I’m Wondering….

Shymidwestgirl

Sparkling and Sassy
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Feb 22, 2016
Posts
6,195
I’ve retyped this many, many times. I’m hoping this time I feel it worth of an actual post.

Do I post what I want? What I like? What I think I want? What I think I like? (Yeah, for the most part I know what I want and like).

Is any one person able to fill all of what one seeks? Or do we go with what fits best?

Ok here’s my shot in the dark. A vague description of some characteristics I think would be suitable to my personality. Plus some shallow things I just like in general.

I’ve got I believe a decent profile filled out so I won’t repeat what I’ve already put in writing.

Are you spontaneous, clever, must like animals, can be comfortable in a worn in leather jacket and a dinner jacket (not at the same time….), follow some sports, and of course the most important part is be a mind reader! I really prefer a man in my age group and if you wear cowboy boots that’s a plus. But I doubt (and I could be wrong) that many Brits wear cowboy boots….
 
Is any one person able to fill all of what one seeks? Or do we go with what fits best?

I have somewhat slowly come to the realization that -- at least in my experience -- no one person is capable of being everything I want in a partner. I've tried three times now (two marriages and one four-year girlfriend). I think that the best way to approach it (if one even desires to try and approach something logically that's so laden with emotion) is to identify what your must-haves are, and then see who meets those. After that threshhold is crossed, go for as many of the nice-to-haves as you can possibly get :).

I think I've reached about 80% to 85% of complete, delirious happiness, so I'm fortunate. As I get older, however, I'm feeling the lack of the missing 15% to 20% more acutely.

This would be a phenomenal rationale for cheating, by the way, if anyone is looking for that.
 
Can you realistically expect that one person can completely meet another person's need and desires, especially when it is just confined to online. In my opinion you can never really know a person if you have not met them for real and have spent time with them.

As long as you enjoy conversing with the other person, whether through PM, email, phone or whatever then I would say that is a win. Take it for what it is, a virtual relationship.
 
Can you realistically expect that one person can completely meet another person's need and desires, especially when it is just confined to online. In my opinion you can never really know a person if you have not met them for real and have spent time with them.

As long as you enjoy conversing with the other person, whether through PM, email, phone or whatever then I would say that is a win. Take it for what it is, a virtual relationship.
I agree with that when it comes to chatting. I just assume everyone is lying about everything until we decide to really get to know each other. Then it's required that I know you're who you say you are. Only then can we get to requirements like an interest in sports (yes), cowboy boots (yes) and so on...
 
I’ve retyped this many, many times. I’m hoping this time I feel it worth of an actual post.

Do I post what I want? What I like? What I think I want? What I think I like? (Yeah, for the most part I know what I want and like).

Is any one person able to fill all of what one seeks? Or do we go with what fits best?

Ok here’s my shot in the dark. A vague description of some characteristics I think would be suitable to my personality. Plus some shallow things I just like in general.

I’ve got I believe a decent profile filled out so I won’t repeat what I’ve already put in writing.

Are you spontaneous, clever, must like animals, can be comfortable in a worn in leather jacket and a dinner jacket (not at the same time….), follow some sports, and of course the most important part is be a mind reader! I really prefer a man in my age group and if you wear cowboy boots that’s a plus. But I doubt (and I could be wrong) that many Brits wear cowboy boots….

I try not to have any expectations, because it is quite possible that when the thing that you desire finds you, it will be better than you could ever imagine for yourself.
 
hey...

Can you realistically expect that one person can completely meet another person's need and desires, especially when it is just confined to online. In my opinion you can never really know a person if you have not met them for real and have spent time with them.

As long as you enjoy conversing with the other person, whether through PM, email, phone or whatever then I would say that is a win. Take it for what it is, a virtual relationship.

Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit! even after meeting someone you STILL don't know anything about them. My wife and I have been together for 46 years and if I was to tell you that I know everything I need to know about her, I would a bald-faced liar of the most terrible kind. We will ONLY EVER KNOW what they are willing to show us and even that isn't etched in stone and is in a state of flux even as we are in a constant state of flux and change.
 
Bullshit to everyone who says settle

What you are asking for is in no way too much to ask. Come on people, there are like Billions of fucking people out there are these traits are not that far off, unless you really take into account the last request, being a mind reader, but then again, getting to know someone really well helps you pick up on the other persons mood swings.

Don't settle, keep on looking and for fuck sake, if he doesn't wear cowboy boots, its because he never owned a comfortable pair. I compare this to guys who like their women to wear pretty bras and panties. You gotta be willing to help the other person out with what gets them excited.

Cheers. and keep on looking.
 
Perhaps you should be made aware that here in the UK the term 'cowboy' is generally used pejoratively - we have no fawning fondness for your Old West as you do.

That aside, you do not actually state what you want from this 'ideal guy'. Is it a relationship? If so, what? Messaging? Penpalling?

Post stuff this vague and it will get the responses it deserves...

... but then you probably realised that when you posted it....
 
I learned through personal experience and through Esther Perel's phenomenal books that one person meeting all sexual needs is as rare as hen's teeth or rocking horse manure. So I was able to let go of giving myself and others a hard time. And through my new awareness via the books, both I and my partners had hot side dishes. And it made things between my partners and I steamy as hell as we were focusing on what we both sizzled with.
 
I’ve retyped this many, many times. I’m hoping this time I feel it worth of an actual post.

Do I post what I want? What I like? What I think I want? What I think I like? (Yeah, for the most part I know what I want and like).

Is any one person able to fill all of what one seeks? Or do we go with what fits best?

Ok here’s my shot in the dark. A vague description of some characteristics I think would be suitable to my personality. Plus some shallow things I just like in general.

I’ve got I believe a decent profile filled out so I won’t repeat what I’ve already put in writing.

Are you spontaneous, clever, must like animals, can be comfortable in a worn in leather jacket and a dinner jacket (not at the same time….), follow some sports, and of course the most important part is be a mind reader! I really prefer a man in my age group and if you wear cowboy boots that’s a plus. But I doubt (and I could be wrong) that many Brits wear cowboy boots….
I sent a PM
 
I’ve retyped this many, many times. I’m hoping this time I feel it worth of an actual post.

Do I post what I want? What I like? What I think I want? What I think I like? (Yeah, for the most part I know what I want and like).

Is any one person able to fill all of what one seeks? Or do we go with what fits best?

Ok here’s my shot in the dark. A vague description of some characteristics I think would be suitable to my personality. Plus some shallow things I just like in general.

I’ve got I believe a decent profile filled out so I won’t repeat what I’ve already put in writing.

Are you spontaneous, clever, must like animals, can be comfortable in a worn in leather jacket and a dinner jacket (not at the same time….), follow some sports, and of course the most important part is be a mind reader! I really prefer a man in my age group and if you wear cowboy boots that’s a plus. But I doubt (and I could be wrong) that many Brits wear cowboy boots….
Well...... I'm not a brit but I wear cowboy boots lol good day beautiful from Canada
 
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