To put it delicately

[WickedEve]

Yes, my second thread today. I'm feeling all thready for some reason.

Anyway, when you write about incest, sniffing dogs' butts, licking your own genitals, etc. are you blunt, or do you try to be as delicate and poetic as possible? How successful are you? Yes, I'm thinking about some of the filth I write, but how I keep it poetic and subdued enough that it's hard to tell (sometimes) how nasty it really is. I was looking at my submitted poems and I have poetry about golden showers, fisting, exhibitionism, etc. Of course I'd never write something like, "Please pee on me," or "Shove all three of your fists in my box."

So, just curious... what kind of nasty things have you written about and how delicately have you treated the subject matter?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I've got one on here about child abuse/incest that I worried about for weeks before I submitted

 

[WickedEve]

I've got one on here about child abuse/incest that I worried about for weeks before I submitted

Name of the poem?

 

[UnderYourSpell]

The bogeyman

 

[Angeline]

Depends. I tend to be more metaphoric in poems because it's really easy (to my thinking) to overdo graphic sex and mess up the poem. It's a little space, relatively speaking (the poem, that is), and I'd rather tease the reader with metaphor than overwhem them with hardcore. If you read some of my stuff though, especially the Amante poems, there's some pretty kinky stuff going on though it's shrouded in metaphors. Same with my poem Darkroom, which I don't think is here anymore. Maybe it is. But it's about a photographer working while his sub is trussed up and hanging in the corner. And he's walking over periodically and doing stuff to her. I think it works better in its quiet way.

My stories are different. I was going to post some to illustrate my point but er maybe not. Ask Fool lol. He read them. When you have the wide open spaces of prose I think it's much easier to be hardcore and metaphoric and have it be really good.

 

[The_Fool]

Depends. I tend to be more metaphoric in poems because it's really easy (to my thinking) to overdo graphic sex and mess up the poem. It's a little space, relatively speaking (the poem, that is), and I'd rather tease the reader with metaphor than overwhem them with hardcore. If you read some of my stuff though, especially the Amante poems, there's some pretty kinky stuff going on though it's shrouded in metaphors. Same with my poem Darkroom, which I don't think is here anymore. Maybe it is. But it's about a photographer working while his sub is trussed up and hanging in the corner. And he's walking over periodically and doing stuff to her. I think it works better in its quiet way.

My stories are different. I was going to post some to illustrate my point but er maybe not. Ask Fool lol. He read them. When you have the wide open spaces of prose I think it's much easier to be hardcore and metaphoric and have it be really good.

Ms. Priss has a commanding way and penetrating wit with her prose. I am almost certain that she has a pair of stiletto heel boots in the back of her closet. She has a gratifying way with words, both for the reader and I'm sure for herself. Not sure she would be interested in breaking toys, but men?

 

[WickedEve]

The bogeyman

I remember the poem.
You handled it very delicately. Now that I'm reading it again, I think I was wrong to not give it 100. It's sad and powerful in its own way.

 

[Angeline]

Ms. Priss has a commanding way and penetrating wit with her prose. I am almost certain that she has a pair of stiletto heel boots in the back of her closet. She has a gratifying way with words, both for the reader and I'm sure for herself. Not sure she would be interested in breaking toys, but men?

Actually I can play either side of that coin but I do have more fun (and imo get more creative) with the one I write about. And yeah I have some great fuck-me heels which have mostly stayed in the bedroom lol. Stiletto heels and the Maine winters are a bad combo. And I'm pretty klutzy. But those heels do look pretty damn good in the bedroom.

 

[Maria2394]

I have one that is a sub/Dom situation, and the sub gets off on pain, and he obliges her, in a cutting way. I tried to keep it subdued. I've written a few about domestic violence, they are difficult to get just right.

 

[WickedEve]

I have one that is a sub/Dom situation, and the sub gets off on pain, and he obliges her, in a cutting way. I tried to keep it subdued. I've written a few about domestic violence, they are difficult to get just right.

Names/links? I want to read the D/s one.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I remember the poem.
You handled it very delicately. Now that I'm reading it again, I think I was wrong to not give it 100. It's sad and powerful in its own way.

Makes me wonder if we should write stuff that tears us up but I suppose it's good to air it or so they tell me can't say it's ever done me much good.
On to slightly lighter things watch for my poem with the trigger of 'your secret passion' if ever gets finished!

 

[CharleyH]

Yes, my second thread today. I'm feeling all thready for some reason.

Anyway, when you write about incest, sniffing dogs' butts, licking your own genitals, etc. are you blunt, or do you try to be as delicate and poetic as possible? How successful are you? Yes, I'm thinking about some of the filth I write, but how I keep it poetic and subdued enough that it's hard to tell (sometimes) how nasty it really is. I was looking at my submitted poems and I have poetry about golden showers, fisting, exhibitionism, etc. Of course I'd never write something like, "Please pee on me," or "Shove all three of your fists in my box."

So, just curious... what kind of nasty things have you written about and how delicately have you treated the subject matter?

While I used to think of myself as a poet, I am not. I am a writer (just want to make that clear). My very first poem on here (not published, just discussed) was about fisting and about the total high I got from it. The poem was cliche' and many said so. The metaphors were cliche, but I felt the form was not. Beside your point. If the theme of a poem was about the bluntness of pissing, fisting or fucking then the words would be as blunt. Perhaps you are not a poet of brevity, but one who is more intense and deep in your experiences? Metaphor is, after all (IMO) the heart of poetry.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

To be honest when anyone mentions fisting I get the very strong urge to clench

 

[champagne1982]

I have my non-consent story, Taken in which I try very hard not to romanticize the whole intruder thing but still convey the dark eroticism that occurs during the intimacy, be it a harsh rape or something consensual.

Most of my poetic fucks are pretty veiled, not blunt per se, but still direct in their intent to arouse. Look Closely for instance, pulls no punches in letting the reader draw the obvious conclusion and To The Man Outside My Window only uses a couple of direct descriptions, the rest is pure inference. I like to describe a situation in erotic poetry instead of describing the act... The reader has an imagination, I'd prefer they use it.

 

[Maria2394]

Names/links? I want to read the D/s one.

sorry I didn't get back sooner with the link. I know you've read it before and when I resubmitted, I changed it a little.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=357138

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

I've got one on here about child abuse/incest that I worried about for weeks before I submitted

I submitted one years ago - it has been removed (by me) over the years and I really don't know how it got in under the radar then!

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I don't know why rape stories have in them that the women ends up having her 'body betray her' and she enjoys it because a long ago when I was a WRAF a naked man sat on me (yes it does sound foolish now!) but I was young and inexperienced and he terrified the hell out of me. I really thought he was going to rape me and any sexual thoughts flew straight out the window thwre's no way I would have responded. As it was he did it on purpose to frighten me and just got off and laughed at me I felt so betrayed. It was a power thing as I believe rape is, once he knew that I knew I didn't stand a cat in hells chance he left me alone, but I still remember the fear after all this time.

 

[champagne1982]

I don't know why rape stories have in them that the women ends up having her 'body betray her' and she enjoys it because a long ago when I was a WRAF a naked man sat on me (yes it does sound foolish now!) but I was young and inexperienced and he terrified the hell out of me. I really thought he was going to rape me and any sexual thoughts flew straight out the window thwre's no way I would have responded. As it was he did it on purpose to frighten me and just got off and laughed at me I felt so betrayed. It was a power thing as I believe rape is, once he knew that I knew I didn't stand a cat in hells chance he left me alone, but I still remember the fear after all this time.

I wasn't sure if I could write an erotic story about rape that could be arousing, not the idea, really but through the language. In the big picture of the novel that that excerpt is from, she winds up puking and showering and calling 911... I never finished the book though because I made the mistake of outlining the chapters and writing a plot line; once I knew how it ends... I lost interest

 

[GuiltyPleasure]

I submitted one years ago - it has been removed (by me) over the years and I really don't know how it got in under the radar then!

Let's see what you all think.....too much?

(I should add that it grew out of a news story I read about a "tell-all" autobiography by an incest victim.)

Daddy’s Girl

Those cloudless skies, the smiling eyes
and happy sighs

all photo lies.

Little girls are perfect pros
at hiding what she really knows
doing what her daddy tells her
even as he kneels and smells her
breathing in his man-scent on her
hoping that his touch will conquer
any fears that might remain
in his daughter’s little brain.

“You must not tell a single soul.”
Knowing that he has control
that her love will keep him safe
even as he rapes this waif.

Childish pain will still remain
broken trust and love profane
haunt her to this very day
memories from far away
a distant time that seems so real
that never taught her how to feel.

 

[Maria2394]

Way back when I was submitting stories here, I wrote a true story about rape and it was rejected by the Editors. I was instructed that I should change the title and description of the story and a few minor details in it. I agreed to the title and description changes, but the content, no. I got a range of FB from "sick" to outraged and then there were the emails I got from several men, who could relate because their SO's had experienced something similar.

After a while, I couldn't take the stuff from people who didn't understand the piece or did and thought it made me "hot" so I pulled it.

and Tess, I can see why you thought your poem might be pulled, I don't think it's too much, but it is very detailed if the reader pays attention. I thought it was well-written and very astute. You are a talented writer/poet and artist. I am glad you came back to the forum.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

I'm trying to be subjective here, not too much I don't think and you capture the haunting very well.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

As a matter of interest are you allowed to murder someone in poetry on here? .......because I just did

 

[annaswirls]

As a matter of interest are you allowed to murder someone in poetry on here? .......because I just did

hahah! yes, you can kill them, just don't fuck them first if they are not human or 18

 

[CharleyH]

To be honest when anyone mentions fisting I get the very strong urge to clench

lol - yeah, I hear ya, but perhaps this is the exact visceral response the poet hopes for?

I simply meant that sometimes the experience of sex warrants blunt, short, violent and impersonal words. Perhaps the issue is the difference between a vocabulary of porn and one of erotica.

 

[greenmountaineer]

Limericks from the Back of the Schoolbus

I just got my first rejection from the editors of the site. It was a humorous poem about male teenage psycho-sexual development. I strung 5 limmericks together to do a little "hero worship" of a peer whom the girls seem to go ga ga over while the rest of us made him into some kind of comic book super sex hero that we all aspired to be. Two of the limmericks referred to Tijuana Bible comics. (Google it if you haven't heard about such things that were the inspiration of adult comics today. Olive Oyl, if I do say so myself, was quit the babe, and Popeye, well, his biceps weren't the only thing that was big).

I laughed most of the while I was constructing it. Erotica can be many things, and it certainly can and should be funny at least once in a while.

Because it pertained to sex among high school adolescents, it wasn't approved for publication. It made me feel like I was contributing to the delinquency of some cyberspace minor. I've had "writer's block" since. Whaddya gonna do?