Cock Talk

[Endless_Night]

The one I got just keeps throwing up all over the place. Messy bastard

I was really unsure at first whether you mean the one known as the original Mr. Aussie had a stomach virus and or . . . the Other Thing.

Based on the reactions I've settle on the Other Thing.

I'm slow, but I get there in the end.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

I was really unsure at first whether you mean the one known as the original Mr. Aussie had a stomach virus and or . . . the Other Thing.

Based on the reactions I've settle on the Other Thing.

I'm slow, but I get there in the end.

I think I just feel completely in love with your brain

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Ahh, you got the weeping cock extra saucy

If it were blood, I'd compare it to a Tarantino film

 

[LeSabreur]

If it were blood, I'd compare it to a Tarantino film

You do know that we guys are kind of uncomfortable with having COCKS and BLOOD discussed in close proximity, right?

 

[aussiegeekygal]

You do know that we guys are kind of uncomfortable with having COCKS and BLOOD discussed in close proximity, right?

Wait until I tell you about vaginas

 

[MindYaBitness]

Wait until I tell you about vaginas

*stage whisper* ...if he doesn't know by now, maybe he's just slow. Better use pictures.

 

[hotwords229_A]

A long Winter’s nut . . .

Now that the holidays are behind us and it’s time to get back into the groove, many of us in the Northern areas must settle in for the eternal Winter. This can sometimes be a burden on the old sex drive, how do you deal with this?

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?
Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?
Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?
Does snow make you horny?
Have you ever gone Winter camping?
When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?
What is your most passionate story in the snow?
How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?
Do you like taking snowballs to the face?

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?
I am. I'm less inclined to go out and find mischief. I do live a good snuggle in front of the fire, but it's an availability of decent lovers thing that gets in the way of making that a reality.

Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?
Nope

Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?
Yes. Naked. Hot tub. Snow. It's perfect.

Does snow make you horny?
Not really. But being active in the snow makes me feel good, which in turn makes me horny.

Have you ever gone Winter camping?
Yes

When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?
I have never given a snowman a.penis. I prefer snow eunuchs

What is your most passionate story in the snow?
I broke my wrist last year while skiing. That resulted in a LOT of down time, which led to much sex. That count?

How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?
I'm down. It can be really fun to just get the essentials out of the way and get down to business. I'm a big fan of keeping my socks on during sex too

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?
Is that a euphemism?
In either case - no!

 

[MindYaBitness]

A long Winter’s nut . . .

Now that the holidays are behind us and it’s time to get back into the groove, many of us in the Northern areas must settle in for the eternal Winter. This can sometimes be a burden on the old sex drive, how do you deal with this?

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?
Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?
Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?
Does snow make you horny?
Have you ever gone Winter camping?
When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?
What is your most passionate story in the snow?
How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?
Do you like taking snowballs to the face?

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?
Nope, winter is Cuffing Season. If anything being close & cozy inside makes me want more

Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?
Nope, not all. In fact, I love being snuggled under blanket with the window cracked just a touch so the room is chilly! Besides, what kind of question is this? I know many of us are middle aged, but we're not brittle boned geriatrics... yet. If a thick blanket is a deterrent to getting your rocks off, I suggest you make an appointment with your physical therapist!

Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?
Nope, no snowy sex for me

Does snow make you horny?
Not particularly, but once every 5-7 years we get a snow-pocalypse and get snowed in for a week or two. I LOVE it.

Have you ever gone Winter camping?
Not since I was a little kid

When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?
On the rare occasion that we get enough snow to make one, I'm happy with a eunuch. However, when my son was little he proudly showed me the snowman he'd been building, and was so excited that he found radishes next to the carrots so he could give his snowman balls. He's never made a snowman without balls (and a carrot-cock) ever since.

What is your most passionate story in the snow?
Pretty innocent, but getting kissed by my crush in a beautiful park while it was snowing.

How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?

Think of all that clothed sex implies. I enjoy a good bit of "outer-course", rubbing together like two sticks trying to create fire, where do I sign up! Best clothes? Wrap dress preferred, but I'm not picky.

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?
I'm with @aussiegeekygal on this one!

 

[ScarletDaisy]

A long Winter’s nut . . .

Now that the holidays are behind us and it’s time to get back into the groove, many of us in the Northern areas must settle in for the eternal Winter. This can sometimes be a burden on the old sex drive, how do you deal with this?

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?

I think I'm more sexually active in the winter. I snuggle up for warmth and next thing you know, buttons are pushed and engines are activated.

Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?

Ummm, no. I can manage.

Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?

There is no part of me that wants to fuck in the snow. No romantic whim, nothing. I'm Southern. Snow is scary, not sexy.

Does snow make you horny?

No. But snow days are for baking, watching movies, and sex.

Have you ever gone Winter camping?

What have I done to deserve going to hell?

When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?

N/A. I'm sorry, I don't understand this question.

What is your most passionate story in the snow?

I miss snow days. WFH has ruined the stolen day, where you have nothing better than to spend hours in bed. When you suddenly have time for the fun you've been putting off... When the toy box comes out to play.

How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?

If you mean in the cold, oh no thank you. But in weather fit for humans, that's what skirts are for.

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?

He keeps them well-groomed, so I'm not sure how snowy they might be now.

 

[hotwords229_A]

If a thick blanket is a deterrent to getting your rocks off, I suggest you make an appointment with your physical therapist!

The problem with thick/heavy blankets is that you have to kind of hold them up and out of the way while jerking off, taking them off is too cold, but holding them up is a pain too. There should be some kind of jerk off frame guys can put over our midsection to hold the blankets up to give our boner the room necessary and keep our arms free.

#patentpending

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Like this! Enny safe

 

[Hyacinthus151]

The problem with thick/heavy blankets is that you have to kind of hold them up and out of the way while jerking off, taking them off is too cold, but holding them up is a pain too. There should be some kind of jerk off frame guys can put over our midsection to hold the blankets up to give our boner the room necessary and keep our arms free.

#patentpending

Where there is a will there is a way. Can’t say I have had this problem, bent knees under the covers provide an impromptu canopy. Now not making a huge mess is a different story. Maybe go lighter than the 20lb weighted blanket?

 

[MindYaBitness]

Like this! Enny safe

That's exactly what my mind went to!

 

[MindYaBitness]

The problem with thick/heavy blankets is that you have to kind of hold them up and out of the way while jerking off, taking them off is too cold, but holding them up is a pain too. There should be some kind of jerk off frame guys can put over our midsection to hold the blankets up to give our boner the room necessary and keep our arms free.

#patentpending

Where there is a will there is a way. Can’t say I have had this problem, bent knees under the covers provide an impromptu canopy. Now not making a huge mess is a different story. Maybe go lighter than the 20lb weighted blanket?

This sounds like it might be distinctly a guy problem. I've never had an issue doing my taxes under blankets, and as a non-squirter, messes aren't an issue. Lucky me!

 

[Hyacinthus151]

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?
Never slowed me down.
Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?
Nope, enough friction and body heat between the sheets, they get tossed when you got to cool down.
Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?
Winter ski trips, definitely the hot tub and sauna.

Does snow make you horny?
Not snow specificity, but I do find a snowed in cabin to be incredibly romantic and intimate.

Have you ever gone Winter camping?
Yes, -15deg sleeping bag/thermal pad and hot water in a Nalgene are clutch.
When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?
Depends on the crowd and the supplies at hand. Ski trip, sure give him a carrot and lumps of charcoal.
How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?
Erotic AF, especially since that usually means some sort of adventure, like our naughty little secret. As for clothing the ladies hit the nail on the head. As a guy, rock climbing pants are a solid choice, they are usually light fabric, have a good amount of stretch for access, and the zippers are not like chainsaws. I would also say dress slacks.

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?
Ummm no

 

[Hyacinthus151]

This sounds like it might be distinctly a guy problem. I've never had an issue doing my taxes under blankets, and as a non-squirter, messes aren't an issue. Lucky me!

Definitely deserve the win, we luck out on so much more when it comes to sexual health and maintenance.

 

[TomTeacher19]

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?

I can't say I notice a distinct difference

Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?

Not at all

Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?

Back in college I had a friend I was hooking up with and we ended up at the same Thanksgiving weekend church camp and went for a walk that ended up having to her kneeling in front of me in the Chapel in the Woods and it did start snowing while we were there during it. That was cool

Does snow make you horny?

Brittany snow?

Have you ever gone Winter camping?

Yes

When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?

I have made ones anatomically correct and gotten many laughs for that. Conservative Christian college that gets a lot of snow is a dangerous combination.

What is your most passionate story in the snow?

I just said it

How do you feel about clothed sex? What is the best clothing for clothed sex?

I'm not opposed to it but I definitely prefer and enjoy the least clothing possible.

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?

I enjoy a good snowball fight as much as anyone and sometimes you take one to the face in the midst of the good time.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Like this! Enny safe

This is exactly what I need, but, obviously, BIGGER!

Maybe go lighter than the 20lb weighted blanket?

I actually do have a weighted blanket that is part of the problem.

 

[AngelicaS1780]

Are you less sexually active in the Winter months?

No.

Do you find sex or masturbation more difficult under all those blankets and warm clothing?

The blankets aren't a problem. The warm clothing might be slightly more challenging to get past at the start, but most of it is coming off eventually. Socks staying on is acceptable in winter only.

Do you/have you and your partner taken a winter vacation, gone sex skiing, snow hot tubing, or just had a good old fashioned fuck in the snowy forest when nobody was around?

No winter activity related fucking yet.

Does snow make you horny?

Only when I don't have to go outside in it. Being snowed in is sexy.

Have you ever gone Winter camping?

Not since childhood.

When you make a snowman, do you make him anatomically correct? Flaccid or erect?

If I made snowmen, the anatomical correctness would depend on the potential audience and the materials at hand.

What is your most passionate story in the snow?

Nothing very passionate. Kissing late at night with the snow softly falling.

How do you feel about clothed sex?

Starting out, it can be very sexy to touch and rub over clothes. A mostly clothed quickie can also be hot. For me, less clothes is better. I want to see and touch my partner's naked body.

What is the best clothing for clothed sex?

Skirts and dresses. In my personal fantasy, a kilt on a guy.

Do you like taking snowballs to the face?

Neither the snowy kind nor the semen and saliva mix kind.

 

[Trekka]

*waves hello from the sunshine state*

this is why im willing to fry like bacon for half the year
whilst dodging hurricanes and skin cancer
lighting santeria candles with my mother
to protect our homes from being whisked away

--> i'm actually gonna go swimming in the pool in a bit!

all yall are welcome to join

seriously though, the annual seasonal decrease in the number of minutes of daylight hits here too, and it impacts me, and my mood, even here, at jimmy buffet level latitudes. i cannot fathom living somewhere that's significantly further north.

 

[hotwords229_A]

Socks staying on is acceptable in winter only.

Barely acceptable.

i'm actually gonna go swimming in the pool in a bit!

There is no jealous emoji, but there should be.
I shoveled my sidewalk for the millionth time this year (were only 5 days in).

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Barely acceptable.

Have you seen my sock collection??

 

[hotwords229_A]

Have you seen my sock collection??

Socks should only be in a bed if one is feeling ill. Otherwise, it is close to an actual crime.

 

[deft]

Have you seen my sock collection??

Whassat????!?!

Oh, sock collection… my mistake.