Wardrobe Selection

VelvetSin

Really Really Experienced
Joined
Jul 20, 2010
Posts
373
I saw the clothing links in the Library threads to fetish clothing, but I need a few ideas for outfits that are sexy, yet suitable to wear out in public without risking arrest or questionable admission to restaurants and most of those things in that link would probably earn a call to 911 for indecent exposure. Are there any threads I've missed that someone could link, please?

I dress fairly "mainstream" normally and can't quite find anything that fits a middle ground between public attire but still something he'd enjoy and suit what he has in mind. For the sake of context, my SO and I have a weekend planned in two weeks for an introduction to BDSM (he's familiar to it, I'm not but trying it out), and I've been told to find some new things for wear out and about. Private time wardrobe isn't necessary, he's handling those. Could I please get some links or suggestions?
 
To explain what I need in answer to some PMs and others that may have the same questions, I know how to dress sexy for common, everyday events like dinner parties. I'm not a complete idiot as far as that stuff goes. :D Usually anyway unless it comes to stuff like this.

I think he's looking for something more leather/lace that I wouldn't normally wear and since I wouldn't normally wear it, I'm not sure what is "hot" and what is "send the nearby children running, that's way too silly." I guess I'd call what I'm looking for is trashy but classy at the same time. Does that exist? We lack many specialty shops around so I need basic ideas that I can pick up from mainstream stores or that I can order online. I would rather buy in person though to make sure it fits since there is not much time to mail back returns.

Hi Stella. Bottom/sub.

I guess I'm asking what would the typical Dom/me types like to see their subs dress in for a night out on the town? Subs, what do you wear for special nights out?
 
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Heels, a short dress/skirt with a top that shows a little cleavage always works well. Wear matching bra and panties set maybe with garter and stockings. Pay extra attention to hair and make-up. Make sure your toes and fingers are neat and polished, maybe with a bolder color than usual.

The kinkier stuff I save for bedroom use only. I would still out like a sore thumb at my age where I live if I wore it out in public.

Have fun:)
 
Honestly, I think dressing tastefully in dresses that are body-conscious, well fitted and flatter your shape paired with heels is sexy and always appropriate. Wear pretty underwear, garter and stockings, and be well groomed and you'll be hot!
 
Fishnets are more mainstream than they used to be and can vamp up a classy dress. A choker necklace can be a powerful symbol, as can matching bracelets on each wrist. Tall strappy heels can also nod at restraint. Make-up can be a little darker and more sultry. Smudge some dark shadow along your lashline rather than use a precise liner and invest in a suitably decadent shimmering lipgloss that makes your mouth look sinful. With trashy clothes, this stuff would look stupid but when paired with something elegant, it adds an edge without going over the top. Your classy dress should be something black, red or some other sexy colour that your guy will associate with lingerie. You know what suits your figure best and if you wear a dress you're comfortable with, you'll carry off the vampy touches rather than feeling and looking awkward.
 
someone once told me that clothing they find sexy on women is anything that hints at the idea that "I thought of sex when I got dressed this morning" and that made sense to me....

I also am a big proponent of the 1/2 rule - one sexy thing, two simple things. I use that for place settings, flatware and crystal too LOL
 
I am a huge fan of a corset paired with a skirt suit.

My skirt suit is pin stripe, so that with my corset, and a "ganster" hat and I feel hot as hell. Stockings depend on my mood, either nutral or fishnet. What I'd love to get is a pair of red heals, that would just complete the whole thing.
 
My public fetish wear is kind of goth, so I wear black tutus and lace up boots etc, things that are sexy but decent, that I wouldn't normally wear for a night out with the girls. I have a top that I bought from an op shop, it's like a cross between a sleeveless top and a corset. It laces up the front so how tightly it is tied up at the top determines how much cleavage will show. It's different enough because of the laces to not look mainstream but covers enough to be publicly decent.
 
I have a top that I bought from an op shop, it's like a cross between a sleeveless top and a corset. It laces up the front so how tightly it is tied up at the top determines how much cleavage will show. It's different enough because of the laces to not look mainstream but covers enough to be publicly decent.

Thanks for all the suggestions!

This is something like what I'm looking for for right now.

I do the nice dresses and kinda short skirts for work all the time so I could just pull those out of the closet. I have to do the professional thing Monday through Friday and sometimes need to do dinner parties. I've done the fishnets with a dress after work to vamp up an outfit for a date when there was no time to change. He's seen that stuff. I do pure casual wear at home where we relax, but I know that won't work either.

A top like the one quoted sounds like something new and different. Do you have a link to something similar, or more suggestions? I either need to find it online or need to find something like it in the regular stores locally.
 
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A lot of women can sometimes forget how important it is to remain well manicured and "done" for the Doms who really enjoy this sort of woman. For Doms who like their girls to be well-kept, making sure your hair is neat and feminine, your nails are kept long and painted, and your toes are done is very important. Smooth skin and a clear complexion is also very important for the "done" look. Being manicured is quite basic, but a totally necessary part of the ultra-sexy look that your Dom is probably reaching for.

Mister, my husband, really likes the "done" look on women, and we actually budget a portion of our income to keep me in the salon on a regular basis. My hair gets trimmed and styled, sometimes highlighted, my nails (acrylic) are filled and painted, sometimes I get my legs waxed, sometimes I get a pedicure, or a facial.

Clothes are very important, but neglected toes or unkempt hair can ruin a look faster than anything. Remember to fix your body up first before you worry about clothes!
 
If you google for "clubwear" you will find some stuff...I have browsed clothes that way.
 
I think he's looking for something more leather/lace that I wouldn't normally wear and since I wouldn't normally wear it, I'm not sure what is "hot" and what is "send the nearby children running, that's way too silly." I guess I'd call what I'm looking for is trashy but classy at the same time. Does that exist? We lack many specialty shops around so I need basic ideas that I can pick up from mainstream stores or that I can order online. I would rather buy in person though to make sure it fits since there is not much time to mail back returns.

Hi Stella. Bottom/sub.

I guess I'm asking what would the typical Dom/me types like to see their subs dress in for a night out on the town?
There's only one response on this thread that sounds appealing to me, and some that are active turnoffs. But what appeals to me is irrelevant. You're asking the wrong people.

If you want ideas about what will make him hot, ask him. If he wants to be surprised, then pick out something that makes you feel confident & sexy.
 
Fishnets are more mainstream than they used to be and can vamp up a classy dress. A choker necklace can be a powerful symbol, as can matching bracelets on each wrist. Tall strappy heels can also nod at restraint. Make-up can be a little darker and more sultry. Smudge some dark shadow along your lashline rather than use a precise liner and invest in a suitably decadent shimmering lipgloss that makes your mouth look sinful. With trashy clothes, this stuff would look stupid but when paired with something elegant, it adds an edge without going over the top. Your classy dress should be something black, red or some other sexy colour that your guy will associate with lingerie. You know what suits your figure best and if you wear a dress you're comfortable with, you'll carry off the vampy touches rather than feeling and looking awkward.

Nice.

Add gstring thong and you're golden.
 
A lot of women can sometimes forget how important it is to remain well manicured and "done" for the Doms who really enjoy this sort of woman.

I do much of this stuff anyway because I like to look nice day to day. I don't like looking in the mirror and seeing a mess look back at me. For dates or special events I'll go above and beyond to cater to what he goes nuts over, but I don't think I'm suited to anything full-time 24/7 where I'd need to fawn every second to fit some fantasy, and I think he'd find that annoying. If that's what's required to mesh with all this, maybe it's not my "thing."


If you want ideas about what will make him hot, ask him. If he wants to be surprised, then pick out something that makes you feel confident & sexy.

I did ask but he's looking for the surprise to see where I'll go on my own for when we're out in public. I have a vision in my head but couldn't find the right search keys to bring up the right things in Google so was mainly looking for suggestions that might come close.

"Clubwear" found a few good prospects - thanks Etoile!
 
I do much of this stuff anyway because I like to look nice day to day. I don't like looking in the mirror and seeing a mess look back at me. For dates or special events I'll go above and beyond to cater to what he goes nuts over, but I don't think I'm suited to anything full-time 24/7 where I'd need to fawn every second to fit some fantasy, and I think he'd find that annoying. If that's what's required to mesh with all this, maybe it's not my "thing."

It's not required unless he tells you it is. There are no hard and fast rules in BDSM, your relationship is unique like everyone elses.

Sorry to have bothered you.
 
Try Japanese/Korean styles

The American "dance" scene style seems too tacky to be truly sexy.

Have you ever looked into Japanese or Korean dress styles? The are incredibly sensual and appeal to my tastes. Given how you describe your dom, I'm certain he would love to have you dressed this way.

I would love to share my tastes with you, if you think this is something you could imagine yourself wearing...

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So sensual, and yet so provocative..
 
None of my 'going out' wardrobe is actually fetish, though the leather halter top tends to push it a bit.

One thing I discovered quickly, is it's all a matter of where you're going and how you match 'normal' clothes.

A black dress skirt will give one impression when paired with V necked blouse that shows hints of the lace on the black bra under it. Pair the same black dress skirt with ballerina fishnets and a corset top and it's a *whole* different story. Same with the ballerina fishnets, by the way. They can be either extremely endearing with a hint of nievity, or they could be slut level trashy... all depends on how it's paired.

Find out where on the scale your PYL wants you (some prefer the classic over the slutty, and vice-versa) and then hit the second hand/thrift shops. It's amazing what you can find for a reasonable price.

And for corset tops and fishnets and such in larger sizes, I'd try try Torrid (but check their clearance racks before the regular racks... they aren't cheap.)
 
Find out where on the scale your PYL wants you (some prefer the classic over the slutty, and vice-versa) and then hit the second hand/thrift shops. It's amazing what you can find for a reasonable price.

Mon-Fri, 9-5 he sees my wardrobe classic and professional. When it's His time, he was impressed by that black dressed linked. I found a similar one today in a local shop I'd never stopped by, and enough other finds that I think I'm set for the trip. Can't wait! :)

Thank you for the help, ya'll!
 
My going-out attire usually has strong notes of dieselpunk, cyberpunk, and everything "wasteland-y" in between as I seem to carry myself and dress more like a Tank Girl kind of pyl than some kind of barbie. (Then again, I like to think I wear bullet belts, spray-painted wife beaters, and combat boots better than most girls.) 'Sides: looking tough makes getting your ass kicked in the bedroom all the more fun~
 
There's only one response on this thread that sounds appealing to me, and some that are active turnoffs. But what appeals to me is irrelevant. You're asking the wrong people.

If you want ideas about what will make him hot, ask him. If he wants to be surprised, then pick out something that makes you feel confident & sexy.

Okay, as a card carrying member of the JM fan club I have to ask:

Which one perked your interest? ;)
 
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