Jacking-Off Log

[Batch]

shivery in a good way, I hope!

oh yes...

I like those bracelets, too.

 

[bisexplicit]

Positive yes,

Guilt, no! Well not lately, deep sorrow oh, yes.

I don't like the guilt, but, it seems inevitable.

After every orgasm, I am ashamed by the filthy thing I have just done and the dirty thoughts I just had. It would be hot, if I didn't feel so genuinely bad about it.

But, during...*sighs* Thats a wonderful release and escape.

 

[JustSkye]

oh yes...

I like those bracelets, too.

I'm a silver girl. They were gifts to replace some I'd sold to help a loved one.
They never come off, unlike the rest of the stuff I wear.

 

[Batch]

I don't like the guilt, but, it seems inevitable.

After every orgasm, I am ashamed by the filthy thing I have just done and the dirty thoughts I just had. It would be hot, if I didn't feel so genuinely bad about it.

But, during...*sighs* Thats a wonderful release and escape.

Mastubation is in my mind, not a bad pursuit, some of my thoughts while doing... verge on not so nice, but I am resolved to accept myself, and I do.

 

[Batch]

I'm a silver girl. They were gifts to replace some I'd sold to help a loved one.
They never come off, unlike the rest of the stuff I wear.

I love silver, I have several chain bracelets, I used to wear all the time... but time and change of jobs have made wearing them inadvisable...

I love jewelry, though I do not wear it often.

Yours suits you.

 

[JustSkye]

I love silver, I have several chain bracelets, I used to wear all the time... but time and change of jobs have made wearing them inadvisable...

I love jewelry, though I do not wear it often.

Yours suits you.

Thank you, Batchi

 

[Marquis]

Out already?

You don't know my shame.

 

[Marquis]

I'm filled with hate and self-loathing, which I project as loathing of others, which they project back onto me, a perpetually intensifying cycle of interactive rage.

I have not even the masculine energy to act on my desires, if I knew what they were, which I don't.

I don't even know what I like anymore. I suspect I just like what I am told to like, or what I am given.

CHOO CHOO, out comes the semen, ISNT THAT A GOOD BOY!!

A BIG BOY!!!

 

[bridgeburner]

I'm just gonna have to walk beside the wagon.

I don't think it's all that much of a challenge to abstain when I haven't had the urge. Two days ago I forced myself to jack simply because I hadn't had even the slightest physical twinge in a few days.

It was quite a strange O. I'm usually deep in fantasy land but I just couldn't get involved in the film. I was spinning through scenarios like some kind of porn rolodex and nothing was sparking me even sufficient to get my nipples hard. Surprisingly, I still got the message from below so I gave up on the boobage and just moved on. It didn't really take all that long but it was strange because I was present and aware which usually kills my jack-buzz. I had a good long time to think "Am I coming? Is this it? It sorta feels like an O but this is lasting a really long time and is sort of poundy and uncomfortable but it's pretty good and oh, wait here comes the Ahck!"

Yeah, I made a sound like I'd swallowed a bug.


I think this has happened before ---- the change in the O, not the bug thing.*

I seem to recall a prior period of jacking when I really wasn't in the mood simply because I hadn't done it for a few days. Also the non-responsiveness of my breasts which is usually a deal-breaker for me. I mean, if I can't even get my own nipples hard I just quit and go to sleep. Last time this happened I started to experience these rolling sort of O's that feel sort of multiple. I mean, there's a final sharp spike at the end that is the definitive climax, but before that there are these really intense builds that make me think I've maybe come just enough to ruin the satisfying O. (Does that happen to anyone else? You're trying to build to a good climax but you fuck it up and O before you've got a good head of steam so what you get ends up not having been worth the bother?) Anyway, these aren't O-breakers, they just keep coming along until I hit the spike.

So, this recent O: I liked it, but it was almost painful and that was weird. I wasn't doing anything differently. I wasn't being rough or anything but I got this clenchy almost electrical pulse going before I tipped over. Seriously, it's like things were shaking and juddering around in there. Remember the School House Rock about digestion? Where they show the stomach with the rib ends kind of intruding and then it rumbles and shakes from hunger? So that was the inside of my pussay. Like some kind of freaking earthquake or something.

And the whole time I'm barely getting any images. Usually that's the point when I devolve into utter silliness or total porn cliche -- I'm visualizing come shots or some grody dude's O face while he grunts and shudders -- but no dice this time around. I'm just having some kind of weird out of mind experience totally distracted by my body.

In the interests of science I feel that I must try and reproduce this result. Who knows? It may be linked to hormones or the phase of the moon or something and it may pass never to be repeated.

Uh, so if I can manage it, I'm going to continue to jack.


*I actually have made the sound like I swallowed a bug before, but I don't think it's really integral to the rest of this recent phenomenon.

 

[MechaBlade]

Can you do me a favor and describe this in more detail?

Thanks.

Very well.

While walking down the street and seeing the evidence on the ground that dog had recently passed by that particular spot, I found myself thinking about a seeing-eye bitch and whether it would be better for her to stand up or walk on all fours. Classically, dog-girls are on all fours like dogs, but I thought maybe it might be more humiliating to have her stand up (while still naked and on a leash, of course) as if to emphasize that she is/was human but is currently in dog status.

I eventually decided that people wouldn't really understand what was going on unless the dog-girl was on all fours, which is humiliating enough, if not more so.

That's pretty much the extent of it.

I'm filled with hate and self-loathing, which I project as loathing of others, which they project back onto me, a perpetually intensifying cycle of interactive rage.

I have not even the masculine energy to act on my desires, if I knew what they were, which I don't.

I don't even know what I like anymore. I suspect I just like what I am told to like, or what I am given.

CHOO CHOO, out comes the semen, ISNT THAT A GOOD BOY!!

A BIG BOY!!!

I think you're a good guy, Marquis. And I respect you.

 

[bridgeburner]

I eventually decided that people wouldn't really understand what was going on unless the dog-girl was on all fours, which is humiliating enough, if not more so.

You don't want to inconvenience yourself by having to slow your pace to whatever her crawling speed is, though. What about if you put her knees on a little dolly or something? Then she'd be bent over all the time but she could move her hands fast enough to pull the little cart and not slow you down.

Hmmm......is it more humiliating for her to be constantly exposed like that or for her to keep covering and flashing her bits while she crawls? I'm leaning toward the covering/flashing, but there's still the problem of speed.

 

[Not Normal]

I'm a silver girl. They were gifts to replace some I'd sold to help a loved one.
They never come off, unlike the rest of the stuff I wear.

Thanks for putting the image of you wearing only bracelets in to my mind.

 

[MechaBlade]

You don't want to inconvenience yourself by having to slow your pace to whatever her crawling speed is, though. What about if you put her knees on a little dolly or something? Then she'd be bent over all the time but she could move her hands fast enough to pull the little cart and not slow you down.

Hmmm......is it more humiliating for her to be constantly exposed like that or for her to keep covering and flashing her bits while she crawls? I'm leaning toward the covering/flashing, but there's still the problem of speed.

When a blind man, or a man pretending to be blind is out with his dog-girl, the pace of a leisurely stroll is just fine. She can manage that.

Dog-girls may whimper or hang their head, but covering up is strictly forbidden.

That's another fantasy where the girl is covering nudity in public. I haven't worked it out yet completely, but I like the idea of a woman being held by her arm, dragged along down the street completely nude (no leash) while she tries to cover herself and onlookers stare. Pretty much the exact same scene from New Jack City, except with a naked female instead of a man.

Also good is a story I started but never finished where a woman was lost and nude in a city and found her way home walking through alleyways where she could.

 

[bridgeburner]

Also good is a story I started but never finished where a woman was lost and nude in a city and found her way home walking through alleyways where she could.

This is putting me in mind of the night my neighbor brought home a chick in a wife-beater and nothing else. She was ducking her head and pulling at the bottom edge of the shirt to cover her pubes. Also, seeing them let me know that I really HAD heard somebody getting fucked in the alley.


heh. fucked in the alley. snicker.

Okay, my brain is goo. Off to bed I go.

 

[MechaBlade]

This is putting me in mind of the night my neighbor brought home a chick in a wife-beater and nothing else. She was ducking her head and pulling at the bottom edge of the shirt to cover her pubes. Also, seeing them let me know that I really HAD heard somebody getting fucked in the alley.


heh. fucked in the alley. snicker.

Okay, my brain is goo. Off to bed I go.

God I want to jack off to the image of that girl wearing the wife beater.

 

[chrismacdonald_9]

jacked off twice already today. first time looking at lit pics, and second stopped the car on the long drive after a meeting and jacked in the car. might go for a third now

 

[sallybaby]

I haven't gotten rid of it yet today,but will sometime this morning...

 

[MechaBlade]

I'm out.

I had a hard day. Something had to give.

 

[bisexplicit]

I'm filled with hate and self-loathing, which I project as loathing of others, which they project back onto me, a perpetually intensifying cycle of interactive rage.

I have not even the masculine energy to act on my desires, if I knew what they were, which I don't.

I don't even know what I like anymore. I suspect I just like what I am told to like, or what I am given.

CHOO CHOO, out comes the semen, ISNT THAT A GOOD BOY!!

A BIG BOY!!!

To feel like some semen-making machine cannot be good.

It is difficult when you feel sexually lost; when you're masturbating or fantasizing to things that you know you don't actually like.

Maybe you need to slap-a-bitch, more?

Very well.

While walking down the street and seeing the evidence on the ground that dog had recently passed by that particular spot, I found myself thinking about a seeing-eye bitch and whether it would be better for her to stand up or walk on all fours. Classically, dog-girls are on all fours like dogs, but I thought maybe it might be more humiliating to have her stand up (while still naked and on a leash, of course) as if to emphasize that she is/was human but is currently in dog status.

I eventually decided that people wouldn't really understand what was going on unless the dog-girl was on all fours, which is humiliating enough, if not more so.

That's pretty much the extent of it.

I like it.

I think if you were going to have her stop and piss like a dog in public, on the side of the road, it would be better if she was on all fours.

 

[rosco rathbone]

day 4

I'm just gonna have to walk beside the wagon.

Classic. Seems like it ought to be a line in a gospel song.

Yeah, I made a sound like I'd swallowed a bug.............Remember the School House Rock about digestion? Where they show the stomach with the rib ends kind of intruding and then it rumbles and shakes from hunger? So that was the inside of my pussay. Like some kind of freaking earthquake or something.

Strong details.

This is putting me in mind of the night my neighbor brought home a chick in a wife-beater and nothing else. She was ducking her head and pulling at the bottom edge of the shirt to cover her pubes. Also, seeing them let me know that I really HAD heard somebody getting fucked in the alley.

That's a very horny image. It reminds me of the time I threw someone out in the hall of my building with no pants on for disrespecting house rules.

"......or a man pretending to be blind is out with his dog-girl....."

ahahaha classic.


About women abstainers: there's really not much point to it. Women gain sexual energy when they o, men lose it.

It's hard for women to practice sexual discipline on their own. They need a continent man as a partner so they can work on the delicate and balanced art of sexual interaction without letting their natural "sperm vampire" side take over. Men learn to retain the seed, women to assist their men in doing so. This creates a cycle of higher energies.

anyway, day four and everything is going pretty well.

I wasn't making it easy on myself last night, because I was reading Michel Houellebecq's Platform (again) as I was falling asleep. It's a very horny book, full of explicit oral ejaculations and lines like "...believe me, you won't find a white woman with a soft, submissive, supple, muscular pussy anymore. That's all gone now".

Then I woke up in the middle of the night with a brutal, phlegmatic boner and just knew that a jack would put me back to sleep like a baby. Using will, I resisted and tossed and turned until I dropped off again and had a dream of smashing a car thief in the face repeatedly.

All in all, I really haven't gotten to the heeby-jeeby part of this exercise yet, where my actual personality starts changing,

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

My sex drive

died. Yes, I know. I didn't think it was possible either, but I was wrong. Recently while in a Toppish frame of mind with my FWB, I left it slip that I no longer get off, that I am *gasp, shudders* FAKING it. *head shake* I know, I know.

It used to be that performing orally on a woman or man was enough to set me off at least 3 or 4 times. To have the taste of them, the feel of their flesh in my mouth, to know that they are opened to me because I am just such a great cock slut/cunt slut that while I am there they would promise me ANYTHING to get them off. Not anymore.

Now I find my brain wandering to mundane thoughts of "Hm, I wonder when next I can check MySpace??" or even worse "Gods, why won't s/he cum so I can fucking stop??" My ego has taken a beating, my brain is dead, my vagina feels as dry as dust.

Do you know that I haven't had a real o in about 2 months? How fucking sick is that shit?

 

[rosco rathbone]

Did you get the extended warranty on your vajayjay?

 

[Luna_Wolf72]

Did you get the extended warranty on your vajayjay?

No, I probably should see about changing my options or applying for a new one altogether..*head shake*

 

[rosco rathbone]

No, I probably should see about changing my options or applying for a new one altogether..*head shake*

It's all to do with ineffable flows in the orgone layer. A butterfly masturbates in Hong Kong and it's sexual feast in LA and famine in NYC.

*makes a vague gesture with hands in the air*

 

[SheRemembers]

I'm out.

I had a hard day. Something had to give.

*pats you on the head*