Would this story be allowed?

[WCSGarland]

It sure does seem like there is quite a bit of kink shaming in this thread despite all the protests that people aren't kink shaming.

 

[FrancesScott]

It sure does seem like there is quite a bit of kink shaming in this thread despite all the protests that people aren't kink shaming.

Want to contribute something positive? Do you like reading non-consent? If so, then tell us why. I am really trying to understand the fascination. Is that a problem?

I really see nothing wrong in seeking understanding. But YMMV.

 

[FrancesScott]

It sure does seem like there is quite a bit of kink shaming in this thread despite all the protests that people aren't kink shaming.

I see you like writing non-consent. An insight to your motivations would be very illuminating. What turns you on about the subject? Has it always been something you are interested in?

 

[WCSGarland]

Demanding a why reads as if you are expecting justification. Expecting justification reads as if you are being judgmental and that reads as kink-shaming... especially in a public forum.

 

[FrancesScott]

Demanding a why reads as if you are expecting justification. Expecting justification reads as if you are being judgmental and that reads as kink-shaming... especially in a public forum.

Demanding is setting up a straw-man to knock it down. I asked very politely.

Recently an excellent Lit author asked people why they like monster porn in the Chat area, she wrote a story partly based on the answers. She got interesting answers, not defensiveness. Why is it different asking about why people like non-con? If you aren’t ashamed, show it by answering openly and honestly. As if someone has asked why you like women in leather. If it’s just a kink like any other, what is the problem answering honest questions about it?

 

[Cagivagurl]

It sorta is though.

Take the fantasy out and boil rape down to it's base motivation. Everyone say's it's dominance, and that's the most common type true, but there's also miscommunication, which is the most tragic type, and a false sense of entitlement, which I guess could link back to dominance.

Now put the fantasy back in and you loose the least likely of miscommunication and are left with dominance and entitlement, rape fantasy's are about the man dominating, or getting what he is owed from the man's viewpoint.

And then you have CNC - Consensual Non Consent. Which is very much a D/s thing. My SO before we had kids enjoyed setting up a few of these scenarios with me, and while he enjoys reading CNC stories, he doesn't like actual noncon stories, and the reluctance stories he enjoys are ones were the girl is reluctant because she doesn't think she should even though she really wants to.

He's got a bit of a corruption fetish, when we first got together he got aroused every time he got me to cuss.

But anyways, CNC and noncon stories are not the same as each other, but as far as I can tell they both play on similar fetishes. And CNC is a D/s thing.

Consensual non consent is not non consent... The person has given permission....
In my mind it's a ridiculous title... Once permission is given. It is no longer non consensual...
For people / couples playing those games it's fine... A fantasy play... All good, because permission has been granted.

Non consensual sex is somebody being forced against there will to undergo sex...
Rape is not sexy, and bodies do not betray the victim... That is a male generated myth so they can have their fantasy and hide behind.
"She's going to enjoy it..."

My opinion only...

Cagivagurl

 

[filthytrancendence]

Submitting is giving your power to a dominant, being dominated without submitting is having your power taken from you. Which in the right setting and with the right partner can be very freeing.

Just like most women who have rape fantasy's though, most men who have them would never go through with them, and if circumstances forced them to they very likely would themselves be traumatized by the event.

I guess I'm the only man participating in this one, so...?

Anyway, I get what you're saying but I think using the dominance/submission dynamic here is confusing the issue. It's not technically wrong, from the standpoint of what those words mean, but it is certainly wrong from the standpoint of what they mean within BDSM. And my little internal alarm starts going off when we start edging toward conflating BDSM with abuse or SA. If something is abuse or SA, then it just simply is not BDSM, by definition.

I don't mean that as a no true scotsman-type cop out. Just that the consensual framework of actual BDSM precludes abuse and SA. If that framework isn't being followed, then it's not really BDSM.

Anyway, I can't speak to why a man would find rape fantasy appealing, because I do not. I can, however speak as a man who is viscerally repulsed by rape and is also into BDSM as a switch. I don't see a connection there, from either the dominant or submissive side. Nor am I particularly comfortable with flirting with the bolded line in the quote. Brat dynamics are about as far as I'm personally willing to take that one.

I'm not trying to say no connection is possible. Only that no connection is inherent, as evidenced by me.

 

[FrancesScott]

My opinion only...

Not only yours.

 

[FrancesScott]

I can, however speak as a man who is viscerally repulsed by rape and is also into BDSM as a switch. I don't see a connection there, from either the dominant or submissive side.

In my limited experience, BDSM is highly consensual IRL. Not so much in fantasies written by people with zero actual experience of the area.

 

[WCSGarland]

Demanding is setting up a straw-man to knock it down. I asked very politely.

Recently an excellent Lit author asked people why they like monster porn in the Chat area, she wrote a story partly based on the answers. She got interesting answers, not defensiveness. Why is it different asking about why people like non-con? If you aren’t ashamed, show it by answering openly and honestly. As if someone has asked why you like women in leather. If it’s just a kink like any other, what is the problem answering honest questions about it?

You didn't start this thread though. You didn't start a thread by asking why people like to write NC, you responded to somebody else's question about NC by demanding a why.

 

[filthytrancendence]

Can you help me, please? Why do you want to write a story like that?

demanding a why.

Weirdest demand I've ever seen.

 

[FrancesScott]

You didn't start this thread though. You didn't start a thread by asking why people like to write NC, you responded to somebody else's question about NC by demanding a why.

Again. What’s the problem with asking questions? Why does that upset you, as it clearly does?

If someone asked me why I write lesbian stories, I’d just answer. I’d not get ultra-defensive from the get go. What is different about you and this subject?

 

[FrancesScott]

Weirdest demand I've ever seen.

Demands are in the eye of the beholder.

 

[SimonDoom]

Can you help me, please? Why do you want to write a story like that? What is appealing to you about it? I’m not looking to bust your balls, just to understand the attraction of writing non-consensual sex. I have to admit that I just don’t get it.

It's one of the most popular erotic fantasies there is. There's a lot that goes into it. The idea of surrenduring control is appealing to many. The idea of being dominated. Many people are conflicted about sex, so the idea of getting to enjoy it but not having any responsibility for it happening is a thrill.

 

[filthytrancendence]

Demands are in the eye of the beholder.

The eye of the beholder doth protest too much, methinks.

 

[SimonDoom]

Nonconsent is not one of my favorite kinks, but i sort of get it. Remember that it's one of the most popular fantasies for women, not just men.

 

[NuclearFairy]

Consensual non consent is not non consent... The person has given permission....
In my mind it's a ridiculous title... Once permission is given. It is no longer non consensual...
For people / couples playing those games it's fine... A fantasy play... All good, because permission has been granted.

Non consensual sex is somebody being forced against there will to undergo sex...
Rape is not sexy, and bodies do not betray the victim... That is a male generated myth so they can have their fantasy and hide behind.
"She's going to enjoy it..."

My opinion only...

Cagivagurl

They were asking about why people enjoy rape fantasies, which the reasons for are closer to why people enjoy CNC than the reasons for why people rape, and CNC falls within the BDSM spectrum.

I guess I'm the only man participating in this one, so...?

Anyway, I get what you're saying but I think using the dominance/submission dynamic here is confusing the issue. It's not technically wrong, from the standpoint of what those words mean, but it is certainly wrong from the standpoint of what they mean within BDSM. And my little internal alarm starts going off when we start edging toward conflating BDSM with abuse or SA. If something is abuse or SA, then it just simply is not BDSM, by definition.

I don't mean that as a no true scotsman-type cop out. Just that the consensual framework of actual BDSM precludes abuse and SA. If that framework isn't being followed, then it's not really BDSM.

Anyway, I can't speak to why a man would find rape fantasy appealing, because I do not. I can, however speak as a man who is viscerally repulsed by rape and is also into BDSM as a switch. I don't see a connection there, from either the dominant or submissive side. Nor am I particularly comfortable with flirting with the bolded line in the quote. Brat dynamics are about as far as I'm personally willing to take that one.

I'm not trying to say no connection is possible. Only that no connection is inherent, as evidenced by me.

Yes conflating SA with BDSM is wrong. However BDSM is an umbrella, and sometimes, some people, want to be dominated without submitting, and that I believe falls within BDSM. Especially if it comes with communication and safe words. I personally believe that the desire to be dominated, or to dominate without submission is where CNC and rape fantasy without actual desire to rape comes from. However, while CNC is something that falls within BDSM, rape fantasies are not, even though they might feed some of the same desires that can lead someone to BDSM. And since they were asking the why, I had to go into discussions of dominating and submitting and how they differ.

 

[WCSGarland]

I’m not looking to bust your balls, just to understand the attraction of writing non-consensual sex.

passive-aggressive kink shaming is what it looks like to me. try reading some of the good stories in that category, or better yet, try writing it yourself. there is more to nc than just rape, and I get tired of pointing that out.

 

[filthytrancendence]

I get tired of pointing that out.

I imagine you must, since you seem to go out of your way to point it out, even when it's not occurring. Sounds exhausting.

 

[WCSGarland]

I imagine you must, since you seem to go out of your way to point it out, even when it's not occurring. Sounds exhausting.

Really, you follow me and all my comments?

 

[filthytrancendence]

Really, you follow me and all my comments?

I don't think I could handle the excitement.

 

[WCSGarland]

I don't think I could handle the excitement.

Then what the hell are you doing around here?

 

[filthytrancendence]

Then what the hell are you doing around here?

Having a little bit too much fun fucking with you, apparently.

But I am done. The last word is yours if you want it

 

[TheRedChamber]

I'm tempted to lob in the single sentence granade 'Because I like to see women suffer' and see where the thread goes from there. It wouldn't be true in my case, I'm way more of a masochist than a sadist, but the fact I like pain for no necessarily deeper reason suggests the logical existance of people who like to inflict it for no necessarily deeper reason. Such people might be wise not to answer too honestly on this thread.

Either the OP is doing something more productive or we've scared them off. However...

I have a very wide 'kink spectrum' I've at least explored most different proclivities - either in real life or in porn. These tend to rotate and a particular fascination might not last more than a few weeks. I would also idenify myself as about 10% gay, and thats also a 'kink' that rotates in and out. I'm not trans because I don't think my body should be female, but I do think being female would be fun and often watch porn from the perspective of the woman (or women). In fact, I'm perfectly capable of watching cuckolding porn and wanting to be the husband, the wife and the lover all at the same time.

On that basis, I have 'gay prison rape' fantasies. Not commonly but they do come around every now and then. I also have 'being raped or coerced as a woman (by a man who definitely isnt me)' fantasies. These might not be particularly politically correct but then fantasy doesn't have to be. (At least that's an agreement thats been raging on another thread and doesnt need to be settled here.) I also have 'Controlled and humiliated as a man by a sadistic woman' fantasies.

 

[FrancesScott]

nc than just rape

Non-consent is rape, by definition. That’s what rape is, forcing someone to have sex without their consent. What are these sexual activities that are are non-consensual but also not rape? I guess my imagination too limited to think of any.