How did you know...

[unsureofherself]

So my question... and my first post so play nice ...

What were your first thoughts/feelings/reactions that made you realise that you were PyL?

and as a follow on...

what behaviours do you see in others that make you suspect that they are pYl?

(and I guess I am meaning the more subtle stuff than a leather clad woman with thigh high boots, flogger in hand saying 'On your knees slave!')



Looking forward to hearing all your thoughts...

x

 

[unsureofherself]

oops I meant first thread not first post

 

[Braschi]

PyL? pYl?

 

[CutieMouse]

PyL? pYl?

PYL= dominant/master/top

pyl= submissive/slave/bottom

 

[unsureofherself]

and there was me thinking my lurking reading days had been helpful!!

PYL - pick your label...

 

[Braschi]

OK, switching to serious, then.

For me, I think it was more of a processes, not a specific moment/thing. Or, probably more accurately, I was just me and eventually came across the definition of Dom and it kind of fit, in a weird way.

As for others? I don't notice very many ... well, PLY is pretty broad, so I do come across quite a few Aseholes (TM). People who think they are Dominant/Master/God, but are just self-centred and arrogant. Since I don't like them, I don't pay much attention to them, so I can't say really what it is that irks me Though I do know several people who are "leaderly", if you want to pick that term, who command the trust and respect of their fellows. It's not sexual, but I do think they deserve some sort of PYL.

As for pyl, there seems to be quite an abundance of those, and not just those that recognize it as a lifestyle. Usually I notice people who say things like, "I like having a job instead of running a company, because then I know how much I'm going to be paid at the end of the month". Of course, that's not sexual, either...

 

[happychatter]

and there was me thinking my lurking reading days had been helpful!!

PYL - pick your label...

I wondered what it meant too. But then I'm not much into labels LOL

 

[where]

I think it's a bit presumptous to assume you can tell a person's sexuality from their outward day to day behaviour. I know guys who run large companies that get off on begging me for my used knickers and most people who meet me, if they make an assumption about my dominance or not, usually think of me as being dom.

 

[evelmartini]

I've had women say "yes sir to me" I always think that they are sub in their private lives.

Having said that my experiences with submissive women is that a lot of them are not at all submissive in their day to day lives.

 

[CutieMouse]

As for pyl, there seems to be quite an abundance of those, and not just those that recognize it as a lifestyle. Usually I notice people who say things like, "I like having a job instead of running a company, because then I know how much I'm going to be paid at the end of the month". Of course, that's not sexual, either...

Or maybe they got tired of putting in 90 hour weeks that left them no time to actually enjoy life.

 

[YourCaptor]

I once met a chick that introduced the guy with her as belonging to her. Nothing else about her really said much in the direction of PYL. She was confident, and not avoidant of confrontation. I suppose that was intimidating to some of the guys that were with, but it’s more of the norm for the women I grew up with.

So I’d say she was a sweet girl seemingly ignorant to the submissive female role in this society.

We got along great, it was really nice being able to talk about sex without someone thinking you’re weird. I think if we had sex I still would have been on top. But I’ll never know, I lost my phone that night along with her number.

 

[DVS]

I wondered what it meant too. But then I'm not much into labels LOL

That's part of the idea behind PYL/pyl. It's a generic shortcut.

 

[Braschi]

Or maybe they got tired of putting in 90 hour weeks that left them no time to actually enjoy life.

Well, there are those, too. That's perfectly understandable. But I know a lot of people who just aren't into taking any sort of responsibility, and prefer that someone tell them what to do. They're decent, hard-working people, of course. They just can't "be in charge" as it were.

That's part of the idea behind PYL/pyl. It's a generic shortcut.

Well, we capitalize one to differentiate between the two. But it gets confusing when you start mixing up the capitalization...

 

[MisterSir]

But I know a lot of people who just aren't into taking any sort of responsibility, and prefer that someone tell them what to do. They're decent, hard-working people, of course. They just can't "be in charge" as it were.

And extrapolating that these people's lack of desire to be in charge permeates every facet of their life doesn't strike you as the tiniest bit of a generalisation?

 

[Braschi]

And extrapolating that these people's lack of desire to be in charge permeates every facet of their life doesn't strike you as the tiniest bit of a generalisation?

It is.

But since we like labels so much, maybe we can find one for them?