KPaulNeilson
Literotica Guru
- Joined
- Sep 17, 2019
- Posts
- 828
I just miss being wanted, desired, looked at as a man, not a chore or a roommate.
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I just miss being wanted, desired, looked at as a man, not a chore or a roommate.
Sometimes I wish my sex drive would just go away so I wouldn’t care about this so much
You are the exception, not the rule. Every girl should be so lucky to have someone like you in their life. These things are complicated and messy and no one can ever really know what brings people to this point.
This sounds like two intelligent people, discussing reality in a very "real" way......*sigh*
This sounds like two intelligent people, discussing reality in a very "real" way......*sigh*
Yes, he’s filled the empty places in my heart with love and kindness. Sometimes you have to find a solution that allows you to find a little happiness while trying to keep it all together when things are hard.
You are the exception, not the rule. Every girl should be so lucky to have someone like you in their life. These things are complicated and messy and no one can ever really know what brings people to this point.
Had an affair w/ someone I worked with.
Word to the wise, be cautious. Its never a simple as it seems.
Had an affair w/ someone I worked with.
We worked together on a challenge project and a demanding client. I was the IT muscle and brain. She was the articulate and concise communicator. After a rocky start, we made a very good team. She help me w/ my writing skills. I help her with data analysis and analytics.
I don't think neither one of use would had made / accepted the first moved unless we had a connection. Initially, we were filling a need for each other. When we began to fall in love with each other, we decided to part ways.
Word to the wise, be cautious. Its never a simple as it seems.
Amen... never easy to let go once you cross a line.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't! It is an extremely complicated issue, one I never fully appreciated when I first started having affairs. Quite honestly, I became addicted to the idea - of hooking up with someone and getting away with it, of leading such a double life. It was insane and self-destructive. Then I fell for one of them and that changed everything - she made me realize that what I needed was the connection, not the sex, the playful, flirtatious intimacy that one doesn't get from a hook-up, or from my marriage. Even though that is what I yearn for, need in my life, it is so complicated to find and so challenging to contain it within a box, that I've given up...
I just can't be anything else or do it any other way.
I want that emotional attachment to be satisfied in the relationship. If that's not there, what is the point?
No, there isn't really a substitute for the situation at home, but my hope is that it will make both of our lives better without changing our current situations in a bad way. You still have to live your life as you are, and I can't see throwing a spouse I care about to the curb because of something that isn't within her grasp to control. We've built a life together, have children together and although we don't have sex, we still have a relationship.
The choices are not easy, however.
Damned if you do, damned if you don't! It is an extremely complicated issue, one I never fully appreciated when I first started having affairs. Quite honestly, I became addicted to the idea - of hooking up with someone and getting away with it, of leading such a double life. It was insane and self-destructive. Then I fell for one of them and that changed everything - she made me realize that what I needed was the connection, not the sex, the playful, flirtatious intimacy that one doesn't get from a hook-up, or from my marriage. Even though that is what I yearn for, need in my life, it is so complicated to find and so challenging to contain it within a box, that I've given up...
I just miss being wanted, desired, looked at as a man, not a chore or a roommate.
A lot of the time I just want my wife to pay attention to me. Can have a whole conversation and she not hear me. She's too busy reading a book or looking at Facebook
I would go for some more communicating, if at all possible. Ask her why she has thought of separating. I would only go out looking for sex (if wife told me to), if I did not want to leave my home-life (be it growing kids, or still getting along great with wife except for sex).
I have a needy child, so will not be going anywhere for some time. It would have to be really horrible for me to leave. This at least gives the wife and I more time to keep trying to work things out. When she is in an open mind and we communicate, things get better for awhile.
I have found that I need to pick my battles.
I invite my wife out for dinner, that usually relaxes her. Away from the teenagers and work stress. It’s amazing how in the mood they will be on the way home!
At home, we have a no phone at the dinner table rule.
Alas, Facebook and real books also do happen, but that’s just life, just like alcohol, all in moderation.
V.
Hey CCS, send her a text message.
Have a message ready to send (or duck out to the bathroom to write it), then do not send it until after you are at the table. Send it covertly.
Watch her eyes as she reads, "so whatcha doing sexy?".
Hopefully she doesn't roll her eyes.
Hey CCS, send her a text message.
Have a message ready to send (or duck out to the bathroom to write it), then do not send it until after you are at the table. Send it covertly.
Watch her eyes as she reads, "so whatcha doing sexy?".
Hopefully she doesn't roll her eyes.
. She says she is no longer in love and needs to find herself and her purpose in life. This is after having three kids.
I really hope you did not mean it like that ^^^
So today things kind of hit a breaking point......
I asked if we could do massages in bed tonight since it has been almost 5 months since some kind of intimacy. She said she thought it had been longer. Anyways, she says she has no desire and hasn't for a while. She also has no want to go to a doctor and see about fixing it.
She has been saying she wants to separate for a while now. She said today that maybe I should just go find somone to handle sex so she doesn't have to. Don't know what to do now. Its what I wanted but feels like a trap at the same time.....
Are you ok?
Been there, done that, got the eye roll. It was a quiet dinner