Task Ideas for Inexperienced Sub

[nakedginger]

Try being naked in a common Keller or basement and lock your clothes inside home. The thrill of being caught heightens everytime someone crosses the staircase and it's absolute futile to escape when someone really comes down

Or volunteer for a life drawing class?

 

[seekingAlpha]

Really quick things: do not wear any underwear, tie dental floss around her nipples, wear a butt plug, thumbtacks in bra, orgasm in car, orgasm in public restroom, app controlled insertable sex toy, edge for set amount of time, no orgasms without explicit permission, have a certain number of orgasms, watch a certain type of porn, write an erotic story, exhibitionist acts, write on self with magic marker, report back on assignment, flirt with 3 people... The number of things that can be done are only limited by the Dom's imagination and experience. My subs always have assignments and quite a bit of the assignments take place when they are not with me. Since BDSM is not only about sex, I always start out by asking them an area in their life that they would like to improve and also focus on that area for assignments. Examples: make a budget, exercise plan, learn a hobby, learn a skill, or any kind of self-improvement. As a Dom, I always invest in my subs and focus on their growth.

 

[Newreality]

I find with a new sub it's best to break things in slowly. Have patience and take your time. Let's say, this start slow. For instance, do a few test dives to periscope depth. Once the sub is comfortable, then you can step it up to crash dives.

 

[Hypocrites]

Positions are a good way for the inexperienced sub to both acclimate to being submissive and learn the basics of presentation.

I have used multiple positions for structure and for punishment. Your sub needs to understand what the positions are at the very least. In my case @HyposMuse also understands the purpose. Positions are something that can be done simply, even while you're separated.

I find it important to train her on MY way as the same commands might mean a different posture, arm position, etc. It's useful in A) aligning your submissive with your standards. Not an artifact of some other dom/domme which is less of an influence in the inexperienced.

I tend to keep it simple. I use a few basic and a couple of punitive positions. One or two word commands and we practice to simply reinforce her skills and to stay connected when we're not together.

All in all it's a good starting point with any sub but especially the less experienced..

 

[SirSparky]

There's an app I use with my sub as she's remote for now. It's the Obedience App by Embrace. It's on an app store and has a red collar and padlock for a label. Lest yo get the one for your dog by mistake.

Assigning tasks, in my case they are health habits or some other sub building affirmation. The sub earns points that can be used to purchase special rewards or banked to recieve a special reward when you meet FTF.

There are punishments you build. Deducting points, requiring some kind of penance, etc.

Mine often spends hers for guided masturbatory training as an example.

Added In Edit: This teaches a sub how to maintain discipline, become habitual in their habits and be obedient even when you're apart. Mine loves it. She found it.

Ive used this app in the past and really does work for remote and online dynamics

 

[UsuallyPresent]

Edge for, say, 5 or 10 minutes every even hour while awake. No orgasm allowed! Adjust timing to match opportunity & environment. Require notification of successful completion - text messages talking around it or other more-or-less secure alternatives. Can add to this - longer ‘warmup’ on waking before the day starts, for example, or as soon as they’re alone at night, depending on what you’re trying to instill.

Physical exercise is a good one, depending on fitness & functionality. If in a safe environment like an indoor track or pool think about adding mental complexities. Things like, "every time you turn - twice per lap for track or pool - imagine a hand squeezing something sexy - buttock, breast, ball, never the same thing twice in a row." Require reporting of best & worst mental imagery they chose.

Have them write up & rank fetishes, from "Yes Please!", "Sounds like fun", "Maybe", "Probably not" & "No way". Once they’ve gone thru and done that, have them research a new fetish/kink & rate it periodically - daily/weekly. May inject a list of your own making that includes things not on their initial list which interest you. Be ready for things you love to be ‘no-way’s and things you won’t do to show up as ‘yes please’, and be ready to discuss. Not pressure, but explain your own take on one if there’s a major difference - there likely will be several.

You may notice I’m big on reporting & rating. It’s just another way to exercise (‘sexercize’?) the imagination & libedo while also keeping track of the sub’s experience.

 

[HyposMuse]

Hi!
As someone who has been in a few online dynamics, here are some tasks I enjoyed. Daily rituals like sending a good morning and goodnight message, practicing a short kneeling or posture exercise, or reciting affirmations give me structure.
Acts of service still work online, like keeping a space tidy, organizing something with intention, or creating a small gesture of care and sharing it with a photo.
Mindfulness tasks are helpful too, such as practicing stillness, focusing on breath, or checking off small habits for accountability.
Creative ones are fun, like writing short letters about what submission meant that day, making playlists, or having my appearance controlled in specific ways.
Aftercare is especially important without physical intimacy because there is no touch or closeness to help regulate. I find things like wrapping up in a blanket, slowly drinking tea or water, journaling my feelings, or grounding through my senses give me that needed reset and keep me safe and steady even from afar. I even have a toolbox built in a gdoc of different grounding techniques in case I need when highly escalated.

Using Obedience has been a real game changer for sure so I do highly recommend!

 

[UsuallyPresent]

-snip-.
Aftercare is especially important without physical intimacy because there is no touch or closeness to help regulate. I find things like wrapping up in a blanket, slowly drinking tea or water, journaling my feelings, or grounding through my senses give me that needed reset and keep me safe and steady even from afar. I even have a toolbox built in a gdoc of different grounding techniques in case I need when highly escalated.

Agreed, very important.

Long-distance generally requires a lot more work at communicating- and coming back from subspace can be easier with a caring voice.

For some, having a big pillow or large stuffed animal to hug can help.

Hot showers/baths may also be useful, as well as lukewarm or even cold showers. Just watch the footing, grab bars are very cheap compared to a hospital trip.

Some subs I know like weighted blankets to help ground themselves, but those are generally not a good idea in hot weather imo.

For a few, exercise helps, but probably that’s pretty rare with the coordination loss most experience coming out of subspace.

Try ‘em carefully, use what works for you and let the rest fall by the wayside.

 

[SirSparky]

Hi!
As someone who has been in a few online dynamics, here are some tasks I enjoyed. Daily rituals like sending a good morning and goodnight message, practicing a short kneeling or posture exercise, or reciting affirmations give me structure.
Acts of service still work online, like keeping a space tidy, organizing something with intention, or creating a small gesture of care and sharing it with a photo.
Mindfulness tasks are helpful too, such as practicing stillness, focusing on breath, or checking off small habits for accountability.
Creative ones are fun, like writing short letters about what submission meant that day, making playlists, or having my appearance controlled in specific ways.
Aftercare is especially important without physical intimacy because there is no touch or closeness to help regulate. I find things like wrapping up in a blanket, slowly drinking tea or water, journaling my feelings, or grounding through my senses give me that needed reset and keep me safe and steady even from afar. I even have a toolbox built in a gdoc of different grounding techniques in case I need when highly escalated.

Using Obedience has been a real game changer for sure so I do highly recommend!

These are exactly like the tasks I like to give. I want to give my sub structure in her daily life. Make her accountable and a better version of herself.

 

[Darkweather]

Good to see more experiences and ideas being shared!

Hi!
As someone who has been in a few online dynamics, here are some tasks I enjoyed. Daily rituals like sending a good morning and goodnight message, practicing a short kneeling or posture exercise, or reciting affirmations give me structure.
Acts of service still work online, like keeping a space tidy, organizing something with intention, or creating a small gesture of care and sharing it with a photo.
Mindfulness tasks are helpful too, such as practicing stillness, focusing on breath, or checking off small habits for accountability.
Creative ones are fun, like writing short letters about what submission meant that day, making playlists, or having my appearance controlled in specific ways.
Aftercare is especially important without physical intimacy because there is no touch or closeness to help regulate. I find things like wrapping up in a blanket, slowly drinking tea or water, journaling my feelings, or grounding through my senses give me that needed reset and keep me safe and steady even from afar. I even have a toolbox built in a gdoc of different grounding techniques in case I need when highly escalated.

Using Obedience has been a real game changer for sure so I do highly recommend!

Thanks for sharing and this is very helpful. I am strong on building routine and structure as much as possible and agree aftercare still has a place even in remote circumstances. I had not considered kneeling/posture and focus exercises (important for a student in any case) but many other examples you have described have started to become part of the regular tasks and routines!

 

[CaptCharles]

Hi!
As someone who has been in a few online dynamics, here are some tasks I enjoyed. Daily rituals like sending a good morning and goodnight message, practicing a short kneeling or posture exercise, or reciting affirmations give me structure.
Acts of service still work online, like keeping a space tidy, organizing something with intention, or creating a small gesture of care and sharing it with a photo.
Mindfulness tasks are helpful too, such as practicing stillness, focusing on breath, or checking off small habits for accountability.
Creative ones are fun, like writing short letters about what submission meant that day, making playlists, or having my appearance controlled in specific ways.
Aftercare is especially important without physical intimacy because there is no touch or closeness to help regulate. I find things like wrapping up in a blanket, slowly drinking tea or water, journaling my feelings, or grounding through my senses give me that needed reset and keep me safe and steady even from afar. I even have a toolbox built in a gdoc of different grounding techniques in case I need when highly escalated.

Using Obedience has been a real game changer for sure so I do highly recommend!

I like the daily ritual aspects of your tasks ... this brings more physical presence to the process.

 

[CaptCharles]

Edge for, say, 5 or 10 minutes every even hour while awake. No orgasm allowed! Adjust timing to match opportunity & environment. Require notification of successful completion - text messages talking around it or other more-or-less secure alternatives. Can add to this - longer ‘warmup’ on waking before the day starts, for example, or as soon as they’re alone at night, depending on what you’re trying to instill.

Physical exercise is a good one, depending on fitness & functionality. If in a safe environment like an indoor track or pool think about adding mental complexities. Things like, "every time you turn - twice per lap for track or pool - imagine a hand squeezing something sexy - buttock, breast, ball, never the same thing twice in a row." Require reporting of best & worst mental imagery they chose.

Have them write up & rank fetishes, from "Yes Please!", "Sounds like fun", "Maybe", "Probably not" & "No way". Once they’ve gone thru and done that, have them research a new fetish/kink & rate it periodically - daily/weekly. May inject a list of your own making that includes things not on their initial list which interest you. Be ready for things you love to be ‘no-way’s and things you won’t do to show up as ‘yes please’, and be ready to discuss. Not pressure, but explain your own take on one if there’s a major difference - there likely will be several.

You may notice I’m big on reporting & rating. It’s just another way to exercise (‘sexercize’?) the imagination & libedo while also keeping track of the sub’s experience.

I particularly like the idea of the fetish examinations.
I like to be spontaneous and this would lead to some interesting new task formats. thank you

 

[UsuallyPresent]

I particularly like the idea of the fetish examinations.
I like to be spontaneous and this would lead to some interesting new task formats. thank you

Glad to have helped.