Advice for a complete Dork

[abit2theleft]

Okay, I haven't posted on Lit a lot and when I have it generally been to fulfill a more baser instinctual desire. Tonight though my mind is just not giving me a break.

First off I am a very social person but not great with women and I know that a lot due to confidence issues, but that's a discussion for a whole different time.
I met a girl about three weeks ago who I am definitely into, but am terrible at reading whether she is just flirty personality or deliberately flirting with me. The main issue is She recently moved here and is basically here until the fall, as she is helping her cousin with a newborn, working as a nanny. All or at least most of her friends have been my friends for awhile, and I don't want to ruin her summer if I do make it into an awkward mess. Go for it or no?

Yes I am fully aware that this makes me look like a prepubescent nerd, but i really don't care because if i get one good reply or message that makes me think about this in a new way it will be well worth my time. Thanks for reading this and hopefully someone will be able to make me think about this in a new way or give good advice. thanks!

 

[paganangel]

not sure what you're worried about.
or, more importantly, what you want.

 

[abit2theleft]

Is it worth it girl to chase her when she is moving away in four months and I don't know how she feels. At the risk of ostracizing her from our group of friends. or not?

sorry if I'm not making sense. just looking for advice when i don't know the question I guess

 

[bronzeage]

Always go for it.

If she is a nanny, her schedule is ruled by the baby and the parents. She won't have a lot of free time. Arrange your life so you are free when she is. Call her and ask her do something with you. Have a time, a place and an event(dinner, movie, concert, you know a place that makes a great banana split, whatever). All she has to decide is yes or no.

If you need more advice after that, make another thread.

 

[piccicatopolka]

Without being crass, go ahead and deliberately flirt back. Echo what she just said that seemed flirty in the form of a question. Make eye contact... a lot. Women will give you the right signals if its a go and if you're friendly without being pushy you may just find out where her ticklish spots are.

 

[paganangel]

Is it worth it girl to chase her when she is moving away in four months and I don't know how she feels. At the risk of ostracizing her from our group of friends. or not?

sorry if I'm not making sense. just looking for advice when i don't know the question I guess

i don't know how you'd ostracize her.
it's worth it if you don't want something long term.
you NEVER know how they feel unless you ask. (then you know sometimes)

here's something interesting, is it worth what? exactly what is it you think you're risking/losing?

 

[paganangel]

Without being crass, go ahead and deliberately flirt back. Echo what she just said that seemed flirty in the form of a question. Make eye contact... a lot. Women will give you the right signals if its a go and if you're friendly without being pushy you may just find out where her ticklish spots are.

or just do what he says.

 

[JohnnySavage]

Is it worth it girl to chase her when she is moving away in four months and I don't know how she feels. At the risk of ostracizing her from our group of friends. or not?

sorry if I'm not making sense. just looking for advice when i don't know the question I guess

Have you considered giving her $25,000? Maybe if you did that she'd swear fealty and stay with you FO Eva!

 

[paganangel]

stole my line.

 

[abit2theleft]

Johnny you make an excellent point.

Pagan, I am generally a relationship guy so I want long term more than short term definitely if I had the choice, as far as risking/losing she is a blast to hang out with, and I would rather be able to spend time with her as a friend than not at all. Also, i really just don't want to deal with an awkward mess every time I go hang out with my friends. Most of the people I hang out with are the 18 to like 25 range and it can be childish sometimes. I am probably reading too much into my own image on the ostracizing thing though you're right.

 

[paganangel]

Johnny you make an excellent point.

Pagan, I am generally a relationship guy so I want long term more than short term definitely if I had the choice, as far as risking/losing she is a blast to hang out with, and I would rather be able to spend time with her as a friend than not at all. Also, i really just don't want to deal with an awkward mess every time I go hang out with my friends. Most of the people I hang out with are the 18 to like 25 range and it can be childish sometimes. I am probably reading too much into my own image on the ostracizing thing though you're right.

also, you're acting like an 18 to 25 year old.
"I would rather be able to spend time with her as a friend than not at all."
horseshit. and the sooner you realize what a false choice this is, the better.

if you want something long term, you're wasting your time. why spin your wheels and miss the next big thing?

 

[abit2theleft]

also, you're acting like an 18 to 25 year old.
"I would rather be able to spend time with her as a friend than not at all."
horseshit. and the sooner you realize what a false choice this is, the better.

if you want something long term, you're wasting your time. why spin your wheels and miss the next big thing?

yeah i am...

 

[eyer]

Okay, I haven't posted on Lit a lot and when I have it generally been to fulfill a more baser instinctual desire. Tonight though my mind is just not giving me a break.

First off I am a very social person but not great with women and I know that a lot due to confidence issues, but that's a discussion for a whole different time.
I met a girl about three weeks ago who I am definitely into, but am terrible at reading whether she is just flirty personality or deliberately flirting with me. The main issue is She recently moved here and is basically here until the fall, as she is helping her cousin with a newborn, working as a nanny. All or at least most of her friends have been my friends for awhile, and I don't want to ruin her summer if I do make it into an awkward mess. Go for it or no?

Yes I am fully aware that this makes me look like a prepubescent nerd, but i really don't care because if i get one good reply or message that makes me think about this in a new way it will be well worth my time. Thanks for reading this and hopefully someone will be able to make me think about this in a new way or give good advice. thanks!

Dear abit2theleft:

Spend the time getting to know your dork better...

...for you are he and he will never leave you.

xoxoxo

Mom

 

[piccicatopolka]

or just do what he says.

'cause Imma Dood

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

If a woman likes you she'll come after you. This said, they all do it in their own way. So they may be obvious or stealthy, but theyll definitely be inside your normal grazing range.

If yuh gotta go looking for them take it that theyre NOT AVAILABLE.

So relax. Focus on your job or school or whatever, and see who strays into your pasture.

 

[Liar]

What's the worst that can happen? She tells you to back off, you back off, and after this summer you're outta each other's lives.