My robotic overlord lied to me

[CandiCame]

I am not in shape. At all. Despite what my Wii Fit trainer said. I just finished putting my little brother's trampoline together, then bouncing on it for like, I dunno, half an hour or something, and I am fucking dead. Left him out there playing, and he weighs like, 200lbs. And he's not tired! I need to work out more or eat less or something. I'm just gonna lay here and be dead now.

 

[Frizzle_Fry]

I am not in shape. At all. Despite what my Wii Fit trainer said. I just finished putting my little brother's trampoline together, then bouncing on it for like, I dunno, half an hour or something, and I am fucking dead. Left him out there playing, and he weighs like, 200lbs. And he's not tired! I need to work out more or eat less or something. I'm just gonna lay here and be dead now.

PT!!! PT!!! PT!!! GOOD FOR YOU!!!! GOD FOR ME!!! MMMMMM GOOD.

Ditch the wii fit...run a few miles a day with a 30-40 lb backpack on and do some P90X/insanity afterwards and you will be boss hoss in no time.

 

[TonyClifton]

I'm just gonna lay here and be dead now.

Join the club.

 

[KRCummings]

The Wii Fit is a fun way to burn a few calories on rainy days but it is in no way a good trainer. Even an ignorant emo twink should know that.

 

[warrior queen]

Wait - your little brother weighs 200 pounds???

 

[CandiCame]

Wait - your little brother weighs 200 pounds???

Yeah...

We have really bad parents. He has asthma and diabetus to- and lots of other health problems. When he was little he had nerve damage because of tetrogens and whatnot, but he's gotten over a lot of that. He still has behavioral issues, but he doesn't have any mental disabilities, which we were really worried about. But he is lazy as fuck. And he won't exercise with me, because when I try to get him to, he screams for mom and she tells me to stop picking on him, despite the fact that I just want him to be healthy. Like, I'm 5' 8" and 156 lbs last time I checked, which was yesterday, and I think I'm overweight. But he's 5' 3" and right at 200lbs- might've been 198, I think, last time we were at the doctor. Gramps makes him hike and fish and hunt and whatnot with him, trying to "toughen him up", and he bought him the trampoline in the hopes that he would actually use it, because it's good exercise.

He also eats nothing but crap. I think I've complained about my granny's cooking before- she's... very redneck- I mean, "southern" and that involves eating a fuck-ton of deep fried shit. These are people who own a deep fryer. I never owned a deep fryer. Because both my parents have health problems related to obesity. My brother is anorexic- like, he's on medication and therapy and whatnot for it, because he has severe control issues. We're both really bad to fall into intense calorie restriction, but I just, you know, don't think it's as unhealthy as he does. People forget that guy anorexia is different from the lady anorexia that you hear so much about- it's a control thing. But yeah, my point is, he's lazy and they feed him deep-fried everything, and it's not good for him.

He's also the only one among the three of us who actually looks like my dad. My middle brother and I both have the jet black hair, darkish skin and eyes, high cheek bones- hell, excellent bone structure altogether, and somewhat lean stature like my mom. He's got that pale skin, brown hair, blue-green eyes, stocky build, round face, etc. Like, his body is set up to where if he got in shape, he'd look Sayan- he'd knock your ass down. No matter how fit I got, I could never be as strong as he could. I wish he would. He'd be a scary motherfucker instead of a chubby kid.

 

[CandiCame]

The Wii Fit is a fun way to burn a few calories on rainy days but it is in no way a good trainer. Even an ignorant emo twink should know that.

OK- I don't go outside. I hate the outside. There's dirt and bugs out there. I occasionally go outside just to get away from everyone, but for the past 3 years I haven't gone outside for longer then it took me to walk from one building to another. This whole planet is made of... filth.

 

[CandiCame]

Ditch the wii fit...run a few miles a day with a 30-40 lb backpack on and do some P90X/insanity afterwards and you will be boss hoss in no time.

That sounds... just awful. But I do ALWAYS have a 50-some lb backpack on, just because I pack a lot of shit around. Sometimes I have a significantly lighter laptop bag, now that I need less shit, where I'm not in school and not packing around books and art supplies. I doubt it weighs 15 lbs. I knew what my backpack weighed because everyone was always like, "WTF do you have in this?" and made fun of me for packing so much stuff around, so I weighed it.

 

[warrior queen]

OK- I don't go outside. I hate the outside. There's dirt and bugs out there. I occasionally go outside just to get away from everyone, but for the past 3 years I haven't gone outside for longer then it took me to walk from one building to another. This whole planet is made of... filth.

I am OCD with regard to germs and dead skin cells, but I also spend a shitload of time outdoors.
Gardening, hiking, hell even just prefer to sit and read a book outdoors.
You need to get out - at the very least you'll maybe inspire your little brother to get out as well.

 

[CandiCame]

I am OCD with regard to germs and dead skin cells, but I also spend a shitload of time outdoors.
Gardening, hiking, hell even just prefer to sit and read a book outdoors.
You need to get out - at the very least you'll maybe inspire your little brother to get out as well.

He's way more outdoorsy then I am. I really do hate nature- not in the "cut it all down and pave over it" way, just in the I really have a bug phobia way. I will go out if someone makes me, like I go camping and whatnot, but I'm more trying to figure out how to charge my phone and whatnot.

I'd rather live in a city. I just don't like rural areas. Plus, being out here since they started stripping makes me sad. I grew up in these woods, I used to love them. Now they're all destroyed, things are exploding all the time, etc.

 

[Sean Renaud]

My little experience with Wii-fit is that it seems to take that time honored tradition of making fun of you to get you in shape. I know after it made my Mii chubby I was all "fuck you I'm gonna go play Mario Kart".

James. Please stop cosplaying as the Riddler. Your not the Riddler. You're one half of Team rocket. If you don't take off that silly disguise then prepare for trouble.

 

[CandiCame]

My little experience with Wii-fit is that it seems to take that time honored tradition of making fun of you to get you in shape. I know after it made my Mii chubby I was all "fuck you I'm gonna go play Mario Kart".

James. Please stop cosplaying as the Riddler. Your not the Riddler. You're one half of Team rocket. If you don't take off that silly disguise then prepare for trouble.

Yeah, it does. That's why I like it. I like having a robotic trainer who makes fun of me- it makes me want to prove him wrong. As you get better, he also is nice in that douche-bag trainer way though. I broke my push-up record, and he usually makes fun of me, and i was totally expecting it, then he was like, "You're pretty strong! I'm impressed!"

And I was like, "Wait? Really? Well that just zapped my motivation all to hell. I'm gonna play Zelda now."

If you skip a day, he'll make fun of you to. He's all, "Where were you yesterday? To tired to work out? Work out every day- or be a lazy fatass."

Sometimes, if I can't play that day, I won't play the next day either- because I don't want him to yell at me. He's a FUCKING COMPUTER PROGRAM- seriously, why do I care if he bitches me out? What the fuck is wrong with me?

Secondly- I AM NOT THE RIDDLER!! I am the Once-ler.
http://zipmeme.com/uploads/generated/g1331572538654279759.jpghttp://rule34-data-000.paheal.net/_images/66bde05254dbcb388a611f8e84581bbb/822213%20-%20Lorax%20Once-ler.png

I didn't draw that, BTW. I found it on Rule 34. We're talking Dr. Seuss, internet. Srsly.

 

[Sean Renaud]

Brain Age is the same way. It'll be all you haven't been around in a couple of days. What the fucks do you like being a dummy?

Sure you keep telling yourself you're not cosplaying the Riddler if it makes you feel better.

 

[CandiCame]

Brain Age is the same way. It'll be all you haven't been around in a couple of days. What the fucks do you like being a dummy?

Sure you keep telling yourself you're not cosplaying the Riddler if it makes you feel better.

Brain age depresses me. I'll let a video game tell me I'm out of shape, but I'll be damned if I let one tell me I'm stupid. Of course, at the time, I chalked it up to being a gamer. I have no excuse now. I'd be even sadder.

He-I- it doesn't even look like the Riddler!

 

[lovetoread]

Brain age depresses me. I'll let a video game tell me I'm out of shape, but I'll be damned if I let one tell me I'm stupid. Of course, at the time, I chalked it up to being a gamer. I have no excuse now. I'd be even sadder.

He-I- it doesn't even look like the Riddler!

Brain Age said I was too old to play it.

 

[CandiCame]

Brain Age said I was too old to play it.

Best I got was 22- at the time I was, I think 19?

The thing that got me was that game where people came in and out of the house. I lost count so fast. My brain was like, "I cannot give a shit. Let's play the 'pick the biggest number' game."

 

[Sean Renaud]

Best I got was 22- at the time I was, I think 19?

The thing that got me was that game where people came in and out of the house. I lost count so fast. My brain was like, "I cannot give a shit. Let's play the 'pick the biggest number' game."

That's cus those slimy fucks weren't content coming and going through the door. While you were watching the door they'd get beamed back to thier home planet via the fucking chimney. Until I figured out a trick for it the how many words can you remember used to fuck me pretty bad.

 

[lovetoread]

That's cus those slimy fucks weren't content coming and going through the door. While you were watching the door they'd get beamed back to thier home planet via the fucking chimney. Until I figured out a trick for it the how many words can you remember used to fuck me pretty bad.

Oh yea. I get this, I should have known.

 

[CandiCame]

Seriously though, try to play brain age while baked off your ass. That fucking floating head yelling at you for being a dumbass- it's all kinds of fucked up. You're handing the gameboy to other people going, "Make it stop!! Why does the floating head hate me? HE KNOWS WHO I AM, OH GOD!!"

I liked the sudoku, though. How it told you when you fucked up.

 

[Sean Renaud]

I can't believe the Riddler had a hard time proving he was smarter than a computer.

 

[semen4her]

You're a fat little emo bitch.

Own it.

 

[CandiCame]

I can't believe the Riddler had a hard time proving he was smarter than a computer.

Arrrggg! Sean... you are becoming close to me declaring you my nemesis. We'll be like Monarch and Dr Venture in the first season, where I'm your arch-enemy and you.... don't care.

Be forewarned- you are making a very powerless enemy.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

[KRCummings]

You're a fat little emo bitch.

Own it.

Actually he seems to be kind of proud of that.

 

[lovetoread]

You're a fat little emo bitch.

Own it.

Minus the fat, yea I own it.

 

[CandiCame]

You're a fat little emo bitch.

Own it.

That made me think of Foamy. "If you're a fat bastard, be proud to be a fat bastard!"

I'm gonna go bake some motherfucking cookies.

Like a boss.