Self Motivation

[Typo Fu Master]

I think the common idea of motivation is like a personal trainer, standing over you, humiliating you and egging you on and shouting in your ear.

That doesn't work for me. I can't do that to myself. Eventually that energy wears itself out.

Pare down the tasks to exactly what you need to do and then get in the habit of doing them. I picked 10,000 steps because that's been presented as how much exercise you need to do in a day to be healthy. I have a calorie count based on my weight and then an app to keep track.

Make it easy, don't make it fanatic. Work smarter, not harder, and rely on the power of habit.

Realistically it's about making it easy to do and then building the right habits around them so it becomes just a part of your day. Make them sustainable and reasonable and if you want to do something really big, break it down into reasonable bits and do them one by one over time.

“[...] the awesome splendor of the universe is much easier to deal with if you think of it as a series of small chunks.”

― Terry Pratchett, Mort

I rag on myself for not doing it but it doesn't work for me either. I know that I AM capable of doing what needs to be done, but I think my priorities and definitions of what NEEDS to be done might differ from yours. And I do tend to look at the big picture and see everything all at once and feel overwhelmed. So step 1 is to get organized and make a list. Step 2 is to actually use it.

I thought about a reward for accomplishing whatever goal I set but its just so easy to grab the reward without doing the work first.

And I heard it takes 3 weeks to develop a habit. That's a long time when you'd rather be killing aliens.

 

[Recidiva]

“[...] the awesome splendor of the universe is much easier to deal with if you think of it as a series of small chunks.”

― Terry Pratchett, Mort

I rag on myself for not doing it but it doesn't work for me either. I know that I AM capable of doing what needs to be done, but I think my priorities and definitions of what NEEDS to be done might differ from yours. And I do tend to look at the big picture and see everything all at once and feel overwhelmed. So step 1 is to get organized and make a list. Step 2 is to actually use it.

I thought about a reward for accomplishing whatever goal I set but its just so easy to grab the reward without doing the work first.

And I heard it takes 3 weeks to develop a habit. That's a long time when you'd rather be killing aliens.

Yeah, I don't reward myself, really. These are considered to be basics. If reward works for you, then cool. I find that I get too mixed up in the reward being fitting, and as far as I'm concerned, I should get a trip to Jamaica for doing the dishes. So I value myself a bit too highly for my budget. Since I picked "the basics" then it's "shit I gotta do to keep breathing" territory.

I don't reward or penalize myself because that's just one more thing to obsess about whether or not I'm getting that system right, and I tend to escalate with rewards or punishments. I want too much reward and I'm immune to punishment, so it's just about knowing that these are the "absolute basics" that I sat down in a sane moment and had a quiet chat with myself and chose.

I have found that I should work on one at a time. Pick a simple thing like "take a shower" and put it on a list. Then check it off your list every day. Then add something else the next week. If you want to do 10,000 steps a day, start with 1000. Then just add more. So slowly refine your list and get in the habit of using it. I don't care if you start with "check the list daily" as a goal and then you do that. Do it until you don't think about it any more and then just slowly add to it. I have my list refined to when it's time to replace toothbrush heads and get the car washed and set medical appointments.

I've simplified it and made it so easy and brainless that I don't think about it and I have it broken down into small enough chunks that nothing takes more than 10-20 minutes at a time, at that.

So I just do a lot of things throughout the day, but none of them are really tough.

 

[Phelia]

My girlfriend is supposed to be moving in with me in a few months. Whether that will help or hinder remains to be seen.

If I knew how to force myself to be in the mood I wouldn't have made this thread.

Just wondered if people have some mental technique that helps them over the hurdle of getting started. Or if I'm just a slave to my desires.

Cool! I think cohabiting makes it easier to stay on top of lil cleaning chores.

And I know, that's the kind of advice that makes me want to punch someone in the throat. BUT, punching someone in the throat is probably pretty good exercise. So, swing away! You're welcome.

As for the behavioural stuff, there's trigger-habit-reward, but that's also something easier said than done. For me, the key is to make it minimally disruptive to my personality and lifestyle as possible. Reci's advice is, as always, pretty golden. I don't have any secrets. I do think the accountability thing helps - if I mention to someone, even casually, that I'm planning on a run/bike ride/gym trip, I am about 80% more likely to follow through - it works for me because I am a prideful, vain creature. I also know that when I'm hungry, I'm lazy, so I keep ungodly amounts of cut up fruits and veggies in my fridge and at least two emergency meals that I can have ready to eat in less than thirty seconds. I do have to pick one night a week to prepare all that, and it's never the most fun thing ever, but I'll bring my laptop into the kitchen and either dance to Queen or have old Arrested Development episodes playing in the background.

I need a nagging mother iPhone app to remind me to file my receipts and remember to call my relatives on their birthdays, though.

 

[Phelia]

Yeah, I don't reward myself, really. These are considered to be basics. If reward works for you, then cool. I find that I get too mixed up in the reward being fitting, and as far as I'm concerned, I should get a trip to Jamaica for doing the dishes. So I value myself a bit too highly for my budget. Since I picked "the basics" then it's "shit I gotta do to keep breathing" territory.

I don't reward or penalize myself because that's just one more thing to obsess about whether or not I'm getting that system right, and I tend to escalate with rewards or punishments. I want too much reward and I'm immune to punishment, so it's just about knowing that these are the "absolute basics" that I sat down in a sane moment and had a quiet chat with myself and chose.

I have found that I should work on one at a time. Pick a simple thing like "take a shower" and put it on a list. Then check it off your list every day. Then add something else the next week. If you want to do 10,000 steps a day, start with 1000. Then just add more. So slowly refine your list and get in the habit of using it. I don't care if you start with "check the list daily" as a goal and then you do that. Do it until you don't think about it any more and then just slowly add to it. I have my list refined to when it's time to replace toothbrush heads and get the car washed and set medical appointments.

I've simplified it and made it so easy and brainless that I don't think about it and I have it broken down into small enough chunks that nothing takes more than 10-20 minutes at a time, at that.

So I just do a lot of things throughout the day, but none of them are really tough.

I have a friends whose to-do lists are pages long. We're talking:

"1. Wake up.
2. Get out of bed.
3. Drink water.
4. Brush teeth."

etc, etc. He checks 'em all off, though, and loves it!

 

[Recidiva]

Cool! I think cohabiting makes it easier to stay on top of lil cleaning chores.

And I know, that's the kind of advice that makes me want to punch someone in the throat. BUT, punching someone in the throat is probably pretty good exercise. So, swing away! You're welcome.

As for the behavioural stuff, there's trigger-habit-reward, but that's also something easier said than done. For me, the key is to make it minimally disruptive to my personality and lifestyle as possible. Reci's advice is, as always, pretty golden. I don't have any secrets. I do think the accountability thing helps - if I mention to someone, even casually, that I'm planning on a run/bike ride/gym trip, I am about 80% more likely to follow through - it works for me because I am a prideful, vain creature. I also know that when I'm hungry, I'm lazy, so I keep ungodly amounts of cut up fruits and veggies in my fridge and at least two emergency meals that I can have ready to eat in less than thirty seconds. I do have to pick one night a week to prepare all that, and it's never the most fun thing ever, but I'll bring my laptop into the kitchen and either dance to Queen or have old Arrested Development episodes playing in the background.

I need a nagging mother iPhone app to remind me to file my receipts and remember to call my relatives on their birthdays, though.

You're so nice to me!

I have my calendar set up to remind me of birthdays two weeks before they happen. Sucks to be reminded ON the birthday, then it's too lale.

GroceryIQ is another good organizational app. All three of us in the house use it so I no longer have to maintain a paper list.

I do the freezer thing. Make a huge batch of food and freeze it all up into about 1/4 cup serving sizes. Frozen veggies, frozen meat and instant rice/noodles can make a meal fast. When it's Pernil and mole chicken and italian sausage...makes it a yummy meal fast.

I think I can make most things in a microwave now. I've gotten so good at lazy.

 

[Recidiva]

I have a friends whose to-do lists are pages long. We're talking:

"1. Wake up.
2. Get out of bed.
3. Drink water.
4. Brush teeth."

etc, etc. He checks 'em all off, though, and loves it!

You know, a few things on your list that are completely for the hell of it or frivolous could help. At least in my particular case. I'm really prone to migraines, and my "aura" involves not seeing lights, but mental fuzziness and plummetting mood.

Although "bath" isn't on my list any more, I'm still working on "apply minimal makeup and do hair" as a list item. If I'm not up to it and I know putting my hair up makes me tired because I'll just have to take it down later...

Then I know there's a headache a' comin'.

So you can get a good sense of your mood and capability for the day by just looking at the items and in which order you are going to approach them.

It's helped me be on the lookout for Mood Swings Ahead and "takethebluepillnow"

And a few extra items can get you going in the morning. "Check mail. Hah. Done." "Check answering machine." Hah. Done.

It's a built-in cheat.

 

[Typo Fu Master]

Good advice, folks.

I think what I need the most and can't get for awhile is the other person to keep me honest and motivate me. Especially with exercise. It's more fun to do it with someone.

 

[Recidiva]

Good advice, folks.

I think what I need the most and can't get for awhile is the other person to keep me honest and motivate me. Especially with exercise. It's more fun to do it with someone.

Cool! Good luck.

If you're really competitive...get a Wii and Wii Fitness program. We all had a blast beating each other's scores.

But I am the Yoga Empress and ain't nobody can outmeditate me.

 

[warrior queen]

I have loads of things I hate doing, that I need motivating for.
But in the end, I get them done by telling myself that once it's done, it's over.
Like cleaning the poddy lamb pen. Absolutely disgusting job and very messy. Takes an hour or so. I HATE doing it, but I know once it's done I don't have to go near it for another 3 days.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I dont have any problems doing anything, but the way I do them makes other people crazee. Shit! I generally read 4-5 books at the same time.

 

[Recidiva]

I dont have any problems doing anything, but the way I do them makes other people crazee. Shit! I generally read 4-5 books at the same time.

Bless my Kindle. I have 30 active titles right now. At least.

I like my books, like my chores, in little bites.

 

[HAL_9000]

The sooner the work or whatever is done the sooner you can do the good shit.

 

[pink]

The pain of not doing it must over come the pain of doing it.


Or something like that.