Handjobs and Blowjobs

[AngusMan]

My silly pet seems to be having a problem asking questions of the more experienced members here, so I will ask them for her.

The situation is that she was supposed to give me either a blowjob or handjob this past weekend, and failed to do either. She was just too shy. So, her "punishment" is to write a paper on blowjobs or handjobs.

Here are her questions:
1. How do I go about giving either a blowjob or handjob?
2. Are there any importants bits of info I should know?
3. Why should I give him either one? (No, because you were orded to, answers.)

 

[BiBunny]

Oh, good God. If you're too "shy" to discuss sex or your issues surrounding sex that prevent you from performing with your partner, then you have no business engaging in a sexual relationship, much less a BDSM one.

 

[ownedsubgal]

we cannot answer any of those questions. the answers to those questions are unique to the one she serves. in other words, these are things one is taught and trained by one's Dominant, not questions asked of random internet strangers.

 

[vintage63]

I understand that she is shy. We have no idea what her experience is and some people are more she than others.
My question is why the heck would you punish her for it. You will probably have a better sexual relationship if you talk to her about it. I think you pet is not the silly one.

 

[Bandit58]

Oh, good God. If you're too "shy" to discuss sex or your issues surrounding sex that prevent you from performing with your partner, then you have no business engaging in a sexual relationship, much less a BDSM one.

Bunny, in a previous thread he started (New to BDSM) he states they've only been dating for a month and have only seen each other on weekends, so it's a pretty new relationship. Also he's far more sexually experienced than she is so no wonder she is shy. Hell I'm still shy sometimes and it's been 7 years

1. How do I go about giving either a blowjob or handjob?

With enthusiasm, even if you're not very good at it yet Your man will direct you as to what he likes, try to follow his instructions. Apparently I'm too gentle when giving a handjob - Sir tells me that I won't pull it off even if I think I'm being too rough

2. Are there any importants bits of info I should know?

Watch the teeth. Scraping Sir's penis with teeth is not a good idea (unless he likes it of course).

3. Why should I give him either one? (No, because you were orded to, answers.)

Because you want to be pleasing and to please him. Because YOU enjoy doing it as much as he enjoys receiving.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Instruction is nice, but one learns by doing.

 

[sb2009]

Welll, I've given a few of each in my lifetime...and i learn best by instant and frequent feedback.

 

[BiBunny]

Bunny, in a previous thread he started (New to BDSM) he states they've only been dating for a month and have only seen each other on weekends, so it's a pretty new relationship. Also he's far more sexually experienced than she is so no wonder she is shy. Hell I'm still shy sometimes and it's been 7 years

I don't think that's an excuse not to be proactive about taking care of issues in one's relationship, sexual or otherwise, as they arise. People tell high school kids that if they aren't comfortable talking about sex, they have no business having it, so why should that be different with adults?

 

[CutieMouse]

Okay.

You wanted either a blow job or hand job, and asked your submissive partner to take care of that.

She refused citing shyness.

Instead of gently helping her overcome her shyness and taking the opportunity to teach her what you like re: oral and/or handjobs, you decided to punish her with a research assignment.

And then when she decided she was too shy to do her own research, you decided to help do the research for her by posting your research questions for her.

Who exactly is running the show here?

I remember the first time I was asked to give head. I was 19, innocent as the day was long, and responded with "People DO THAT?!? But pee cones out of there!" I was afraid to even touch the thing. lol

 

[sb2009]

Okay.


I remember the first time I was asked to give head. I was 19, innocent as the day was long, and responded with "People DO THAT?!? But pee cones out of there!" I was afraid to even touch the thing. lol

god I remember those days....put it where? MY MOUTH????? WHAT??????

 

[CutieMouse]

god I remember those days....put it where? MY MOUTH????? WHAT??????

I know, right? 20 years later and I have lovers saying my mouth could easily be the solution to world peace. lol

 

[BiBunny]

Okay.

You wanted either a blow job or hand job, and asked your submissive partner to take care of that.

She refused citing shyness.

Instead of gently helping her overcome her shyness and taking the opportunity to teach her what you like re: oral and/or handjobs, you decided to punish her with a research assignment.

And then when she decided she was too shy to do her own research, you decided to help do the research for her by posting your research questions for her.

Who exactly is running the show here?

That was my next thought.

 

[Marquis]

Blowjobs are tantamount to a healthy D/s relationship.

 

[neci]

My silly pet seems to be having a problem asking questions of the more experienced members here, so I will ask them for her.

The situation is that she was supposed to give me either a blowjob or handjob this past weekend, and failed to do either. She was just too shy. So, her "punishment" is to write a paper on blowjobs or handjobs.

Here are her questions:
1. How do I go about giving either a blowjob or handjob?
2. Are there any importants bits of info I should know?
3. Why should I give him either one? (No, because you were orded to, answers.)

has she ever given you a handjob or blowjob?

i don't understand why you don't sit down on the couch and have a conversation. if she's not ready to do it, maybe she's not ready yet. maybe she was hoping you would beat her ass or force her to do it. hell. i don't know. why don't you two just try relaxing a bit, and see where you naturally go? if she had the whole weekend to do this, why did you not correct the behavior while it was happening. so many questions. oh. by posting her threads for her, you are enabling her to not reach out herself.

you're air force, correct?
if your commanding officer gave you an assignment, would he wait all weekend for you to finish, then say oh, well, write me a paper? more questions.

why should she give you one? if you can't answer that one yourself, you don't deserve to have your cock sucked. she needs to discover why from you. in the end, i don't know why they why should really matter, as long as it's getting done.

 

[rekane]

I saw the best movie about handjobs.

It was called "Irina Palm", starring Marianne Faithfull.

It was really a good movie.

 

[seela]

Was she supposed to initiate the handjob or blowjob herself or was she just supposed to give you one during sex? If the problem was with initiating said activities, maybe a better way to go with your writing assignment would be to think about why it's difficult for her to do it rather than to go on about technicalities of the said activities. Just a suggestion.

My problem in similar situations has always been my incapability to initiate sex of any kind. It isn't so much about not feeling confident in my skills, but I feel utterly stupid and uncomfortable starting the activity. I'm still a complete spazz when it comes to making the first moves towards sex and we've been together for several years. I tend to make it a joke-ish kind of situation, because I feel so out of water doing that. I keep waiting for a perfect moment or something, and I've come to notice there is no perfect moment for me to initiate sex. I feel uncomfortable doing it no matter what.

Punishments in those situations probably wouldn't have been very helpful for me, but we don't do punishments so I'm not sure how it would have gone over. Coaxing, talking, encouraging on the other hand has worked and I'm now at a point where I can initiate sex, even if it's in a very clumsy and idiotic manner, always very much thought out and planned and never, ever spontaineous. I have to make a conscious decision after realizing that "hmm, I haven't initiated sex in two weeks, I think he's expecting it of me now" and then stick with my decision. It's not exactly a question of lust so strong burning in my loins that I just can't keep my hands off of him. Even if the burning lust happened to be there, I'd still have to make a very conscious decision and think it through before doing it.

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

Why should you give head or handjobs?

Shouldn't the question be, why shouldn't you?

 

[the captians wench]

we cannot answer any of those questions. the answers to those questions are unique to the one she serves. in other words, these are things one is taught and trained by one's Dominant, not questions asked of random internet strangers.

I've always been of this mind, and when I have a new lover, I take time to learn what he likes.

This is really funny timing, because I was just thinking of one such occations. Very fondly.

Why should you give head or handjobs?

Shouldn't the question be, why shouldn't you?

Hehehe, again, of the same mind

 

[Lizzie_Borden]

I've always been of this mind, and when I have a new lover, I take time to learn what he likes.

Having only had a long term relationship that didn't include sex in the conventional PIV/anal/blowjobs kind of way and a few random one night stands where you don't really take the time to get to know each other, Mr was my first for a lot of things. It was all very new. I learned a lot. And he never once got cranky when I'd stop in the middle and ask a question.

And you know, that actually helped solidify our relationship. Not only were we learning each other in bed, he was helping me to learn how to communicate openly and to trust him. It helped me build confidence. It let us sink into a deeper level of intimacy.

 

[DVS]

I know, right? 20 years later and I have lovers saying my mouth could easily be the solution to world peace. lol

OMG, why do you torture me like this? Quick, somebody declare war, so we can negotiate peace.

 

[subwannabe]

You really need to find a sub who is older than 13.

 

[wicked woman]

Okay.

You wanted either a blow job or hand job, and asked your submissive partner to take care of that.

She refused citing shyness.

Instead of gently helping her overcome her shyness and taking the opportunity to teach her what you like re: oral and/or handjobs, you decided to punish her with a research assignment.

And then when she decided she was too shy to do her own research, you decided to help do the research for her by posting your research questions for her.

Who exactly is running the show here?

I remember the first time I was asked to give head. I was 19, innocent as the day was long, and responded with "People DO THAT?!? But pee cones out of there!" I was afraid to even touch the thing. lol

QFT


In addition, I've been told I give very good blow jobs, so why oh why should I do your pet's punishment? I disagree with your approach in giving her punishment for this, but since you did, she should be writing this, not us.

Where's your head man?

 

[the captians wench]

Having only had a long term relationship that didn't include sex in the conventional PIV/anal/blowjobs kind of way and a few random one night stands where you don't really take the time to get to know each other, Mr was my first for a lot of things. It was all very new. I learned a lot. And he never once got cranky when I'd stop in the middle and ask a question.

And you know, that actually helped solidify our relationship. Not only were we learning each other in bed, he was helping me to learn how to communicate openly and to trust him. It helped me build confidence. It let us sink into a deeper level of intimacy.

I think that last bit is what I enjoy most. I was quite shy when I first met an uncut cock, and very curious. It was an amazing experience, a great deal because he was so willing to teach as well as let me play and explore, and he was a safe place to be vulnerable in.

Very fond memory indeed.

 

[ownedsubgal]

My problem in similar situations has always been my incapability to initiate sex of any kind. It isn't so much about not feeling confident in my skills, but I feel utterly stupid and uncomfortable starting the activity. I'm still a complete spazz when it comes to making the first moves towards sex and we've been together for several years. I tend to make it a joke-ish kind of situation, because I feel so out of water doing that. I keep waiting for a perfect moment or something, and I've come to notice there is no perfect moment for me to initiate sex. I feel uncomfortable doing it no matter what.

do you have to initiate sex at all? i mean, is that something he has demanded of you? if so, i understand and admire how you have grown to overcome this block, even with great difficulty. but if it's not something he cares about one way or the other, then i would wonder why you'd put yourself through such angst.

i have never initiated sex with my Master or anyone else...not one time. if all of a sudden it were demanded of me, even a once a month, or once a year thing...i think my head would frickin explode, lol.

 

[hungdavid]

http://www3.picturepush.com/photo/a/5176191/img/5176191.jpg