Medical/ Baby question... plus venting

[angelicminx]

Can someone show me true, documented evidence that the SMELL of cigarette smoke on someone's clothing can cause a child to develop medical problems? (I'm not talking about secondhand smoke, just the smell of a cigarette smoked, recently or otherwise.)

 

[Stella_Omega]

Can someone show me true, documented evidence that the SMELL of cigarette smoke on someone's clothing can cause a child to develop medical problems? (I'm not talking about secondhand smoke, just the smell of a cigarette smoked, recently or otherwise.)

There is no documented evidence of such.

 

[Guest]

No evidence.

And we were complete anal-retentive idiots about second-hand smoke when our kids were babies.

 

[Guest]

............

 

[MaeveoSliabh]

Smell? No.

Chemicals from the smoke stuck on clothing possibly causing a reaction of some type? Rare, but possible.

 

[angelicminx]

This question is raised because I have a new nephew, 3 weeks old, that I have not yet seen.

My brother told me when they'd first found out his girlfriend was pregnant that I would not be allowed to hold the baby unless I quit smoking, because their doctor said that the smell of cigarette smoke could cause the baby to develop asthma, or other medical problems. I told him then that I just wouldn't hold the baby in that case.

My brother called on a Friday evening to tell me that the following Tuesday morning his girlfriend was scheduled for a c-section. He then proceeded to tell me that my husband was not welcome at the hospital (long story pertaining to my husband and her brother in law), and that I was not welcome either, unless I didn't smoke prior to coming. Again I told him I was not going to quit smoking for them, I just wouldn't see my nephew.

Through the course of that Friday, he called every member of the family, inviting all of us to the hospital, with stipulations. My parents could come, if mom got a doctor's note about the cough she'd had for two weeks. (Not a contagious illness, just a cough.) Our other brother and his wife could come, if they didn't bring the children (they have 5, two of their own and 3 family related foster kids). My aunt and cousins could come, if they didn't bring the children.

Needless to say, none of the family had planned on going to the hospital.

The morning the baby was born, he called to tell me that I HAD to come to the hospital to see the baby. I didn't go, because I wasn't going to not smoke before going and my husband wasn't welcome. My parents went, but mom didn't touch the baby and she wore a medical mask while standing across the room. No one else went, which upset my brother.

The following weekend, I called my brother to make arrangements to bring my 12 year old daughter over to the house to see the baby. He told me their doctor said the baby couldn't be around other children for 2 months (they have an 8 year old as well). I proceeded to tell him that my daughter had reached the age where she was allowed in ICUs, provided she was not ill. He still insisted on no children. I said fine, call and let me know when it was determined to be 'safe'.

I've heard through the family grapevine that my brother and his girlfriend are upset that no one has been to see the baby.

At 11am on Sunday (yesterday), my mother told me my brother has since learned from their doctor that what I said was correct, my daughter is not considered to be a child for this purpose, and I could bring her at 1pm. Yeah fucking right!


You know what? I admit, I was a pain in the ass about my daughter when she was first born. I insisted that everyone smoke outside, both in my own home and when we came to visit, no smoking in the car she was in, etc. or we just didn't visit with them. I also never took her anywhere she would be exposed to a large amount of cigarette smoke in an enclosed space. No restraunts, parties, etc. I had reason to put these stipulations in place. She was 6 weeks early, 3lbs. 12 oz at birth, and spent her first 3 weeks in the NICU. Her first 24 hours of life were spent under an oxygen hood. Her lung capacity was limited, and I didn't want anything to cause further problems if I could help it.

My nephew HAS no medical problems. He's a full term baby, over 8 pounds at birth and healthy. (my daughter was 11 lbs. 12 oz at 1 year of age)

 

[sweetness6280]

It sounds like these are very nervous 1st time parents, who are listening to every little wives tale someone tells them. They will (hopefully) eventually loosen up, if not, that child may grow up to have a multitude of anxieties.

The only thing I have ever heard has already been mentioned. In children with asthma, smoke lingering on clothes CAN (but not definitely will) cause an attack. In a healthy child, there is no empirical evidence that it does any harm.

I hope it gets better....

 

[SensualCealy]

If your nephew was sickly I could understand all of this, but what Im reading into it is more that they are really nervous first time parents.

I would point out to dear brother next time he calls whining about no one coming to visit the little prince that he is the cause of it.

People don't like to have boundaries put on them and when they do of course they put up their defenses.

My suggestion is, let them come to you! Saves you from having to buy a baby gift until then. Make sure you tell them they have to come between 3-5 pm, when its good for you! lol

C

 

[Autumn2]

The first thing that came to my mind was the fact that it could be the new Mommie's family causing problems and anxieties. additionally all first time parents go through this stage of thinking every little thing could hurt their baby. My gentle maternal newborn nurse self says that maybe you should give them a break and not be so offended at their desire to protect their little one.

Here's the real deal, Daddy needs to relax! Since there seem to be quite a few smokers in the family he needs to moderate his message a LOT! The smoke residue on clothing advisory is more intended for the residents of the home and THE BABY'S primary caregivers, not passing guests who hold the baby for 10 minutes and don't smoke in the house. It's the people who smoke like chimneys inside their homes and bring home babies to sleep in cribs where everything has that faint odor of tobacco that is the issue.

Now not passing the baby among vast herds of relatives is a good idea even with a big healthy baby such as this, we all have any number of microbes on us all the time including the big baddy RSV. When you finally do visit wash your hands before you handle his highness baby and make sure others do too.

 

[carsonshepherd]

There is convincing evidence that children who aren't exposed to normal germs (antibacterial everything) don't develop normal immune systems and are less healthy and more prone to allergies than kids who are just allowed to be kids.

 

[EmeraldKitten]

My best friend worked at a day care center, where she was in the baby room. The baby room was from newborn to 18 months. She was told she couldn't smoke because the smoke would linger on her clothes and could possibly affect the babies.
Therefore, no one was allowed cigarette breaks, and it was strongly 'reccomended' they not smoke on their way to work or on their lunch break.
I don't know how true it is... glad I'm not in the business.

Your brother sounds like an anal-retentive ass about the situation though. You wouldn't light up and blow smoke in the babies face or anything, so I don't see what the issue is.
Nowadays, everything causes everything.
When I was a baby, my mom propped me up on a pillow, fed me my bottle with one hand and smoked with the other. Times are a'changin', lol.

I hope he doesn't wonder why the whole family is aggravated with him, lol.

Good luck to you and the situation.. hopefully he calms down soon.

 

[3113]

A friend of mine and his wife had a baby a year ago. The baby was born full term and healthy. At a year of age, he is active, happy, incredibly healthy.

BUT...he inherited a ton of allergies from his mother. And these are serious. In his case, they include cat hair. If one person with a cat comes to see him and holds him and a single cat hair gets on him, he can die. One cat person did get a cat hair on this kid; he had one of those reactions where he had such trouble breathing, they had to take him to the hospital. He would have died.

The kid's doctor has said that his immune system will improve and by age 3 he might not be in danger of dying from cat hairs. Till then, we take care before we visit them to clean our clothes of cat hair and we don't pick up or hold the kid even if our clothes are free (so far as we can tell) of cat hair. (And yes, I know what doctors say about a kid being around animals to help them get over allergies, but in the case of such extreme allergies, where the kid will die, that does the kid no good, does it?).

I don't know about the mom or dad here, but if the mom is the sort to have allergies, and might have passed these onto the kid, such extreme caution may not be so extreme. The baby being full term and full weight and heathy has nothing to do with it.

 

[Guest]

edited

 

[Selena_Kitt]

The c-section that brought the baby into the world was worse for him than any errant cough or lingering smell of smoke.

Christ.

New parents can be so ignorant sometimes.

 

[OhMissScarlett]

It seems hilarious to me that the doctor told them this kid can't be around children for two months. If they had another kid at home, would they have to put them in quarantine or something?

When my son was born, I was way paranoid too, but you need your family. You just pass out hand sanitizer and you deal with it.

 

[angelicminx]

It sounds like these are very nervous 1st time parents, who are listening to every little wives tale someone tells them. They will (hopefully) eventually loosen up, if not, that child may grow up to have a multitude of anxieties.

The only thing I have ever heard has already been mentioned. In children with asthma, smoke lingering on clothes CAN (but not definitely will) cause an attack. In a healthy child, there is no empirical evidence that it does any harm.

I hope it gets better....

My brother's first blood child, yes. The girlfriend's second child. She has an 8 year old as well, who does indeed have a ton of anxieties.

Yes, I know the lingering smell can trigger an attack in a child with asthma. My cousin's 4 year old has extreme asthma, and the smell has triggered an attack on days when he was already on the verge. I don't smoke in a vehicle he is in, and no one smokes inside the homes he visits. (meaning the smokers never smoke inside, even when he's not there.)

If your nephew was sickly I could understand all of this, but what Im reading into it is more that they are really nervous first time parents.

I would point out to dear brother next time he calls whining about no one coming to visit the little prince that he is the cause of it.

People don't like to have boundaries put on them and when they do of course they put up their defenses.

My suggestion is, let them come to you! Saves you from having to buy a baby gift until then. Make sure you tell them they have to come between 3-5 pm, when its good for you! lol

C

They aren't taking the baby anywhere until he's 2-3 months old, not even the grocery store from my understanding. I'll see the baby on their turf, on MY schedule, lol.

The first thing that came to my mind was the fact that it could be the new Mommie's family causing problems and anxieties. additionally all first time parents go through this stage of thinking every little thing could hurt their baby. My gentle maternal newborn nurse self says that maybe you should give them a break and not be so offended at their desire to protect their little one.

Here's the real deal, Daddy needs to relax! Since there seem to be quite a few smokers in the family he needs to moderate his message a LOT! The smoke residue on clothing advisory is more intended for the residents of the home and THE BABY'S primary caregivers, not passing guests who hold the baby for 10 minutes and don't smoke in the house. It's the people who smoke like chimneys inside their homes and bring home babies to sleep in cribs where everything has that faint odor of tobacco that is the issue.

Now not passing the baby among vast herds of relatives is a good idea even with a big healthy baby such as this, we all have any number of microbes on us all the time including the big baddy RSV. When you finally do visit wash your hands before you handle his highness baby and make sure others do too.

Yeah, they'd get a little more leeway for being paranoid first timers, if they didn't have an 8 year old and weren't paranoid about everything. They've been a pain in the ass about everything under the sun since they've been together.

Yes, this issue I can see, since I DO smoke in my home and I see the effects of that on everything I own. (The brownish tint on everything, lol.)

Agree with not passing him around. That's the way our family has always handled newborns, only allowing a certain number of non-caretaking hands per day, and ALWAYS washing our hands. We wash our hands not only for the riddence of germs and dirt, but for the elimination of nicotine on the hands. It's my understanding that nicotine passes through the skin easily, and I've never wanted to cause nicotine poisoning.

There is convincing evidence that children who aren't exposed to normal germs (antibacterial everything) don't develop normal immune systems and are less healthy and more prone to allergies than kids who are just allowed to be kids.

I've been convinced by it. The pediatrician who cared for my daughter in the neonatal care unit advised me to keep my daughter away from sick people, and limit the number of handlers for the first few weeks, but to otherwise visit or have visitors as I saw fit. She said to listen to my daughter, she knows when she needs a break. My daughter, who is nearing 13, has rarely been sick. A child I know, two days younger than my daughter, who was sheltered as an infant, is constantly sick with one thing or another.

My best friend worked at a day care center, where she was in the baby room. The baby room was from newborn to 18 months. She was told she couldn't smoke because the smoke would linger on her clothes and could possibly affect the babies.
Therefore, no one was allowed cigarette breaks, and it was strongly 'reccomended' they not smoke on their way to work or on their lunch break.
I don't know how true it is... glad I'm not in the business.

Your brother sounds like an anal-retentive ass about the situation though. You wouldn't light up and blow smoke in the babies face or anything, so I don't see what the issue is.
Nowadays, everything causes everything.
When I was a baby, my mom propped me up on a pillow, fed me my bottle with one hand and smoked with the other. Times are a'changin', lol.

I hope he doesn't wonder why the whole family is aggravated with him, lol.

Good luck to you and the situation.. hopefully he calms down soon.

Not a job I would keep, lol.

My brother's an anal-retentive ass about everything, and his girlfriend is 10 times worse.

Thanks, lol.

 

[angelicminx]

A friend of mine and his wife had a baby a year ago. The baby was born full term and healthy. At a year of age, he is active, happy, incredibly healthy.

BUT...he inherited a ton of allergies from his mother. And these are serious. In his case, they include cat hair. If one person with a cat comes to see him and holds him and a single cat hair gets on him, he can die. One cat person did get a cat hair on this kid; he had one of those reactions where he had such trouble breathing, they had to take him to the hospital. He would have died.

The kid's doctor has said that his immune system will improve and by age 3 he might not be in danger of dying from cat hairs. Till then, we take care before we visit them to clean our clothes of cat hair and we don't pick up or hold the kid even if our clothes are free (so far as we can tell) of cat hair. (And yes, I know what doctors say about a kid being around animals to help them get over allergies, but in the case of such extreme allergies, where the kid will die, that does the kid no good, does it?).

I don't know about the mom or dad here, but if the mom is the sort to have allergies, and might have passed these onto the kid, such extreme caution may not be so extreme. The baby being full term and full weight and heathy has nothing to do with it.

How in the world did they first discover this? How frightening. In a case like this, I certainly would not complain in the least, and would follow whatever rules they put in place. (and no, exposure to the allergen in cases of extreme allergy makes no sense whatsoever)

The fact that they both smoked up until the pregnancy was first discovered (my brother a while longer, and I don't know that he's actually quit at this point), lends evidence, to me, to the contrary of smoke allergies in the mother.

 

[angelicminx]

First, he is being a pain in the ass, and he should be given time to think this over. The baby won't suffer for lack of visitors for a while, so you have time

I am allergic to cigarretes. Just being in a room with someone who was on a cigarrete break can make me sick. I don't go to pubs, etc, nor do I linger in places where there is smoke.

The exposure to germs thing does not apply to newborns. They do need to be protected for a while. There is nothing more heartbreaking than a hospitalized newborn.

My son was born premature and almost no one saw him in his first three months of life. People could not come without their kids, and we understood that. Once he was over his birth weight and got the doctor's ok, we started taking him places, etc.

There were a few awkward situations, but we knew we were right, and we stood our ground.

Maharat

I'm sorry you're allergic to cigarettes. Does the lingering smell on clothing make you sick as well? Cigarette allergies in other people, among other things, is why I don't complain much about not being able to smoke inside most buildings (bars being the exception). I also don't ask to smoke inside people's homes, unless they light up themselves.

I have actually put out a cigarette while on my break. I was in the smoking section of a cafe, years ago, and the non-smoking section was but a few tables away. A woman sat down in the non-smoking section with a toddler and an infant, and I overheard her rudely say, "People shouldn't be allowed to fucking smoke, I have a baby here." I was 18 at the time, but I remember it like it was yesterday. I put my cigarette out and walked over to the woman. I said, "I put my cigarette out BECAUSE of the baby, not because of you. You COULD have sat on the other side of the cafe, away from the smoke that you clearly saw BEFORE you sat down. Instead you choose to be a rude bitch and impose your values on the public at large." Then I went outside to finish my cigarette before returning to work.

Yep, I've stood my ground where my child is concerned, which is why I'm not pushing the issue with my brother. Hence my statement to him to call me when it is deemed safe. The questions and complaints here have to do with wanting information, and a safe place to vent my frustration.

The c-section that brought the baby into the world was worse for him than any errant cough or lingering smell of smoke.

Christ.

New parents can be so ignorant sometimes.

It seems hilarious to me that the doctor told them this kid can't be around children for two months. If they had another kid at home, would they have to put them in quarantine or something?

When my son was born, I was way paranoid too, but you need your family. You just pass out hand sanitizer and you deal with it.

Yes, they have an 8 year old girl in the home, who does attend public school.

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Let me be blunt.



They are both dumbasses.


Word.