Blowjobs: A scarce commodity?

[DeservingBitch]

A community of dirty kinky pervs is probably not the most representative demographic for my question, but are blowjobs such a rare occurence?

From reading escort review boards and talking with clients, I get the impression that in the non-kinky world, there aren't a lot of girls who give head for free. WTF?

In my days of fucking men without pay, it never occured to me to NOT give them head. And I would send them packing if giving me head was not an option.

What's your take on this? From conversation with non-kinky friends and colleagues, or just from your own experience, are blowjobs such a scarce commodity???

 

[madetotakeit]

I agree. I think it will be hard to judge based on replies members of this board. All I can say that guys I have been involved with have never had grounds for that complaint. Well, one did for a time, but that was due to denial as punishment for something he did.

 

[coy_one]

I know many of my vanilla girlfriends that are not into it AT ALL. They find it disgusting. When I've mentioned that I enjoy doing it, they look at me like I had a 2nd head. LOL

 

[WriterDom]

From my experience with vanilla women, I'd say roughly half enjoy it. Looking at submissive women it's a lot higher. 90% or so.

My slut loves it and it isn't uncommon for her to suck me to orgasm 10 times on a weekend. Only a few have been able to get me off multible times though.

 

[BiBunny]

Due to the kind of response I get from mine, I'd say yes. I can't imagine why, though. I truly do love to do it, and I'm at a loss about why others don't.

 

[Shankara20]

or just from your own experience, are blowjobs such a scarce commodity???

In my 40+ years of sexual activity I have experienced them a rare event indeed in each and every male/female relationship I have had including the BDSM partners

In my male/male play partners in is another story all together

I have found my female partners reluctant and not very skilled at bj's. Once again, male partners have been enthusiastic and talented. I do believe, INHO, that males give better head then females.

*sigh*

 

[goodgirlfl]

Hum well I've never thought about not giving a guy head for me its just a normal part of the sexual experience. And I rather enjoy doing it and so far havent had any complaints about my service.

 

[jockdom]

This is a sweeping generalisation but in my expierience catholic girls are more likley to suck you off than let you into their pants before marriage.

 

[DeservingBitch]

I know many of my vanilla girlfriends that are not into it AT ALL. They find it disgusting. When I've mentioned that I enjoy doing it, they look at me like I had a 2nd head. LOL

I wonder if it's a cultural thing too.

Most of the friends I talk about sex with these days are either queer/kinky, and blowjobs seem to be part of a normal sex life. Most of my vanilla, het friends are girl friends from home in Québec. And from what I can tell, they also consider blowjobs as a staple of any healthy sexual diet, and most seem to enjoy giving head and not find it 'dirty'.

So, could it be that it's a cultural thing? Is the rumor true about french chicks: are we more 'dirty' than our anglo sisters?

 

[DeservingBitch]

I have found my female partners reluctant and not very skilled at bj's. Once again, male partners have been enthusiastic and talented. I do believe, INHO, that males give better head then females.

*sigh*

Oh yes. That's another thing that has me wonder.

Every single client I see can't stop talking about my 'skills' about sucking cock. I know I give good head, but I thought that what I was doing was fairly standards. So it leaves me wondering what it is that other women do (or don't do) to make my blowjobs stand out that much.

I mean, it's not that difficult to figure out how to give head, is it? Watch some porn, use your hands as well as your mouth/tongue, be attentive to your parter's reaction, give him dirty sexy eyes when sucking his cock, vary the sensations, and if you can, learn to DT. How hard can this be???

 

[DeservingBitch]

I have found my female partners reluctant and not very skilled at bj's. Once again, male partners have been enthusiastic and talented. I do believe, INHO, that males give better head then females.

*sigh*

Question: in your experience, are men better at it irrespective of sexual orientation? As in, bisexual, 'straight', and gay alike?

In my experience, bi girls aren't better at eating pussy than your average man. Gay girls however tend to know what they're doing.

 

[EmpressFi]

Oh yes. That's another thing that has me wonder.

Every single client I see can't stop talking about my 'skills' about sucking cock. I know I give good head, but I thought that what I was doing was fairly standards. So it leaves me wondering what it is that other women do (or don't do) to make my blowjobs stand out that much.

I mean, it's not that difficult to figure out how to give head, is it? Watch some porn, use your hands as well as your mouth/tongue, be attentive to your parter's reaction, give him dirty sexy eyes when sucking his cock, vary the sensations, and if you can, learn to DT. How hard can this be???

yeah.. see.. I dont buy that anymore.. every single guy I've ever given head to has told me that I've been the best they've ever had and a few say that I'm the only one who's ever made them come that way...

I'm good.. but I dont think I'm THAT good

 

[Tuomas]

Living in a third-world, catholic-dominated country where even contraception was illegal for a couple of weeks this year, you might expect blowjobs to be completely off the menu. But not. Considering all my friends here are vanilla, a significant portion of them engage routinely in oral. In fact, there is only one girl that I know who actually refuses to give head.

So, if it's a cultural thing, I'm definitely in the right culture

Seriously, though, I think it has to do more with personal preference and experience. More experienced girls -and guys, while we are on the subject- seem more willing to give head.

But, I didn't to an objective survey.... I could, though

 

[LadyAria]

yeah.. see.. I dont buy that anymore.. every single guy I've ever given head to has told me that I've been the best they've ever had and a few say that I'm the only one who's ever made them come that way...

I'm good.. but I dont think I'm THAT good

I believe all guys say that to any girl that gives them head in order to get a repeat performance.

 

[EmpressFi]

I believe all guys say that to any girl that gives them head in order to get a repeat performance.

Oh I completely believe that.... hehe and it usually causes me much laughter when another girl gushes on and on about her new lover telling her that she's the best head he's ever had...

 

[LadyAria]

Oh I completely believe that.... hehe and it usually causes me much laughter when another girl gushes on and on about her new lover telling her that she's the best head he's ever had...

*nods*

I know how much I exaggerate for the male ego stroke. Generally, I function on the belief they are doing likewise.

 

[BiBunny]

Oh yes. That's another thing that has me wonder.

Every single client I see can't stop talking about my 'skills' about sucking cock. I know I give good head, but I thought that what I was doing was fairly standards. So it leaves me wondering what it is that other women do (or don't do) to make my blowjobs stand out that much.

I mean, it's not that difficult to figure out how to give head, is it? Watch some porn, use your hands as well as your mouth/tongue, be attentive to your parter's reaction, give him dirty sexy eyes when sucking his cock, vary the sensations, and if you can, learn to DT. How hard can this be???

I say that all the time. Yeah, I think I'm decent at it, but I don't think I'm worthy of the response I get. It's not that freakin' hard, anyway, like you said.

yeah.. see.. I dont buy that anymore.. every single guy I've ever given head to has told me that I've been the best they've ever had and a few say that I'm the only one who's ever made them come that way...

I'm good.. but I dont think I'm THAT good

Yes, I hear this all the time, too.

I believe all guys say that to any girl that gives them head in order to get a repeat performance.

And I think this is the crux of the matter right here. The fawning is annoying, actually. Look, I know you're just talking shit to get me to blow you again. Shut up already.

I still think that blowjobs must be fairly rare commodities, though, or else they WOULDN'T fawn so much because they'd think they could get one anywhere.

I take back my previous statement about how I can't understand why girls won't do it. There was a time that I hated them, too. It's just been awhile, and I'd nearly forgotten. The kind of guy who's always whining for one, always wants you to stay down there until your jaw goes numb and drool is flying everywhere, always shoving your head down at inopportune times and then never gives anything in return will break anybody from wanting to do it.

If you know you can't cum from it (or that you take forever to do it), why do you expect me to constantly give you hour-long blowjobs and keep it in my mouth all the way from the very beginnings of erection until orgasm? I don't mind doing it sometimes, but feeling like I'm being pushed and manipulated into doing it is the fastest way to turn me off. Anybody else ever get these kinds of guys?

 

[Shankara20]

Oh yes. That's another thing that has me wonder.

Every single client I see can't stop talking about my 'skills' about sucking cock. I know I give good head, but I thought that what I was doing was fairly standards. So it leaves me wondering what it is that other women do (or don't do) to make my blowjobs stand out that much.

I mean, it's not that difficult to figure out how to give head, is it?....
How hard can this be???

I don't think it is a matter of learned ability - of skill - but enthusiasm - desire. In my experience my male lovers get their own turn-on giving bj's, sucking cock makes them excited in a way I have yet to experience with a female lover. The males that have sucked me off seem to enjoy the effort, the slobber mess, the sounds and resulting release from giving bj's. Not so much the females that have troubled themselves to take my cock, including professional sex-workers I have done business with.

Question: in your experience, are men better at it irrespective of sexual orientation? As in, bisexual, 'straight', and gay alike?

I do not thing I have ever been taken by a male the self-IDs as "straight". My bi and gay lovers have all been cock sluts

 

[DeservingBitch]

I believe all guys say that to any girl that gives them head in order to get a repeat performance.

The thing is, when I used to fuck guys outside of my job, I never really got that kind of comments. I could tell they enjoyed the blowjob, but I never got the "OMFG you're the bestest ever!" kind of comments.

Now, when I blow a guy, it's because he's paying me for it. So, there's no point really in flattering my ego to get a repeat perfomance. He can get as many repeat performances as his wallet allows for.

Like EmpressFi said, I know I'm good, but not THAT good. So, what gives?

 

[YourCaptor]

What's your take on this? From conversation with non-kinky friends and colleagues, or just from your own experience, are blowjobs such a scarce commodity???

In the vanilla word, definitely. It baffles the mind.

Sometimes I think its a lack of experience. I am under the impression that a lot of vanillas, even when they have sex, don't look at each others genitals. So taking that mysterious thing in their mouth just sounds disgusting.

Luckily, once you expose them to it they seem to get into it. I know a few ladys who use to be die hard, "penises are so gross" believers, now they crack jokes about sucking.

This is a sweeping generalisation but in my expierience catholic girls are more likley to suck you off than let you into their pants before marriage.

Very true

 

[WriterDom]

It's just not about the giver though. I thought I was pretty good but my oral didn't get her off until I learned how she liked it. You have to just barely lick her. Sometimes just letting her move against my tongue. I think I was the first guy to ever figure that out for her.

 

[Tuomas]

I know how much I exaggerate for the male ego stroke.

That's just mean

So, what gives?

In the interest of empathy, maybe it's because they honestly feel it is? I mean, after time, you forget sensations, and that one sensation is very present in their mind at the moment. Like... what was the very best orgasm you ever had? It's hard to judge, isn't it.

Another thing is that guys might think that the girl is just expecting it. Or that he says it to you even though he doesn't have to because he's in the habit of going it. ....

Luckily, once you expose them to it they seem to get into it. I know a few ladys who use to be die hard, "penises are so gross" believers, now they crack jokes about sucking.

Exactly.

 

[EmpressFi]

It's just not about the giver though. I thought I was pretty good but my oral didn't get her off until I learned how she liked it. You have to just barely lick her. Sometimes just letting her move against my tongue. I think I was the first guy to ever figure that out for her.

I'm very lucking in that both my loves , even my Dominant, asks me what I like and how I like oral sex, both watch me masturbate to learn how I like to be touched.

 

[catalina_francisco]

The thing is, when I used to fuck guys outside of my job, I never really got that kind of comments. I could tell they enjoyed the blowjob, but I never got the "OMFG you're the bestest ever!" kind of comments.

Now, when I blow a guy, it's because he's paying me for it. So, there's no point really in flattering my ego to get a repeat perfomance. He can get as many repeat performances as his wallet allows for.

Like EmpressFi said, I know I'm good, but not THAT good. So, what gives?

Do you use a condom with clients? Just a thought. As to why they gush, there could be a variety of reasons. One could be that no, they do not usually get it free and that is why they are paying for it and why they think it is so outstanding. One could be they think it makes you feel good to get such a compliment for doing that for them and getting paid as opposed to doing it because you share a relationship. Now, if they choose to come back again and again, and if you are unavailable decide to wait until you are available instead of hiring someone else, IME they probably do find something special in the way you do it or you.

As to do women as a general rule do it...some do, some don't. I had a friend who wouldn't go near it unless her husband wore a condom. Personally it has always been one of my favourite things unless they were excessively bad about hygiene and then most things became difficult to consider. In the days before AIDS, it was not uncommon for me to give a BJ before ever having sex with a guy, and sometimes as the main sexual activity in the relationship if it progressed that far. I wasn't overly bothered about using it as a bargaining tool to get the favour returned.

Catalina

 

[DeservingBitch]

I don't think it is a matter of learned ability - of skill - but enthusiasm - desire. In my experience my male lovers get their own turn-on giving bj's, sucking cock makes them excited in a way I have yet to experience with a female lover. The males that have sucked me off seem to enjoy the effort, the slobber mess, the sounds and resulting release from giving bj's. Not so much the females that have troubled themselves to take my cock, including professional sex-workers I have done business with.

Yep, enthusiasm is the key I think.

Which must be why I get the responses I do. I enjoy giving head much more than being fucked by a dude. I can get into being fucked or fucking him, but more often than not, it doesn't do much for me. And most are lousy at eating pussy.

Giving head though, I enjoy. It's my show, I control the action, I like getting the reaction I'm looking for, I like the teasing, I like the slobber mess and the sounds of it, etc. Basically, it gets me wet as well. Which is apparently another rare occurence. Guys just go crazy when they realize that I'm wet from just sucking their cock.

So, where is this coming from? Is YourCaptor unto something? Do you think that vanilla 'normal' folks are just not aquainted enough with each others' bits?