Stereotypes

[SDM3]

I kinda metioned this the other day for like 5 seconds, in another thread. Sooo...

Everybody judges each other based on looks. No denial. We ALL do. Just some far more (and much harsher) than others. So, the questions are...

How do people generally stereotype those who are a part of the BDSM culture? Like what you've heard or encountered. This can include people both inside and outside the lifestyle.
How have people responded to you when they've become aware of this?

Basically along those lines. Yes, don't let what other people think bother you, blah blah blah. That's not what I'm getting at. Stereotypes fascinate me because I don't always follow how people's minds work around it. It's something I'm genuinely curious about because I encounter a lot since my outside apparently, I've been told, doesn't remotely match my inside. Umm...yeah. Discuss. Please. I like hearing experiences.

 

[Shaetiano]

I kinda metioned this the other day for like 5 seconds, in another thread. Sooo...

Everybody judges each other based on looks. No denial. We ALL do. Just some far more (and much harsher) than others. So, the questions are...

How do people generally stereotype those who are a part of the BDSM culture? Like what you've heard or encountered. This can include people both inside and outside the lifestyle.
How have people responded to you when they've become aware of this?

Basically along those lines. Yes, don't let what other people think bother you, blah blah blah. That's not what I'm getting at. Stereotypes fascinate me because I don't always follow how people's minds work around it. It's something I'm genuinely curious about because I encounter a lot since my outside apparently, I've been told, doesn't remotely match my inside. Umm...yeah. Discuss. Please. I like hearing experiences.

Well for the first part of you saying we all do, I don't agree with. I've always and still do keep an open mind about everything. I think mainly because of where I grew up and life style I chose growing up. Everyone is different and have a different thought process than the next. But, again this is me and I know everyone is different in their own little ways.

And I've only recently told a certain few just to see what the reaction was because I lost the one person that knew me well enough to crack the shell. So, anyways, just for giggles I talked about it with someone who is a pretty good friend, first reaction was "Wow, really?" Me nodding and going Mhmmm. Them: "That's pretty cool."

Second experience.. Not so good. And in other words I haven't heard back from that person.

But that is life for you in general.

But you know, I think it doesn't have to be advertised and in a way with your group of people/friends/family you kind of already have a general idea of who you might possibly tell or share that with and if not if you really wanna know you are going to take a jump and just see what happens. It could go a few ways, they be ok with it and have and have no problems with you talking about it, they run for the hills screaming (laughs), umm have no problem with it but don't want the details. But I think you get the gist.

I feel like I am rambling so I will stop there. =)

 

[SDM3]

Well for the first part of you saying we all do, I don't agree with. I've always and still do keep an open mind about everything. I think mainly because of where I grew up and life style I chose growing up. Everyone is different and have a different thought process than the next. But, again this is me and I know everyone is different in their own little ways.

And I've only recently told a certain few just to see what the reaction was because I lost the one person that knew me well enough to crack the shell. So, anyways, just for giggles I talked about it with someone who is a pretty good friend, first reaction was "Wow, really?" Me nodding and going Mhmmm. Them: "That's pretty cool."

Second experience.. Not so good. And in other words I haven't heard back from that person.

But that is life for you in general.

But you know, I think it doesn't have to be advertised and in a way with your group of people/friends/family you kind of already have a general idea of who you might possibly tell or share that with and if not if you really wanna know you are going to take a jump and just see what happens. It could go a few ways, they be ok with it and have and have no problems with you talking about it, they run for the hills screaming (laughs), umm have no problem with it but don't want the details. But I think you get the gist.

I feel like I am rambling so I will stop there. =)

I didn't say they were necessarily harsh or negative judgements. I don't even think we always do it consciously. Although, that wasn't really the point.

Also, it's not necessarily about telling people either. Gotta love those surprise moments when people find out on their own, whether from poking around where they shouldn't or just overhear a conversation. I'm digressing.

But...duuuuuuude. What happened with the second one? I know you said you haven't heard from them. But how did they react to that where that would be their ultimate reaction?

And it's ok. I tend to babble and ramble and get off topic a lot. I let my mind wonder a lot and it tends to seep into what I'm doing or talking about.

 

[Shaetiano]

I didn't say they were necessarily harsh or negative judgements. I don't even think we always do it consciously. Although, that wasn't really the point.

Also, it's not necessarily about telling people either. Gotta love those surprise moments when people find out on their own, whether from poking around where they shouldn't or just overhear a conversation. I'm digressing.

But...duuuuuuude. What happened with the second one? I know you said you haven't heard from them. But how did they react to that where that would be their ultimate reaction?

And it's ok. I tend to babble and ramble and get off topic a lot. I let my mind wonder a lot and it tends to seep into what I'm doing or talking about.

This true, about it not always being harsh or negative. Kinda like my sister whom I asked a few questions too and she is one of those people who just says whatever floats your boat. hehe.

The second person. I have a habit of laughing over the memory of it now. I like asking the question "If I say vanilla, what is the first thing you think of?" And from there it went on with a few of "You like what?" *laughs* So, but he just kind of stood there for a long second with this look of I had just told him that the world was ending and he only had so many hours to live kind of look on his face. <-- That kinda look. I feel bad in the end, and me being the person I am, sent a text and email explaining somethings and saying sorry. *shrugs* Some people don't like coming out of that shell, that the world doesn't always tick the way they thought it would.

Though I would have to say I haven't an experience about someone just poking around or over hearing on a conversation. Those would tend to probably go a little better, maybe I think. At least there is some warning somewhere for them.


*grins* Annnnnnd duuuuuuuude... I'm a dudette