women: how to approach through a PM...

[Sweetdaisymae]

Theres a sexual difference. Women window shop and men are after a score. And women always buy whats 2 sizes too small.

Wrong! I seem to always buy too large and end up with my jeans falling down. Its so irritating!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Wrong! I seem to always buy too large and end up with my jeans falling down. Its so irritating!

Shame on you! No woman in the history of Earth ever bought too large!

 

[Sweetdaisymae]

Shame on you! No woman in the history of Earth ever bought too large!

I guess I don't like wasting money on shit that I will never get into, buying too big, I can take it in for a perfect fit (which no off the peg clothes ever do)

 

[boutrosboutros]

I think it needs to be said that no matter how well thought out, original or relevant your pm is women have no obligation to respond to you. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a woman who, say, only responds to men who's profiles contain videos of them literally taking flight via helicopter dick. She is not wrong, or rude, or a bitch for ignoring your pm. She does not owe you her time or her interest.*

Many of these messages are dripping in that same obliviousness we see from the Nice Guys. Seriously, when your post can basically be summarized as "I'm awesome, and all the women who don't realize that are fucking stupid cuntwaffles and all the guys they do respond to are pathetic losers who kiss their feet to get attention" then it's kind of hard to have sympathy when you ask, in the next breath, why women don't respond to your pms.

Have some perspective. Men and women both send shitty PMs. We're not all that different. Honestly, for every 10 PMs a woman on Lit receives, 9 of them are the equivalent of a dude driving past on street and yelling 'show me your tits!' out the window. If 1 in 10 of the PMs you get from women are worth reading, you can probably conclude women aren't any worse than we are. (I suspect their rate of bad PMing is considerably lower, however.)

*The same applies to guys.

In my specific case, it is entirely accurate to summarise my position as: "I'm awesome, and all the women who don't realize that are fucking stupid cuntwaffles and all the guys they do respond to are pathetic losers who kiss their feet to get attention."

 

[XtraKat]

Don't make yourself look too desperate nor pushy. I know I don't like it.​

 

[LoveToLurk]

For me, cleverness gets me almost every time. Well thought out cleverness and/or humor. I find the grammar police on lit who critique and put down posters who misspell, rude. It's not an English literature website. No need for meanness. That being said...poor spelling, grammar and punctuation are very off putting to me in an unsolicited PM. Then the guys that write a PM like a text: "i think ur cool and hott i will lick ur ass til u scream" Oh please. Friendly, funny banter. That's my two cents.

 

[boutrosboutros]

For me, cleverness gets me almost every time. Well thought out cleverness and/or humor. I find the grammar police on lit who critique and put down posters who misspell, rude. It's not an English literature website. No need for meanness. That being said...poor spelling, grammar and punctuation are very off putting to me in an unsolicited PM. Then the guys that write a PM like a text: "i think ur cool and hott i will lick ur ass til u scream" Oh please. Friendly, funny banter. That's my two cents.

Ah, but how do you approach through a PM?

 

[Emerson40]

For me, cleverness gets me almost every time. Well thought out cleverness and/or humor. I find the grammar police on lit who critique and put down posters who misspell, rude. It's not an English literature website. No need for meanness. That being said...poor spelling, grammar and punctuation are very off putting to me in an unsolicited PM. Then the guys that write a PM like a text: "i think ur cool and hott i will lick ur ass til u scream" Oh please. Friendly, funny banter. That's my two cents.

Never underestimate the importance of good grammar, spelling, and puncuation. Whether reading posts or PMs, an impression is left with the reader about the writer.

Spot the differences:

LoveToLurk helped her Uncle Jack off the horse.

LoveToLurk helped her uncle jack off the horse.


You're right, it's not an English Lit site. But it is a site where adults - a good number of them intelligent folks - interact. It is not unreasonable to expect those posting or sending you a PM to have at least mastered some basics.

Wit, friendly banter, and humor can all be acheived without text-speak, or writing like you have the reading / writing comprehension of an eleven year old.

When approaching anyone through a PM you probably want to present yourself in the best way possible. As others have pointed out in the thread, what you say should be engaging, show interest, invite interaction, etc. All of that works best if you know your way around I'm / I'am, there / their / they're, your / you're as well. Just the basics.

Just a couple cents thrown in with your two.

 

[Que]

Geez...

Speaking of punctuation changing meaning, the choice of word order does too.

My grammar is quite rusty....

It was:
Women: (This indicates WHO it is addressed to.)
Subject followed:"How to approach through a PM."

It wasnt:
"How to approach women through PM"

Nor was it:
Women: How to approach (you) through PM?
(Notice how I cleverly left off the question mark in the thread title.)

I even went back and edited my OP to include handy Cliff Notes so one doesn't have to wade through my trademark TL;DR. I dunno, I do that too...read a thread title, miss the OP's point and ramble on...

My statement to women about how I would prefer they approach me (should they be so inclined) was declarative, NOT a query....As it were.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

For me, cleverness gets me almost every time. Well thought out cleverness and/or humor. I find the grammar police on lit who critique and put down posters who misspell, rude. It's not an English literature website. No need for meanness. That being said...poor spelling, grammar and punctuation are very off putting to me in an unsolicited PM. Then the guys that write a PM like a text: "i think ur cool and hott i will lick ur ass til u scream" Oh please. Friendly, funny banter. That's my two cents.

Different strokes for different folks.

12 years ago I was on chat, got a PM from a woman, and I promptly replied, GO FUCK YOURSELF AND GET LOST. We remain close friends today. I thought she was someone else when I bit her.

Be the hell who you are! and fuck the girls who don't like you. I include Emerson in the with the girls. He's what I call a pussy with a handle.

 

[boutrosboutros]

Geez...

Speaking of punctuation changing meaning, the choice of word order does too.

My grammar is quite rusty....

It was:
Women: (This indicates WHO it is addressed to.)
Subject followed:"How to approach through a PM."

It wasnt:
"How to approach women through PM"

Nor was it:
Women: How to approach (you) through PM?
(Notice how I cleverly left off the question mark in the thread title.)

I even went back and edited my OP to include handy Cliff Notes so one doesn't have to wade through my trademark TL;DR. I dunno, I do that too...read a thread title, miss the OP's point and ramble on...

My statement to women about how I would prefer they approach me (should they be so inclined) was declarative, NOT a query....As it were.

It's amazing how few people can actually read and understand a very simple original post.

 

[Que]

It's amazing how few people can actually read and understand a very simple original post.

Like I say I do that too sometimes; sometimes I'll get a whole post written and then I'll go back to read other peoples comments and I realize that I missed the whole just of the OP...

Which embarrasses me so I always go back and ediit to include something at least tangentially relevant. I tend to leave my original irrelevant thought in there because I'm so proud of my every one of my words of course.

 

[LoveToLurk]

Ah, but how do you approach through a PM?

Well, Mr. Secretary General, Ret.,
I apologize for misunderstanding the thread. My bad. At least I wasn't the only one! To answer your question, I don't often send unsolicited PM's. If I do though, it is likely a comment or compliment based on one of their posts or stories. My closest friend on lit resulted from sending some sincere empathy about something he posted about his life situation. It never occurred to me that he'd even write back, I just wanted to say that I know that pain and was sorry.

Does that answer your question?

 

[LoveToLurk]

Never underestimate the importance of good grammar, spelling, and puncuation. Whether reading posts or PMs, an impression is left with the reader about the writer.

Spot the differences:

LoveToLurk helped her Uncle Jack off the horse.

LoveToLurk helped her uncle jack off the horse.


You're right, it's not an English Lit site. But it is a site where adults - a good number of them intelligent folks - interact. It is not unreasonable to expect those posting or sending you a PM to have at least mastered some basics.

Wit, friendly banter, and humor can all be acheived without text-speak, or writing like you have the reading / writing comprehension of an eleven year old.

When approaching anyone through a PM you probably want to present yourself in the best way possible. As others have pointed out in the thread, what you say should be engaging, show interest, invite interaction, etc. All of that works best if you know your way around I'm / I'am, there / their / they're, your / you're as well. Just the basics.

Just a couple cents thrown in with your two.

Emerson40: Hysterical example. Love it! I obviously couldn't agree more. Adding a few bucks in with the other few cents

 

[LoveToLurk]

Geez...

Speaking of punctuation changing meaning, the choice of word order does too.

My grammar is quite rusty....

It was:
Women: (This indicates WHO it is addressed to.)
Subject followed:"How to approach through a PM."

It wasnt:
"How to approach women through PM"

Nor was it:
Women: How to approach (you) through PM?
(Notice how I cleverly left off the question mark in the thread title.)

I even went back and edited my OP to include handy Cliff Notes so one doesn't have to wade through my trademark TL;DR. I dunno, I do that too...read a thread title, miss the OP's point and ramble on...

My statement to women about how I would prefer they approach me (should they be so inclined) was declarative, NOT a query....As it were.

DOH!!! I hate when I misunderstand a thread. So sorry!

 

[Que]

DOH!!! I hate when I misunderstand a thread. So sorry!

no worries...more people took it the other way then the way I intended...the other way makes for a good thread too, it just wasn't what I was about at the time...


The person that inspired the thread I never heard from again...I WAS interested, and have no idea what specifically it was in my (detailed) response to her (minimalist) initial pm that was so off-putting to her... shrug.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Prolly missed her meds that day. Its a common problem with LIT gals.

 

[LoveToLurk]

no worries...more people took it the other way then the way I intended...the other way makes for a good thread too, it just wasn't what I was about at the time...


The person that inspired the thread I never heard from again...I WAS interested, and have no idea what specifically it was in my (detailed) response to her (minimalist) initial pm that was so off-putting to her... shrug.

That's a bummer. Sounds like you deserved someone better.
I guess it's better to be blown off from the first message than the 50th, yes? (in terms of thoughtlessness)

 

[LoveToLurk]

Prolly missed her meds that day. Its a common problem with LIT gals.

That's not very nice

 

[crazychemgirl]

That's not very nice

agreed.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

That's not very nice

Take a poll and see how close I am to the truth.

Show of hands! How many of you gals take meds?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Take a poll and see how close I am to the truth.

Show of hands! How many of you gals take meds?

Take a poll...

Show of hands!

How many people think this doddering old fuckwit goat should be on meds and locked away?

I'm constantly baffled that you post this shit. There are so many times where I wonder if you're joking. But I've come to the conclusion you really are the cockwallet you portray.

What I don't believe is that you've had sex with as many (willing) girls as you claim. You act like you're Bradley Fucking Cooper. You talk about the girls here like they are just foaming at the gash to get to know you. No one wants to listen to your ramblings about how the women here are crazy. I presume you base that on the fact that they aren't interested in you, you Yosemite Sam looking fucker.

http://yosemitesamquotes.com/wp-content/uploads/Yosemite-Sam-Quotes-300x281.png

 

[LoveToLurk]

Take a poll...

Show of hands!

How many people think this doddering old fuckwit goat should be on meds and locked away?

I'm constantly baffled that you post this shit. There are so many times where I wonder if you're joking. But I've come to the conclusion you really are the cockwallet you portray.

What I don't believe is that you've had sex with as many (willing) girls as you claim. You act like you're Bradley Fucking Cooper. You talk about the girls here like they are just foaming at the gash to get to know you. No one wants to listen to your ramblings about how the women here are crazy. I presume you base that on the fact that they aren't interested in you, you Yosemite Sam looking fucker.

http://yosemitesamquotes.com/wp-content/uploads/Yosemite-Sam-Quotes-300x281.png

Pmann, NICELY SAID!!!!! I was going to say it, but earlier in the week, ran into a crazily similar fuckwit. Speaking up only added fuel to his lame ass fire. But I'm glad you did, anyway. I really, truly don't get why people on this website get off on being abusive to others. It's not too hard to understand why HE needs to be on a sex website... I really try hard to ignore the douchebags. Sometimes my irritation gets the best of me though. Power to the Pmann

 

[Polecat74]

Spot the differences:

LoveToLurk helped her Uncle Jack off the horse.

LoveToLurk helped her uncle jack off the horse.

I laughed at this probably far harder than I should have.

 

[LoveToLurk]

I laughed at this probably far harder than I should have.

I thought it was hysterical!!! Laughing is good