Cock Talk

[hotwords229_A]

Hotwords’ post the other day sent me to some dark dark places in my quest for cockoddities. Now, in the dark of night with only the glow of my iPad and this song on repeat, like a creepy internet cock hunter.. I deliver a few of them to you, my lucky friends.


Cockoddity
Need a severed cock for your next Halloween key party? Grab one here..


Cockoddity
Roberto has the world’s largest cock. He can keep it. 18.9 inches. Holy moly. Not even the tip thanks. At least it gets him disabled parking. Turns out Roberto not only has a giant cock, he also IS a giant cock and was deported for ….*unspeakable Lit words*

Cockoddity
Is this really the pickled pecker of old mate, Ra Ra Rasputin Lover of the Russian queen? I say they drain it …. get some DNA and find out if that’s human and end it once for and all.
Either way, that thing’s seen better days. AMIRITE?

Cockoddity
In the Olympic Spirit the Icelandic Handball Team, as all good hand to ball teams do after winning silver, had their cocks cast in silver. I’m unclear if it was from their actual medals but that would be a ballsy move. You know I’m right.

This is great work! I’m glad to have inspired your journey of thrusting yourself into the dark holes of the internet; poking around, going in and out until knowledge spurt forward and all over all of us. That’s what this thread is really all about.

Great Halloween costume idea for a proper lady: dress up as a female Edward G. Robinson and chomp on one of those severed penises like a cigar and say “Look at this see? Myeah!” a lot.

Largest cock? I bet it’s only 19.8 inches and he’s rounding up. Typical guy.

I’m disputin’ that’s Rasputin.

I’m mostly fascinated by the handball team’s silver dicks. I can only assume that there is a serious werewolf problem in Iceland and this is their covert way of preparing for the oncoming Werewolf Apocalypse. This would make for an absolutely amazing film. Where’s Roger Corman when you need him?

 

[Dionysian Beast]

Oh, I spent hours dwelling in the land of cocks. There’s more where that came from. (That’s what he said.)

That was quite the excellent job

 

[Endless_Night]

< I’m mostly fascinated by the handball team’s silver dicks. I can only assume that there is a serious werewolf problem in Iceland and this is their covert way of preparing for the oncoming Werewolf Apocalypse. This would make for an absolutely amazing film. Where’s Roger Corman when you need him?

This paragraph completely derailed my ability to finish catching up on the thread.

-Serious werewolf problem in Iceland?
-Preparing for the oncoming Werewolf Apocalypse?
-Absolutely amazing film?




A book. A film. A book and a film.

I NEED THIS IN MY LIFE


Like, yesterday. Like, seriously.

 

[Acktion]

Oh Lorena and whatever his name was! I wonder whatever happened to that sweet, loved-up pairing.

Jon Wayne, I think.

And from what I understand, he made a couple of porns. "Uncut" and "Frankenpenis" I believe.

 

[ShaneoD]

I've always imagined that a guy's first-ever erection must be at least a little scary. I mean, that little floppy tube of flesh that he peed out of is suddenly quite a bit bigger and straight and hard. Will it be staying that way forever? Should he tell someone? Will he need to see a doctor?

I'll admit I had some of these emotions the first time I ejaculated, I'd had erections but never one like 'that', lying in bed wondering why it was almost painful, pushing it down, it springs back up, grabbing it, then moving my hand back and forth wondering why it felt so hot, then getting light headed, not knowing why it was jumping around, wondering if it was ever going to stop. Then just lying there wondering what had just happened.

 

[LAHomedog]

I've always imagined that a guy's first-ever erection must be at least a little scary. I mean, that little floppy tube of flesh that he peed out of is suddenly quite a bit bigger and straight and hard. Will it be staying that way forever? Should he tell someone? Will he need to see a doctor?

Not true for me. I discovered orgasm while soaping myself in the shower and thought it was the coolest thing of all time. Couldn't wait to do it again, and again, and again. Nothing scary in anyway. Delightful, wonderful, exciting, thrilling, (BTW: Guys get erections most of their lives. At least I did. You just don't know the why or have the sexual feelings or urges. When my son was young he called them "stingies.")

 

[hotwords229_A]

Would you, could you in the nude?
Would you, could you with a dude?

https://64.media.tumblr.com/6a2966d908cb25de7c8ed239b1e1c7dd/3dfffa29fb801477-89/s640x960/41237e0500338943466892ad4dbae33be1b2561f.jpg

I think most (every single) guys have dreamed of threesomes. But we always default to the two girls one guy model. Whether that’s due to selfishness or dickphobia I don’t know.

Until recently I haven’t given it much thought. I always assumed it would be too much to handle from the female perspective, 2 guys I mean. But there are plenty of women willing and able and filled with desire to give themselves over to two dudes who have her best interests at heart. I get it. Having multiple women going to town on me would be a dream come true so why not the other way around.

The hurdle I would have to overcome would be territoriality, jealousy and possessiveness. Not easy things to overcome. I still think there is no way I could ever “share” a woman I was truly in love with, I admire guys who can, but that ain’t me.

But someone I’m attracted to, someone I really want to bang, like, enjoy, be friends with—why not?

The other catch is, how far would I be willing to go? If I’m in, then I’m in. Sex should always be something that progresses to whatever feels right at the time and I don’t think it could be enjoyable to worry about balls touching, or anything like that. I’d have to just go with it and see what happens. So MFM is out, it would have to be MMF (and yes, there is a distinction).


Have you ever been in an MMF threesome?
Have you ever wanted to be?
How far would you be willing to go?
Do you think threesomes work best as a free for all or should each person get their own turn?
Ladies, what would you most like to get, see, do out of an MMF situation?

 

[Endless_Night]

Have you ever been in an MMF threesome?
Have you ever wanted to be?
How far would you be willing to go?
Do you think threesomes work best as a free for all or should each person get their own turn?
Ladies, what would you most like to get, see, do out of an MMF situation?

-Nope
-Eh
- I am going to need that question better defined.
-Hmm. Not enough experience to know.
-Eh


Not really a question in my bailiwick, but I'm interested to see other people's ideas on the subject.

 

[Cogan]

Have you ever been in an MMF threesome?
No.
Have you ever wanted to be?
Yes.
How far would you be willing to go?
All the way.
Do you think threesomes work best as a free for all or should each person get their own turn?
Since I have no experience it's hard to answer truly. But as I picture the situation it will be about giving and receiving pleasure to each other, so play with what's nearest to you and enjoy.
Ladies, what would you most like to get, see, do out of an MMF situation?
This will be interesting to read.

 

[hotoldrguy]

Have you ever been in an MMF threesome? no
Have you ever wanted to be? have thought about it. would be worried the other two would connect and I would be left by the wayside
How far would you be willing to go? since I would be completely aroused almost anything would go
Do you think threesomes work best as a free for all or should each person get their own turn? guess it would depend on the people involved
Ladies, what would you most like to get, see, do out of an MMF situation?

 

[hotwords229_A]

-Nope
-Eh
- I am going to need that question better defined.
-Hmm. Not enough experience to know.
-Eh


Not really a question in my bailiwick, but I'm interested to see other people's ideas on the subject.

Better defined, eh? In other words how bi would you be willing to get (as a guy) and what pleasures do you dream of (as a woman).

An example: if I’m with two girls I don’t want them to be shy with each other. I want them both blowing me at the same time, I want them making out with each other, I want one to go down on the other while I go down on her and vice versa, etc . . .

These are questions that are totally in my ballisack, I mean bailiwick.

 

[LAHomedog]

Would you, could you in the nude?
Would you, could you with a dude?

Have you ever been in an MMF threesome?
Have you ever wanted to be?
How far would you be willing to go?
Do you think threesomes work best as a free for all or should each person get their own turn?
Ladies, what would you most like to get, see, do out of an MMF situation?

I have and both ways.

First, some specifics from my experience: MFM works better in terms of anatomy and sexual possibility than FMF. Think about it. Straight MFM two dicks three holes. Straight FMF one dick, six holes. If it is Bi MMF now you have two dicks and seven holes. Better math. A lot more fun.

I have experienced all of the above. I have been in straight MFM where you would never "cross swords." I have been the lucky subject of FFM a couple of times. Those were always started by the women and usually a party and alot of alcohol and weed were involved.

I like Bi MFM. If you can let your fears and judgments go away and enjoy the pleasures available it can be the greatest experience in bed ever. But you have to be able to let go of your hangups. Not everybody's cup of tea.

And yes, (since you're wondering) I have been both a top and a bottom even though I am an alpha male an most definitely a top. I just thought, hell! You've got to try everything in life once.

Actually, I prefer same-room sex. No swapping. No touching. Two couples doing it in the same space. Live porn. You are fucking and watching the others. Hottest thing ever.

 

[Endless_Night]

Better defined, eh? In other words how bi would you be willing to get (as a guy) and what pleasures do you dream of (as a woman).

An example: if I’m with two girls I don’t want them to be shy with each other. I want them both blowing me at the same time, I want them making out with each other, I want one to go down on the other while I go down on her and vice versa, etc . . .

These are questions that are totally in my ballisack, I mean bailiwick.

Uhh…that might have been a leetle more defined than I was expecting.

Ahem.

Let's see…. I've done the FFM. I did *stuff* but I definitely don't consider myself bi, or have any sexual desire towards woman. Presumably it would be the same if I were male. I'm not quite sure if that answers the "how bi am I willing to get" question.

I might have fallen asleep part way through, which pretty much sums the "pleasures do you dream of as woman" question.

Would that be different in a MFM? No idea.



The need to gender flip these questions make them surprisingly difficult to answer.

 

[Endless_Night]

< First, some specifics from my experience: MFM works better in terms of anatomy and sexual possibility than FMF. Think about it. Straight MFM two dicks three holes. Straight FMF one dick, six holes. If it is Bi MMF now you have two dicks and seven holes. Better math. A lot more fun. >

*approves the use of math in this answer*

 

[AnnyMouse28]

I’m still trying to work out the difference between MMF and MFM. Is the first two guys with a girl and the second a MF couple with another guy?

 

[LAHomedog]

I’m still trying to work out the difference between MMF and MFM. Is the first two guys with a girl and the second a MF couple with another guy?

MFM usually applies to a straight three-way. Two guys and one woman with the woman being the object of affection and the guys do not interact sexually with each other.

MMF usually applies to a bi-sex three-way where everybody plays with each other.

Conversely, FMF and FFM are the same, but different gender configurations.

 

[hotwords229_A]

It depends who you ask.

MMF for example indicates there’s three people having sex, male 1, male 2 and a female. Male 1. Male 2. Female all have sex with each other. In other circles it would indicate that only Male 1 has interactions with Male 2 and the Female also has interactions only with Male 2.

Similar scenario for MFM. Just mix the positioning.

It pays to lay out the expectations before hand so you’re all aware of what’s going on and where it might go.

We need a diagram for this!

For me, MMF means everybody fucks everybody.

 

[LAHomedog]

For me, MMF means everybody fucks everybody.

My understand too. MFM is straight. MMF is bi. FMF is straight. FFM is bi.

 

[Endless_Night]

Huh. Color me bemused. I had not the slightest idea the order of the letters carried significance.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Huh. Color me bemused. I had not the slightest idea the order of the letters carried significance.

That’s what this thread is all about, bemusement. I also learned the order of letters mattered right here on Lit a while ago. Who knew!

 

[LAHomedog]

Huh. Color me bemused. I had not the slightest idea the order of the letters carried significance.

If you are posting a story where there is a three-way I've learned that the order of the letters is important in your story description and also your story tags. I learned that one the hard way

 

[FranklyFrank]

That’s what this thread is all about, bemusement. I also learned the order of letters mattered right here on Lit a while ago. Who knew!

Is this a spin off of new math?? We certainly need a flow chart.

Who's on first again?

 

[Endless_Night]

That’s what this thread is all about, bemusement. >

Oh, hush, you!

If you are posting a story where there is a three-way I've learned that the order of the letters is important in your story description and also your story tags. I learned that one the hard way

Yeeees. I can see where the disappointment of reader expectation might ensue, and some of those reviewers are brutal!

 

[hotwords229_A]

Show,
Show,
Show your bone,
Gently for a cause . . .

https://64.media.tumblr.com/381e665797000b5c8ccd76d27add3164/82404840064956db-91/s1280x1920/87fc9f680065f368869537c12be9f182813021da.png

It was almost Christmas and I was getting on a plane in a few hours. I was about to leave work when a girl approached me and asked if I would pose for her “The Men of -xxx- (<—where we worked)” calendar for her secret Santa (another girl at work). I agreed, but we had no time to plan, so I just did a totally lame holiday pose and went on my way.

When I returned I found out that the calendar had quickly turned into a beefcake calendar with a lot of the guys stripping down and doing “sexy” poses. Some of them were even naked with strategically placed props and I became super jealous. My pic was fully clothed and, in my opinion, pretty stupid and boring. I would have loved the chance to do a sexy pose and then be at the party when the gift was opened and all the girls were ogling our pics. But I missed the party and the opportunity to do a sexy pic. Probably for the best, I wouldn’t want that calendar coming back to haunt me later. I will say that I got a lot of compliments for doing the calendar at all, even though I was clothed. In some cases, my picture seemed to be more popular than the naked guys, probably because it maintained an air of mystery?

All this to say, if I had posed naked and the pic came back to haunt me somehow I would just seem a little pervy, but if the calendar had been for a charity I’d be considered heroic (using that term loosely). Why is that?

This Warwick Rowers Calendar is apparently a long standing tradition where the men of the team pose naked and sell calendars. This seems odd to me. It seems fun as hell and I’d totally take part, but I can’t help but wonder how it affects their future. They’re going to college to advance in life and get real jobs and one of the first things people will know is—so you’re in a naked calendar.

Does it help them get the job because it was for charity?
If it wasn’t for charity would employers feel differently about it?
What do their parents think?
Would you want to pay for your kid to go to college and pose nude for a calendar?
Is it the selflessness of the act of getting naked for charity that makes it seem less perverted?
Have you ever posed nude or sexy for a calendar, or charity event in some way?
Did you regret it?
How did your family, friends react?
If someone asked you to pose nude for charity would you do it?

 

[hotwords229_A]

I mean I have photos but that’s a whole other thread entirely.

Make sure to send me the link to that thread.