Isolated Blurt Thread

[oggbashan]

Some years ago I was asked to collect my Grand-daughter from a school function and, being the daft softy I am, I said yes. Then I discovered that it wasn't being held at the school.
So I turned up at the building, which was locked. I knocked, politely, and enquired after my Grand-daughter.
I was grilled quite thoroughly by two ladies (teachers?) with several questions including one about which Granddad I was. Eventually, I supplied sufficient information and the child sprinted out and flung herself into my arms at high speed.
Then the teachers {?} smiled.
But I felt like I'd been checked out by MI5 or someone.

I rarely collect my grandson from his pre-school. But if I do, I have an agreed password to use to identify me as his grandfather.

The first time I collected him, I had remembered the password.

I didn't need it. The teacher had been a classmate of my middle daughter and had been to birthday parties at my house. She recognised me instantly (I had a white beard even when she was young).

 

[NaokoSmith]

Things are very strict in schools these days re. collection. Good job too, if you have had to go through what Phoenix Mum has to go through with Egg terrified that her evil dad will try to kidnap her.

There are a lot of dads and grandads collecting from the Academy of Perfectly Ordinary Piglets. I also noticed recently that the rather yummy soft butch mum of Piglet's classmate has started bringing her girlfriend to school plays and Sports Day. Nobody bats an eyelash - except the girlfriend who has beautifully made up eyelashes.

Hooray!

 

[NaokoSmith]

Isolated Blurt - don't even go here

Fourth week after interview, still waiting for fabricated reason as to why I am unappointable to teach a subject in which I am a published expert. I do not hate the manager for doing this to me cuz I am used to it from him. I hate the institution for creating this looking glass world in which they send me emails saying things about an 'inevitable delay' (while he pisses around for four days before going off on holiday then pisses round for another four days saying he can't put his hands on the paperwork from the interview). I know they are planing to say black is white so they can hang me out to dry rather than nail him to the floor.

I was so miserable yesterday that I actually phoned the counseling helpline number they gave me. I just wanted someone to give me a reality check and say it's not your fault. I just wanted to get back into writing my review blog, and be able to carry on - as I'm doing - teaching and marking, even though I am petrified when all my students get bloody Distinctions in case the management give me a kicking for it instead of saying: "Hey, you must be teaching them well." Students are gleeful - less at the mark, more at having learned and got it right, while I go: "Um, yeah, that was great. Next time, make sure you do this too. Fuck fuck, I am going to be hung out to dry for this."

The counseling service started babbling about legal advice and I should go to ACAS . I am like: "No, I have got union representation (of course! ethnic minority woman, I always make sure my union dues are up to date). I just want someone to tell me it's a tough spot and I am entitled to be a bit miserable."

I turn to the counseling service cuz the Fella's idea of support is to tell me I am making a big fuss, why am I whining about my career going down the drain, I am getting to be a School Governor (even Piglet said: "But what paid work can mum get to do?"). Then he fucks off to his sick (in many ways) Dad's for the weekend, comes back totally emotionally exhausted with caring for the Dad, goes off to work without telling me if he needs a packed lunch this week, then looks like he is hard-done by because I didn't make one, having got fed up to the back teeth with preparing something only to be told: "Oh no, I have got a slapup feast today with important research people you will never get to work with."

When I suggest he could be giving me some support, he looks incredulous. "Do you mean money?" he says.

Shoulda said Yes!

 

[Handley_Page]

Isolated Blurt - don't even go here


When I suggest he could be giving me some support, he looks incredulous. "Do you mean money?" he says.

Shoulda said Yes!

I feel this might have been done well on Facebook.

 

[NaokoSmith]

I feel this might have been done well on Facebook.

Especially as the Fella is a 'world expert' on social media!

 

[Handley_Page]

Especially as the Fella is a 'world expert' on social media!

 

[NaokoSmith]

Frequently warns me of the pitfalls awaiting bored housewives who go online and get drawn into scams! while adding that he will be late back from the office again as he has another paper to draft.


OMG! you couldn't make it up! A woman friend of his research team pal's recently muttered to me: "But you actually know about this stuff, they are just writing about it." We had a snigger, poured another whisky and cruised another story while the guys argued about why the Com Sci bunch were so slow to get their algorithm on the go.

I am of course forbidden to write about this stuff in case the Fella is embarrassed by revelations that his partner is an internet slag.

 

[oggbashan]

...When I suggest he could be giving me some support, he looks incredulous. "Do you mean money?" he says.

Shoulda said Yes!

But we give you support, but not money.

And I don't mean support stockings. A MILF should never wear them.

I think you are right to avoid ACAS. Although you may be unpopular now, raising a dispute could make you unemployable, on the list (that is not supposed to exist) of awkward employees. It is difficult to suggest what you could do, but your union should be more helpful than the Counselling service.

When I needed my union, they sent a representative to sit with me while I made my case. In two hours' of interview, the union rep said not a word - because I knew more about the dispute procedure than he did. Doh!

I hope your union is better than that and can actually help when you eventually get the manufactured reason for your rejection. In the meantime, your union SHOULD be pressing for a quicker response.

 

[NaokoSmith]

But we give you support, but not money.

And I don't mean support stockings. A MILF should never wear them.

I think you are right to avoid ACAS. Although you may be unpopular now, raising a dispute could make you unemployable, on the list (that is not supposed to exist) of awkward employees. It is difficult to suggest what you could do, but your union should be more helpful than the Counselling service.

When I needed my union, they sent a representative to sit with me while I made my case. In two hours' of interview, the union rep said not a word - because I knew more about the dispute procedure than he did. Doh!

I hope your union is better than that and can actually help when you eventually get the manufactured reason for your rejection. In the meantime, your union SHOULD be pressing for a quicker response.

Oh Ogg, thank you.


You do all give me support. I come in here and blurt off about some quite high intellectual things and people sometimes listen respectfully! and let me flirt too, which is so much fun.

I would much rather have support (although a new handbag is OK, I suppose, as long as it is a Radley).

Honestly, the union and I are doing all we can. My rep is the same one I had when this same thing happened two years ago. Nothing could be done then, because the university procedures are so well designed in the managers' favour. I wait to see if something can be done now, in a different way since when they do something to you twice, it starts to look malicious not merely incompetent. First I have to get the completely meaningless feedback. Then I can say: Ok, that was a waste of time, now let's open up the grievance like I wanted to in the first place, unless you want to apologise and restore my appointability now.

I didn't think ACAS was a very good idea. But I think the counselor was just scrabbling about for something to say to me. Wish she had just listened, that's all I wanted.

Anyway, enough about that.

I think you are quite right about the stockings! With legs like ours, support is not what we are looking for, is it. As I cycle on the school run with my skirt tucked in my knickers so it doesn't go in the oily chain, I get a lot of looks at my leg from passing car drivers which I suppose you could call supportive. And as I always say, as long as crashes are not happening to me, it's not my problem is it?

 

[NaokoSmith]

Aww, I ran back in to say a proper thank you to you, guys.


I had a nice morning tootling about in here, and I even drafted a couple of reviews for my blog - which I had not managed to get on and do for a while.

When I spoke to that stupid counselor, she said, "Have you not got any friends you can go out with to take your mind off it?"

I had to say, I have Swiss Army wife who just got a job - in a nearby university, so not only is she not around to have coffee in the day any more, when I do see her she is of course full of the joys of her new academic job, which is totally understandable.

And I have Phoenix Mum, who is having to sell her house cuz Egg's Dad dragged her through the courts to try to claim custody of Egg even though now the Child Services won't even allow him to have her visit him he is so badly behaved. It cost Phoenix Mum £6000 to keep Egg, even though she got legal aid she has to pay that back. And he told the mortgage company she was defaulting when she wasn't. He went on the sick, and lied that he wasn't in work so as not to pay Phoenix Mum. And now Phoenix Mum has to sell her house and move away from us.

And I said, "I have my online friends. They are always there. There is always someone to have a cup of pretend tea with, or you can drop someone an email, it might take a couple of days, then they will get back to you and let you know you are not a moaning Minnie and they are sorry you are having a ropey time."

Thank you all so much. I really value it that I can come on and post about the representation of reality in Western literature and everyone goes , but they do it discreetly, LOL, and I can post about my legs (which are not as good as Ogg's of course) and people are fine with that too. The representation of reality is something I am very excited about, and I am kinda attached to my legs too, so I really appreciate being able to share.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

My sympathy and empathy, Naoko. Academic management seems to think its role is to prevent education. Many years ago, management at my institution sent a memo among itself asking how they could prevent my gaining tenure. The Dean's secretary, however, was "kind" enough to cc the Union with all the correspondence. I've enjoyed tenure for 40 years now, and it's given me far more than job security.
I'm sorry I can't help with your current difficulties (unless, of course, you want me to hire you at my college), but I might be able to share a real cup of tea with you in September - It looks like I'll be conferencing within train distance.

 

[SweetMaj]

Having too much time on my hands to think about how I am
is not healthy for me these days.

Thats why I'm heading home from the country tomorrow, and
going back to work on Thursday.

 

[TxRad]

Having too much time on my hands to think about how I am
is not healthy for me these days.

Thats why I'm heading home from the country tomorrow, and
going back to work on Thursday.

 

[Laurel]

Thought you authors would appreciate the very fun and silly new song from the always fun and silly Weird Al.

"Word Crimes"
http://www.weirdal.com/

 

[SweetMaj]

 

[Handley_Page]

Having too much time on my hands to think about how I am
is not healthy for me these days.

Thats why I'm heading home from the country tomorrow, and
going back to work on Thursday.

I have a shoulder, at need.
Big Hug

 

[SweetMaj]

I have a shoulder, at need.
Big Hug

Thank you, HP.

I feel a lot better now that I'm home!

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Thank you, HP.

I feel a lot better now that I'm home!

Welcome back from the country, Maj!

 

[SweetMaj]

Welcome back from the country, Maj!

Thank you, Tio.

I LOVE it when you're stalking me!

 

[glynndah]

Three paper boxes filled with "new" used books and ten pounds of bubble gum. I'm just about ready to start school again.

 

[Tio_Narratore]

Watch it, Glynndah; I'm still on summer vacation!

 

[Handley_Page]

Three paper boxes filled with "new" used books and ten pounds of bubble gum. I'm just about ready to start school again.

Planning on starting a fire ?

 

[oggbashan]

Why did I get involved in this latest community project?

All it gives me is grief. I'm acting as devil's advocate all the time, asking:

"Can we do this?" and answering "Unless x,y and z -No."

"Have got the money?" and answering "No. Not nearly enough."

"So, can we raise the money, in time?" and answering "No. We should have started months ago."

"What can we do with what we have?" and answering "Not nearly enough."

Guess who is unpopular.

 

[_Lynn_]

I wonder how many more calls it will take before they get the bill right?

 

[Bramblethorn]

Why did I get involved in this latest community project?

All it gives me is grief. I'm acting as devil's advocate all the time, asking:

"Can we do this?" and answering "Unless x,y and z -No."

"Have got the money?" and answering "No. Not nearly enough."

"So, can we raise the money, in time?" and answering "No. We should have started months ago."

"What can we do with what we have?" and answering "Not nearly enough."

Guess who is unpopular.

One of my recent jobs:

"Hey, this project that we did two years ago. If we wanted to run that again, to the same specs but with half the funding, what options do we have?"

I'm sure everybody will be shocked to hear that the answer was "none".