Dear: Oreo Cookies,

[semen4her]

Stop fucking around.

30% less fat means 100% more crap!

also

100th anniversary is no excuse for making shitty cookies.

Stick to what you get paid to do, make Oreo cookies.

Do not stray.

 

[KRCummings]

Nobody expects an Oreo to be healthy. Make the fuckers right.

 

[pointless]

the chocolate ones are made of happiness molecules harvested from the heart of a unicorn cub.

that's right. unicorns have cubs. don't doubt it.

 

[KRCummings]

If I was in charge they'd just sell bags of the filling. Fuck a bunch of cookie.

 

[pointless]

you can make the filling yourself. just buy some vanilla icing and then dump about a pound or two of sugar and half a large can of crisco into it and then magic shit happens and you have oreo filling.

 

[KRCummings]

you can make the filling yourself. just buy some vanilla icing and then dump about a pound or two of sugar and half a large can of crisco into it and then magic shit happens and you have oreo filling.

It's not the same. You need all that chemical shit they add in the factory. There's where the real magic happens.

 

[semen4her]

Nobody expects an Oreo to be healthy. Make the fuckers right.

Seriously.

Those fuckheads swindled my wife into buying that crap, with their fancy packaging and shit.

 

[CHNOPS]

Seriously.

Those fuckheads swindled my wife into buying that crap, with their fancy packaging and shit.

Your wife, huh?

Uh-huh.

 

[semen4her]

If I was in charge they'd just sell bags of the filling. Fuck a bunch of cookie.

I was thinking that selling the cookies with only one cookie half and the icing on it. Lose the top cookie all together. I usually end up with half a dozen or so leftover cookie tops, it's just waste and it's uncalled for.

 

[semen4her]

the chocolate ones are made of happiness molecules harvested from the heart of a unicorn cub.

that's right. unicorns have cubs. don't doubt it.

No.

No.

 

[CHNOPS]

All I know is, from the time our kids ate their first Oreo cookie, they knew to screw the top off and eat the icing first. It must be genetic.

 

[semen4her]

Your wife, huh?

Uh-huh.

I didn't marry her for her brains.

 

[semen4her]

This is what she came home with!

W. T. F. ?

http://postmedialeaderpost.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/birthday-cake-oreo.jpg

 

[KRCummings]

Clearly you need to consider divorce or a good place to dispose of the body.

 

[CHNOPS]

This is what she came home with!

W. T. F. ?

http://postmedialeaderpost.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/birthday-cake-oreo.jpg

Show that to any judge in the country and you won't be convicted if you kill her.

 

[Sean Renaud]

They now have peanut butter ones like the girl scouts sell.

 

[CHNOPS]

Fucking KRC.

 

[Bert Notorius]

http://www.photopumpkin.com/wp-content/uploads/bald-monkey-4.gif

 

[KRCummings]

Show that to any judge in the country and you won't be convicted if you kill her.

"Birthday cake flavored Oreos, Judge! Come the fuck on!"

 

[CHNOPS]

Bert's 'Nipples is bald' campaign is catching on like gangbusters!

 

[semen4her]

lmao!

I may use that some day.

Thanks, tubby!

 

[neci]

http://www.mylactatingtits.com/images/milking-boobs.jpg

 

[CHNOPS]

"Birthday cake flavored Oreos, Judge! Come the fuck on!"

"Not self-defense, you say? Then how do you explain....THIS?!" Lawyer whips out the box, courtroom gasps, jurors weep at the horror, Nipples walks away clean.

 

[Sean Renaud]

They're actually pretty good if you like cake flavored stuff.

 

[CHNOPS]

They're actually pretty good if you like cake flavored stuff.

You know what's really good that is cake-flavored?

Cake.