Are you a Slut?????

[LitRiter]

Imho

I guess I always thought of a "slut" as one who is indiscriminate in his or her choice of partners.

A woman who has enjoyed sex with many partners but is discriminating in her choice I've always called a "woman". It's the ones with an agenda or some hang-up that limits their freedom that I feel sorry for.

It's all so personal. Why is a woman (or man) who wants to wait and only be with one person somehow better than someone who is more freely expressive of their sexuality? It doesn't make any sense to me, in this day and age.

Now, committing to one person by choice and by mutual agreement is another thing. Promises shouldn't be broken.

I was a slut (not on the list though), became freely expressive, and then committed. Looking back on my history feels like watching evolution in action.

---hoping the commitment thing lasts...

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I guess I always thought of a "slut" as one who is indiscriminate in his or her choice of partners.

A woman who has enjoyed sex with many partners but is discriminating in her choice I've always called a "woman". It's the ones with an agenda or some hang-up that limits their freedom that I feel sorry for.

It's all so personal. Why is a woman (or man) who wants to wait and only be with one person somehow better than someone who is more freely expressive of their sexuality? It doesn't make any sense to me, in this day and age.

Now, committing to one person by choice and by mutual agreement is another thing. Promises shouldn't be broken.

I was a slut (not on the list though), became freely expressive, and then committed. Looking back on my history feels like watching evolution in action.

---hoping the commitment thing lasts...

For starters...disease. And commitment to one person is the optimal arrangement becuz every other combination or permutation is masturbation using another to do it.

 

[Bianca_Sommerland]

For starters...disease. And commitment to one person is the optimal arrangement becuz every other combination or permutation is masturbation using another to do it.

Safe sex is always an option.

And what does sex have to do with commitment? Just because you haven't found your 'one and only' you shouldn't have sex?

Well hell. I'll enjoy using my warm male as a dildo and leave the ball and chain. Using the commitment argument, you might as well stick with the fact that sex...when you get down to it, is for procreation. If you're not doing it for that then you shouldn't be doing it.

I like sex. For no other reason than the feeling of having a nice, hard, warm body pressed against mine, bringing all my senses to life. I sleep with people I know and trust but wouldn't commit to if it was that or death. Why? Because I like being able to roll over after and talk hockey without feeling awkward.

Doesn't work for everyone. That's fine. Part of the thrill is knowing it's not the norm.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Safe sex is always an option.

And what does sex have to do with commitment? Just because you haven't found your 'one and only' you shouldn't have sex?

Well hell. I'll enjoy using my warm male as a dildo and leave the ball and chain. Using the commitment argument, you might as well stick with the fact that sex...when you get down to it, is for procreation. If you're not doing it for that then you shouldn't be doing it.

I like sex. For no other reason than the feeling of having a nice, hard, warm body pressed against mine, bringing all my senses to life. I sleep with people I know and trust but wouldn't commit to if it was that or death. Why? Because I like being able to roll over after and talk hockey without feeling awkward.

Doesn't work for everyone. That's fine. Part of the thrill is knowing it's not the norm.

I've done sex all kinds of ways including your's, and based on my fund of experience I conclude that 'dodge-ball sex' is risky, spiritually corrosive, and no better than masturbation (most of the time), over time it demoralizes most people. Lotsa shit that feels good is bad for us.

 

[Bianca_Sommerland]

I've done sex all kinds of ways including your's, and based on my fund of experience I conclude that 'dodge-ball sex' is risky, spiritually corrosive, and no better than masturbation (most of the time), over time it demoralizes most people. Lotsa shit that feels good is bad for us.

But it's fun while it lasts

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

But it's fun while it lasts

Until you meet someone special who rejects you as an undisciplined hedonist.

 

[CuteBrat]

I've unabashadly been a slut. I've known people thought I was a slut. I've known guyz asked me out because I was a slut and it never failed to turn me on. I've always had my own definition for slut....Sexy, Liberated, and Un-Tamed.....

 

[Bianca_Sommerland]

Until you meet someone special who rejects you as an undisciplined hedonist.

Then they wouldn't be my 'someone special' would they?

I am undisciplined according to some. It's who I am. I won't change that for anyone. If it means no happily ever after then so be it. I don't much believe in that anyway.

 

[CuteBrat]

Then they wouldn't be my 'someone special' would they?

I am undisciplined according to some. It's who I am. I won't change that for anyone. If it means no happily ever after then so be it. I don't much believe in that anyway.

U rock, Sistah!!!

 

[Bianca_Sommerland]

U rock, Sistah!!!

You too! *hugs*

 

[lance gt]

Sounds to me like Jimmy doesn't get laid at all. Here's a thought jimmy, get your special someone out of the closet, put a patch on the hole and blow her up again, then have some fun fucking the shit out her and come back again.

 

[Ravenwind]

While I agree with what James is saying, I don't agree with his reasons... imho only, commitment (to me) means: getting some when I want, where I want it (within reason and legalities and whatnot), and with whom I want. Plus, there's no issues with extra baggage, no embarrassing first dates (beyond that first one), no risk of catching something, no worst-case-scenario worries, and so on.

Regarding LitRiter's statement of "Promises shouldn't be broken"... imho, promises are empty words, meaningless things. Let your yes mean yes, and no mean no, and have your word be your bond... 'tis better to be considered trustworthy all the time, than trustworthy only based upon two easily broken words, "I promise".

On topic... I like the word "sexuelle". It has that flair of elegance to it... it is everything that "slut" is not, and doesn't have that predatory connotation that "seductress" bears. With "slut", I envision an unwashed woman in tattered 80's punk clothes, and would swap partners just because they have Cheetos, or is the 'trophy SO' she wants at the moment... she loves sex, but probably loves Cheetos and headboard notches a little more. "Seductress" feels more like "the woman who hops from man to wealthier man, to get the wealthy lifestyle she seeks"- she is less about sex, and more about wealth and power; sex is merely a means to the ends. "Sexuelle" seems to embody both, having the freedom of the slut and the elegance of the seductress, but without the ulterior motive of monetary/materialistic/notch-in-the-headboard gain- she loves sex, but it is a purely physical, mental, or emotional drive... there is nothing for her to gain except the pleasure of sex itself.

Other words like enchantress and sensuous don't seem to fully grasp the concept of sex itself... too romanticized, imho. Enchantress... merely a gorgeously beautiful woman, where she plays more with your mind than your crotch. A sensuous woman is all into relaxing baths, soft jazz music, and silk... feels more about a woman who sets the mood as opposed to a woman who's already in the mood. ^_~

 

[Zeb_Carter]

For starters...disease. And commitment to one person is the optimal arrangement becuz every other combination or permutation is masturbation using another to do it.

Hey Jim Bob...go back to sleep. So you're say that "you" can't love more than one person at a time? That you must be committed to that one without loving another? And if you love another you must only love them?

 

[LitRiter]

Just to clarify...

I believe I said that in my opinion monogamy outside of commitment was outmoded...but that when making a commitment, be it to one person, two, or three, a commitment should be honored.

If you want to play, don't commit. That's easy.

I never said there shouldn't be sex without commitment. I've never believed it, I wouldn't have said it.

Thanks for listening.

 

[EmmyE]

In my twenties and into my thirties I was one. I got married gave up my slutty ways and then my hubby decides that he wanted a younger version of me. I was too conservative, those were his words. I was like, damn if you wanted me to fuck and not make love to you, all you had to do was ask. I was open to anything, but he wanted a newer model. Oh well, his lose.

Needless to say, I am back to my slutty ways. Most of the time I fuck not because I'm horny, but just to make it know that I can still get the man.

So, I guess my slutness is somewhat empowering.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

In my twenties and into my thirties I was one. I got married gave up my slutty ways and then my hubby decides that he wanted a younger version of me. I was too conservative, those were his words. I was like, damn if you wanted me to fuck and not make love to you, all you had to do was ask. I was open to anything, but he wanted a newer model. Oh well, his lose.

Needless to say, I am back to my slutty ways. Most of the time I fuck not because I'm horny, but just to make it know that I can still get the man.

So, I guess my slutness is somewhat empowering.

Naaah, its something to do until you get some self-esteem.

 

[vrosej10]

Used to be and was damn proud of it! Now I am happily monogamous.

 

[Freefall_mc]

bump...