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Confessions: What Are Yours? Part IV

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Ange1icflowers said:
ICT I had a breakdown in my bathroom last night with the door locked so my kids wouldn't walk in on it. I even (briefly) pondered the thought of suicide. Then I cleaned myself up and went back out and made it through another day.

IACT I did it again tonight because today was harder, and I'm doing it alone. And I feel so freaking alone. And it's going to be a long night. My kid had a seizure and is setting up as if he may have another.

IFCT I hope I can keep this up.
Click to expand...

HUGS, and for what it's worth Prayers too
 
Ange1icflowers said:
ICT I had a breakdown in my bathroom last night with the door locked so my kids wouldn't walk in on it. I even (briefly) pondered the thought of suicide. Then I cleaned myself up and went back out and made it through another day.

IACT I did it again tonight because today was harder, and I'm doing it alone. And I feel so freaking alone. And it's going to be a long night. My kid had a seizure and is setting up as if he may have another.

IFCT I hope I can keep this up.
Click to expand...

Honey, talk it out with someone. ASAP.
If not someone in your real life, someone from here.
Get a sounding board. Whatever you are dealing with, it's not worth ending things over.
Hugs. Be strong love.
"This too shall pass"
 
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I confess that I really don't make the effort that I should, the effort you most certainly deserve, because of (mostly) stupid, petty reasons. And I kinda hate myself for it.
 
ICT that I get into relationships that I know I would end. Why? Well, the other option is being alone. And that's like, sooo uncool..
Also ICT that I'm the cause of most of my own miseries. But accepting it doesn't make dealing with them any easier.
 
Kimikimidoll said:
ICT that I get into relationships that I know I would end. Why? Well, the other option is being alone. And that's like, sooo uncool..
Also ICT that I'm the cause of most of my own miseries. But accepting it doesn't make dealing with them any easier.
Click to expand...

ICT : I have been here as well. It's tough, at this point... I am happy alone. For now.
 
ICT I have had some very nice chats and PM's recently, all very gratifying, but...

IACT I long for something more, to have someone again to say Good Morning and Good Night to while lying next to me in bed
 
ICT it has been a great week for connecting with interesting new people, and reconnecting with some old favorites.

ICT it has been weird receiving PM's again.

IACT when somebody tells me they hope I'm sexy, I know I'm about to disappoint them. Lol. I'm a lot of things, but I don't know about that.
 
ICT I made it through another day. Somehow. Without losing my shit. Somehow. My youngest had 2 seizures last night (epilepsy) and many many hallucinations throughout the night. It was a long fucking night. I forgot to eat today until 5pm. I adulted. A lot. And there's still a lot of adulting left. But I made it. Little one is doing better today.

IACT I wish I wasn't doing all this alone. I wish my husband (who is on travel for work at the moment) didn't brush my stress off like it was bullshit. It's real to me. And I can't just pretend it doesn't exist. But he expects me to. So I journey and struggle alone.

IFCT the person who always helped me in the past is going through his own shit right now and I love him too much to burden him with all of my bullshit. Because I only complicate the shit he's dealing with right now. And I don't want to do that.

And all of this just. Fucking. Sucks.
 
I confess that I'm pretty much a waste of air and resources.
But some of my family still like me.
Or pretend to, anyway.
 
I'll confess to nothing. If you want information you're going to have to torture it out of me.
 
ICT I made it through another day. And I stole time for me. I took myself out for some Thai food away from the kids. And took a nap. And a shower. And I feel guilty about it (well except the shower.)

IACT I work from 8-2:30 tomorrow and I really don't want to. At all.
 
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