Nymphomania

[ChattyAnnie]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

 

[BlueEyedFett]

It is a difficult decision, ridding one's self of a problem that brings such pleasure.

 

[flipen]

Sounds like you have your lifestyle under control

 

[SlutAddicted]

We all make mistakes and I am not qualified to judge. But sex and deceit are different things.

You have every right to fuck whom you want. But you don't have the right to deceive your husband (I assume if he was ok with it you wouldn't be trying to hide it). At some point don't you have to recognize that your are stringing him along on a false premise? If you know he would not stay knowing of your infidelity (not incidental but ongoing and with intent to continue) you are robbing him of the opportunity to choose the course of his own life - effectively stealing time from his limited life.

I've chosen to accept a promiscuous wife, but it was my choice to make and nobody else's. And my one explicit condition is that there be no deceit.

Maybe you are the victim of addiction. But that doesn't justify victimizing your husband anymore than the man with an alcohol problem who beats his wife. Yes it is that bad ask any guy who wants a monogamous faithful marriage if he would rather be this husband or take regular beatings. Most would take the beatings.

 

[EctoJohn]

The bigger issue is you hiding it from your husband.
When I opened this thread, I was expecting it to be about a single woman.

Enjoying sex is one thing as long as you're safe about it.
You need to tell your husband, though.
I don't think you're addicted to sex, not to the point of nymphomania,
but the infidelity is a problem.
You seem fully under control of what you're doing, you're just not being honest.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

The bigger issue is you hiding it from your husband.
When I opened this thread, I was expecting it to be about a single woman.

Enjoying sex is one thing as long as you're safe about it.
You need to tell your husband, though.
I don't think you're addicted to sex, not to the point of nymphomania,
but the infidelity is a problem.
You seem fully under control of what you're doing, you're just not being honest.

Infidelity is only a problem if someone gets hurts. I am sure my husband would never except my sexual activities so I am not about to tell him. I don't think I can stop having sex with other men. It's like I have to have it. If I ever get caught, and I don't think I will, then he will be hurt. If I tell him then he will be hurt. I think it's better that he doesn't know. If I could stop I would. That's why I asked the question. Am I a nymphomaniac?

 

[cf23430]

well if your ever in Virginia......raises hand....lol

 

[sidonie45]

Hi Annie.

Is it the addiction to the crave, the desire, the want, the need for something wonderfully different, and then actively seeking out to achieve it? Im right with you with the craving and desire, but I wont actively act upon it.

I don’t know too much about nymphomaniacs, but you are the best one to gauge whether your marriage can stand this if he finds out. Also, if you do undergo treatment, I’m sure it will also change the core essence of who you are, and that change not only affects you, but the person whom your husband fell for.

You know what they say, if symptoms persist, see your doctor. Go seek professional advice Annie.

 

[Bampire]

I think it's a bit of a double-standard that as men, it's acceptable for us to have strong sex drives while for women, it requires some sort of diagnosis. To me, it sounds like you have a strong sex drive. Whether or not your sex drive and appetites are conducive to marriage is a separate question and one to work out with your husband.

 

[EctoJohn]

Infidelity is only a problem if someone gets hurts. I am sure my husband would never except my sexual activities so I am not about to tell him. I don't think I can stop having sex with other men. It's like I have to have it. If I ever get caught, and I don't think I will, then he will be hurt. If I tell him then he will be hurt. I think it's better that he doesn't know. If I could stop I would. That's why I asked the question. Am I a nymphomaniac?

No, I think you WANT to be a nymphomaniac because you're trying to make an excuse for cheating on your husband.

He will find out, he will get hurt (unless he has his own hidden desire to be a cuckold), it's not better that you're lying about it to him, and it'll end badly for both of you.

Do you think it would make it better for him that you were cheating as an "addict" than as a simple woman who refuses to change?

You're not a nympho, you're doing it for jollies, and are loking at us for approval of your excuse which I refuse to give.

If you don't come clean and he finds out anyway, he'll be hurt a lot worse than if you outright admitted it.

But you go have your cake.

 

[ChattyAnnie]

Hi Annie.

Is the addiction to the crave, the desire, the want, the need for something wonderfully different, and then actively seeking out to achieve it? Im right with you with the craving and desire, but I wont actively act upon it.

I don’t know too much about nymphomaniacs, but you are the best one to gauge whether your marriage can stand this if he finds out. Also, if you do undergo treatment, I’m sure it will also change the core essence of who you are, and that change not only affects you, but the person whom your husband fell for.

You know what they say, if symptoms persist, see your doctor. Go seek professional advice Annie.

Very sound advice... and you are so right. I don't want to change. I'm not sure hubby knew he fell for someone so sexually active, but I do think my outgoing and bubbly nature is all part of what he likes about me. He is very conservative in a social sense. Probably why I fell for him. I needed the stability.

 

[screwher]

It's funny but not in a "ha ha" way. Chatty here loves to have sex with multiple partners but knows her hubby would never go for it. Then there's husbands like me out there, and in here, that would love our wives to be half as active.

If you were my wife Chatty, you could do as you will to your heart's content.

 

[readinggp]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

Too bad you didn't have a husband that appreciated your desires.

 

[Ozfetishguy]

Hi Annie.

Is it the addiction to the crave, the desire, the want, the need for something wonderfully different, and then actively seeking out to achieve it? Im right with you with the craving and desire, but I wont actively act upon it.

I don’t know too much about nymphomaniacs, but you are the best one to gauge whether your marriage can stand this if he finds out. Also, if you do undergo treatment, I’m sure it will also change the core essence of who you are, and that change not only affects you, but the person whom your husband fell for.

You know what they say, if symptoms persist, see your doctor. Go seek professional advice Annie.

I agree with sidonie, except for the suggestion to seek professional advice. As you don't want to change, I can't see there's any benefit in getting advice.

I don't understand why some people think that infidelity is so bad. There's far worse things a partner can do than be unfaithful.

 

[anthilly]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

My only opinion is that I feel the same way. I've been accused of being a sex addict, having arousal addiction, and numerous other things. But honestly why is sex so bad. I've always been as safe as I can be, I'm fairly picky with my partners (haven't had one since being married), yes I cheat but there are a lot of reasons and just not having sex is the least of them. If I ever start getting withdrawals from lack of sex, I'll go get help. But until then I'll keep on keeping on.

 

[sidonie45]

I agree with sidonie, except for the suggestion to seek professional advice. As you don't want to change, I can't see there's any benefit in getting advice.

I don't understand why some people think that infidelity is so bad. There's far worse things a partner can do than be unfaithful.

I suggested she seek professional advice, the more options there are for us and the better informed we are the better choices we hope to make.

It seems husband was unaware of the lusty carvings of Annie's nature, so he is unaware of all this, and an innocent player, and Annie cares for him deeply, otherwise she wouldn't care so much of his feelings, or if he found out.

 

[removed9556]

 

[SalliGr]

Raises my Hand.... I think am a Nyphomaniac

Least I think I am...

I love having sex.
I love having HIS cock inside me spilling all of his seed (I wish to have his baby, but fear I cannot give him one)
I love pleasuring him, showing him how much I love and have missed him...

I love my husband, he is the only man I will ever want or need
I love you, Gregorio

 

[SalliGr]

Do you worry about giving a sickness to your husband?

Infidelity is only a problem if someone gets hurts. I am sure my husband would never except my sexual activities so I am not about to tell him. I don't think I can stop having sex with other men. It's like I have to have it. If I ever get caught, and I don't think I will, then he will be hurt. If I tell him then he will be hurt. I think it's better that he doesn't know. If I could stop I would. That's why I asked the question. Am I a nymphomaniac?

Definition from Dictionary.com
Nymphomaniac:a woman who has abnormally excessive and uncontrollable sexual desire.

To me...sex is a wonderful thing and I get soooo much more out of being with my current husband (the man I love and want to stay with for the rest of my life) than I ever did with any other man (even my previous husband, I did not enjoy sex with him after awhile, I felt so bad I told him to go and get a girlfriend)

When you are with the other men, are you protecting yourself from all those God awful diseases out there? It certainly would difficult to explain how he contracted them.... Just please be careful, don't give your husband anything...

 

[LikesToGive]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

The fact of infidelity is not what is being asked about here. Some things get negative labels. Many of these can spin to the positive. It depends on how we choose to look. Enjoying sex is in itself not a bad thing. There are many of us out there who want to be sexually stimulated to the extreme. Definitely not as discussed in the addictive mode when compared with vices such as alcohol and drugs. Not within public settings at least. It is more than okay to think about. I would personally only be worried about the issue in itself if it hinders you from getting through the average day. Then it may be just a bit too much.

 

[SlutAddicted]

Infidelity is only a problem if someone gets hurts. I am sure my husband would never except my sexual activities so I am not about to tell him. I don't think I can stop having sex with other men. It's like I have to have it. If I ever get caught, and I don't think I will, then he will be hurt. If I tell him then he will be hurt. I think it's better that he doesn't know. If I could stop I would. That's why I asked the question. Am I a nymphomaniac?

Ah yes "what he doesn't know won't hurt him" the great bastion of denial for selfish liars. You are stealing his most valuable asset - life - denying him the opportunity to make his own decisions.

As for sex addiction I find it hard to see sexual desire as an addiction. I think of addiction as being something that we do compulsively or have a hard time stopping that also has adverse consequences. Unlike drugs or alcohol it is not a foregone conclusion that sex will have adverse consequences. It might if you are careless (STDs, pregnancy) or selfish (marital discord) but it need not necessarily be the case.

Especially when it comes to women we tend to assign one of two sexual categories - virtuous by society's standards or careless and completely non-discriminating slut. There is a logical middle ground which I think is where most sexually active women reside - sexually active in a deliberate and careful way. There are lots of men who are clean, discreet and non-judgmental who do not want more than a casual relationship and are perfectly comfortable with women who feel the same.

 

[Lazy_lay]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

Well, you seem to be pretty honest with your self. You are not engaging in any of the hostility or denial of your appetites. You understand your needs pretty clearly.

 

[policywank]

Infidelity is only a problem if someone gets hurts. I am sure my husband would never except my sexual activities so I am not about to tell him. I don't think I can stop having sex with other men. It's like I have to have it. If I ever get caught, and I don't think I will, then he will be hurt. If I tell him then he will be hurt. I think it's better that he doesn't know. If I could stop I would. That's why I asked the question. Am I a nymphomaniac?

Oh please.....that is a lame rationalization. You have fucked him over, can't bring yourself to stop doing it so the only thing to do is to keep fucking him over?

Assuming the urge really is that strong then the obvious choice is to end the relationship. You don't have to tell him it is because you have been fucking other guys. Yes the break-up will hurt him but it is by far the lesser of two evils. Since you are the one who set up this unpleasant choice the least you can do is face it like a grown-up. Your premise that carrying on is somehow about not hurting him is fatuous and self-serving.

A woman can be as sexually active as she wants to be and it need not addiction or betrayal as long as she takes ownership of her actions and doesn't indulge in this kind of destructive self-delusion.

 

[Lazy_lay]

Oh please.....that is a lame rationalization. You have fucked him over, can't bring yourself to stop doing it so the only thing to do is to keep fucking him over?

Assuming the urge really is that strong then the obvious choice is to end the relationship. You don't have to tell him it is because you have been fucking other guys. Yes the break-up will hurt him but it is by far the lesser of two evils. Since you are the one who set up this unpleasant choice the least you can do is face it like a grown-up. Your premise that carrying on is somehow about not hurting him is fatuous and self-serving.

A woman can be as sexually active as she wants to be and it need not addiction or betrayal as long as she takes ownership of her actions and doesn't indulge in this kind of destructive self-delusion.

Umm, the question was about nymphomania - a medical condition.

There's no such thing for one with an addiction as "it need not be addiction."

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypersexuality

 

[30bandits]

I have sometimes wondered if I am a nymphomaniac. I love having sex with different men. It's like an addiction. I need it. I crave it. I think about sex all the time. But I do control my urges to an extent. I am careful to keep my engagements infrequent enough not to raise suspicion by my husband. I am also careful to make sure I have sex with men who will never see me again.
I've looked up nymphomania and most definitions say it is uncontrollable. It also says that it is treatable... but I'm not sure I want to be cured. I was a drug addict once but this is different. Anyone have any thoughts?

I would like to offer my services...I am not a doctor though, consider me a physical therapist.....