The Dream Journal

[Mephistophelily]

To go a somewhat different route from FF's Fantasy thread, this one is a list of those dreams that have left you in awe come morning/waking, whether it be from the pure overwhelming bliss of it, or the absolutely confounding hodgepodge of confusion that it caused.

So what dreams have lingered with you?
..Anything about fellow Litsters? (You don't have to use names.... if you don't want.)


My own coming on in a few.
Since someone has been harassing me for them...

 

[Mephistophelily]

The weirdest nonsexual dream I had was an attempt to save a friend from death row for a murder he didn't commit. The odd part is, it was a litster I've never seen... and the people joining me were other lit folk. We were protesting, trying to bust him out (for some reason, it wasn't a modern jail, but some medieval fortress style thing), do anything we could to save him. The people in the dream were Chas, Unseen, CT, Silver, Tears, Ahren, and the guy were were trying to save: Eazy. Now, I know what ONE of these people look like... but my mind decided to even change that.

I don't remember how that dream ended. It was a few months ago.

 

[Ahren]

I don't remember you mentioning me being in it. Was I hot?

 

[Mephistophelily]

I don't remember you mentioning me being in it. Was I hot?

*laughs*
Mm-hmm.
And your usual blunt self. "Well, we tried, they're not listening to us. You're a nice guy E, but... you're dead. Who wants coffee?"

 

[Mephistophelily]

I have to get this out.

Every night, before I actually go to sleep, my mind wanders.
Its not to the dirty thoughts and questionable things, confusing things I posted previously.

I daydream on my death.
How I'll die. My mind is terrible on this; so many, many things have come up. Cancer. Heart attack. Shot. Just not waking up one day. A car wreck.
The strong belief I'm currently in my midlife; that I'm not going to see past 50. Even that seems a farfetched number in my morbid tired thoughts... Sometimes it thinks 40. Some, I've 2 years left... done by 30.

Someone said something a few months ago about a deceased relative that has lingered with me terribly. "Her life could have been better, and her family could have done it."

What would be said about my family? Could I have made things better for them?
I try. I try so damn hard, and I feel like I accomplish nothing.

30, 40, 50... I don't know. At the least, I've got two years to make something better for these kids. I hope my mind is wrong. I hate to think this way, I hate having these thoughts altogether. I know we all have our mortality, but to keep having it brought up every night hurts and scares me so much.

I want to be happy. I want to be hopeful, not so depressed and upset.
I want better dreams; I want to keep having the ones up there than having to start with this...


Its gone by morning, for the most part. I go back to my usual thoughts, my usual ways... but every night, for at least half an hour... The same things...