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Claims to be fluent in Chinese, but only knows how to order food in Chinese restaurants.
Claims to have made a vow of celibacy, but I think we all know better.
Answers the phone during sex!He's looking for a loophole. Some sort of sex that God can't see.
Evalutes your performance and then gives you a scorecard after.He doesn't realize that better offers can come at any time.
Runs around with a bucket of water and a broom wiping out others sidewalk art.
Dons a condom… calls it his shield maiden.Wishes to be ravaged by a large cocked savage Viking. Oh yeah, I forgot this was to be lies.
Hears the term “muff diving” and remembers he needs to bring his car in for service.@kellyt1994 Used to do Olympic class diving.
Stars in the video, “So you want to go muff diving!”Waves at fellows and says it’s not sexy when mentioning muff diving