Reluctance to reveal my kinks to playmates

[Cobra6813]

Hi all

Does anyone else have a reluctance to reveal their kinky side to a new or recently new playmate? If so how did you overcome this

To me the mind is the most important sex organ. When you click with another and hit their turn ons as well as yours can result in mind blowing sexual fun

Here is my situation, I am a long time married man with a beautiful wife. We have been swinging on and off for about 10 years. We are both in shape and attractive so we have no problems hooking up with other couples. However I am always looking to up the excitement level

My kink is that I have a submissive streak and have had a foot fetish for as long as I can recall. Love the look, feel and taste of women's beautiful feet in heels hose and bare. I also love aggressive and take charge women who know what they want.

When I was younger I revealed my kinks to my first love....well that kind of scared her off. I took it slow with my wife and she has come to love my kinks and enjoy the pleasure it gives her.....I would like to extend this type of play to swing playmates however I am reluctant to come across as a freak so I stick to straight vanilla sex which can leave me wanting

Has anyone else come across this? How did you get over the fear and just let your new playmate know what turns you on? For instance, I'd love to suck her toes when we are playing but don't want to be rejected or be a turn off.....any suggestions?

Thanks

 

[shrek100]

I think we can all relate to this.
I had a really kinky ex years ago who would do anything she wanted, she didn't care if I thought she was a freak or not! I am pretty much the same.
My wife was very "straight" and it took me a while to lead her to corruption. With us it started watching done porn, can't remember what it was now, but she said "I wouldn't do that, would you?" I smiled and said not for a few years
Anyway the conversation continued with the help of a few glasses of wine! I told her everything I had done, was into and why. She was shocked and couldn't believe what I found to be a turn on.
Any way that was the turning point for us.
I decided if she was that shocked I could blame it on the wine .

My wife is now "almost as bad" as me

 

[shelbakk]

Sharing

I have discussed with my wife about sharing her with other men and she is some what up for it bit insists on the 'perfect' man. It did take awhile to tell her.

I have not spoken to her about my love for panties and bi sex. When ever gay or Alt lifestyles is mentioned in movies or news she says 'that's disgusting' or similar words.

 

[jomar]

Cobra, it's simple. Look for swing partners who are into what you like. You and your wife are swingers...that's a fairly accepting crowd...test it out and see. In fact, lots of dudes list as straight when they are bi...the kink is there, just do it.

 

[mugs101]

@%#^&

 

[yandere]

i wouldn't want to reveal everything right away to a new partner, because i think mutual exploration is fun. there's no real need for them to know i'm turned on by something if we might not do it for awhile.

all the posts about having wives and not telling them your fetishes is kind of depressing, though. if your wife loves you, why wouldn't she want to know all about the things you like?

 

[Cobra6813]

My original post may not have been clear and to clarify, my wife fully knows about my fetish and submissive tendencies. She accepts and embraces them and we have a lot of fun with them. My reluctance is with swing playmates. I would like to deepen that experience with new partners...just hesitant on bringing it up cause I don't want to come off as a freak.

 

[Marci_M]

Yummerini

I can't imagine why any woman would object to having her toes sucked. To me, it's delightful!

 

[mugs101]

I can't imagine why any woman would object to having her toes sucked. To me, it's delightful!

Its also delightful to do, I love swirling my tongue around my wife's toes.

 

[Cobra6813]

Thanks for the responses. I appreciate it. I probably need to just go for and stop being to self conscious of how it is interpreted.

I can't imagine why any woman would object to having her toes sucked. To me, it's delightful!

Marci, I'd be more than happy to provide you with some delightful toe sucking any time you'd like. I am sure you will enjoy it

 

[Marci_M]

Ok, but bring your wife along Woohoo!

 

[Cobra6813]

Let me see about making that happen...