means to them, everything else will fall in place.

 

[Kumquatqueen]

From your description - who is lying on her stomach? Mary or Lizzy? What is Mary's opinion of being watched by Matt? Has she had sex with Lizzy before? Or with any woman before What is she thinking about it? How will she react afterwards? How will this affect her relationship with Mathew? What was that like before?

I could send you a draft of a story where a woman has her first threesome and then has an evening with a woman and then sex with one of the men again, but while your feedback might help me, I'm not sure it would help you, apart from firming up ideas about why you are doing certain bits your way.

 

[8letters]

My two cents. It will be less helpful to you to look at other people's stories than it will to focus on Mary and what the scene means to her. Is it her first threesome? Is it her first time with a woman? What got her to this point? Is the scene the climax of the story, and, if so, what purpose does it serve, apart from just being sex?

You are experienced at story construction, and you are very particular about how you like things to be done, and you are unusual in that what you write does not necessarily track what you like to read, so I'm doubtful that reading other people's stories will help you. I think your time would be better spent thinking about Mary as a person, making her real, and thinking about the importance of this scene to her.

Focus on your character. You've done this enough that the sexy stuff will just fall into place.

I'm very comfortable with how I've set up the sex scene. It's Mary's first threesome. I've spent 22K words getting Mary to this point. The scene is the climax of the story. I'm confident that I can write the dialog during the sex scene well and draw the story to a successful conclusion. What I'm not comfortable with is writing a sex scene from a female point of view. I have no idea of how Mary would feel during each part of the sex scene, but particularly during the part with Lizzy. I don't think I've read a story where a girl uses a vibrator on a girl to make her orgasm. As I read almost exclusively I/T, and I/T authors are overwhelming male, I can't remember reading a detailed sex scene from the female POV that I thought was written by a woman.

I agree with this, and I think it's a mistake to have an idea ahead of time about how many words you want a sex scene to take up. Focus instead on what you want to happen with the characters. The word count will fall where it will. If you focus on the characters, and what the sex scene means to them, everything else will fall in place.

I'd say that one of my strengths as an erotic writer is that I write long, detailed, creative sex scenes. I could write, "Lizzy's tongue felt so good, and I quickly came," but I feel that'd be very unsatisfying to my readers. I've taken them on a 22K word journey, and the final sex scene should be long enough for them to feel that taking the trip was worthwhile. The word count will fall where it will, but by giving a word count I feel I'm specifying the kind of sex scene in a story that I'm looking for as a possible inspiration.

 

[8letters]

From your description - who is lying on her stomach? Mary or Lizzy? What is Mary's opinion of being watched by Matt? Has she had sex with Lizzy before? Or with any woman before What is she thinking about it? How will she react afterwards? How will this affect her relationship with Mathew? What was that like before?

I could send you a draft of a story where a woman has her first threesome and then has an evening with a woman and then sex with one of the men again, but while your feedback might help me, I'm not sure it would help you, apart from firming up ideas about why you are doing certain bits your way.

* Mary is on her back, and Lizzy is on her stomach
* Mary isn't thinking too much about Matthew; Lizzy is the aggressor and Mary is overwhelmed by the feelings Lizzy is bringing out in her
* Mary has never had sex with Lizzy before
* Mary had an affair with another woman, but she was very uncomfortable with it. Mary thinks of herself as straight, and that the prior affair with a woman was a one-off
* Lizzy is openly gay, and part of the reason she's seducing Mary is to get Mary to accept being bisexual
* Matthew isn't that important. He's totally loyal to Lizzy and going along with what she wants. He was very loving and supportive of Mary before and will be afterward. He's going to fuck Mary because Lizzy wants him to fuck Mary, not because he wants to fuck Mary (but he enjoys fucking Mary)

I'd describing my method for writing sex scenes is to transcribe a sex scene, slipping in dialog as appropriate. Sometimes I transcribe a sex scene that is in my head, sometimes it's a porn video. I wrote the foreplay scene prior to this sex scene by transcribing a porn video of two women kissing. So I'm looking for similar sex scenes to what I want to write that I can put into my own words with my own dialog to handle the story elements of the sex scene. If you don't mind sending me your story draft, I'll look it over and see if it's something I can put into my words as I want. Send me a PM, and I'll send you my email address.

 

[SimonDoom]

I'd say that one of my strengths as an erotic writer is that I write long, detailed, creative sex scenes. I could write, "Lizzy's tongue felt so good, and I quickly came," but I feel that'd be very unsatisfying to my readers. I've taken them on a 22K word journey, and the final sex scene should be long enough for them to feel that taking the trip was worthwhile. The word count will fall where it will, but by giving a word count I feel I'm specifying the kind of sex scene in a story that I'm looking for as a possible inspiration.

You are an experienced author and you take a lot of time doing what you do, and you have very particular ideas about how you like to do things (that's a good thing), and I think you probably would be better served just doing your own search among Lesbian sex stories. Then you will get the perspective of women authors writing about how women experience sex. But the key thing is, you're going to have to find someone who writes in a way that you like, and nobody can tell you who that is. Scan your list of female authors that you have followed.

There are plenty of women authors who publish often and contribute often to this forum, and you can check out some of their stories. It would take three minutes to pull up a few sample stories and see how they do things. You'll be better off doing that than waiting for responses.

I think your initial question is a good one, and as a male author it's something I ask of myself all the time, but I actually don't think it's that difficult. There's no standard woman, any more than there's such a thing as a standard man, and no standard way a woman experiences sex. Devise your character carefully, and everything else will flow from that.

 

[the_single_gal_unconfidential]

here's a prelude you can use. real life my first ffm,
my life of fun has not always been with guys. there's been times when I didn't have any guy going on - so I was with gals.
I don't consider myself bi or les, but I do like the ff gentle attention and caressing.
Anyway, this gal friend and I were part o a group of 6 gals, varying degrees of les. T
he friend this is about is def bi, and married. She and I broke off from the group and would have our own interludes. She and her husband have a nice swimming pool and hot tub etc, which I very much like.
They're some 8 yrs younger than me, married a long time - and open and ready for some sexual spice. That's where I come in haha.
So she popped the question to me about an ffm and I agreed. No guy in my life at the time and an opportunity to try a cock doggy while I'm going down on her. At that time I'd never been spit roasted.
So it was a nice warm summer Sunday morning, we sent him out to the hot tub with the drinks - then when he was all settled in, we walked out nude carrying the food.
we ate chatted, he's quite charming and funny.
We had some sexy talk, I mentioned that I'd gone so long wo a cock that I attained virgin status. stuff like that.
I'd broken the ice by feeling his thighs, starting with his knees and all the way up to his balls and cock.
This was all pre approved by my gal friend. He liked the closeup views of my ass and pussy when I reached for more food. titties too. I was very much enjoying it too.
I have a thing for sopping wet cocks, and wanting to suck them. so I did that too, right in front of my friend. That was sort of a test I did, to see how she reacted.
Anyway, we went inside to do the do. She had a large pad set up on the floor that worked good for the three of us.
I'll let you do the details of the sucking and fucking, as our's was a bit uncoordinated - three amateur ffm'ers.
But what did happen, ant one point, I was going down on her, and had my ass up in his face. basically.
He was back there poking around, looking in my holes, clit maybe. I had a full beaver then.
Anyway I could sense that he was about to go in me doggystyle, I really didn't want his cock in my pussy, or ass. Just didn't feel like I was ready for it.
So I did the next best thing and sucked and stroked him off.
Geezus was he ready. His cum shot all over the place. my face, hair, her back and ass area. my arm etc. haha.

Anyway, you can use any or all of that as a set up your story. if you like.

 

[lovecraft68]

First, and this might just be me and my style, you have the sex scene mapped out like a paint by numbers, just start and let it flow, its sex, its natural, let it unfold don't lock yourself in to an instruction manual.
Second, agree with Simon, its not good to read other people's scenes for how to write yours, their voice messes with yours.
Third, you're a good writer and been writing here for a while, you don't need help, you got this, now go get it done