Tell Blatant Lies About....Yourself

[BDA73]

Took only 2 licks to get to the center of the pop

 

[EctoJohn]

Before the rule changes, I had over 100 naughty pics of myself here on Lit.

 

[SusanHoward]

I never have sexy thoughts about guys in uniform!

 

[kellyt1994]

I won 1st division in lotto last night.
And I'm not going to give up my job because of the huge win.

Hey baby . . ., whatcha doin''?

 

[raceryz]

Iam tall dark and sexy

 

[Carmina24]

I once gave someone an orgasm just by raising my eyebrow.

 

[jeff_is_smiling]

I've never cum in a woman's mouth after promising I wouldn't...

 

[Jordan90]

Yoga pants on ladies are pretty boring. I'm just kinda like, "meh..."

 

[Joeysmitty]

I'm short

 

[EctoJohn]

I was able to retire early.

 

[Trubbycat]

People compliment me on my prominent bulge.

 

[kellyt1994]

I've never been diagnosed with any sort of subthreshold symptoms.

 

[Taegul]

I taught Chuck Norris karate.

I also taught him acting, but I don't brag about that one.

 

[Mewalkabout]

I lick onions for a snack

 

[Taegul]

I lick onions for a snack

Frozen? On a stick? That sounds good.

 

[ScarletDaisy]

I am very graceful.

 

[Mewalkabout]

I yell at trees on weekends

 

[Lilycece]

I hate masturbating

 

[Quimpossibility]

I created the shipping forecast

 

[EctoJohn]

I'm not hating life right now, just peachy.

 

[SusanHoward]

I never seem to win at strip poker!

 

[~Elizabeth~]

I slept all night like a baby.

 

[LatinaCarmen1980]

I'm going to spend the whole day doing household chores.

 

[CX726577]

I'm looking forward to pulling more weeds.

 

[sluttymood]

all my lovers have treated me with respect