erotic choking

[longhardcock]

I was with a lady that loved to have my hand around her neck choking her to the point that she would turn red during sex. She would come and come and come while doing this. I have heard it is dangerous and I always paid close attention to her while doing this, it turned me on to no end, I would get rock hard doing it, and most intense orgasms she or I ever had. Would like to hear from both guys and gals that are into this and their experiences.

 

[Betticus]

I was with a lady that loved to have my hard around her neck choking her to the point that she would turn red during sex. She would come and come and come while doing this. I have heard it is dangerous and I always paid close attention to her while doing this, it turned me on to no end, I would get rock hard doing it, and most intense orgasms she or I ever had. Would like to hear from both guys and gals that are into this and their experiences.

I've never had my hard around a womans neck... I've gotten hard while nibbling a womans neck.. Is a hard even a legit body part? I just checked and I don't think I have one. How does it wrap around her neck during sex? Is it like the tentacles in one of those Japanese anime rape movies where a many tentacled beast holds some poor schoolgirl up in the air and rapes her in every hole with its tentacles? You know, one choking her with one in her ass, one in vag, some wrapped around her tits, one throat fucking her and another one rummaging through her bookbag for sweets... If so that would make sense..

 

[longhardcock]

sorry meant hand lol

 

[CutieMouse]

Breathplay is generally considered a rather "edgy" thing, and rightfully so. The smartest thing to do is educate oneself re: hazards and risks... yes, messing with ones blood/oxygen ratio can make climaxes quite intense; it is up to individuals to decide if the risks are worth it.

Asphyxiation

David Carradine, Breathplay, and shoelaces

Strangle Spots and Nosebleeds?

Choking?

Erotic Asphyxiation

Asphyxia: Absolute Control

Breath Play

Library Link to Breathplay threads

Please don't consider the links above to be a shut-down of the conversation; it can often be an interesting one...

Regards,

~M

 

[Betticus]

 

[longhardcock]

ty Cutie I am always open to hearing and reading up on things that I enjoy, I hope that this doesnt become a "dont do it" thread

 

[CutieMouse]

ty Cutie I am always open to hearing and reading up on things that I enjoy, I hope that this doesnt become a "dont do it" thread

How much do you know about asphyxia?

 

[longhardcock]

I have and had read up on it quite a bit after our first time trying it. We both enjoyed it and I wanted to make sure, like anything else, that I was doing it as safely as possible to minimize the risks.

 

[graceanne]

I hope that this doesnt become a "dont do it" thread

Yeah, right. Good luck on that one. lol

 

[RJMasters]

I love the feeling of my hand wrapped around her throat when she is writhing in the throes of passion and lust. Heck sometimes its the only way to keep her still. lol

My gameplan consists of hard and firm grabs early on when foreplay and build-up is occurring. I make sure that when I do grab I open my hand wide and make sure I engulf her whole neck. The palm of your hand should lay against the windpipe and your fingers should squeese the sides of the neck muscles.

As intensity builds I keep my grip more lax. I never cut off the ability to breath, I just make it a struggle to breath. The enjoyment I get is not so much in choking her, but in seeing if she panics or remains calm and takes slow deliberate breaths. I find I get off on either seeing the paniced look or the surrendured look, and often I can use this as a sort of cue as to the tempo of what will come next.

 

[Homburg]

I've never had my hard around a womans neck... I've gotten hard while nibbling a womans neck.. Is a hard even a legit body part? I just checked and I don't think I have one. How does it wrap around her neck during sex? Is it like the tentacles in one of those Japanese anime rape movies where a many tentacled beast holds some poor schoolgirl up in the air and rapes her in every hole with its tentacles? You know, one choking her with one in her ass, one in vag, some wrapped around her tits, one throat fucking her and another one rummaging through her bookbag for sweets... If so that would make sense..

I LOL'ed.

--

ty Cutie I am always open to hearing and reading up on things that I enjoy, I hope that this doesnt become a "dont do it" thread

Don't do it. Really.

Think about it this way. BDSM people do a LOT of shit that other people say "Don't do it!" about. We use knives to cut each other and play with the blood. We play with needles. We do some dangerous, messy shit. So when a whole lot of people into dangerous shit say, "Em, sport, you might not want to do that," what does it say about the activity in question?

--

I have and had read up on it quite a bit after our first time trying it. We both enjoyed it and I wanted to make sure, like anything else, that I was doing it as safely as possible to minimize the risks.

It depends. Are you going for psychological effect alone, and playing the mindfuck like RJ in the post above? Or are you going for heightened orgasm due to lack of oxygen? If it is the former, it can be done with *less* risk. If it is serious asphyxiation, no, it can't be done with minimised risk. It is always fuck-all dangerous.

"Choking" is always dangerous.

 

[Etoile]

Choking requires acknowledgment of RACK, Risk Aware Consensual Kink. You can choke away all you want, but be aware you could kill your partner at any time. As long as you're cool with that, have fun.

 

[graceanne]

I love the feeling of my hand wrapped around her throat when she is writhing in the throes of passion and lust. Heck sometimes its the only way to keep her still. lol

My gameplan consists of hard and firm grabs early on when foreplay and build-up is occurring. I make sure that when I do grab I open my hand wide and make sure I engulf her whole neck. The palm of your hand should lay against the windpipe and your fingers should squeese the sides of the neck muscles.

As intensity builds I keep my grip more lax. I never cut off the ability to breath, I just make it a struggle to breath. The enjoyment I get is not so much in choking her, but in seeing if she panics or remains calm and takes slow deliberate breaths. I find I get off on either seeing the paniced look or the surrendured look, and often I can use this as a sort of cue as to the tempo of what will come next.

.... hot

Yeah, right. Good luck on that one. lol

Don't do it. Really.

See?

 

[DVS]

This sort of thing worries me. Well, I'm a worrier, so that could be why. I just can't be happy thinking I'm doing something that could end up killing my partner.

Oh, I know she's the one that wants me to do this, and it's the edge play and the ultimate control all mixed in with the lack of oxygen that makes the orgasm that much more powerful, but like I said...I'm a worrier.

I'd always be thinking of the "what it" scenario where I didn't do everything just right one time and after I was all finished cuming and telling her how great that just was and she doesn't answer me.

At first I'd think "she's just so totally exhausted because it was such a great sexual experience for her". A little more time would go by...I'd catch my breath and ask her again. Again...no answer and I'd probably be starting to panic by that time. Was this the time I went too far? Was this the time I tried to make it so fucking great for her that I went that little bit too far?

I'd lightly slap her cheeks, in an effort to bring her around. I'd call out her name and maybe shake her a little, my mind starting to race at this point, thinking the worst.

Finally, I realize she's not breathing and time is short. I have to call 911 and start doing CPR on her until they show up. I'm thinking about everything as well as hoping she isn't dead. What does the scene look like to an outsider? Are they going to understand this was just a sexual thing? Are they going to believe me when I say she wanted me to choke her during sex?

By this time, I'm in pure panic mode. I'm wishing it was all a dream, while I continue the CPR. I'm wishing I hadn't agreed to choke her, even though she was the one that wanted it...she even insisted on it.

What if she doesn't survive? What if they don't believe me when I tell them it was just kinky sex? Will they know it was her idea? Will they understand I was just trying to give her the ultimate orgasm?

The EMTs finally show up and I step aside to let them do their job. Reality sets in and I see her laying there, naked. I'm naked. I look around the room, trying to make sense of everything. We've done this many times before and it was a great feeling for both of us.

What happened this time that was different? Did I press too hard on her neck? Did I clamp my hands too long? What did I do this time that I didn't do any other time?

OK, I know this is getting deep. But I did say I was a worrier. I think of these things in my head, when I'm thinking of the "what if" scenario, long before I even agree to something that's dangerous.

I'm very much into electroplay. I know it's dangerous to have electricity around the heart. I know what works and what doesn't. I don't want to find myself in a scenario where I've done something that caused...well, you know what I mean. So, there are things I do that MAKE SURE it won't happen.

Of course, there are some forms of risky play that you can't really guard against the danger. Unlike electroplay, you can't always know when something is too much, or you've gone too far.

I'm sorry, but I just can't bring myself to participate in breath play. Sure, I know it's a very common form of kink and many people enjoy it and live to tell about it the next day. But I also know that if I were to engage in this kind of thing, I'd one day end up killing my sex partner. There's no "if" to it. It would happen.

See? I'm a worrier. I worry about things that can go wrong. And no matter how much I know about something, if there's that slightest chance something will go wrong, I want to be damn well sure I don't let it happen.

So that ultimate orgasm I might try to give her? That scenario where I'm trying to make it even better than the last time, because I want her to have a powerful orgasm? It probably won't ever happen.

I'd hate to be telling the police officer that was what I was trying to accomplish. I'd hate to be sitting there watching the EMTs as they wheel her out of the house and into the ambulance, and the policeman says "OK, let's take it from the beginning. You say she wanted you to choke her?"

See? I'm a worrier. I worry about things that can go wrong.

 

[Etoile]

Super awesome post, DVS.

Basically, if you're going to do breathplay, there is a 50/50 chance that someone will die. Any precautions you might take don't change that number. The number of times you have done it before doesn't change that number. Nothing changes that number. It is a 50% chance.

If the bottom is okay with those odds of dying, and the top is okay with those odds for a manslaughter charge, let them go forth and have fun. Every time you survive, you're a winner.

I love breathplay and choking, nothing gets me hotter. But I'm aware of what could happen. You have to accept it, or don't do it.

 

[ownedsubgal]

if breath restriction/deprivation is something you're doing for purely erotic reasons (i.e. to heighten orgasm), then i personally think it's best if you refrain. and coming from me, one who lives at what some consider to be the "extreme" end of M/s and who often speaks up in support for others to push whatever edge they please with their partners....that says a lot.

the reason why i suggest refraining from this "play" altogether when the motivation is primarily or purely sexual, is because you are not likely to remain alert, aware and in control every second when you are engaging in something that really gets your jollies off. and when it comes to activities which can very easily lead to severe permanent injury or death, you kinda need to be alert, aware and in control every second.

now, breath deprivation is something i have experienced many times and am sure to experience many times in the future. choking, strangling, suffocation. in the case of suffocation, it has been done to the point of my losing consciousness. but NEVER has there been a purely sexual/"ooh this is so hot" motivation behind engaging in such activities. it is much more about ultimate submission and surrender, as RJ so nicely stated, and even trust. the driving force is between the ears and not below the belt. and that, imo makes all the difference.

 

[MisterSir]

Basically, if you're going to do breathplay, there is a 50/50 chance that someone will die. Any precautions you might take don't change that number. The number of times you have done it before doesn't change that number. Nothing changes that number. It is a 50% chance.

nonononoNONO that is not how logic works goddammit. Ye Gods, the amount of times I've seen this used makes every facet of my academic self cry but especially the bit that deals with probability. The same stupid stupid logic applies to saying there's a fifty/fifty shot of you surviving being shot in the head because either it will or it won't happen AND THAT DOESN'T WORK

Rage. I'm sorry, but that's a gigantic pet peeve of mine because it's bad, bad logic.

 

[jockdom]

OOps I thought the thread was about erotic cooking....... makes a sharp exit.

 

[BiaTcHiNFiRe]

OOps I thought the thread was about erotic cooking....... makes a sharp exit.

We can do both really!

I love the feeling of my hand wrapped around her throat when she is writhing in the throes of passion and lust. Heck sometimes its the only way to keep her still. lol

My gameplan consists of hard and firm grabs early on when foreplay and build-up is occurring. I make sure that when I do grab I open my hand wide and make sure I engulf her whole neck. The palm of your hand should lay against the windpipe and your fingers should squeese the sides of the neck muscles.

As intensity builds I keep my grip more lax. I never cut off the ability to breath, I just make it a struggle to breath. The enjoyment I get is not so much in choking her, but in seeing if she panics or remains calm and takes slow deliberate breaths. I find I get off on either seeing the paniced look or the surrendured look, and often I can use this as a sort of cue as to the tempo of what will come next.

Thats a great post RJM! *shivers*



I understand WHY are people worried to do the choking play, but have his hand around my throat is SO HOT!!!

I am not up for passing out from it, but I am deffo up for RJM's way of doing it. It's hot, it's sensual, it's animalistic and I would enjoy it to the bits. Choking, hair pulling and all such things feels so domianant! *RAWRRRR*

 

[SimonBrooke]

Super awesome post, DVS.

Basically, if you're going to do breathplay, there is a 50/50 chance that someone will die. Any precautions you might take don't change that number. The number of times you have done it before doesn't change that number. Nothing changes that number. It is a 50% chance.

If the bottom is okay with those odds of dying, and the top is okay with those odds for a manslaughter charge, let them go forth and have fun. Every time you survive, you're a winner.

I love breathplay and choking, nothing gets me hotter. But I'm aware of what could happen. You have to accept it, or don't do it.

Oh, rubbish. There's a 100% chance that both of you will die, but you'll probably both die of old age far in the distant future. Everyone dies.

On one of the back roads up in the hills north of here there's a little roadside shrine. I always forget where it is, so when I chance upon it it's always a wonderful surprise. It's a memorial to an old cyclist who died suddenly of a heart attack, when out riding his bike. He didn't spend weeks in hospital, in pain, frightened, confused. He didn't die in agony, crushed in a twisted car, waiting for the fire crew to arrive to cut him free. He didn't die fighting for breath, after years paralysed in a wheel chair. He died riding the bike he loved in the hills he loved. I always stop and give thanks for him.

To die in the arms of someone who loves you, when doing something you both really want to do, does not seem to me at all a bad ending. We all die. It's how we die that makes the difference. For what it's worth I haven't done breathplay much, and I certainly haven't done it nearly to the point of choking someone. But I don't see it as an especially dangerous practice, if you stay on top of what you're doing.

In our culture we have a ridiculous taboo about death. Death is something that happens to us all; we're all going to die. It really isn't a big deal.

 

[Homburg]

Double post

 

[Homburg]

To die in the arms of someone who loves you, when doing something you both really want to do, does not seem to me at all a bad ending. We all die. It's how we die that makes the difference.

Interesting sentiment... Provided both parties involved *choose* that possibility.

For what it's worth I haven't done breathplay much, and I certainly haven't done it nearly to the point of choking someone. But I don't see it as an especially dangerous practice, if you stay on top of what you're doing.

Then you are ignorant of the dangers involved, or your definition of "dangerous" is stupendously flawed.

In our culture we have a ridiculous taboo about death. Death is something that happens to us all; we're all going to die. It really isn't a big deal.

Tell that to the nice police officers that will show up after a death by choking is reported.

 

[SimonBrooke]

Then you are ignorant of the dangers involved, or your definition of "dangerous" is stupendously flawed.

Or you're exaggerating the risk, one or the other. Yes, people can die. But it isn't very likely and, like I say, I'm not at all persuaded that it is such a big deal - they're going to die anyway, and if they don't die during sex they're almost certain to die less pleasantly. Furthermore death by asphyxiation is not normally sudden. If you're not paying enough attention to notice that your partner is in a bad way you probably ought not to play any of these games.

Tell that to the nice police officers that will show up after a death by choking is reported.

Well, if the worst you're worried about is what might happen to you as the survivor afterwards then I suggest you are the one who isn't taking it seriously enough.

 

[graceanne]

http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h284/graceanne1978/iStock_canofworms.jpg

 

[callinectes]

PYL = physican means no choking for me. He isn't going there, no way, no how. Not that I am complaining much. We do breathplay in the form of his covering my mouth and nose with his hands, something we both find very arousing. He has also been known to pinch my nose while my mouth and throat were filled, this too is mucho fun. In both examples my breathing is fully restricted but there is no risk of damage to the neck/throat.