Spiritedlady
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Just out of interest how would she feel if another woman was flirting or coming onto you? Would she be bothered ?
Sexless Marriages
- Thread starter PornStache75
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Just out of interest how would she feel if another woman was flirting or coming onto you? Would she be bothered ?
AnnieLit
Literotica Guru
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Given kids, schools, etc.? Of course she will be bothered! Only it might have nothing to do with sex.
I'm finding myself nearly in this club as well, with sex occuring maybe once every 2 to 3 months. I've been told that early 30s are peak ages for women's sexuality, but my wife has lost nearly all drive/interest.
It's hard, because I am a very sexual person...
It's hard, because I am a very sexual person...
Rescuemepls
Virgin
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- Aug 26, 2019
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Almost 7 years without...
So I am a 39 year old woman with, what feels like, the sex drive of a teenage boy! I’ve been in a relationship for the past 13-14 years and it’s been pretty dry/dead. I can’t take it anymore. I keep picturing myself dying without ever being touched again... and it makes me die a little inside.
So I am a 39 year old woman with, what feels like, the sex drive of a teenage boy! I’ve been in a relationship for the past 13-14 years and it’s been pretty dry/dead. I can’t take it anymore. I keep picturing myself dying without ever being touched again... and it makes me die a little inside.
madmatt618
Really Experienced
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That sucks...
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The_Hype
Really Experienced
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- Jul 31, 2015
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Been about one boring encounter per month for the last, I don't know how many, years.
G
guns444
Guest
Count me into this group. I guess I can't say sexless per say but once or twice a month, and when it happens it's the most Camille of the vanilla
skirt_chaser
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Last edited:
skirt_chaser
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So I am a 39 year old woman with, what feels like, the sex drive of a teenage boy! I’ve been in a relationship for the past 13-14 years and it’s been pretty dry/dead. I can’t take it anymore. I keep picturing myself dying without ever being touched again... and it makes me die a little inside.
I'm feeling the same and it sucks. Missing a touch and any intimacy. Feel empty inside.
Lost_Yonder
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When the sex stops couples drift apart.
Actually, that is not necessarily true. It has been years since my wife and I have had sex, but we actually have a very strong relationship. It is more like extremely close friends than lovers, but we still cuddle and hug, etc., just no kissing, no sex...
Juicielips
Virgin
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- May 30, 2017
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I guess I am a part of this club. I don't want to admit it, but my husband seems to find all his sexual needs online, talking to women around the world. I am trying to understand and come to terms with this but it hurts and we can't seem to talk about it. He seems satisfied with the least amount of physical contact with me and it doesn't seem to bother him if I am hurting or not. I don't think I want to elaborate anymore at this time, but if there are anyone who wants to.chat with me please don't hesitate to do so.
smtst5
Tequila guy
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Sorry to hear of your situation. You might want to turn on PMs if you want others to contact you.
Hubby is complete rubbish, in my view. Why does he think he is living with you? Doing dishes?
B
Beachaged
Guest
So if this is a club I’m part of how do I meet the other members. We need some sort of identification like we all get the same tatoo. This way the next time a woman bangs her cart into mine at Stop & Shop I know whether this was an accident or a signal from another club member. I’m open to ideas but there needs to be a way.
tedsbeds
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So you smile wait for the return smile and then start talking. If they are not interested, they'll run away
B
Beachaged
Guest
So how soon in the conversation do you bring up the sexless marriage? This is uncharted territory for me. i usually turn my cart and walk away.
Spiritedlady
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This is a tricky one because lots of us are online because we’re not getting our needs met at home. So, not knowing you or your situation and having no desire to hurt your feelings I can say that the men I have talked to have said the following in relation to their relationships with their significant others:
1). Their partner has no desire for sex
2) sex with their partner is infrequent ( differing sex drives)
3) Sex with their partner is too boring or vanilla
4) Sex with their partner lacks intensity
5) Partner is opposed to a particular kink or fetish
6)Man desires variety ( irrespective of partners thoughts on sex)
7) Man loves but no longer sexually desire partner ( friends zone)
8) Man does not love nor desire partner but cannot leave for practical reasons ( finance)
I imagine women’s lists are similar but I don’t chat with them much so cannot confirm that. What I would say is that we are all involved in the dynamics of these situations and are not all 100% blameless in creating these difficulties. People don’t see or don’t wish to acknowledge they are somewhat part of the problem and find it easier to place the blame totally at the feet of their partners. That is not directed at anyone in particular just a general observation.
I think you’ve summed up every reason I’ve ever come across on my years of using Lit as to reasons for a sexless marriage. Like you say it’s often not just one person who contributes but both parties involved, quite often the problem being lack of communication between people.
I know I’ve spoken to a lot of people who just haven’t tried to tell their partner how they feel and the desires they have.
I finally started going to the gym I joined last month. Today was my 2nd visit where I did work out. (I kept at it for just an hour, and at a lower intensity than I thought was good, but better to start off slow/bored than to jump in and get hurt!)
My wife's desire dropped (imho) from a medical problem. She went on a birth control med that kept her bleeding at least enough to stain any clothes without protection for 10 months. When she came off it, her sex drive was gone. Now it seems to check back in with her every 4 months or so. If this change hadn't happened, I would still be getting enough exercise to stay fit, just from sex.
We've been talking, lately. (I even told her about posting here) She gave me permission to get blow-jobs from others, but I've never been that big a fan and have always seen oral as foreplay, rather than a goal. I've gained 80 lbs since we stopped having regular sex, and my own libido is lower as a result. One of the worries I have about going to a gym is that losing this gut will wake my drive back up.
My wife's desire dropped (imho) from a medical problem. She went on a birth control med that kept her bleeding at least enough to stain any clothes without protection for 10 months. When she came off it, her sex drive was gone. Now it seems to check back in with her every 4 months or so. If this change hadn't happened, I would still be getting enough exercise to stay fit, just from sex.
We've been talking, lately. (I even told her about posting here) She gave me permission to get blow-jobs from others, but I've never been that big a fan and have always seen oral as foreplay, rather than a goal. I've gained 80 lbs since we stopped having regular sex, and my own libido is lower as a result. One of the worries I have about going to a gym is that losing this gut will wake my drive back up.
Aussie_Teacher
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- Dec 7, 2004
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My problem is she has a much bigger sex drive than me but devote all her time and sexual energy to getting it from other guys and can't be bothered even trying to see if i am interested.
Rt127
Virgin
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Pliantjoed
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- Aug 27, 2019
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Yes she would/does get bothered. Even if I am talking with another woman she knows about something as simple as mowing the grass I get the third degree about it. But that does not translate into passion for sex unfortunately...
Littlemanintheboat
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- Sep 7, 2016
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I've been lurking on this thread for ages and finally decided to post. 43 year old married male getting tired of the cycle of better communication, some kissing and cuddling, leading to nothing more and falling back into a shell to protect myself.
We are on night 4 of no kids and nothing.
I had a sleepless night last night going back and forth between should I just "take care of this myself" or hold off and maybe tomorrow it will be on. I could beg and whine, but, I want someone who wants me or at least want sex enough to think I'm a good option, not a human fleshlight.
One confusing issue is that of the 5-10 times a year 1 or 2 of them is really good and she comes more than half the time (not a great average, but, I dont get to practice much). Faking to stroke my ego is not her style.
Feeling beaten down and having a hard time keeping hope that it will get better. I've tried talking about it but I keep running into walls that she puts up. I probably own some of that. Not ready to step out yet, but, some one to chat with would be nice.
Never actually put this in writing before. Maybe it will help.
We are on night 4 of no kids and nothing.
I had a sleepless night last night going back and forth between should I just "take care of this myself" or hold off and maybe tomorrow it will be on. I could beg and whine, but, I want someone who wants me or at least want sex enough to think I'm a good option, not a human fleshlight.
One confusing issue is that of the 5-10 times a year 1 or 2 of them is really good and she comes more than half the time (not a great average, but, I dont get to practice much). Faking to stroke my ego is not her style.
Feeling beaten down and having a hard time keeping hope that it will get better. I've tried talking about it but I keep running into walls that she puts up. I probably own some of that. Not ready to step out yet, but, some one to chat with would be nice.
Never actually put this in writing before. Maybe it will help.
