How to control ejaculation

[intofdom]

Hi I am a virgin male.
I do mastrubate a lot but still find myself ejaculating too early.
I tried some kegel exercises but that didn't seem to work that well.

I was wondering if this really turns out to be a problem during actual sex. Or is it more controllable with a condom.
Any help experienced guys?

How to control my ejaculations?

 

[southern_gal]

From a woman's perspective I can attest that a condom does indeed slow it down (at least it does for my husband). When I want him to last a really long time we get the first one out of the way and after a bit he is ready again. You being younger likely have only a few minutes (if that) to wait until you are ready again. The second time he can last considerably longer. Also I will make sure to be on top if I am in the mood for a longer sex session. I can control the pace better. Try as he might, hubs cannot seem to stop when he starts getting close and I am on the bottom. Hope this helps but know something? I would not worry a whole lot about it if I were you. Just enjoy it with the person you are with.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

From a woman's perspective I can attest that a condom does indeed slow it down (at least it does for my husband). When I want him to last a really long time we get the first one out of the way and after a bit he is ready again. You being younger likely have only a few minutes (if that) to wait until you are ready again. The second time he can last considerably longer. Also I will make sure to be on top if I am in the mood for a longer sex session. I can control the pace better. Try as he might, hubs cannot seem to stop when he starts getting close and I am on the bottom. Hope this helps but know something? I would not worry a whole lot about it if I were you. Just enjoy it with the person you are with.

Good advice.

Youngsters oughta be good for 2-3 rounds in quick order. I was at 20.

Its better to just go with the flow and stay in the moment with a woman. I've had some excellent oral sessions.

 

[rosco rathbone]

Christ, kids getting everything backwards these days via the internet.

You cannot self diagnose as a preemie with no history of peen vagina contact.

Go divirgonize yourself first and report back later.

And stop wanking to internet porn, it screws up the wiring in your head and causes all kinds of problems.

 

[southern_gal]

Good advice.

Youngsters oughta be good for 2-3 rounds in quick order. I was at 20.

Its better to just go with the flow and stay in the moment with a woman. I've had some excellent oral sessions.

This reminded me of something my husband is fond of saying. He always tells me that when he gets too old to cut the mustard he will still be able to lick the jar.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

This reminded me of something my husband is fond of saying. He always tells me that when he gets too old to cut the mustard he will still be able to lick the jar.

I had a date a while back, with a younger woman, 'desperate' she said, for some sexual attention. Older men like me are disposable lovers, and thats okay cuz I like variety. Anyway, I took her to dinner, we hit it off, and she suggested we finish the evening at her home. The first round was oral, and she damned near drowned me when she unleashed all that stored sexual energy. It was intense. We spent several hours screwing in bed, in the pool, in her jacuzzi, etc. I left at 4am. The oral sex was the best, tho.

 

[Riles]

Hi I am a virgin male.
I do mastrubate a lot but still find myself ejaculating too early.
I tried some kegel exercises but that didn't seem to work that well.

I was wondering if this really turns out to be a problem during actual sex. Or is it more controllable with a condom.
Any help experienced guys?

How to control my ejaculations?

I'm trying to wrap my head around what is "too early" when it's just you and you. Do you use a stop watch or something? lol

You're just going off before you'd like to? Well...that's easy, SLOW DOWN, close you eyes, turn off the porn, whatever.

As for when you finally do do the deed, it's still likely going to be faster than you'd like....I think any male can attest to that. But with practice comes better performance...of course, having a teammate would be the more enjoyable way to do this.

 

[MatthewVett]

I would work on just delaying your orgasm for now. When you feel yourself getting close, stop and relax. Try to go as long as you can without orgasming, learn the signs of approaching orgasm, and learn what you can do to delay or stop it.

 

[Trolltroll420]

I consider premature ejaculation a compliment. I like to compliment a woman on her face.

 

[CWatson]

It's unlikely to be a big deal.

When you masturbate, you know exactly what to do with your hand to get yourself off. You know where all the sensitive spots are and just how to stimulate them. Efficiency is the name of the game with guys--especially since privacy whilst masturbating is something most of us have to do without at one time or another in our lives. So we learn what works on our individual penises and exploit that.

Now, tell me: how are you going to hit those exact spots on your cock using a foreign object that some other human being has total control over and keeps between her legs?

Yeah, told you it's unlikely to be a big deal. If anything, you're probably more likely to experience performance anxiety in the other direction: "Boy, now that I'm inside a girl for the first time, how do I get myself off?? This isn't like my hand at all!" No, it isn't. And eventually you'll learn what motions and positions work best for you, but until then you seriously are not going to have performance issues. American culture plays up intercourse as this wonderful thing, and it is... because of the skin-to-skin contact, the kissing, the intimacy. In terms of pure sexual stimulation, masturbation is usually better. Which, again, makes sense: even after you learn the synergy and can rub the right spots of your penis against the right spots of her vagina, your hand is still tighter and easier to position.

So work on it if you like--I mean, what guy doesn't want to be able to hold off ejaculation and have more sex? But don't worry about it. I mean, seriously--half of performance-anxiety issues are worry to begin with.

 

[Dumdiedum]

I'm 23, I know what you mean. You get of verry fast when you masturbate and now you think, that you're getting of much faster when you fuck. That's right. The first time I fucked, I came after sekonds. Maybye you're affraid of this, because you want to do it good, for the girl you fuck. But there are so much other way's to make a girl happy, without your penis. And, if the others say, after minutes you get hard again and than you will cum later. Furthermore there is a simple rule: The more you fuck, the later you ejaculate. You have to accustom yourself to the wonderful feeling of beeing inside a pussy. So, no panic. If the girl you have your first time with, loves you, she will accept that you get of verry fast (or before you're in) and will try it again, and aigain, and aigain...

(I hope you're able to understand my english)

 

[GiggLeGasm]

just for fun.. since I've not heard of many young men doing kegel exercises, what made you decide you should start them?

 

[C2W]

---

you are getting some advice here that's worthwhile, that's at least encourging.
Listen,
S-----L----O----W......., D----O----W----N

Quiet your mind. Shut off as much internal dialogue as you are humanly possible of shutting off. The purposely SLOW DOWN your breathing, long slow and deep breathes, YOU ARE NOT GOING TO SUFFOCATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This will slow down your heart rate which will always try and match pace with your 'wanting' of an orgasm.
You say the Kegels didn't help you--, then the odds are you were doing them wrong and if you are honest with yourself you will know what I'm talking about.
Slow your strokes down to the same speed as your breathing.
Start at the top and don't allow the lungs to fill until your stroke bottoms out at the pubic bone. Stroke upward with the same speed, filling the lungs slowly.

If you find that the rate is too slow, take a minute and get the interest back in the penis, to where it is hard again and practice man, practice.
You see all the masturbating you have been doing so far has been to release the pressure and get it off as quickly as possible. Reversing that practiced trend is going to take time.
There was also a post that said get your eyes off the porn, that was good advise.
If you want to learn how to control your orgasm, you have to dedicate time to practice and above all else, be honest with yourself.

 

[PhilGarlic]

only

Good advice.

Youngsters oughta be good for 2-3 rounds in quick order. I was at 20.

Only two or three?

To the OP, have two bricks to hand, when you think you are about to cum bang the bricks together on your balls, should stop any thought of cumming.

Does it hurt? only if you catch your thumbs!!!!!

 

[dougsan]

Well said PhilGarlic.

Stop worrying about fucking. It is natural for most folks and, based on my experience, all men bomb too early sometimes (time to graze?) and all men have instances when they can't perform with their dicks. When these things happen, the partner should understand and might enjoy the alternate playing. Just remember the rule: If you can't it doesn't mean your partner can't. S/he deserves satiation.

 

[rosco rathbone]

The kegels are part of controlling orgasm, but that's only the beginning. It teaches you the right muscle to flex in order to cut the orgasm off as it begins, but it takes a lot of practice to understand where that point is...and the more awareness you gain, the less likely you are to need the "emergency stop switch".

 

[shiny5437]

Kegels are a funny exercise. They're definitely a good idea for getting to know the muscles in the pelvic floor. The thing I think is important when doing them is to focus on the relaxation phase as much as the 'clenching' phase. It's by bringing those muscles under voluntary control and being able to relax them at will that helps to slow things down.