Post baseless lies about the person above you - Version Four

[JJonah]

Some of her very best days have been spent buried neck-deep in sand.

 

[Gamine67]

Some of her very best days have been spent buried neck-deep in sand.

Thinks the denominator is suppose to tie up the numerator.

 

[JJonah]

Thinks the denominator is suppose to tie up the numerator.

Secretly has no clue what a numerator is, but is afraid to admit it to people.

 

[Violetvixen1]

Secretly has no clue what a numerator is, but is afraid to admit it to people.

Drinks wine coolers cause he can’t handle beer

 

[JJonah]

Drinks wine coolers cause he can’t handle beer

Drinks Boone's Farm cause she can't handle wine coolers.

 

[Violetvixen1]

Drinks Boone's Farm cause she can't handle wine coolers.

Once took a sip of my whiskey and fell down stone cold drunk

 

[man_at_arms]

Once took a sip of my whiskey and fell down stone cold drunk

Once charged me for phone sex and fell asleep on the phone!

 

[Violetvixen1]

Once charged me for phone sex and fell asleep on the phone!

Once called for phone sex and bored me so badly I fell asleep

 

[gentold]

Once called for phone sex and bored me so badly I fell asleep

loves to be in bed with men whose organs are painted violet hence the name

 

[Taegul]

He masturbates after handling the axe because it feels better with splinters.

 

[JerseyJade]

He masturbates after handling the axe because it feels better with splinters.

He has some weird looking friends.

 

[Taegul]

He has some weird looking friends.

She wants to be featured in Jay Leno's Garage as his newest and most expensive ride.

 

[gentold]

She wants to be featured in Jay Leno's Garage as his newest and most expensive ride.

stiff lip

 

[Sweet_Lara]

stiff lip

Loves to impress the ladies with his firm grip on his hard ax

 

[gentold]

Loves to impress the ladies with his firm grip on his hard ax

dips her fingers in the tea , making it sweet

 

[Sweet_Lara]

dips her fingers in the tea , making it sweet

Woke up one morning and was dismayed to see the vernal pool had disappeared along with his beachball

 

[JJonah]

Woke up one morning and was dismayed to see the vernal pool had disappeared along with his beachball

Had to keep correcting her spellcheck, which thought she meant “dis maid.”

 

[Violetvixen1]

Had to keep correcting her spellcheck, which thought she meant “dis maid.”

He’s a selfish bastard who refuses to share his whiskey

 

[The_Fool]

He’s a selfish bastard who refuses to share his whiskey

I heard she set fire to the still when she was trying to flame her farts.

 

[lovetopleasewomen]

He’s a selfish bastard who refuses to share his whiskey

Looking to start a Go-Fund-Me page to help open a halfway house for wayward nymphos.

 

[gentold]

Woke up one morning and was dismayed to see the vernal pool had disappeared along with his beachball

Sleeps all day

 

[DeckardNYC]

Sleeps all day

Never sleeps due to the high level of steroids.

 

[JJonah]

Never sleeps due to the high level of steroids.

Only counts analog sheep, never digital.

 

[alwaysaway]

Only counts analog sheep, never digital.

Puts on his best David Attenborough voice and narrates what strangers are doing in public.

 

[Davesmith42]

Puts on his best David Attenborough voice and narrates what strangers are doing in public.

Wears big rubber boots in the rain....