Nothing to see here, Justa bit of Florida sunshine with a chance of hurricane.

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You are fun, sweet and gorgeous!
:heart::heart::heart::):heart::heart::heart:

thank you

Nah, crazy is why I like you. And crazy is also why I'm glad there's the internet between us. :D lol, just kidding. I say "crazy" because I'm about the opposite of you and like a quiet, drama free life instead. :D

lol. yeah I sometimes like low drama and quiet too. Usually after I have gone and fucked life up really good and just got done fixing shit, then I like quiet and drama free, until I get bored, then just keep pushing the envelope, until eventually sooner or later I will probably fuck shit up real good, and the rinse and repeat. I am fun like that lol

I'm just crazy and honest enough to admit my life, well part of it, revolves around yours. This thread is the only one I check regularly and I look forward to Saturday night since I know at least one of us is getting laid, lol.

Well I dont know how this saturday is looking, hubby is being a real dick last night and today, we shall see, but I don't know, I think by Saturday I might be real tired of putting up with his shit lol.

Another great story of your life. Some of the risks we take can add such a wonderful rush to our normal lives. Sometimes getting caught can be fun too as long as things don't go bad.

What would you have done it the elevator stopped and the doors opened to someone seeing you on the act?

well thanks. honestly, I just would have said something like "whoops, sorry" and walked away giggling.

Hotel's don't want to call police, so will overlook just about anything, it is a pain in the ass. Having worked nights in a hotel, I have seen some shit, and I can say I only called police once and that is because the 2 guys who kept threatening each other kept telling me to. Though it was my first good experience with cops. By the time they got there, of course the guys changed their mind, as I had tried to make sure they wouldn't before I called ugh. So I just served the cops coffee and danish, still had to do a report though. One cop kept coming back a lot, I'd get out coffee and breakfast, we would chit chat and watch tv until he got a call, or morning was coming around. It was a good experience as I had become accustomed to viewing police as the enemy so to actually mingle with a normal non douchey person in uniform was good. I still never called for any other issues though, again who wants to deal with the reports.
 
Do tell, please?
well that and my ass sound like the topics for todays rambling

I have faith in your abilities.
Well thanks. I will even link my ass to hotel craziness, hum, can I do it in 3 ways?

My god...what a body!!! :devil::devil:

thank you

Nice cube pictures. Are you wearing a pink thong for thong Thursday?

thank you. and I am, it is a pretty cute pink thong too.
 
Are those contumelious escapades of yours occurring in your work place? and if they are, are you in danger of being caught, or don't you care?
They are very sexy but would not wish to see you getting caught.
 
Yep #bestemployeeever and #bestcubepics.....wait hows #cubeboobs sound?

Justa you sexy sweet crazy bitch my thanks for this thread that's erotic and fun as hell to follow.
So want to bite that ass of yours , in a fun way not that silence of the lambs bathsalt way ,just sayin:nana:
 
so todays rambling, hotel craziness and my ass.

first sex in the woods equals mosquito bites on my ass, just fyi. not as cool of an idea as I thought.

My closest girlfriends when younger had a lot of close contact with my ass, as I did with theirs. Girls are often close and run around in their underwear together a lot, give opinions, go into fitting rooms with you and such. plus there was the "obscene jeans" of the 90s. worn, damaged, showing just enough ass but not too much. We got that look with our friends. distressing the ass of jeans, cutting and fraying in just the perfect spots. We made a day of it getting a new pair of jeans ready for all the girls.

Craziness in hotels. Well I had the distinction of living in the really skanky one, while working in the nicer one a few blocks away. I had actually saw a help wanted sign in the skanky one, and gave them a resume, but the fact that I had a resume, no visible tattoos or piercings, was literate, he said his brother and wife were looking for someone for their hotel too and told me to go see them. Thus I got a weekly rate at the place I could afford but worked in the nicer. Now the place I could afford, well it was bad. there was the group of hookers, I only remember Butter and Barbie, I used to Skanky hotel, there was a stabbing or 2. couples fighting, lots of craziness etc etc. Nice hotel, the only violence was those two drunk guys threatening to beat the crap out of each other for like half an hour, but not a punch or shove.

As an employee, you of course see sex in the hot tub, pool, and elevator. Honestly, I am guilty of all that too...yes my bare ass has been against a lot of hotel surfaces (see working my ass into the ramblings). As a lone chick working 3rd shift in a hotel, there is also the standard crap. ya know, the occasional man who calls the desk and asks you to bring more towels, a menu for local restaurant, whatever and answer the door naked. Now, I am a trooper so I don't bat an eyelash. Worst was the cork screw guy, asked me to bring a corkscrew up, answered naked, then asked me to come in and show him how to work the AC, then the TV, purposely just doing his best to waste my time. There was also the lady with the "service" purse dog who threw a complete fucking fit and had a total meltdown because I didn't want to put her and her dog in a no pet room. Not refusing to give her a room, but she wanted a room that I could guarantee had never had an animal in. thought I might need to call her an ambulance.

one of my funnier mistakes, ok when you live at a hotel and work at one close by for a long time, you get used to regulars knowing you, even though you don't remember them from Adam. I just play it off like I remember people, converse, and use what they give me in the conversation. So one night I just got off shift, and was back at the hotel I lived in, walking back to my room. This man, with very poor English skills, asks me if I was working. I assumed I know him and just don't know him. So I answer, no I just got done. At which point he tries to give me money and get me to follow him. yup, I just told a man looking for a hooker that I just finished with a man. So, I am trying to explain the whole not a hooker thing, live there, work the front desk, yada yada. Except he doesn't speak English enough to understand me. tried pointing to the section on the back of the hotel where you can find the hookers, doesn't get it. finally I just get my ass back in my room (see my ass). man must have spent 2 hours outside my room. life lesson learned though, be very careful about how you answer someone when they ask "are you working?"

my personal weirdest night wasn't anything super unusually, it was more the quantity. Ok first there was an amway meeting in our meeting room. never get stuck talking with amway people, or any mlm people, just trust me. So I am doing my best to look really fucking busy. Decide to take crap to the outbuilding, where I interrupt some strange man jacking off. ok my bad, I never go out there. get rid of my amway people, lock the doors. I am playing on the computer, which is by the window, man knocks on my window, I look up...different strange man, jacking off. roll my eyes, go back to my game, watch some tv. ok 5am, time to unlock the lobby and set up breakfast and shit, then balance the rooms and register. I got breakfast set, then a man comes into the lobby. I do the normal greet him, ask how his night was, tell him to help himself etc. then I start working counting the register. He got coffee and sat on one of the couches, I assumed to watch some tv with coffee. As I am counting, he asks "mind if I do this here?" I assume he is doing that thing where they basically set up a full office sprawled across the couch and the coffee table. Nope, yeah he is jacking off. So by this point all I can do is laugh, roll my eyes, and politely explain that I can not having him doing that there as it might offend any other guests who come down. So yes, that is my personal weirdest night, as 3 random weenie waggers in one night is just bizarre. Normally, random indecent exposure by strange men was like once every 3 months or so. Also, what is the point of drawing my attention to it? Am i expected to ask if I could assist? Am I expected to be shocked and afraid because it is just soooo big? Is the laugh and eyeroll not the correct answer?

And finally, while working at the hotel, I did use the copier to photocopy my ass, because I could.
 
so todays rambling, hotel craziness and my ass.

first sex in the woods equals mosquito bites on my ass, just fyi. not as cool of an idea as I thought.

My closest girlfriends when younger had a lot of close contact with my ass, as I did with theirs. Girls are often close and run around in their underwear together a lot, give opinions, go into fitting rooms with you and such. plus there was the "obscene jeans" of the 90s. worn, damaged, showing just enough ass but not too much. We got that look with our friends. distressing the ass of jeans, cutting and fraying in just the perfect spots. We made a day of it getting a new pair of jeans ready for all the girls.

Craziness in hotels. Well I had the distinction of living in the really skanky one, while working in the nicer one a few blocks away. I had actually saw a help wanted sign in the skanky one, and gave them a resume, but the fact that I had a resume, no visible tattoos or piercings, was literate, he said his brother and wife were looking for someone for their hotel too and told me to go see them. Thus I got a weekly rate at the place I could afford but worked in the nicer. Now the place I could afford, well it was bad. there was the group of hookers, I only remember Butter and Barbie, I used to Skanky hotel, there was a stabbing or 2. couples fighting, lots of craziness etc etc. Nice hotel, the only violence was those two drunk guys threatening to beat the crap out of each other for like half an hour, but not a punch or shove.

As an employee, you of course see sex in the hot tub, pool, and elevator. Honestly, I am guilty of all that too...yes my bare ass has been against a lot of hotel surfaces (see working my ass into the ramblings). As a lone chick working 3rd shift in a hotel, there is also the standard crap. ya know, the occasional man who calls the desk and asks you to bring more towels, a menu for local restaurant, whatever and answer the door naked. Now, I am a trooper so I don't bat an eyelash. Worst was the cork screw guy, asked me to bring a corkscrew up, answered naked, then asked me to come in and show him how to work the AC, then the TV, purposely just doing his best to waste my time. There was also the lady with the "service" purse dog who threw a complete fucking fit and had a total meltdown because I didn't want to put her and her dog in a no pet room. Not refusing to give her a room, but she wanted a room that I could guarantee had never had an animal in. thought I might need to call her an ambulance.

one of my funnier mistakes, ok when you live at a hotel and work at one close by for a long time, you get used to regulars knowing you, even though you don't remember them from Adam. I just play it off like I remember people, converse, and use what they give me in the conversation. So one night I just got off shift, and was back at the hotel I lived in, walking back to my room. This man, with very poor English skills, asks me if I was working. I assumed I know him and just don't know him. So I answer, no I just got done. At which point he tries to give me money and get me to follow him. yup, I just told a man looking for a hooker that I just finished with a man. So, I am trying to explain the whole not a hooker thing, live there, work the front desk, yada yada. Except he doesn't speak English enough to understand me. tried pointing to the section on the back of the hotel where you can find the hookers, doesn't get it. finally I just get my ass back in my room (see my ass). man must have spent 2 hours outside my room. life lesson learned though, be very careful about how you answer someone when they ask "are you working?"

my personal weirdest night wasn't anything super unusually, it was more the quantity. Ok first there was an amway meeting in our meeting room. never get stuck talking with amway people, or any mlm people, just trust me. So I am doing my best to look really fucking busy. Decide to take crap to the outbuilding, where I interrupt some strange man jacking off. ok my bad, I never go out there. get rid of my amway people, lock the doors. I am playing on the computer, which is by the window, man knocks on my window, I look up...different strange man, jacking off. roll my eyes, go back to my game, watch some tv. ok 5am, time to unlock the lobby and set up breakfast and shit, then balance the rooms and register. I got breakfast set, then a man comes into the lobby. I do the normal greet him, ask how his night was, tell him to help himself etc. then I start working counting the register. He got coffee and sat on one of the couches, I assumed to watch some tv with coffee. As I am counting, he asks "mind if I do this here?" I assume he is doing that thing where they basically set up a full office sprawled across the couch and the coffee table. Nope, yeah he is jacking off. So by this point all I can do is laugh, roll my eyes, and politely explain that I can not having him doing that there as it might offend any other guests who come down. So yes, that is my personal weirdest night, as 3 random weenie waggers in one night is just bizarre. Normally, random indecent exposure by strange men was like once every 3 months or so. Also, what is the point of drawing my attention to it? Am i expected to ask if I could assist? Am I expected to be shocked and afraid because it is just soooo big? Is the laugh and eyeroll not the correct answer?

And finally, while working at the hotel, I did use the copier to photocopy my ass, because I could.


FOFLMFAO OMG you are too damn funny! Love your tales! What a life!:devil:
 
Three degrees of ass separation?

lol. it is three degrees for my tits (because it is a small world when you have big tits) but six degrees for my ass.

Are those contumelious escapades of yours occurring in your work place? and if they are, are you in danger of being caught, or don't you care?
They are very sexy but would not wish to see you getting caught.

haha, you just realized almost all my pictures are in a fairly busy office? Yes there is of course some danger to being caught, however, in all honesty, it is a very calculated risk. I listen to my surroundings, know peoples basic schedules and tendencies. Not as risky as it seems. Do I care, yeah I do to a degree. Though I do have to say it would be fucking funny if I was caught and seeing what I come up with to cover it, if I even need to. I do all sorts of silly workplace antics, and many people are accustomed to it, so yeah it might just be a laugh, eyeroll, and do I even want to know what the fuck you are doing? Others have seen me taking a clothed selfie of my butt. Jose our delivery guy has seen that twice while bringing me my deliveries. I like him, he always brings me chocolate too. Someone has seen another chicks tits on my computer screen, they just laughed

Yep #bestemployeeever and #bestcubepics.....wait hows #cubeboobs sound?

Justa you sexy sweet crazy bitch my thanks for this thread that's erotic and fun as hell to follow.
So want to bite that ass of yours , in a fun way not that silence of the lambs bathsalt way ,just sayin:nana:

hahaha. yeah you do have to specify the kind of biting here in florida lol and you are quite welcome.
 
You seem to have it all down to a science. Oh and nicely done working your ass into your ramblings. Have to try and figure out how to get it on my face now. Wow, there went my subtlety for the day....
 
In all my 84 years on this planet I have not come across anyone quite like you, great sense of humour and love your stories.
 
Dollie

Far from the Florida sunshine and east coast nude beaches.

We've been off the internet way too much lately. I think I went back and got caught up on your fun times. No, I'm not a lesbian. Maybe you will remember us. We spent 22 years up close to the Suwannee River in the woods of Florida. I thought I knew a lot and had a wild life before we retired. But rednecks and retired lonely old men taught me a lot more.
I've been very lucky to have the same loving sex crazy husband over 59 years. Sadly he can't get it up anymore. In fact it keeps shrinking but I love him. At my age I still get more sex than the average middle aged woman. Like you, I dress to attract men. I'm far from as sexy and pretty as you now. But little boys and men in wheel chairs love titties.

Here's what Im commenting on.............. Well that is really awesome, but I don't know how typical. I mean, almost half of all marriages end in divorce, so clearly almost half are really sick of just being around their spouse. And then there are places like here where if I believed every man who sent me PMs when I was new, it is all completely sexless marriages of convenience lol (is that what lit men think I am looking for, hell I want to hear about those with more exciting lives than mine, not less)

Since I don't always remember things my husband said for you to check out some of our stories to see that you have replaced me as the young sex tit showing woman. It's been a fun life with my husband and friends. It really was and still is exciting.
We'll keep reading your crazy stories and hubby will stare at your boobs.
We sure miss Florida for many reasons.
 
FOFLMFAO OMG you are too damn funny! Love your tales! What a life!:devil:

Well life really made it easy for tales. First we have growing up in the city that has won annual awards such as "poorest city in america" "highest drop out rate in the country" "most ghetto city in america" and "most crime per square block"

then I move on to one of the biggest cities in america and regular ride marta.

then weeks in random places based on articles I read

then the home of always in the top 20, occasionally number one party school in america

And finally east bumblefuck redneck florida, which lets be real, that just hands you funny shit.

so yeah, my environment pretty much just handed out screwed up, funny shit.

You seem to have it all down to a science. Oh and nicely done working your ass into your ramblings. Have to try and figure out how to get it on my face now. Wow, there went my subtlety for the day....

thank you. generally that is an ask nicely or not so nicely thing. subtlety is overrated.

In all my 84 years on this planet I have not come across anyone quite like you, great sense of humour and love your stories.

haha, well in my 39 years I don't think I had come across an someone who was 84 and frequented an adult site (or maybe I have and just never would have guessed)

Far from the Florida sunshine and east coast nude beaches.

We've been off the internet way too much lately. I think I went back and got caught up on your fun times. No, I'm not a lesbian. Maybe you will remember us. We spent 22 years up close to the Suwannee River in the woods of Florida. I thought I knew a lot and had a wild life before we retired. But rednecks and retired lonely old men taught me a lot more.
I've been very lucky to have the same loving sex crazy husband over 59 years. Sadly he can't get it up anymore. In fact it keeps shrinking but I love him. At my age I still get more sex than the average middle aged woman. Like you, I dress to attract men. I'm far from as sexy and pretty as you now. But little boys and men in wheel chairs love titties.

Here's what Im commenting on.............. Well that is really awesome, but I don't know how typical. I mean, almost half of all marriages end in divorce, so clearly almost half are really sick of just being around their spouse. And then there are places like here where if I believed every man who sent me PMs when I was new, it is all completely sexless marriages of convenience lol (is that what lit men think I am looking for, hell I want to hear about those with more exciting lives than mine, not less)

Since I don't always remember things my husband said for you to check out some of our stories to see that you have replaced me as the young sex tit showing woman. It's been a fun life with my husband and friends. It really was and still is exciting.
We'll keep reading your crazy stories and hubby will stare at your boobs.
We sure miss Florida for many reasons.

I very much remember you. And I totally bet your grandkids say "omg grandma" often ;) yeah I hear that whole shrinking thing happens with age and water. and OMG, yeah you all have a fuck ton of awesome stories I am sure, thus I am sure have written some pretty awesome ones too. I should totally check them out. And glad he enjoys staring at my boobs. Yeah so many reasons to enjoy florida, as long as you don't take life too seriously.
 
Be honest you copied your tits too!
Your gf's close contact is the stuff of dirty mens and a few womans fantasies and porno's.:nana:

Mosquitoes, fireants ,aggressive spiders and the maybe rabid skunk,racoon animal have ruined a few heated moments and made a few nurse's giggle or share their own *jellyfish story.
And while tree frogs are harmless their sudden leaps in your face while funny later have caused many a heart attack and oh shit moments with a few dates, its Florida deal with or enjoy shoveling snow.......and now back to the busty object of all our lusty affections :devil:

*For those that don't know what a jellyfish is your lucky and there are a few that are non poisonous or painful but your too busy running,swimming away to risk it but the humor locals get from tourist picking one up on the sand after being told by google its harmless is unmeasurable when they find out google was wrong.*
 
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Is your office hiring?

usually

Be honest you copied your tits too!
Your gf's close contact is the stuff of dirty mens and a few womans fantasies and porno's.:nana:

Mosquitoes, fireants ,aggressive spiders and the maybe rabid skunk,racoon animal have ruined a few heated moments and made a few nurse's giggle or share their own *jellyfish story.
And while tree frogs are harmless their sudden leaps in your face while funny later have caused many a heart attack and oh shit moments with a few dates, its Florida deal with or enjoy shoveling snow.......and now back to the busty object of all our lusty affections :devil:

*For those that don't know what a jellyfish is your lucky and there are a few that are non poisonous or painful but your too busy running,swimming away to risk it but the humor locals get from tourist picking one up on the sand after being told by google its harmless is unmeasurable when they find out google was wrong.*

oh of course I photocopied my tits. yeah someone rubbing a steel brush against your ass may not quite be what you'd expect. haha, treefrogs, I love little tree frogs. maybe you all will hear them in a summer video

Will keep that in mind. Nice, be nice.

I said ask nice or not so nice

Now that is a view I could enjoy for hours

thank you

Very beautiful smile. .... almost looks like your asking to be spanked or bent over

maybe.
 
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