Story Duscussion: "Revenge is Sweet."

[Joseph King]

Hi all.

I would be grateful for comments on the story below. I suppose as the author I know what was happening from beginning to end. The people that replied seem surprised at the ending... It was not a snap decision to end it and there is a good reason.

http://www.literotica.com/stories/showstory.php?id=350893

Anybody care to enlighten the confused readers before I give the background?

Many thanks.

Joseph.

 

[jomar]

Revenge, eh? If you think your story would qualify for the contest let Anna know you want in and you might get to sport the yellow avatar.

Completely Unsanctioned Quarterly Writing Contest - "Crush Your Enemy Like a Grape"

 

[Anna_Malia75]

Revenge, eh? If you think your story would qualify for the contest let Anna know you want in and you might get to sport the yellow avatar.

Completely Unsanctioned Quarterly Writing Contest - "Crush Your Enemy Like a Grape"

Woo hoo! Hey, Joseph. Follow Jomar's link to the contest thread (we're just having fun - - my story should post this week), and if you want some more comments, start a thread in the Story Feedback Forum*. They do this stuff all the time there. welcome to the AH!!

* This thread moved to Story Feedback by moderator after Anna's post

 

[Anna_Malia75]

Now that's service! I'll take a look as soon as I can, Joseph!

 

[Anna_Malia75]

I understand from you first post that the ending may be somewhat unexpected. But when I click on the story, here's the ending I get:

"Kiss me." She said. Our lips met and our tongues entwined. My prick came alive ready to do business once again. S

Did you actually intend to end it there?? 'Cause there's also no place to vote or leave comments. So either my browser is whacked, or you need to PM (not e-mail) Laurel and ask her to fix this up.

ok, now it works! As Emily Littella so aptly put it, "never mind."

 

[dv8tmind]

Feedback

Also new to this....But, Read it, and enjoyed it. I actually liked the way it ended. I have ended several of mine in the same manner. Things carry on in the imagination.

Hope to read some more.......Thank you

 

[Joseph King]

Also new to this....But, Read it, and enjoyed it. I actually liked the way it ended. I have ended several of mine in the same manner. Things carry on in the imagination. Hope to read some more.......Thank you

Thank you...

 

[mellowgyrl]

Read, voted, left you a comment!

 

[Joseph King]

Thank you - It was a very deliberate intention to end suddenly with the main character having completed what he set out to do leaving the reader to think about how Louise feels and what the repercussions will be when the ex husband sees the movies of his wife and daughter.

If you are old enough to remember Tales of the Unexpected (ITV) I had that in mind as a sudden ending. Not sure if it works but you have to experiment right.