Cat Humor

[Trinique_Fire]

My cat Blaze has a habit of following me wherever I go, especially at night. Insecurity, I think. He's been through a lot in the past few months. Anyway, the washer is in the bathroom. I had my nightclothes in hand...I had plans to go to the bathroom, change my clothes, brush my teeth, etc. I figured Blaze would lay or stand by my feet as usual.

Last night, the washer happened to be going and it was on the cycle where all the water gets expelled, fills again, and goes wildly fast. Those of us with washers know that the damn thing shakes and practically looks like it's going to take off like a rocket. I thought nothing of it, but Blaze took one look at the machine and started yowling. His eyes were about to bug out of his head, as I laughingly remembered that he's never been around a washer before. He plastered himself against the side of the bathtub (which faces the washer) and continued yowling at the machine. I tried calling him over closer to where I was, but he was too petrified. Next thing I know, he's scrambling over the edge of the tub (or trying to), turning back around to stare at the damn washer, jumping OUT of the tub and jamming his face and paws underneath the crack in the bottom of the bathroom door, periodically turning his head to meow at me as if to say "Come on mom! Let's get the hell out of here!!"

Ohhhhh shit too funny.....

 

[ms.read]

lol too funny. My cat sleeps in the bathroom sink and when she was a kitten swam in the toilet bowl. (only when it was clean.) now she swims in the pool with us.

 

[Trinique_Fire]

lol too funny. My cat sleeps in the bathroom sink and when she was a kitten swam in the toilet bowl. (only when it was clean.) now she swims in the pool with us.

A cat who loves water AND can swim?? Now that's too adorable!!

 

[voluptuary_manque]

A cat who loves water AND can swim?? Now that's too adorable!!

"Mornin' Trinique. Life starting to look up for you again?

 

[Guest]

The same kitty we have who freaked out after eating the June bug likes to hang out in the bathroom while people bathe.

He tries to lick ankles when you get out. Odd.

He is daughter's cat, follows her around like a lovesick boy.

 

[The_Fool]

The same kitty we have who freaked out after eating the June bug likes to hang out in the bathroom while people bathe.

He tries to lick ankles when you get out. Odd.

He is daughter's cat, follows her around like a lovesick boy.

There ya go. Now change your daughter to a female of more mature years and the cat to a male human that has been magicked and give it a voyeur's delight. Now the question to the story is, does the female break the spell, is the female the magicker who enjoys taunting the male tom that can see and not do anything about it or is the male confined to the cat to be continuously tortured while female innocently flaunts her charm without thought. Or perhaps the spell is broken and the innocence turns to humiliation and then you have all the angst associated with man getting bitch-slapped for being a voyeur even as a cat.

Okay, enough of that. back to reality.

 

[Guest]

There ya go. Now change your daughter to a female of more mature years and the cat to a male human that has been magicked and give it a voyeur's delight. Now the question to the story is, does the female break the spell, is the female the magicker who enjoys taunting the male tom that can see and not do anything about it or is the male confined to the cat to be continuously tortured while female innocently flaunts her charm without thought. Or perhaps the spell is broken and the innocence turns to humiliation and then you have all the angst associated with man getting bitch-slapped for being a voyeur even as a cat.

Okay, enough of that. back to reality.

You really do spend too much time thinking about pussy.







Edited to add - lovely idea! If I ever get my ample rear in gear perhaps I'll flesh it out.

So to speak.

Ahem.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

You really do spend too much time thinking about pussy.







Edited to add - lovely idea! If I ever get my ample rear in gear perhaps I'll flesh it out.

So to speak.

Ahem.

Too much time thinking about pussy? Is that even possible???

 

[TheeGoatPig]

Too much time thinking about pussy? Is that even possible???

To quote Chester in Seems Like Old Times, "Not in my neighborhood."

 

[Guest]

Too much time thinking about pussy? Is that even possible???

To quote Chester in Seems Like Old Times, "Not in my neighborhood."

Of course, gentlemen.

What was I thinking?

 

[voluptuary_manque]

Of course, gentlemen.

What was I thinking?

http://i264.photobucket.com/albums/ii177/1volupturary_manque/love.gif

 

[JagFarlane]

-chuckles- Yea...Pumpkin, the big tomcat, has recently discovered that he LOVES my fishtank. To the point that he'll spend hours watching it, before rearing up on hind legs, then sniffing at the tank and lightly pawing at the side of the tank. Then he'll crouch back down and wait for one of the fish to come to the side of the tank before springing up again to watch the fish.

 

[voluptuary_manque]

-chuckles- Yea...Pumpkin, the big tomcat, has recently discovered that he LOVES my fishtank. To the point that he'll spend hours watching it, before rearing up on hind legs, then sniffing at the tank and lightly pawing at the side of the tank. Then he'll crouch back down and wait for one of the fish to come to the side of the tank before springing up again to watch the fish.

Y'know, except for the pouncing, that's my reaction to a fishtank, as well . . .

 

[Guest]

-chuckles- Yea...Pumpkin, the big tomcat, has recently discovered that he LOVES my fishtank. To the point that he'll spend hours watching it, before rearing up on hind legs, then sniffing at the tank and lightly pawing at the side of the tank. Then he'll crouch back down and wait for one of the fish to come to the side of the tank before springing up again to watch the fish.

Am loving the name Pumpkin for a tomcat.

(does he mind it at all?)

 

[JagFarlane]

Am loving the name Pumpkin for a tomcat.

(does he mind it at all?)

LOL its the name he responds to

 

[Guest]

LOL its the name he responds to

It's very sweet.

 

[TheeGoatPig]

We had a black, brown and white cat named Pumpkin. Best cat ever.

Then a couple of years later we got Max, the big orange cat. Second best cat ever.

I really miss those guys...

 

[christabelll]

My cat Blaze has a habit of following me wherever I go, especially at night. Insecurity, I think. He's been through a lot in the past few months. Anyway, the washer is in the bathroom. I had my nightclothes in hand...I had plans to go to the bathroom, change my clothes, brush my teeth, etc. I figured Blaze would lay or stand by my feet as usual.

Last night, the washer happened to be going and it was on the cycle where all the water gets expelled, fills again, and goes wildly fast. Those of us with washers know that the damn thing shakes and practically looks like it's going to take off like a rocket. I thought nothing of it, but Blaze took one look at the machine and started yowling. His eyes were about to bug out of his head, as I laughingly remembered that he's never been around a washer before. He plastered himself against the side of the bathtub (which faces the washer) and continued yowling at the machine. I tried calling him over closer to where I was, but he was too petrified. Next thing I know, he's scrambling over the edge of the tub (or trying to), turning back around to stare at the damn washer, jumping OUT of the tub and jamming his face and paws underneath the crack in the bottom of the bathroom door, periodically turning his head to meow at me as if to say "Come on mom! Let's get the hell out of here!!"

Ohhhhh shit too funny.....

There you are... I've been looking all over creation for you! Please please send me your number again!

And my cats all have their moments of insanity.... I will be taking my big boy OMAGH to the boat and teaching him to be the boat cat (28 foot sea ray sundancer with a 496 mercruiser single prop in it)...

His favorite thing is to sit on the tub when in bath and dab paws and tail to clean them thoroughly...When in shower he sits at the other end to get "rained"on.

Hehehe cattails - cat tales - meoowr

 

[SlickTony]

Zoey, the cat featured in my avatar (I need to come up with another picture) was fascinated by the kitchen sink and the dishwasher.

The first time we found the splash guard for the garbage disposal missing, we didn't know what was going on. I thought I might have accidentally thrown it out, and looked in the trash; it wasn't there. Then I thought it might have gotten thrust down into the disposal itself. I looked in there. Nothing.

Then we found it under my son's bed, and still didn't catch on. We put it back where it went, and a while later it went missing again. We ended up getting another one that didn't fit in the drain nearly so well, but then the original one turned up, somewhere else in the house.

Then we actually caught Zoey hooking the splash guard out of the drain with a paw. And when we ran the dishwasher, she used to like to sit on the kitchen counter and look at the effluent from the dishwasher flowing through the drain.

She was a cool cat. She wasn't the most affectionate of cats, but she was so curious and playful, and had such a pleasant disposition, you really didn't notice.