A place for my poem(s)

[Sn0wBelle]

Things I learnt from you

How to open up and be vulnerable
How to kiss with tongues
How to feel loved and wanted and give that back in return
How to block out the guilt
How to be deceitful

When to be quiet
When to let out a scream
When to have courage and believe in myself
When to shut out the real world
When to not care

Where to find a cosy bed
Where to find the best chicken
Where to go when I need to escape
Where to shelter
Where to hide

And most importantly
Never to get caught

 

[WCSGarland]

Welcome

 

[Sn0wBelle]

Marriage

There are those who understand what it's like
To be taken for granted
To get worn down
To feel unsupported
To give up hope
To regret that promise you made all those years ago
To remain trapped
To grow cold
To need attention
To long for intimacy and affection
To wish for a hug
To never be told 'I love you'
And there are the lucky ones that don't.

 

[Tyrantino]

Thank you for sharing these poems with us, Sn0wBelle. I'm sure that they will be the first of many.

Some verses are especially bitter, but life is not rosy, is it?

 

[Sn0wBelle]

What I love about coffee is its comfort
What I hate about capybaras is their fur
What I love about rain is its misery
What I hate about London is its despair
What I love about the lake is the calm
What I hate about Seville is the sunburn
What I love about Belle is her playfulness
What I hate about Snow is her rigidity
What I hate about love is its vials of poison
What I love about schadenfreude is its knife edge
What I hate about kindness is its effort
What I love about love is a cliché... It's you.

 

[Sn0wBelle]

Love Letter

What I loved about my time with Sn0wbelle

The way you pounced on me for a hug straight away. Kissing you and feeling you really respond when I put my tongue in your mouth. Feeling how wet you get for me and sliding three fingers inside you... You know I find it hot to finger you and see how many you can take. Fucking you slowly and just teasing you with the head of my cock, it makes me really hard. I loved you wrapping your legs around me and wanting to take me as deep as possible. I loved that you made a wet patch under us, it turns me on so much to know that you're into it that much (as much as me!) I loved licking and sucking on your pussy with my fingers inside you, I love the feel of your hand on my cock... I loved rubbing your asshole, just to see what you'd do but not pushing it

 

[butters]

What I love about rain is its misery
What I hate about London is its despair

What I hate about kindness is its effort

these three lines especially caught my attention

 

[Sn0wBelle]

Random Thoughts From My Notebook

There was a time when I was the most important thing in the world to you. I miss that time.

You used to need me. Now you don't. I can feel it. You are slipping away like sand through my fingers.

You deserve to be happy. But why is that at the expense of my unhappiness.

You are so distant. You no longer know what is going on in my head. Because you've stopped asking. I would tell you... But I sense that you no longer care.

I think you've damaged this beyond repair...

In my imagination we had the perfect little life together. I loved you. But you didn't share that imagination with me. I wasn't ever enough for you. I wasn't what you wanted. I was never in your future plans.

You fixed me. Then you smashed me apart again.

Everything is tainted with memories of you. Every thought. Every object. Every place I go. Because I took you with me everywhere.

I was afraid to open my heart and let you in because I know how it ends. But you made me. You forced your way in. You showed me the affection you knew I needed. You filled a hole in my life. The missing piece. Then you left. And I can't get back to who I was before. Because the hole is now bigger. I don't know how to do life without you here.

I wish a had a switch like you. To turn my feelings off.

You gave me a glimpse of how life could be. That was a cruel thing to do. Because I can't ever unsee that. And you are no longer here to take me to that life.

I don't feel anything anymore. I'm emotionally numb.

 

[Sn0wBelle]

Random notes from my broken heart....

Every day I try to become a better person. One you would have picked. One you would have stayed for.

How do you grieve the loss of a secret? Who is there to tell? Who is there to share that with?

I silently cry myself to sleep at night and wake at 4am to cry some more. I go for a run in the rain, with tears streaming down my face. Some days I walk to the beach and cry into the sea. On Wednesdays I am alone and I cry for hours.

Your ship is sailing. You are off on an exciting new adventure. The whole world ahead of you. Full of hope and promise. New things to discover.
My ship is sinking.

Did you know the last time we kissed, that it would be the last? The last time you would be inside me, the last time my legs would wrap around you, my arms pulling you in so tight, when you made me cum one last time. Did you know it would be the last meal we would ever eat together? The last coffee we would drink, after sex, in bed. When you left me at the bus stop and walked away... Did you know?

I found a video message from you on my phone. Your face was rounder then. I saw you so often, I hadn't noticed the weight you'd lost. You were sending me the message because you missed me. You missed me because we hadn't been able to call each other for a week. A week! How does it feel now? How does forever feel? The message was simple. Just a 'hello, I miss you'. But it was the thought behind it that broke me. You missed me and you wanted me to know that. You wanted me to know that you cared. That you were thinking about me. That I was important to you. It made me wonder....when did that change for you? When did that stop? When did you no longer feel the desire to put a smile on my face? When you sent me that video, I know it filled me with happiness. I felt loved. But I didn't realise that you wouldn't always be there. That the messages would stop. The love would stop. I took you for granted.

You used to think about me so much that you wrote me notes on bananas.

We never said 'I love you'. Apart from that one time near the beginning when it accidentally slipped from your lips during sex. But I know you meant the sex. That you loved the sex. It was fucking amazing between us.

Did you feel relief when you left me? Was it a huge weight lifted? Did you feel free? No longer having to put up with me. No longer obliged to pretend to care. How long had I been a burden? When did I become a chore? How long since I stopped bringing anything positive to your life? How long was I reading meaning behind your words, when they were actually empty? I was a bad habit you were finally able to kick.

You were never real.