The Isolated Blurt Thread XVII : Squish Me Like You Mean It!

[jaF0]

I've been trying to grow a proper Parsnip for years.

Ain't no such a thing. They should be outlawed.

 

[pink]

Switch to LEDs

These were free.

 

[Luk]

I started adding extra pistachios when I get ice cream. The salted ones are perfect in it.

You had me at salted.

 

[pantalaimonlyra]

Salted nuts taste best.

 

[butters]

I'm thinking about bacon wrapped parsnips and carrots on the grill.

We are doing a Cuban Pork Loin with some coconut rice and a radish salad tonight, but a wee starter of bacon wrapped oysters done on a super hot grill, my daughter’s new favourite oyster dish, will start things off. They take just a few minutes, while the loin is resting.

I gotta say, she is becoming a pretty good shucker too.

i've never had cooked oysters before, but bacon-wrapped oysters sounds delicious!

 

[gotsnowgotslush]

Victoria's Secrets

Anything new, for Christmas ?

 

[adrina]

It's a really good night for a nice hot bubble bath.

 

[gotsnowgotslush]

No backsides, as of yet.

Very modest, not cheeky.

 

[toeskr]

Beew accidentally outing his own 123o1 alt might be the funniest thing I've seen here all year.

Posting your third tiny tit on your neck has to be runner up.

 

[nowisthetime]

WTF Steelers stop fucking up with the penalties!

 

[CandiCame]

I thought I'd try to do calorie restriction for a little bit because I'm a lazy shit and I hate exercise, but it's midnight and I'm fucking starving and I'm about to get half a pan of lasagna by myself and just dare anyone to call attention to it.

It's not even good lasagna, it's just there and I'm so fucking hungry.

 

[butters]

must be almost time to go outside and gather the flora for this year's wreath. i was super happy with last year's one, and all from the pasture and gardens.

 

[toeskr]

must be almost time to go outside and gather the flora for this year's wreath. i was super happy with last year's one, and all from the pasture and gardens.

Moooo.

 

[dolf]

I thought I'd try to do calorie restriction for a little bit because I'm a lazy shit and I hate exercise, but it's midnight and I'm fucking starving and I'm about to get half a pan of lasagna by myself and just dare anyone to call attention to it.

It's not even good lasagna, it's just there and I'm so fucking hungry.

just accept it. You'll end up chubby.
Be at one with your jiggly bits!

I put my ape on a brutal diet. He's looking pretty fucking good, and getting even better. Perhaps what you lack is a partner who bullies you mercilessly

 

[CandiCame]

just accept it. You'll end up chubby.
Be at one with your jiggly bits!

I put my ape on a brutal diet. He's looking pretty fucking good, and getting even better. Perhaps what you lack is a partner who bullies you mercilessly

Oh, no, I have that, the plan was to wait until she went to bed and deal with the fallout in the morning.

I did eat it. I ate all of it.

My bf is on the other side of that spectrum. You date a big mountain bear like that because you know you're gonna eat. He just produces hot wings from the aether somehow.

And I have literally 0 willpower so he buys me candy by the bag and I just fucking eat it. I don't look like a fat pig only because I force myself to exercise. Because I can eat like... 5000kcal in a day accidentally. I don't stop. I just... I can't. I don't know how people figure out when they have had enough food. I don't get sick from it, either. I thought that was a myth.

If I let myself I'd be HUGE, like my dad. I think I have a genetic predisposition to not stop eating, so I actually went to doctors and shit, thinking it was a thyroid disorder, but they couldn't find anything. They were basically like, "Well one, you're probably hungry because you're underweight on the charts so have you tried just being a fatass? And for 2, you might just be fat."

So I left and told my therapist and she said that I had an oral fixation, which makes sense because I do ALWAYS have to have something in my mouth or I get real twitchy. It's not always food, but if it's not food then I'm chainsmoking or chewing on pencils or something. I bite the little snappy things off pens and have eaten more of them than I am comfortable admitting.

My brother does that too. We just eat inanimate objects all the time. Probably not great but we're not dead, so eh.

I was gonna blurt about how I was supposed to clean if I couldn't sleep tonight yet had not done that. I need to do that. I promised I'd clean the bathroom. And maybe fix the sink. The sink is a pipe dream and everyone needs to accept that. We wash our hands in the bathtub like men. The new sink will sit there, next to the broken sink, until the end of time. It is now an aesthetic fixture in the bathroom.

Edit: This guy gets me
https://i.imgur.com/L6NkEtz.gif?noredirect

 

[Froya]

I did eat it. I ate all of it.

Thank you for being you.

 

[Saint Peter]

Keep your meathooks off of my food!

 

[Saint Peter]

Maybe I will nibble on Froya a little bit.





Just to take the edge off.

 

[Froya]

Maybe I will nibble on Froya a little bit.

Just to take the edge off.

I would be agreeable to that. Which edge would you like to start with?

 

[oO00Oo]

Female impersonators hunting, "Eww!" types of attitudes.
You boys and girls act as if everybody wants to get into your parts.

Female impersonators are the worst, they should all be set on fire.

 

[Que]

u projecting bro?

and spell tweaker correctly, you don't want your daughter to learn the wrong way to spell "dad's" profession.

Que'sDaughter'sRealFather

u seem mad, bro.

 

[Luk]

Moommmmm!!!!!!! Luk's being mean to me again!!!!!!

 

[Que]

Moommmmm!!!!!!! Luk's being mean to me again!!!!!!

That's you being mean? I thought that was just you displaying your lack of character.

 

[HarryHill]

Oh, he's a character all right

 

[Luk]

That's you being mean? I thought that was just you displaying your lack of character.

Everyone knows I'm an asshole to shitty human beings so bringing it here just makes you look like.... you.