Depression mental illness uncomfortable pause suicide why don't we talk about it?

[Debbie]

In life shit happens. Sometimes it's good stuff and sometimes life can make you feel like a dung beetle pushing your little ball of shit up a steep hill but just as you get to the top disaster happens and your ball of poop rolls all the way back down the hill.


http://www.nzherald.co.nz/opinion/news/article.cfm?c_id=466&objectid=11804539

"The topic of suicide not accepted or encouraged by society and for some it's simply unpalatable.

And our men, dying at three times the rate of women, too staunch to talk or too fearful they won't be heard?

We ask, but do we listen?

"How are you?" It rolls of the tongue with ease yet rarely a thought is given to the reply.

We happily accept the stock standard "good", "fine thanks" and "not too bad."

It's what we do. And it's got to change.

It's time we started a conversation, and keep talking."

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Lancecastor]

Let it all out, grrls.

 

[Typo Fu Master]

Men are typically perceived as needing to be strong, and suicide is viewed as weakness. It's also not manly to discuss your feelings.

I believe taking your own life requires a considerable amount of courage.

 

[Tryharder62]

Some mental health issues are situational, but most are actual issues in the brain. I find it fascinating that we used to stigmatized epilepsy until research found what was happening. Some people with bipolar disorder and certain people with schizophrenia use anti -seizure medications to stabilize. I truly believe as we research the brain more, one day we will feel so stupid that some thought mental illness was a defect in character. We do need to become more aware of information about mental illness. NAMI - National Alliance of Mental Illness is a great place to look for information and in certain areas support. You are not Alone!

 

[Libsam]

I used to just say "Hi" to strangers in passing, because I thought it was disingenuous to greet people with a "How are you doing".

Then one day a man got upset with me when I didn't return his passing greeting of "How you doing", I just said "Hi". It was a long time ago, but I remember him saying something like, "what, you can't speak to me? Rude!"

Ever since then I say, "How you doing". People respond to it better. It's just a colloquialism.

 

[Greypowerful]

Re: colloquial speech

With good Friends I am honest. If it's a " bleh" day, I share that.

With acquaintances and strangers I stick to convention. Not one to burden others with MY shit.

 

[irksomesauce]

~ cough ~ SUICIDE ~ hint - hint ~ cough ~

 

[hashtag46]

Some mental health issues are situational, but most are actual issues in the brain. I find it fascinating that we used to stigmatized epilepsy until research found what was happening. Some people with bipolar disorder and certain people with schizophrenia use anti -seizure medications to stabilize. I truly believe as we research the brain more, one day we will feel so stupid that some thought mental illness was a defect in character. We do need to become more aware of information about mental illness. NAMI - National Alliance of Mental Illness is a great place to look for information and in certain areas support. You are not Alone!

It would be interesting if we could have as a starting point an accurate comparison of the suicide rates now compared to 50 or 100 years ago.

Even if a proportion of suicides were labelled as accidents or murders in the past and they are more accurately reported now, I suspect that the suicide rates have increased dramatically over the last decades.

That, coupled with improved diagnosis and treatment of mental illness, points to something in the fabric of modern society which makes it much more easy for the vulnerable to become demoralised and despairing.

 

[RobDownSouth]

Okay this one hits a little close to home.

I had lunch yesterday with a former co-worker who was laid off from our previous employer back in November. She's been jobless since.

We talked about how depressing it is to get laid off, and I said I know it's bad and depressing but you're not suicidal....

Bad move.

"Actually, I have thought very seriously about killing myself" she said. Then proceeded to tell me in horrifying detail how she had the whole thing planned out, how she wanted to kill herself, who she wanted to find her body, how she planned on doing it (carbon monoxide poisoning), what people should tell her kids, what she wanted to be buried wearing......everything.

I lost my appetite.

She actually got pissed off when she saw the horrified look on my face. "Oh come on, look me straight in the face and tell me YOU have never considered killing yourself".

Never have, sweetheart. Never once.

 

[~Haze~]

The reason people don't talk about it is that it's one of those subjects that's just a land mine waiting for someone to step on.

If someone mentions it around the wrong person and that person has a history of SI or attempts then that person can feel awkward. Or, the other unfavorable situation is you mention it around someone who lost someone to suicide and again, it becomes awkward.

Or someone says the wrong thing - like the "suicide is a cowards way out" and now, there's almost no hope of having any kind of rational discusssion with a person who has experience with suicide - with either themselves or a loved one.

If you're in a comfortable space/place with people you feel comfortable talking to, that's one thing. But even then, outside of a therapists office, it's hard for people to be open and honest about a very private, dehabilitating illness and the very extreme emotions that come along with it.

It might be possible to get a discussion going here because of the anonymity that we have here but there are still trolls. Also, I place the over/under at the middle of page 3 before someone comes in here with a "suicide fetish". Which, I was surprised to discover was a lot more common than I ever imagined. Mainly with women-believe it or not. (Well idk if it's MAINLY with women or if I just happened to talk to more women/mentally-disturbed-women than men given I'm a guy). But I shouldn't say "mentally disturbed" either considering I suffer from bipolar disorder with pretty extreme cycles. Both manic and depressive.

 

[~Haze~]

Okay this one hits a little close to home.

I had lunch yesterday with a former co-worker who was laid off from our previous employer back in November. She's been jobless since.

We talked about how depressing it is to get laid off, and I said I know it's bad and depressing but you're not suicidal....

Bad move.

"Actually, I have thought very seriously about killing myself" she said. Then proceeded to tell me in horrifying detail how she had the whole thing planned out, how she wanted to kill herself, who she wanted to find her body, how she planned on doing it (carbon monoxide poisoning), what people should tell her kids, what she wanted to be buried wearing......everything.

I lost my appetite.

She actually got pissed off when she saw the horrified look on my face. "Oh come on, look me straight in the face and tell me YOU have never considered killing yourself".

Never have, sweetheart. Never once.

See... exactly.

 

[BotanyBoy]

The only reason I don't is because it freaks people out to talk about death in general much less doing yourself.

http://jpninfo.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/02/seppuku.jpg


I never thought I'd make to this age, shit's kinda depressing.

 

[RobDownSouth]

See... exactly.

I pride myself on being able to talk to anyone about damned near anything.

Suicide is one of the few things I'm very uncomfortable talking about.

 

[4est_4est_Gump]

With good Friends I am honest. If it's a " bleh" day, I share that.

With acquaintances and strangers I stick to convention. Not one to burden others with MY shit.

GET OFF MY LAWN!

TAKE YOUR SHIT WITH YOU!

​

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[4est_4est_Gump]

The only reason I don't is because it freaks people out to talk about death in general much less doing yourself.

...

Talk to me.

I'll help ease you out...

 

[Wild_Honey_66]

Good thread, Debbie. Thank you.

 

[BotanyBoy]

Talk to me.

I'll help ease you out...

LOL

One day....

I kinda wish I had gone down in a shovel fight, get snatched up by a sniper or even an IED.

It's like I won that fight but in doing so I realized I was going to have to off myself someday.

Maybe I'll get hit by a car.

=I

 

[pink]

People who have depression problems are usually marked as being weak.

 

[Hard_Rom]

When people start to talk about killing themselves or threatening to, it is time to take them seriously.

 

[BotanyBoy]

When people start to talk about killing themselves or threatening to, it is time to take them seriously.

Meh...folks who want to are going to, those who don't, wont.

 

[lovetoread]

we cant talk about it

one wrong word to the wrong person and your life is fucked

 

[RobDownSouth]

When people start to talk about killing themselves or threatening to, it is time to take them seriously.

Absolutely agree.

we cant talk about it

one wrong word to the wrong person and your life is fucked

My biggest fear. Walking on eggshells.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]