Comments from older readers

[Actingup]

Had this one in today, and wondered if other people might want to share comments that give insights into the older (but still young inside) readership?

A very good read. I wasn't expecting this storyline. Being single in mid-70s is not preferable nor easy, especially if there has been a significant personal loss. One can have a dream, but scenarios like this are the exception rather than the rule. It was nice to escape reality and live in the dream. I suppose that's why we're here; why I'm here. Well done! Finn
(On ‘Remembering The Storm’)

 

[EmilyMiller]

Had this one in today, and wondered if other people might want to share comments that give insights into the older (but still young inside) readership?

A very good read. I wasn't expecting this storyline. Being single in mid-70s is not preferable nor easy, especially if there has been a significant personal loss. One can have a dream, but scenarios like this are the exception rather than the rule. It was nice to escape reality and live in the dream. I suppose that's why we're here; why I'm here. Well done! Finn
(On ‘Remembering The Storm’)

I’ve had some lovely convos with older people here. I’m going to be guilty of making generalizations, I know, but many were gentler and kinder than average. Some of these convos are still ongoing. Sadly some of the people are no longer with us. But I’ve felt privileged to be able to talk to them while I could,

 

[Gamblnluck]

I think you are going to find that a great majority of the most active readers on Lit are older. People working full-time simply do not have the time to read a dozen or better stories daily.
It is one of the reasons for the supposed disconnect between readers' expectations and author's on LW. You authors fail to recognize your audience. Yeah us old guys are perverts. Just like we were forty plus years ago. Some of us are writing. We love kink but we are not gonna accept certain things in stories.
We were taught in English class how to write a paper. We were also forced to read a shitload of old classics in school, even though in our private time, we read fantasy, comic books and what our teachers called 'trash'.
Now a lot of that same material is mainstream and very lucrative. Funny how that works.
Flamboyant prose may be appreciated, but when you get to the nitty gritty, a good story is what us old guys like. I remember the early Spiderman (early Stan Lee stuff) It told a story and resonated with an audience willing to spend 12 cents of often a hard earned allowance for a comic (later 25cents).
But the story resonated with many. A picked on nerdy geek comes out on top. He accomplishes things others wish they could. Justice is served even at a price.
My point here is: don't underestimate us old farts. WE are a big part of your audience.

 

[Gamblnluck]

I'm going to add that along with many of my friends, we read a shit-pot of old science fiction. Heinlein, EE Smith and so many others. Crap that today is considered 'camp' was the stuff of our dreams. In the early 70's we had Penthouse forum. I was mainstream kink. There were many that you'd never see on the regular bookshelves for sale. Hardcore stuff might be on a top shelf in the used book store, but it was there. I'm talking now mid 70's.
Young people think they invented kink. My generation was told the same thing. The ONLY thing that has changed is the media.

 

[ElectricBlue]

A story set in 1970s college days struck a chord:

by oldsage_1 on 02/16/2024
Great series! You have me hooked! nice blend of story and hot sex. Bringing back some ancient memories from long ago. First sex, learning and thrills of first intimacy. Well done!
Looking forward to you revealing more about these young college folks.
Cheers

 

[Actingup]

I think you are going to find that a great majority of the most active readers on Lit are older. People working full-time simply do not have the time to read a dozen or better stories daily.
It is one of the reasons for the supposed disconnect between readers' expectations and author's on LW. You authors fail to recognize your audience. Yeah us old guys are perverts. Just like we were forty plus years ago. Some of us are writing. We love kink but we are not gonna accept certain things in stories.
We were taught in English class how to write a paper. We were also forced to read a shitload of old classics in school, even though in our private time, we read fantasy, comic books and what our teachers called 'trash'.
Now a lot of that same material is mainstream and very lucrative. Funny how that works.
Flamboyant prose may be appreciated, but when you get to the nitty gritty, a good story is what us old guys like. I remember the early Spiderman (early Stan Lee stuff) It told a story and resonated with an audience willing to spend 12 cents of often a hard earned allowance for a comic (later 25cents).
But the story resonated with many. A picked on nerdy geek comes out on top. He accomplishes things others wish they could. Justice is served even at a price.
My point here is: don't underestimate us old farts. WE are a big part of your audience.

Are you trying to corner the 'cranky old fart' market here? I don't disagree with any of the above, and the last thing I'd want to do is insult the older readership's tastes and intelligence. My experiences so far have been similar to @EmilyMiller, although nobody's died on me mid-conversation yet.

 

[Bramblethorn]

I don't have it at hand to quote, but I had a really sad one from an older woman who was gay but never acted on it - "too late for me so these stories are the closest I can get" kind of thing :-/

 

[sirhugs]

I don't have it at hand to quote, but I had a really sad one from an older woman who was gay but never acted on it - "too late for me so these stories are the closest I can get" kind of thing :-/

and just what was your hand busy doing?

 

[Comshaw]

I don't have it at hand to quote, but I had a really sad one from an older woman who was gay but never acted on it - "too late for me so these stories are the closest I can get" kind of thing :-/

Damn but I hate that! Not her, I hate being so damned saddened when people get to the end of their life, look back and have some huge gnawing regret. Not the small things, but like her, things that would have changed their life.

I know we all have regrets, things we didn't do we wanted to or should have, but her's is on another level. I'm a crusty old bastard. I admit it. Even though I am, things can get through that crust. This one feels like a stab to the heart.

Comshaw

 

[Actingup]

Damn but I hate that! Not her, I hate being so damned saddened when people get to the end of their life, look back and have some huge gnawing regret. Not the small things, but like her, things that would have changed their life.

I know we all have regrets, things we didn't do we wanted to or should have, but her's is on another level. I'm a crusty old bastard. I admit it. Even though I am, things can get through that crust. This one feels like a stab to the heart.

Comshaw

Yep. And, at the risk of sending this thread sideways, the people telling people like her who they have to be can fuck right off, and then fuck off again.

 

[Kelliezgirl]

Had this one in today, and wondered if other people might want to share comments that give insights into the older (but still young inside) readership?

A very good read. I wasn't expecting this storyline. Being single in mid-70s is not preferable nor easy, especially if there has been a significant personal loss. One can have a dream, but scenarios like this are the exception rather than the rule. It was nice to escape reality and live in the dream. I suppose that's why we're here; why I'm here. Well done! Finn
(On ‘Remembering The Storm’)

That's print it out and put it on the fridge level stuff.

 

[alohadave]

I'm going to add that along with many of my friends, we read a shit-pot of old science fiction. Heinlein, EE Smith and so many others. Crap that today is considered 'camp' was the stuff of our dreams. In the early 70's we had Penthouse forum. I was mainstream kink. There were many that you'd never see on the regular bookshelves for sale. Hardcore stuff might be on a top shelf in the used book store, but it was there. I'm talking now mid 70's.
Young people think they invented kink. My generation was told the same thing. The ONLY thing that has changed is the media.

I read all my dad's Penthouse Forum magazines from the late 70s-early 80s that he had. He had about 15-20 of them, and there was all kinds of stories in there.

They ignited my interest in erotica, and I've been reading porn stories ever since.

 

[nice90sguy]

Most Old People (65+) in western countries have lived through at least two major changes in sexual attitudes. They (we) are important assets for young writers who want to understand how things once were, are now, and might change in the future -- and what hasn't, and may never change.


Playboy and Penthouse were known for their very well-written sexy stories. And the models displayed in the magazines, while being objectified images of male desire, were also confident amazons. No infantilizating depilation, no fear in their eyes. The fashion for shaving pubic hair is something I still hope will pass soon, once people cotton onto the fact that it's disempowering women.

Germaine Greer was a role-model for feminism; a sexually confident heterosexual who "played the game" the way that up till then was considered the male prerogative.


Recently emerged the "micro-playlist" phenomenon, whereby people are encouraged (by vested interests) to curate their individual sexual preferences, and people are so afraid of "kink-shaming" that people have lost the right to criticise other's sexual attitudes. The backlash is visible (and understandable) in the Loving Wives readership, where people who crave a return to an "old fashioned" view of sexual relationships can get some respite from the chaos.

Literotica, since its inception has never allowed snuff and pedophila, but these "kinks" are alive and well, and (possibly) on the rise, with people emboldened by the fear of kink-shaming.

What hasn''t changed?

Men have always been "kinkier" than women (of course that's a broad generalization, but still significant). And, because of biology, more likely to screw around than women. It's dangerous to ignore these differences; it's led to a lot of confusion in young men and women, and that confusion may have contributed to an increase in sexual abuse.

It's always suprised me that incest, a pretty-much universal taboo, is allowed here, and I think it's the biggest selling point of this site -- it's a place where people can find an outlet for a shameful urge. And people's attitude to incest seems to be very resistant to cultural changes; unlike, say, attitudes to homosexuality, infidelity, and sadomasochism.

 

[NoTalentHack]

That's something I love about writing in Loving Wives, that the demographic there does tend to run older, and they're just so ready to tell you about the way something in your story parallels their lives. Here are a few of my favorites that have stuck with me, in some cases for years.

The first is from Shouldering the Burden, set in a memory care facility.

I'm 4 yrs into dementia. I feel good but my wife will tell me if I ask, "Am I the same?" The answer is "no," but still her man after 47 yrs. She gets mad if I look towards the future too far. She says we will adapt and love each other to the gates of Heaven together. I hold to that promise from her and God.

The second is from You Could Have Stayed, about a post-divorce couple eventually reconciling, told over the course of seven conversations.

Who is ever ready for marriage, and then who is ever ready for divorce? Feelings, love, hate, anger. Questions no one can answer and no one to ask. You're 80 years old and still trying to figure out where you went wrong 40 years ago. At first, you blame the other person and say, "I did no wrong," and then you say to yourself, "maybe I was too selfish" or "what did I do to fail in that relationship?" "No! It's all the ex's fault, she's the one that cheated, she's the one that destroyed the family so she could go out and find someone else. She's the one that destroyed your relationship with the kids." Yeah, that makes sense but sure doesn't solve anything.

This was not a good story, and I can't say I loved it, but it got 5 stars because it's true to life. Except for the reconciliation, in my case.

The third is from Hall Past, about... well, you can probably tell from the name.

As I've said many times before, scattered throughout my own writing, I was cheated on in my first marriage. It fucked me up, probably for the rest of my life. It was nine more years before I met my second wife, and seven more years beyond that when I pulled it together enough to marry her. So... do I have Issues? Yes, Truckloads. Writing at Literotica has been both therapy and crutch, through several different stages of my process.

This story has been a watershed for me. Thank you.

'Toxic Forgiveness' is a hot-button issue for me; so much so that I generated 100,000 words out of the raw anguish that "February Sucks" inspired, and even that was after twenty years of repression, avoidance, and pointless inner conflict. The idea that one MUST forgive a spouse, for your own good, whether or not you reconcile, just grates on my nerves and feels like I'm chewing aluminum foil. I did that, or tried to, or failed to, and finally refused to, and then stated the cycle over and over and over again.

But I've never considered forgiving myself, the younger, love-addled fool who waltzed into the disaster and blinded himself to reality even at the early stages.


Do I owe that guy forgiveness?

I've since played out various inflection points of my personal history with alternative endings, things I "should have" said or done differently, and I've done this to the point of distraction. No, I'll be honest, I've done it to the point of obsession. But I've done it all with hindsight.

I still want to slap that kid. I'm still mad at him. I have sympathy, because I WAS that kid, but that doesn't abate the anger I've had at myself for putting up with and facilitating the abuse I suffered. But... forgiveness? For him, not for that toxic woman... well, it's something to consider. Perhaps it can happen in time.

There's so much introspection in the comments from older readers. It's not always regret, thankfully, but sometimes that's there, too. And I think that's okay, especially when it can mean growth, or at least coming to terms with what's gone before. Even in that horribly sad comment on Bramblethorn's story, there's a certain peace in, if not having lived the life they might have hoped for, finding solace in stories that deliver, vicariously, on what one has been denied or even denied oneself.

 

[leftwantingmore]

I'm going to add that along with many of my friends, we read a shit-pot of old science fiction. Heinlein, EE Smith and so many others. Crap that today is considered 'camp' was the stuff of our dreams. In the early 70's we had Penthouse forum. I was mainstream kink. There were many that you'd never see on the regular bookshelves for sale. Hardcore stuff might be on a top shelf in the used book store, but it was there. I'm talking now mid 70's.
Young people think they invented kink. My generation was told the same thing. The ONLY thing that has changed is the media.

I agree! In my youth, I voraciously read that old sci-fi. I remember finding a paperback collection of The Pearl, a monthly publication of Victorian Erotic Literature, on the top shelf in a used book store while looking for copies of Amazing Stories. I thought I found A Pot-o-Gold. I learned that kink was around a long time before me. Yes, the media has changed. "Old" readers should not be forgotten. Nice post.

 

[Actingup]

That's something I love about writing in Loving Wives, that the demographic there does tend to run older, and they're just so ready to tell you about the way something in your story parallels their lives. Here are a few of my favorites that have stuck with me, in some cases for years.

The first is from Shouldering the Burden, set in a memory care facility.



The second is from You Could Have Stayed, about a post-divorce couple eventually reconciling, told over the course of seven conversations.



The third is from Hall Past, about... well, you can probably tell from the name.



There's so much introspection in the comments from older readers. It's not always regret, thankfully, but sometimes that's there, too. And I think that's okay, especially when it can mean growth, or at least coming to terms with what's gone before. Even in that horribly sad comment on Bramblethorn's story, there's a certain peace in, if not having lived the life they might have hoped for, finding solace in stories that deliver, vicariously, on what one has been denied or even denied oneself.

Oh my.. those are wonderful examples. Thanks for (I never use this word) curating them and for your thoughts. And at the risk of another LW thread, I think that the point about painful lived experience is not always understood by us authors.

 

[StillStunned]

I’ve had some lovely convos with older people here.

 

[alohadave]

View attachment 2567436

Also: Fuck I feel old.

It's getting to the point where there are 25 year olds born after 2000 and they are like an alien species. I'm nearly twice their age. Their points of reference are so completely different. I just wonder if this is what it was like for my parents and grandparents, like you are ever so slowly becoming disconnected from culture.

 

[THBGato]

don't have it at hand to quote, but I had a really sad one from an older woman who was gay but never acted on it - "too late for me so these stories are the closest I can get" kind of thing :-/

I think I've had the exact same comment on Forty

Thank you for the story! Very touching. I don't know how do I make this a reality for myself. I don't think it's in the cards for me anymore, the years are getting shorter by the minute. But reading these stories gives me an outlet, and brings so much joy I'm lacking otherwise. Thank you, may you never stop writing if I can wish so selfishly.

Bitter-sweet in every sense.

 

[iwatchus]

Also: Fuck I feel old.

It's getting to the point where there are 25 year olds born after 2000 and they are like an alien species. I'm nearly twice their age. Their points of reference are so completely different. I just wonder if this is what it was like for my parents and grandparents, like you are ever so slowly becoming disconnected from culture.

I have students, college students mind you, who I am almost four times older than. I have been surprised by hw many people in the forum are older than me. You are still a youngster.

 

[Actingup]

@NoTalentHack’s comment reminded me a well known LW reader, Buster2U. I’ve quoted him previously in relation to his fun thoughts on a story with some borderline behaviour:

But if my wife was in another guys room at a hotel without prior approval it would be automatic divorce. She comes back to the room all "flustered"??? LOL she was fucking probably! I'd leave her there in the foreign country and come home and divorce her. What a slut! I tell her "In what world are you living in that makes it 'OK' to let another man take you shopping and then return to his room to try everything on for him. Take me there now so I can shoot him or at the very least beat the fuck out of him for fucking my wife! YOU FUCKING LOWLIFE POS SLUT1" That is how I would handle it. Thanks, Buster2U

(So polite at the end there!)

But for the story I referenced at the start of this thread, Buster came back and said:

It is rough getting old, so many guilts, and so much heartache. Why did we make it this long? Why were others taken from us so early? Life is a mystery and each day a blessing.

That’s lived experience, oozing out of every pore. It turns out that Buster is not just a ball of coiled anger after all.