adult theatre/ swinger club etiquette

[Pretty_kitty169]

So, a bit of background and then the question. We visited an adult theatre which has a couples only area. We was sitting on couch with other couples around us, I undid my husband's pants and went down on him. As we did our thing another couple sat next to us and the women spread her legs as the man played with her so that we had clear view. We are pretty new to this and wasn't sure if we should uhhh, try talking to them? Or was this maybe some sort of invite? We have also visited a club, is there secret signals that people are interested? I am sure we could have more fun if we was a little more foward, but also don't want to be pushy. Any advice would be appreciated

 

[mnbreastluver]

I would love to hear the answers to this one though all the theatres have been shut down in my neck of the woods! I was once invited to join in on a couple that wanted to go in a video booth that I didn't act on so I am guessing invited.

 

[NightL]

You could start with a "hello" then maybe "we are new here..."

simple as that really

Genuine compliments will probably work as well

 

[Gwanji16]

Hi, kitty

Yes, talking is the way to get things started. The couple next to you may have signaled interest by going at it next to you, but the best way to take it to the next level is by breaking the ice with some conversation. Were other people going at it as well?

Same with a club. There is no secret code as everyone is there to fuck. Wear some thing sexy and the rest will follow. Have fun and keep us posted!

 

[Pretty_kitty169]

Hi, kitty

Yes, talking is the way to get things started. The couple next to you may have signaled interest by going at it next to you, but the best way to take it to the next level is by breaking the ice with some conversation. Were other people going at it as well?

Same with a club. There is no secret code as everyone is there to fuck. Wear some thing sexy and the rest will follow. Have fun and keep us posted!

Thanks, I guess we are a bit shy. We just don't want to be a creepy couple, we are just a fun couple. Sometimes that can be a fine line

 

[Bluestreak363]

In swinging, permission must be explicit. Never assume. The line between sexy and ruining the moment by overstepping boundaries (yours or theirs) can be razor-thin.

It sounds like they were willing to play, but unless you say something, invite them over, etc... it won't escalate. Well-adjusted and experienced couples won't engage unless you give them the green light. Adult theaters are not the best place to find swingers, either. There are scads of website for swingers. Find one in your area and join the website. Be social. They'll have organized parties periodically. Go to a party. There will be many people who're explicitly there to swing. At that point, all you have to do is set your boundaries with your partner and go into the party... and have fun.

 

[HoldYouDown]

So, a bit of background and then the question. We visited an adult theatre which has a couples only area. We was sitting on couch with other couples around us, I undid my husband's pants and went down on him. As we did our thing another couple sat next to us and the women spread her legs as the man played with her so that we had clear view. We are pretty new to this and wasn't sure if we should uhhh, try talking to them? Or was this maybe some sort of invite? We have also visited a club, is there secret signals that people are interested? I am sure we could have more fun if we was a little more foward, but also don't want to be pushy. Any advice would be appreciated

As it stood you were two couples doing something well within etiquette. If you want interaction, don't be shy to introduce yourself and ask. No will always mean no in a club and is respected by club goers.

A club I went to used a simple tap on the forearm as a sign of interest. I got a few taps I had to turn down that night...what a bummer.

 

[MissJW]

We've participated in play parties that are organised by swingers clubs, but where swingers and exclusive couples are equally welcome.

We are always the kind of couple who go there to have sex in public but don't want to swing. With that said there's never been problems with people who've asked us if we would like to join them or if they can join us. Like someone said, a polite tap and a friendly question is a great way to do it. Even though we always say no, some people have asked if it's still ok to look and I think that's nice of them. We don't mind being watched (which I think is pretty obvious at a play party) yet still those people bother to ask and I really appreciate it.

Sometimes they've put up designated areas for exclusive couples and for swingers, which makes things even easier.

 

[Pretty_kitty169]

In swinging, permission must be explicit. Never assume. The line between sexy and ruining the moment by overstepping boundaries (yours or theirs) can be razor-thin.

It sounds like they were willing to play, but unless you say something, invite them over, etc... it won't escalate. Well-adjusted and experienced couples won't engage unless you give them the green light. Adult theaters are not the best place to find swingers, either. There are scads of website for swingers. Find one in your area and join the website. Be social. They'll have organized parties periodically. Go to a party. There will be many people who're explicitly there to swing. At that point, all you have to do is set your boundaries with your partner and go into the party... and have fun.

Yeah, we just got on 1 of those sites last week. So far it don't seem much better then cl. Send a lot of emails wanting to chat and don't get much back.

 

[Pretty_kitty169]

As it stood you were two couples doing something well within etiquette. If you want interaction, don't be shy to introduce yourself and ask. No will always mean no in a club and is respected by club goers.

A club I went to used a simple tap on the forearm as a sign of interest. I got a few taps I had to turn down that night...what a bummer.

This may be when husband should have just a few drinks to take the edge off. He is a bit shy, but with a couple drinks he is willing to try more

 

[Gwanji16]

Thanks, I guess we are a bit shy. We just don't want to be a creepy couple, we are just a fun couple. Sometimes that can be a fine line

I totally get the fine line, Kitty. In most places like that, no one will think you are creepy if you just try to get a conversation going. Did anyone try to talk to you while you were sucking mr?

 

[NightL]

Thanks, I guess we are a bit shy. We just don't want to be a creepy couple, we are just a fun couple. Sometimes that can be a fine line

Creepy is when one person, often than not male, in a relationship starts grooming with compliments and innuendo someone from another relationship totally oblivious to or without involving the partners into the communication. There is an anxious predatory behaviour which is easy to spot. Just don't do that.

If you are a fun couple, just be your fun selves in your communication - there is nothing creepy or sleazy about that. Just remember the couple you may be interested in have not accidentally walked in off the street. You are not going to offend anyone by being friendly, respectful and polite.

Just start with the idea that you may have fun communication with another couple who have similar desires as yourself. Perhaps you may not play with them, but you may just make friends and through that friendship meet others.

Any couple that attend such an environment for the atmosphere, yet don't play with others, will not be offended if you ask. They will just say "no - not our thing" but you may become great friends.

 

[Leigh81]

We're not interested in an adult theatre but I've checked out links to a couple of "swing clubs" in Toronto. Also not interested in swinging or hooking up with anyone else as were in a triad type relationship with a GF of mine.
This weekend in Toronto is Sexapolooza
http://www.sexapalooza.ca/shows/toronto_2016

I still haven't been to a strip joint whereas my husband has many times. We'll check out the show this weekend & go from there. I think the first time we go to such a club, we'd probably just stay in the bar area or at the most watch others play possibly. I think the furthest I'd be willing to go would be to have sex with my husband in the play area with others around. I'm not really an exhibitionist, but this would be my limit.

L