Bistro Bijou

[unpredictablebijou]

hmmm, I wonder if she was able to reduce several regressions into one reading?

Do you have a tree close by you can run out and hug? I'm very serious. Get grounded ASAP for the love of goddess .

And wash your hands in cold running water right now.

Then get your butt in here and bite me!

Happily, my shop is filled with bowls of stones for just such purposes. I've buried my hands in the tiger eye, the hematite, the rainbow obsidian, the black tourmaline AND the moss agate, just for good measure.

I kinda thought maybe a past life reduction was like, dieting in the 15th century.

ever read The Cellulite Prophecy? *heh heh*

oh god....

bite me then fuck me......

You seriously need to be here on Halloween this year. Cause I'm going for broke, even getting some f-to-m trans coaching for the facial hair, and I will look very much like this.

How's that grab ya?

bj

 

[Shankara20]

How's that grab ya?

bj

I can not stand up from behind my desk at the moment and please allow time for the wet spot on my slacks to dry before I leave work for home....

 

[Homburg]

One of my favourite fantasy novels is "The Anubis Gates" by Tim Powers. It revolves around a trip back in time to see Coleridge do a reading at a tavern. He's not there, but shows up as a character later in the book. Towards the end, he has a laudunum trip while escaping from a den of actual freaks and monsters, and the whole scene was just a trip of its' own. Good stuff.

And I would still like to read more work by Willim Ashbless!

 

[unpredictablebijou]

One is never too young to read about beets.

Good point. However, I don't think I'm ever going to be psychic enough to want a children's book downloaded directly to my brain.

Apparently she was teaching the children about the chakras through the eating of appropriately colored foods. But then the story turned into something about her uncle and his tattoos and the fact that she was born on the anniversary of his death. She had a snake head drawn on the back of her hand with magic marker.

Fess up, people. Someone in here hired her, right?

You're obviously not chanting la pa enough.

I'm getting on that right away.


Llllllllaaaaaaaaah. Paaaaaaaaaah. Lollllllaaaa paaaaloooozaaaaa....

bj

eta: shanka-ji: tee-hee. Found a button, did I? I'll be pushing it regularly, believe me.

 

[Eluard]

Fess up, people. Someone in here hired her, right?

Someone in here is her.


<---- Hey, North by Northwest. Good choice.

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Ahh, yes, the as the worm turns Absinthe induced poetry. I for one, find it impossible to focus, nevermind hold a stylus or type when I'm even slightly impaired. I can't imagine drinking enough to hallucinate and still get it down in a semblance of English. Perhaps that's where the "artistry" comes in? LOL, as the tree morphs into a snake with a trunk into a long blissed sigh of eeeeeeeeeeeeee? D see UYS, I managed to keep my reference to big ones metaphoric I hope )

And yes, we know you don't like licorice, even wormwood scented licorice that leaves a bitter blech laying around on your tongue... BTW, loverly legs. If that's Ron, he's looking ready to smoosh his face into your cleavage all too happily.

He he you're still badddddd!

lawl.

It's BATSHIT CRAZY DAY at the shop. Just had a lady in here who may be the craziest customer ever, and in this shop that's really saying something.

She had long, constant conversations with her voices: "What? Oh. Okay, I'll tell her. Don't rush me. She already drinks chamomile tea. Who's Kirsten?" and so on. She asked if I did "past life reductions" and then told me all about my past life as her cousin in the 15th century. She tried on one of the kimonos and wandered around the shop in it, talking to the cats... or whatever.

Then she bought four drams of oil: frankincense, (which she called "incense") myrrh, citronella and sage (for the record, it's going to smell AWFUL) and then left the shop, reappearing with a bottle of hot sauce, which she was drinking. She finished the sauce and then poured all four of the oils into the unrinsed bottle, assuring me that this was a money spell.

She asked if she could have one of the cats. I said no. She said her parents had been fourth cousins. (I don't doubt that). She told me about a children's book she'd written about beets, and offered to "send" it to my mind so I could see the pictures. I said I wasn't good at that form of psychic ability, so she just told me about the pictures instead.

She was here for about an hour. I was informed by her voices that I need to be chanting the words "la pa" more often. She assured me that she used to work in the fashion industry and that I would be a big success if I ever wanted to follow in her footsteps.

wow man. I'm still a little off center.

bj

Sheesh when I was reading this a spider appeared from nowhere and ran up the wall behind my monitor creepy or what?
I've always thought a vampire has a great life every night on the tiles and all those nubile maidens succumbing

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Someone in here is her.


<---- Hey, North by Northwest. Good choice.

heh heh. quit that.

Yeah, I'm a Hitchcock fan. And that particular scene is one of my favorites.

I've been struggling with a piece about that movie for MONTHS. I haven't yet managed to write anything that doesn't suck, but I keep trying...

Sheesh when I was reading this a spider appeared from nowhere and ran up the wall behind my monitor creepy or what?
I've always thought a vampire has a great life every night on the tiles and all those nubile maidens succumbing

Creepy indeed. It was probably one of the Children of the Night. <----- said in a very bad Lugosi accent.

*juvenile beavis-and-butthead moment: you said succumbing. huh-huh huh-huh*

bj

 

[Angeline]

He he you're still badddddd!



Sheesh when I was reading this a spider appeared from nowhere and ran up the wall behind my monitor creepy or what?
I've always thought a vampire has a great life every night on the tiles and all those nubile maidens succumbing

I've been meaning to tell you how cute you look in that av. Verrry nice leggies.

 

[Anschul]

Actually, I think it was my ex-wife.

Someone in here is her.


<---- Hey, North by Northwest. Good choice.

lawl.

It's BATSHIT CRAZY DAY at the shop. Just had a lady in here who may be the craziest customer ever, and in this shop that's really saying something.

She had long, constant conversations with her voices: "What? Oh. Okay, I'll tell her. Don't rush me. She already drinks chamomile tea. Who's Kirsten?" and so on. She asked if I did "past life reductions" and then told me all about my past life as her cousin in the 15th century. She tried on one of the kimonos and wandered around the shop in it, talking to the cats... or whatever.

Then she bought four drams of oil: frankincense, (which she called "incense") myrrh, citronella and sage (for the record, it's going to smell AWFUL) and then left the shop, reappearing with a bottle of hot sauce, which she was drinking. She finished the sauce and then poured all four of the oils into the unrinsed bottle, assuring me that this was a money spell.

She asked if she could have one of the cats. I said no. She said her parents had been fourth cousins. (I don't doubt that). She told me about a children's book she'd written about beets, and offered to "send" it to my mind so I could see the pictures. I said I wasn't good at that form of psychic ability, so she just told me about the pictures instead.

She was here for about an hour. I was informed by her voices that I need to be chanting the words "la pa" more often. She assured me that she used to work in the fashion industry and that I would be a big success if I ever wanted to follow in her footsteps.

wow man. I'm still a little off center.

bj

 

[UnderYourSpell]

Thankyou for the comments on the legs lol the story behind the pic is thus .. I use a certain chatroom online and they have meets every so often, I not sure how it came about but it got so I was expected to wear something a bit risqué at each one. One time I wore a black see through jacket with black bra underneath and attached were those flashing things so that when I turned them on my boobs flashed on and off! The one in the pic was taken last year and I wore as you can see a verrrrrrrrrrry short skirt nigh on the same length as the top. The difficulty came when I won a raffle prize and sort of forgot how short it was when I bent down to chose one of the prizes on the floor ... but at least I still get wolf whistles lol

 

[UnderYourSpell]

http://www.lskerton.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/flash/penis.html

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Witchling, PM me with a few more details about Ron's condition. With his consent, we'll raise some energy for him here at the shop (we have a whole altar set up for prayer requests and many customers come in and light candles and stuff) and also at our gathering on Saturday.

Haven't seen loststar in here for a couple of days. Where are ya, ya shiny object?

off to leap about.

bj

 

[Angeline]

Witchling, PM me with a few more details about Ron's condition. With his consent, we'll raise some energy for him here at the shop (we have a whole altar set up for prayer requests and many customers come in and light candles and stuff) and also at our gathering on Saturday.

Haven't seen loststar in here for a couple of days. Where are ya, ya shiny object?

off to leap about.

bj

Is that you in the avatar? Was it before or after you had the five-shot expresso?

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Is that you in the avatar? Was it before or after you had the five-shot expresso?

About halfway through the second one.

Yes, it's my sexy Beltane AV. Just for the holiday.

howaya? It's another nutty day at the shop but it's a good nutty this time.

I'm here, tho. Seems kinda quiet around here.

... too quiet ...

xoxoxo

 

[Angeline]

About halfway through the second one.

Yes, it's my sexy Beltane AV. Just for the holiday.

howaya? It's another nutty day at the shop but it's a good nutty this time.

I'm here, tho. Seems kinda quiet around here.

... too quiet ...

xoxoxo

Hi.

I'm fine. You look very lovely in that av but what are you doing with that wire? Or perhaps you'd rather not answer. Ahem.

Everyone is obsessing over their poem revisions, I guess. I love your poem btw. And I thought to myself "I bet she had cun on the next to last line and changed it back and forth a few times." After doing mine I thought I've learned a lot about line breaks and spacing in the past six years. I knew I had, but to see the two versions of that poem, they're so different. I feel like Eve--I wasn't really a poet when I came here. Well maybe I'm still not, but I've learned a few tricks.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Hi.

I'm fine. You look very lovely in that av but what are you doing with that wire? Or perhaps you'd rather not answer. Ahem.

I'm as bad with wire as I am with a roll of tape. Once I got ahold of a roll of copper refrigerator coil when no one was keeping an eye on me and they had to get the jaws of life.

lolz.
Actually, just tryin' to be all artsy and shit. It's an old cheesecake pic.

Everyone is obsessing over their poem revisions, I guess. I love your poem btw. And I thought to myself "I bet she had cun on the next to last line and changed it back and forth a few times." After doing mine I thought I've learned a lot about line breaks and spacing in the past six years. I knew I had, but to see the two versions of that poem, they're so different. I feel like Eve--I wasn't really a poet when I came here. Well maybe I'm still not, but I've learned a few tricks.

heh heh. Actually I was so deep in the linguistics when I was first working on that piece that it could easily have been Kun- or kern- or chu-... I really got lost in that one. Y'know the word "kyrie" comes from the same root, too... I love that. Coochie-church.

We just had a major three-minute hail storm. I ran out and grabbed some hail and stuck it in the freezer. Some of the pieces were over an inch across.

I love this building during storms. It was built back in the 50's and is solid rock, two feet thick. There's an actual steel I-beam in the ceiling, even. They were serious about this box staying standing regardless of the weather.

another storm coming in about an hour. Think I'm going to stay late at the shop tonight...

bj

 

[champagne1982]

Well, the wired aspect suits you well darlin'. You could send a witching out for my heart; give it a chance to remodel back to normal and for me to regain some energy. I'm off to check on my salmon fillet... yummm.

 

[Angeline]

I'm as bad with wire as I am with a roll of tape. Once I got ahold of a roll of copper refrigerator coil when no one was keeping an eye on me and they had to get the jaws of life.

lolz.
Actually, just tryin' to be all artsy and shit. It's an old cheesecake pic.




heh heh. Actually I was so deep in the linguistics when I was first working on that piece that it could easily have been Kun- or kern- or chu-... I really got lost in that one. Y'know the word "kyrie" comes from the same root, too... I love that. Coochie-church.

We just had a major three-minute hail storm. I ran out and grabbed some hail and stuck it in the freezer. Some of the pieces were over an inch across.

I love this building during storms. It was built back in the 50's and is solid rock, two feet thick. There's an actual steel I-beam in the ceiling, even. They were serious about this box staying standing regardless of the weather.

another storm coming in about an hour. Think I'm going to stay late at the shop tonight...

bj

It is cold here again. We had a few springy days but now we're back to very chilly nights. But no more snow. I think. I could be wrong. We've had snow here in May before. Towns about an hour north of us still have building high piles of snow. But there were maypole celebrations all over the state today and downtown (a euphemism for "crossroads" here, pretty much) people are walking around in shorts. God I love Mainers. We had a neighbor who told me he always starts wearing shorts on March 31. "It's spring deah."

Coochie-church is cool. I'm tellin ee he can get over his lapsed Catholic guilt and just come back to bed.

Ok. Back to essays and jazz. Yes, I listen and score those suckers. It's the only thing that makes me able to stand it at this point.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

Well, the wired aspect suits you well darlin'. You could send a witching out for my heart; give it a chance to remodel back to normal and for me to regain some energy. I'm off to check on my salmon fillet... yummm.

Your heart is definitely going on the list, dollbaby.

oooo salmon. damn, what am I going to do for dinner?

*pondering*

It is cold here again. We had a few springy days but now we're back to very chilly nights. But no more snow. I think. I could be wrong. We've had snow here in May before. Towns about an hour north of us still have building high piles of snow. But there were maypole celebrations all over the state today and downtown (a euphemism for "crossroads" here, pretty much) people are walking around in shorts. God I love Mainers. We had a neighbor who told me he always starts wearing shorts on March 31. "It's spring deah."

Coochie-church is cool. I'm tellin ee he can get over his lapsed Catholic guilt and just come back to bed.

When you move south your weather will be so much nicer... more like ours, or at least on a similar schedule.

Course, there are the hurricanes...

Linguistics is an excellent cure for recovering catholics. Once they understand that coochie and cathedral are basically the same thing, they're all about going to Mass.

Com-munion. I mean, look at it. come. Union. duh.

God made words that way on purpose to give us a clue.

bj

 

[Anschul]

I have lots to say about the goings on in here tonight, but I've got way too much to do for next hour or so, so, "ahl be baaahk."
BJ, I think I'm in love. By the way, thanks for keeping the wire away last week. I'm not into too much scratching.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

I have lots to say about the goings on in here tonight, but I've got way too much to do for next hour or so, so, "ahl be baaahk."
BJ, I think I'm in love. By the way, thanks for keeping the wire away last week. I'm not into too much scratching.

No worries. It's a plastic-coated 14 gauge aluminum. Doesn't scratch at all. And it isn't as cold against the skin as the uncoated wire.

I'm sort of a wire whore. I get all excited over materials and gauges and stuff. Part of the job.

I'll be around this evening, one way or another, at least for a while. And then probably back after dinner, cause this is the BEST place to be during thunderstorms. Real-time looping radar and thick stone walls.

If you have lots to say, yay! I'm listenin'.

bj

 

[Homburg]

I'm sort of a wire whore. I get all excited over materials and gauges and stuff. Part of the job.

bj

So I went into the local Bead Shoppe, and the sweet old lady recognised me. Asked me about the piece I'd made, whether or not the girl in New York liked it, and how my trip was. I was a sentence or three into telling her before I realised that I'm either extremely memorable, she has an excellent memory for an older bird, or, damn, I'm being looked at as a regular.

 

[unpredictablebijou]

So I went into the local Bead Shoppe, and the sweet old lady recognised me. Asked me about the piece I'd made, whether or not the girl in New York liked it, and how my trip was. I was a sentence or three into telling her before I realised that I'm either extremely memorable, she has an excellent memory for an older bird, or, damn, I'm being looked at as a regular.

Watch out. Some of us older birds are still pretty spry.

I suspect you're pretty memorable, too.

bj


***
***
ETA:

I stopped back by, late night, between storms. The shop is quiet and dark, and now, surrounded by the dim gleam of polished stone, I listen to Niyaz and Fatboy Slim and Moby while catching up on the various poetry threads. The cats are a sleeping orange and black yin-yang symbol on the top of the jewelry case. It's rather a perfect moment.

And the poetry matches. It's blowing my mind. There is some stunningly beautiful stuff going on in here, and I haven't gotten a chance to read some of the threads for days. I have such a hard time staying caught up, since some poems just hit me so hard it takes me an hour of walking around in little circles before I can go back for another one.

There is some wrenchingly beautiful, fucking amazing stuff going on in the "All of a Sudden" thread. And Rainy, love, it's so good to see you back, and while your voodoo poems are killin' me, the one that really took the top of my head was In the Country of Mind... Amazing.

What's more, there is already great juiciness in the May Edit challenge. Stunning stuff.

Damn me eyes, tonight I wish the Bistro were a real place. I'd print out chapbooks of all the threads, and the place would be full of y'all, sitting in little, mellow groups, legs thrown over the backs of easy chairs, reading, sipping drinks, munching on apples and cheese and teacakes, quiet and deep in all these good, good words.

so. who volunteers to be the Queen of the May?

 

[unpredictablebijou]

***********

On entering the Bistro today, you find two new quotes
scrawled in lipstick on the enormous mirror behind the bar:


"Genuine poetry can communicate
before it is understood." - T.S. Eliot



"You are as good as the best thing you have ever done." - Billy Wilder




*************​

 

[Homburg]

"You are as good as the best thing you have ever done." - Billy Wilder

By this standard, I'm pretty fucking good. I like the idea that I can do all sortsa evil stuff and balance it all out with one really good thing.