As a Domme, I'm feeling...alone? But perhaps that's not the best word.

[Lady_In_Black]

Let me clarify here, I'm using the word "alone" because any others just sound awkward in a sentence. In solitary? Isolated? That last one implies some sort of action.

I was isolate. I'm being isolated. And that's not true.

So while I'm having a hard time finding the right word; the general idea is I feel like I'm all alone. Plenty of people around me but no one else is like me?

I guess that is the best way to describe it. I know it's a bit silly, my logical brain is telling me I'm wrong. I know there are lots of Dominant women, and submissive men, and gay submissive women...

I just can't seem to find any! I'm not looking for a partner, or a play thing, anything like that. I think I just need to know I'm not the odd-man-out?

It seems like almost everyone on this board is a Dominant man/submissive female, or a gay submissive man and their counterpart.

Are there other people here aligned like me?

Just give me a shot out so I can quiet down the irrational part of my mind?

 

[Zenon65802]

Shouts,
You are not alone.
straight switch male,
not looking for anything other than conversation
Feel free to contact me

 

[switchbitch]

You are definitely not alone. I am a switch who switches more dominant than submissive and I am a bisexual female. Love to talk if you want to.
Where was your avatar photograph taken the landscape looks familiar?

 

[Lady_In_Black]

Thank you guys, this helps, a lot!

switchbitch: Where was my avatar taken? I'm not sure, I can't even see my avatar!
Edit: Ah, I see. That's taken at Mt. Tamborine (I've spelled that horribly wrong) in QLD, AU.

 

[switchbitch]

Thank you guys, this helps, a lot!

switchbitch: Where was my avatar taken? I'm not sure, I can't even see my avatar!
Edit: Ah, I see. That's taken at Mt. Tamborine (I've spelled that horribly wrong) in QLD, AU.

NO wonder its familiar I used to live there LOL small world

 

[switchbitch]

NO wonder its familiar I used to live there LOL small world

Spelled correctly by the way

 

[Stella_Omega]

I'm female, queer, non-submissive, switch, pillow queen.

This board is pretty heteronormative, but some of us are making ourselves as visible as we can...

Pleasure to meet you!

 

[Lady_In_Black]

All of these people coming out of the woodwork is a real mood lifter. Thank you everyone.

Really.

switchbitch: I'm original from the Midwest in the US, but now I'm living a pretty normal life with my husband, here. Bless him, he knows all about my kinks, my sexuality, and my fetishes, and he's comfortable with them. But he's from the area, originally. Mt T is one of my favorite places around. Is it a nice area to live in? I'd imagine it's cooler there then it is here! *swoons at the thought of a cool breeze*

I'd like to think that living on Mt. T would mean the difference between 14 eyelet Docs, and the 20 eyelet Docs I so desperately wish it was cool enough to wear.

What a confused paragraph I've just written!

Stella: I'd never heard the term Pillow Queen before, I had to look it up. Apparently that's me too. Shame on me.

I loath the idea of being a minority of a minority in a minority. It makes me feel like I need to paint "Dominant Sadist Bisexual-Woman" on my forehead to advertise myself to other people just so I can make friends with people who share the same interests in that part of life.

I've always come off as "normal, but slightly wired", which I hate because A: Serial Killer Description right there, and B: I can't seem to work my way into the GBLT community, or the BDSM community. Not that I can FIND the communities to begin with.

By the by, if I may say so...What a lovely 'stash you have!

Zenon: glad to know there's some men in here aligned too!

 

[TheCarver]

You're not alone Lady. There are a ton of us.

 

[Stella_Omega]

You're not alone Lady. There are a ton of us.

You're a female dom/top?

Whoah, dude, who knew?

But I'll tell you where you and I intersect, which is in wood carving.

 

[CarnageSIS]

Definitely not alone, but I can understand what your saying. Everytime I run into a male submissive I hear about the tough time they have finding female dommes.

I would classify myself as a switch though usually Dominant and only very selectively submissive. Also very much on the outskirts of things, not very serious at least for now.

 

[TheCarver]

You're a female dom/top?

Whoah, dude, who knew?

But I'll tell you where you and I intersect, which is in wood carving.

No. I'm saying that I'm a switch and that I understand having a really hard time finding a good mate.

 

[Stella_Omega]

No. I'm saying that I'm a switch and that I understand having a really hard time finding a good mate.

Ah, I hear that.

 

[YourCaptor]

Often I'm glad I'm alone, cause if their were more like me, the world would be a much darker place.

 

[fla_guy22]

Heterosexual male here, switch but more submissive than anything

 

[Ravenwind]

Bi- sub woman, here. Not quite what you had in mind, but might I say, "close enough"?

 

[where]

I thought that Dommes were in short supply. just going by the numerous threads from male subs looking for one.

but pillow queen.... can someone essentially subby also be a pillow queen?

 

[talismania]

You are definitely not alone! I'm also a Domme by orientation in a conventional marriage to a man who is deliciously submissive in all the ways I most love.

It so happens, I am also from the U.S. Midwest. People here on the East Coast where I now live have this image of Midwesterners as being stodgy and conservative but... I think Midwesterners are a lot more sexually adventurous than their reputation would have it.

I sometimes say I'm a switch... but I'm really not. I just realized I'm a pillow queen! When I switch, I mean. Mostly I like to take control and ravish the lovely man. But pillow queen, yeah. I'll be chuckling all day at that.

So yeah, you have company. I guess the conversations in the forum aren't always the sort we want to jump into, but there are quite a few intelligent dominant women in this forum.

 

[Stella_Omega]

I thought that Dommes were in short supply. just going by the numerous threads from male subs looking for one.

but pillow queen.... can someone essentially subby also be a pillow queen?

Yes, of course!

See, this is why I have a problem with the term "sub" being used as the default term.

You might not be "submissive" in the dictionary sense of the word. You might be a needy little bitch who craves sensation and attention. You might be a little bit passive, activity-wise, and prefer to be the done-unto rather than the doer. You might be perfectly willing to take directions if it gets you what you want.

You might even be service-oriented, and want to take care of your partner. But you can be all of that without being "submissive."

 

[BeeBeestoy]

Let me clarify here, I'm using the word "alone" because any others just sound awkward in a sentence. In solitary? Isolated? That last one implies some sort of action.

I was isolate. I'm being isolated. And that's not true.

So while I'm having a hard time finding the right word; the general idea is I feel like I'm all alone. Plenty of people around me but no one else is like me?

I guess that is the best way to describe it. I know it's a bit silly, my logical brain is telling me I'm wrong. I know there are lots of Dominant women, and submissive men, and gay submissive women...

I just can't seem to find any! I'm not looking for a partner, or a play thing, anything like that. I think I just need to know I'm not the odd-man-out?

It seems like almost everyone on this board is a Dominant man/submissive female, or a gay submissive man and their counterpart.

Are there other people here aligned like me?

Just give me a shot out so I can quiet down the irrational part of my mind?

Hello strait male, sub with dominate outward personality. Married to my D/. Don't feel alone, feel privileged to have a wild side. let everyone else live in their cage.

 

[SimonBrooke]

I thought that Dommes were in short supply. just going by the numerous threads from male subs looking for one.

but pillow queen.... can someone essentially subby also be a pillow queen?

It's always been my impression in the community that the female dominant, male submissive pairing was slightly more common than the other way around. Am I just wrong?

 

[where]

Yes, of course!

See, this is why I have a problem with the term "sub" being used as the default term.

You might not be "submissive" in the dictionary sense of the word. You might be a needy little bitch who craves sensation and attention. You might be a little bit passive, activity-wise, and prefer to be the done-unto rather than the doer. You might be perfectly willing to take directions if it gets you what you want.

You might even be service-oriented, and want to take care of your partner. But you can be all of that without being "submissive."

darling, it's as if you know me!

It's always been my impression in the community that the female dominant, male submissive pairing was slightly more common than the other way around. Am I just wrong?

I'm going by all the personals whereby a female sub can post for a dom and get inundated, but a male sub gets tumbleweed.

which is probably why there are more female professional doms than male ones.

...though it could be argued that men always end up paying, one way or another. if you were very cynical.

 

[Etoile]

Paging Netzach...

 

[Netzach]

Let me clarify here, I'm using the word "alone" because any others just sound awkward in a sentence. In solitary? Isolated? That last one implies some sort of action.

I was isolate. I'm being isolated. And that's not true.

So while I'm having a hard time finding the right word; the general idea is I feel like I'm all alone. Plenty of people around me but no one else is like me?

I guess that is the best way to describe it. I know it's a bit silly, my logical brain is telling me I'm wrong. I know there are lots of Dominant women, and submissive men, and gay submissive women...

I just can't seem to find any! I'm not looking for a partner, or a play thing, anything like that. I think I just need to know I'm not the odd-man-out?

It seems like almost everyone on this board is a Dominant man/submissive female, or a gay submissive man and their counterpart.

Are there other people here aligned like me?

Just give me a shot out so I can quiet down the irrational part of my mind?

You are officially not crazy.

 

[ultramarineblue]

Yes, of course!

See, this is why I have a problem with the term "sub" being used as the default term.

You might not be "submissive" in the dictionary sense of the word. You might be a needy little bitch who craves sensation and attention. You might be a little bit passive, activity-wise, and prefer to be the done-unto rather than the doer. You might be perfectly willing to take directions if it gets you what you want.

You might even be service-oriented, and want to take care of your partner. But you can be all of that without being "submissive."

Some interesting things to think about. I've been thinking a lot about this stuff lately.