metajinx
Virgin
- Joined
- Oct 23, 2009
- Posts
- 18
Hello there!
It has been 10 years since I've first gotten aroused by the thought of being dominated. There was this pretty nice moment when a good friend showed me my first Hentai and I realized that it turned me on to see those innocent little girls getting manhandled and used in any way their captors wished to... ah well.
Since this is a "board to talk", I assumed it would be alright to ask for something like advice, opinions, guesses regarding to a few (hehe) problems and thoughts I've collected over the years. Please bear in mind that I can't speak from my own experience, since I haven't got any
Also please excuse my grammar, I know it sounds like gibberish to some extent - it's late here and I'm out of practice
Problem #1: Damn, how do you find those people!
Ok, I had 10 years to find people interested in D/S B/S stuff. I also tried to get to know some, but 2 little details stopped me from really getting into the "right circles".
One: Most of the people hanging out in those nifty BDSM clubs (we got a pretty lovely one in Vienna) are WAY older than I am - we're talking about 30+ years older than me. It does get really creepy when you're a 18-20 year old teen and 50 to 60 year old guys hit on you all evening. I stopped going to the clubs when this particular part of my nights out got me alienated too much - they did accept a "no", but being stared at all evening does make you feel uncomfortable at a certain point. I don't mind attention, not at all, don't get me wrong! It was just the way they stared at me, like I was a big warm sex toy with no mind or personality at all, no interest in me as a person to share something kinky and sensual with. I felt like a hooker (in a bad way), so I started avoiding going to places where people with BDSM on their menu meet.
Two: I'm self-reliant and I tend to be dominant outside of the bedroom, doing a pretty decent job on it. My staring contests are legendary (I do manage a pretty decent cold glare), I'm able to discuss and build sound arguments around my opinions, and I'm not shy about speaking up. I don't like being bossed around or handled like a "helpless little girl" outside of erotic moments... a tough little sub I am. Most of my friends would either laugh hysterically or declare anyone crazy who'd try to convince them I'm a submissive at heart. If there is a "boss-position" to take, I get it 99% of the time, without even saying "I want it" - I just seem to take over unconciously.
At the same time I hate meeting people I don't know, I never talk to strangers in clubs or bars, and I nearly never go to events where I don't know anyone. How do you get into "the scene" if you are reluctant to go out, meet people, and try your luck? Additionally, how could I try to convince myself on trying "to just go there"?
I do have got more things to ask, say, discuss or just blurt out, but I'm feeling unconfortably unwell right now so I'll keep them in the back of my mind until later.
It has been 10 years since I've first gotten aroused by the thought of being dominated. There was this pretty nice moment when a good friend showed me my first Hentai and I realized that it turned me on to see those innocent little girls getting manhandled and used in any way their captors wished to... ah well.
Since this is a "board to talk", I assumed it would be alright to ask for something like advice, opinions, guesses regarding to a few (hehe) problems and thoughts I've collected over the years. Please bear in mind that I can't speak from my own experience, since I haven't got any
Also please excuse my grammar, I know it sounds like gibberish to some extent - it's late here and I'm out of practice
Problem #1: Damn, how do you find those people!
Ok, I had 10 years to find people interested in D/S B/S stuff. I also tried to get to know some, but 2 little details stopped me from really getting into the "right circles".
One: Most of the people hanging out in those nifty BDSM clubs (we got a pretty lovely one in Vienna) are WAY older than I am - we're talking about 30+ years older than me. It does get really creepy when you're a 18-20 year old teen and 50 to 60 year old guys hit on you all evening. I stopped going to the clubs when this particular part of my nights out got me alienated too much - they did accept a "no", but being stared at all evening does make you feel uncomfortable at a certain point. I don't mind attention, not at all, don't get me wrong! It was just the way they stared at me, like I was a big warm sex toy with no mind or personality at all, no interest in me as a person to share something kinky and sensual with. I felt like a hooker (in a bad way), so I started avoiding going to places where people with BDSM on their menu meet.
Two: I'm self-reliant and I tend to be dominant outside of the bedroom, doing a pretty decent job on it. My staring contests are legendary (I do manage a pretty decent cold glare), I'm able to discuss and build sound arguments around my opinions, and I'm not shy about speaking up. I don't like being bossed around or handled like a "helpless little girl" outside of erotic moments... a tough little sub I am. Most of my friends would either laugh hysterically or declare anyone crazy who'd try to convince them I'm a submissive at heart. If there is a "boss-position" to take, I get it 99% of the time, without even saying "I want it" - I just seem to take over unconciously.
At the same time I hate meeting people I don't know, I never talk to strangers in clubs or bars, and I nearly never go to events where I don't know anyone. How do you get into "the scene" if you are reluctant to go out, meet people, and try your luck? Additionally, how could I try to convince myself on trying "to just go there"?
I do have got more things to ask, say, discuss or just blurt out, but I'm feeling unconfortably unwell right now so I'll keep them in the back of my mind until later.