Wife expressed interest in being with a woman

[Lovethefox]

So my wife mentioned while we were playing that she would like to be with a woman and would love it if I would watch and maybe participate.
What is the best way to go about this?
Fetlife, AFF, other forums?
I am excited and also somewhat nervous about this.

Perhaps to test the waters, I can take her to a club and see how she reacts to a lap dance.
Neither of us had ever done anything like this before

 

[Smoothshavendad]

So my wife mentioned while we were playing that she would like to be with a woman and would love it if I would watch and maybe participate.
What is the best way to go about this?
Fetlife, AFF, other forums?
I am excited and also somewhat nervous about this.

Perhaps to test the waters, I can take her to a club and see how she reacts to a lap dance.
Neither of us had ever done anything like this before

You lucky dog! This is a huge turn on for me!!!

 

[Lovethefox]

You lucky dog! This is a huge turn on for me!!!

Me as well. It may take some time to come to fruition however. We’ll see how it goes

 

[davion2308]

She mentioned it

Sure, she mentioned it as a fantasy but when it comes to reality, you can pump the brakes a bit here.

Ask her what she sees happening. Ask her to walk you through the experience and how it would work. Let her create the environment she sees and listen to her. She's in control since it's her fantasy and you should let her drive.

It'd be a mistake to say, "Cool, let's hop on Doublelist and find swingers to fuck!" or otherwise hijack her thing.

Your best way to go about it is to listen, acknowledge, and let her suggest the next thing. If you two have no history of playing with other people, and she's never really been with a woman before, it's good to go nice and easy. Reality doesn't always play out how we want it while fantasies always work.

Let her make the next moves.

 

[hulmule]

Sure, she mentioned it as a fantasy but when it comes to reality, you can pump the brakes a bit here.

Ask her what she sees happening. Ask her to walk you through the experience and how it would work. Let her create the environment she sees and listen to her. She's in control since it's her fantasy and you should let her drive.

It'd be a mistake to say, "Cool, let's hop on Doublelist and find swingers to fuck!" or otherwise hijack her thing.

Your best way to go about it is to listen, acknowledge, and let her suggest the next thing. If you two have no history of playing with other people, and she's never really been with a woman before, it's good to go nice and easy. Reality doesn't always play out how we want it while fantasies always work.

Let her make the next moves.

Yes well said. Let her go at her pace. Otherwise you'll ruin the mood for her. Relax and enjoy her speaking. Listen dont speak lol

 

[Lovethefox]

Thanks for the input.
I agree, we’re on step one of the many things that need to happen before we try to find the right one for us.

 

[KatieDoes]

Sure, she mentioned it as a fantasy but when it comes to reality, you can pump the brakes a bit here.

Ask her what she sees happening. Ask her to walk you through the experience and how it would work. Let her create the environment she sees and listen to her. She's in control since it's her fantasy and you should let her drive.

It'd be a mistake to say, "Cool, let's hop on Doublelist and find swingers to fuck!" or otherwise hijack her thing.

Your best way to go about it is to listen, acknowledge, and let her suggest the next thing. If you two have no history of playing with other people, and she's never really been with a woman before, it's good to go nice and easy. Reality doesn't always play out how we want it while fantasies always work.

Let her make the next moves.

That’s great advice.

As a woman with similar interests, definitely let her lead. Don’t push it, and don’t make it about you.

Very (VERY) often, a large motivating factor in women looking to explore with other women, is the curiosity about being with someone that isn’t selfish.

Like… genuinely unselfish. Not like ‘ I’m awesome because I always make a woman cum!’ Men often make even that about them and their ego.

It’s great that you have a relationship where she feels safe and open with you, and can confess her fantasies and wants to include you in them. Just don’t push too hard and make it about yourself. Unless you want to risk being left out of it.

If she’s down for it, a strip club and a lap dance would be a great start. It’s relatively risk free, emotionally. Tip your dancer well!

 

[buckeye426]

Same

My wife has mentioned the same. I have also suggested the strip club first. It is a fine line to walk, being extremely excited but not too excited to push.

 

[Lovethefox]

That’s great advice.

As a woman with similar interests, definitely let her lead. Don’t push it, and don’t make it about you.

Very (VERY) often, a large motivating factor in women looking to explore with other women, is the curiosity about being with someone that isn’t selfish.

Like… genuinely unselfish. Not like ‘ I’m awesome because I always make a woman cum!’ Men often make even that about them and their ego.

It’s great that you have a relationship where she feels safe and open with you, and can confess her fantasies and wants to include you in them. Just don’t push too hard and make it about yourself. Unless you want to risk being left out of it.

If she’s down for it, a strip club and a lap dance would be a great start. It’s relatively risk free, emotionally. Tip your dancer well!

We are still discussing different scenarios at her pace right now. As you said, I’m trying not to push too hard or not at all. It’s difficult because this is something I want as well. Some have suggested that I find someone with experience for her to chat with first, so perhaps I should place something in the personals.
She also mentioned to me that I could find someone for her(us) but it’s difficult ti know the right thing to do and at what pace.

 

[twister947]

I would back off, and let her find her own playmate. If that works out, then if you've been a good boy, you'll receive an invitation.

 

[Lovethefox]

I would back off, and let her find her own playmate. If that works out, then if you've been a good boy, you'll receive an invitation.

You may be right. Perhaps she should come on here and look around for herself.

 

[PapaDan]

So my wife mentioned while we were playing that she would like to be with a woman and would love it if I would watch and maybe participate.
What is the best way to go about this?
Fetlife, AFF, other forums?
I am excited and also somewhat nervous about this.

Perhaps to test the waters, I can take her to a club and see how she reacts to a lap dance.
Neither of us had ever done anything like this before

Considering the risks of covid and STDs, you might want to consider finding someone you know and trust. A threesome like you describe is not as uncommon as you might think. If your wife works, or has a lot of friends, she probably already knows someone who would be interested, normal people just don't advertise it publically.

 

[Cleanshaved50]

So my wife mentioned while we were playing that she would like to be with a woman and would love it if I would watch and maybe participate.
What is the best way to go about this?
Fetlife, AFF, other forums?
I am excited and also somewhat nervous about this.

Perhaps to test the waters, I can take her to a club and see how she reacts to a lap dance.
Neither of us had ever done anything like this before

You are very fortunate to have a wife that likes to explore. I have tried many times to have my wife be with another woman, even suggested she could be with another man. Will never happen
Have fun with your new venture!!!

 

[Lovethefox]

You are very fortunate to have a wife that likes to explore. I have tried many times to have my wife be with another woman, even suggested she could be with another man. Will never happen
Have fun with your new venture!!!

Never say never. I would’ve thought the same 20 years ago too

 

[Lovethefox]

Considering the risks of covid and STDs, you might want to consider finding someone you know and trust. A threesome like you describe is not as uncommon as you might think. If your wife works, or has a lot of friends, she probably already knows someone who would be interested, normal people just don't advertise it publically.

Agreed, that is a concern not to be taken lightly.
We are in the early stages of exploration on this. Far from the selection process but I’m sure there are some out there for us if we’re smart about it

 

[hbcacouple]

My curiosity

Wewere newlyweds in our mid twenties. I was very interested in finding a girl but unwilling to approach anyone that I knew or encounterd. My husband solved the problem by making a number of postings on CL. F4f didn't seem to work. Cpl4f was a total bust. Cpl4cpl was great. He posted that; bi curious female for 4 on the bed fun. No full swap. We were overwhelmed with responses. My first selection was a young couple with a superhot 19 or 20 year old female. Because she was a litte younger, it made it easy for me to be more dominant and we had great fun for months. We played as a foursome and we had sme great adventures with just the two of us.
Following further adventures with other couples and women, I now carefully approach women on my own.

 

[Smoothshavendad]

Wewere newlyweds in our mid twenties. I was very interested in finding a girl but unwilling to approach anyone that I knew or encounterd. My husband solved the problem by making a number of postings on CL. F4f didn't seem to work. Cpl4f was a total bust. Cpl4cpl was great. He posted that; bi curious female for 4 on the bed fun. No full swap. We were overwhelmed with responses. My first selection was a young couple with a superhot 19 or 20 year old female. Because she was a litte younger, it made it easy for me to be more dominant and we had great fun for months. We played as a foursome and we had sme great adventures with just the two of us.
Following further adventures with other couples and women, I now carefully approach women on my own.

Well aren’t you the sexy, naughty one! Love it!!!

 

[rinaopps]

I think that when your wife has cheated on you with a woman just for fun and experience but she loves you, it's no big deal) You could also try it with a man so it wouldn't hurt) I personally agreed with my husband that I can sometimes play with women in intimate toys I just love Clitoral Vibrators, we bought them from a shop online, the website https://kinkazoid.com/clitoral-vibrators/ is a huge selection for girls and guys, I recommend trying something new, the feeling is incredible))