Do you have what it takes?

[Garnate]

Killswish pointed out that I have five minions and that just won't do. FIVE? I don't fucking think so.

This laundry isn't going to do itself so I need more minions and if you think you've got what it takes, step right up.

Must-haves:

• Strong back, clean finger nails, and a keen sense of adventure.

Qualifications:

• Do you have at least 10 minutes of experience kissing my ass?

• Are you often tired of thinking your own thoughts?

If you answered yes to both or none of the above, this could be the job for you! Why stress out your brain muscle when you can just agree with everything I say? In between stroking my ego online, you will be required to busy yourself doing my dishes and scrubbing the toilets. Cool? Cool. I look forward to hearing from you.

 

[Sinny]

I am already bg's minion, but I am sure she would sublet me to you.

 

[Garnate]

I am already bg's minion, but I am sure she would sublet me to you.

I was really hoping BG would become a minion and then I'd get you by proxy! Whatever by proxy means.

By osmosis? That can't be right. High-stakes poker? Either or.

 

[Tryharder62]

Hey I already scrub the toilets, and do the laundry, cook dinners and drive the carpools. If I get to look at your cleavage I'm good with it.

 

[Garnate]

Hey I already scrub the toilets, and do the laundry, cook dinners and drive the carpools. If I get to look at your cleavage I'm good with it.

I love your low standards. You're in!

 

[Sinny]

I was really hoping BG would become a minion and then I'd get you by proxy! Whatever by proxy means.

By osmosis? That can't be right. High-stakes poker? Either or.

I would be happy to be a minion by proxy.
Except I don't do dishes, laundry or, well, anything. Except cook.

 

[thør]

I might allow you to use my cleaning fairy. She's cute. And boobs!

 

[BoyNextDoor]

No dolf option. Invalid pole.

PS - If Garnate won Sinny in a poker game it would begin the Rapture and harmonic resonance would ensue.

 

[neci]

i have dirty fingernails.

 

[Killswitch]

No dolf option. Invalid pole.

PS - If Garnate won Sinny in a poker game it would begin the Rapture and harmonic resonance would ensue.

Dude. You're trying way harder than you need too. A simple I can take out the garbage if I get to see tits would suffice.

 

[IrezumiKiss]

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/3d/05/85/3d0585cf80ae00832f7a8355162aeb9e.jpg

http://rule34-data-003.paheal.net/_images/afacc620f7e20d2d9a6ff1992a53fd82/508693%20-%20Despicable_Me%20Minion.jpg

#MoreMinionsForGarnate

 

[Disgustipated]

Dude. You're trying way harder than you need too. A simple I can take out the garbage if I get to see tits would suffice.

You must not read your pathetic attempts at "flirting" in the ISO thread.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

Dude. You're trying way harder than you need too. A simple I can take out the garbage if I get to see tits would suffice.

Dude. I like girls with big boobs. Whatever.

 

[Tryharder62]

I love your low standards. You're in!

I'll start stocking up!

http://1.media.collegehumor.cvcdn.com/9/5/collegehumor.031c21c90276f1a2a79f28e52c171aa5.jpg

 

[1HF]

We both already know I'm one of your minions.

I'm even the right size.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

We both already know I'm one of your minions.

I'm even the right size.

Gonna have to see them before we know if they are the right size. Just sayin'

 

[spacekowboy]

I would do some ass kissing if you would ever fucking show it to me!

 

[islandman]

I don't understand the second qualification.....

This is me thinking for myself.

 

[dirtwrench]

I cook. I clean. I do laundry (even now @ 1125pm). I have a serious case of the "Really wanna see Garnate naked and screw her brains loose" disease, but...

I'm more of a minion collector than a minion myself. Sorry my dear Ms G, you would have to step up YOUR game to collect me.

 

[BoyNextDoor]

I think I have what it takes

 

[SkAoUt]

I'm already a failed minion to another litster. The contract was written in blood and said "for all eternity" a LOT. Terribly sorry.

 

[MNGuy]

Must-haves:

• Strong back (but it is hairy), clean finger nails (Yeah, I practice good hygiene, I brush my teeth at work), and a keen sense of adventure (I sense adventure, but usually in daydreams).

Qualifications:

• Do you have at least 10 minutes of experience kissing my ass? (Would motorboating bewbies qualify?)

• Are you often tired of thinking your own thoughts (Never, I'm too much of an independent thinker)?

If you answered yes to both or none of the above, this could be the job for you! (I'm clearly overqualified) Why stress out your brain muscle when you can just agree with everything I say? In between stroking my ego online, you will be required to busy yourself doing my dishes and scrubbing the toilets. Cool? Cool. I look forward to hearing from you.

Another job I didn't get.

 

[CyranoJ]

Caveats:

- I need a solid ten-minute ogle of any ass before I kiss it.

- I am currently receiving my thoughts from the Reptoids of Zeta Reticuli, so anyone else who wants to transmit thoughts to me has some stiff competition.

- The Reptoids tell me that my back is strong, my nails are clean and that I have a keen sense of adventure, but they could be best described as unreliable narrators.

 

[Not Normal]

I don't know, man. Any job where I might have to clean Rimjob's puke is a real deal breaker.

 

[DesEsseintes]

Caveats:

- I need a solid ten-minute ogle of any ass before I kiss it.

- I am currently receiving my thoughts from the Reptoids of Zeta Reticuli, so anyone else who wants to transmit thoughts to me has some stiff competition.

- The Reptoids tell me that my back is strong, my nails are clean and that I have a keen sense of adventure, but they could be best described as unreliable narrators.

I've thought this for a while, but didn't want you to think I was stalking: you write a hell of a lot of excellent posts. Well met, sir.