How are you a better lover today?

[Lust Engine]

I'm sure the majority of us here started out fumbling around being totally inexperienced in sex the very first time, but with like most things I'd like to think we've gotten better over time.

But how?

Are we more attentive?
Do we perform oral better?
Have we become multi-orgasmic over the years?
Do we have more staying power now?
Did we discover newer kinks with the partner?

What have we added to our sexual arsenal that we didn't have a few years ago that make us better at sex now?

 

[sixfeetundernea]

I'm not quite sure I understand the question

 

[AutumnBliss]

I'm sure the majority of us here started out fumbling around being totally inexperienced in sex the very first time, but with like most things I'd like to think we've gotten better over time.

But how?

Are we more attentive?
Do we perform oral better?
Have we become multi-orgasmic over the years?
Do we have more staying power now?
Did we discover newer kinks with the partner?

What have we added to our sexual arsenal that we didn't have a few years ago that make us better at sex now?

Life is a journey, isn't it? I am definitely more attentive, perform oral quite well and have discovered new "kinks" along the way.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta.

I also have apparently become more privy to having words and phrases from media burst from my fingers at appropriate times. Cheers.

Edit: This was my 69th post. How amusing.

 

[cliteatingman]

Try me and find out

 

[Biker_Type]

I've been having sex for 46 years, I don't have enough time left to list the ways I'm better. So here's #1...I focus on my OL's pleasure more than mine!

 

[NestleSnipes]

I'd say the single best thing that has happened to my sex life was I stopped exclusively trying to make it good for whoever my partner was and started making it good for myself too. That's not to say my partner(s) don't still thoroughly enjoy themselves, but now they do because the adventure is fun and enjoyable not because I was trying to make it this awesome event. I was trying to hard. Making sex fun and exciting for myself has in turn made it better for them. It's a partnership now, not an act of service.

Coupled with that is added confidence. That will improve anyone. Having the confidence to lead my SO and I in our Open Relationship has opened us up to a pretty awesome sexual understanding. I'm a better lover, because I developed confidence in getting ours ours. It's fun, it's good. It's better now than ever.

 

[Mercury_Maniac]

unfortunately nothing has changed.

 

[Joel_Mcphee]

Practice makes perfect. Lol. I have, I think, become better adept at certain things. Such as giving more attention to her heaving breasts. Also in exploring her rather sensitive but delicate flower. All in all I would say I have become better atuned with her body and needs.

 

[suckonsimon]

Hey, Lust Engine, an excellent question to pose! The thread promises to be a good read.

First things I learned were about the subtleties of feminine arousal. That's a whole library of books of course. I'm talking about how a man walks in the front door home from work and greets his woman, onwards.

Took me a few years to learn the correlation between the manner of my first thirty seconds of vaginal penetration and the total length of time before ejaculation: that 'pause, enjoy, slow build' at least tripled the time I had for some confident pounding back in the day when premature ejaculation was an issue.

Took me even more years to learn how to use my fingers in such a way as she did not need to say to me, "ooh - gently".

Getting into regular cycling in my late thirties to the present - I would not believe the difference which really well toned legs on a guy makes to sex!

I'll post again soon as I've more to say; oh yeah.

 

[thruster315]

I agree with simon here. I'm curious as to what others have to say.

For me, it's obviously been patience. When I was younger it was all about getting her to that knee buckling orgasm. It was a sprint, but as I've gotten older- and supposedly a little better, I've discovered that it shouldn't be a mad dash to the finish. There's nothing wrong with the "marathon" and enjoying the scenery along the way.

 

[Ilovemymilf]

I know for me I have made it so much more about her, she gets everything first before I even consider cumming, patient and giving = better lover in my book

 

[Belleanna]

I would like to think that I'm a better lover than when I had my first sexual experience all those years ago. At least I hope I learned a thing or two.

 

[gregy70]

I can defer my ejaculation over & over & stay eager & able to please.
Well except when it's been weeks, then I can cum from just giving oral.

 

[kawa_kamuri]

What's better? I learned how to get what I want, to make it happen. I understand my own response and how to stoke my partners.

 

[BiTodd]

I made love to myself twice in a row today. That is something seeing as i am about to be 50. I am a better lover to myself. oh yeah and with a partner i am more adventurous, and attentive. I make sure i take my time with oral and fingering so that my lover get where they want to be. I aim to please.

 

[njgirl0863]

Two things:

1) it is more about giving than receiving

and

2) knowing your own body and communicating your wants/likes/needs

 

[DirkPitt06]

For me, personally, I've developed my stamina. I was actually unable to get my first lover off. There were questions of health there, but it was still a very disappointing experience.

A few gfs and lovers later and I'm capable of not only bring my partner to orgasm several times - if they're capable of it, that is - but I'm also capable of going three to four rounds a day. That usually means anywhere between 15 and 30 orgasms for my partner.

I'm also a much better kisser now, lol.

 

[LibraStud]

Two things:

1) it is more about giving than receiving

and

2) knowing your own body and communicating your wants/likes/needs

I like what you write - obviously you have much experience in this area. I know that communication is very important in any relationship.

 

[ontoit2]

I practice alone every day.

 

[ConflictedOne]

My oral skills are greatly improved over when I was younger...

 

[newhere2learn]

My oral skills are greatly improved over when I was younger...

Likewise. My college gf was a receiver but not a giver, so I got plenty of practice. Then my university gf was submissive so I was the charge.

Means I've now become rather adept at pleasing a lady in certain ways.

Being 6'8 and 16st though certain positions make me feel rather clumsy... Something I can't overly affect.


Additionally I've always been far more sexually uninhibited with fwb than gf/wives. Unsure why but the last fwb really benefitted from me letting go 150%

 

[suckonsimon]

The whole thing of being attuned to her at a given time: Whether she is in need of comfort, or release, from my attentions, or whether she is poised for arousal and wild stuff for the sheer pleasure of it, for example. I really do think that one reason we have sex as frequently is that she knows that I can read her well and therefore take her where she needs or desires to go.

Another whole set of answers from me at age 61, is the attention I have given to what a man can do about the impact of age on his sexual capacities. Frankly, she needs me as thick and as hard as I ever was, and lean and fit too, so I do what needs to be done to make it so. See my threads about some of that stuff.

 

[Mercury_Maniac]

I'm not. still not good at it.

 

[Eyereadtoo]

Easy answer, I just switched hands.

 

[Aphro]

Easy answer, I just switched hands.

LOL!