Cock Talk

4. The incubus that hits me with dream orgasms when it's been too long.
Incubus is my dream job. I would love to be the apparition who appears under women’s blankets and pleasures them in every way possible, watching them writhe and contort under my cock, tongue and fingers.

I would be the Santa Clause of Semen.

He spoke not a word, but went right to his work,
He tantalized my clit’s every kink and quirk,
And sticking his finger up his own ass,
he rose up the chimney to fuck another Lass. 😛
 
"Dear LitHouse Forum,

I felt I just had to write and tell you about a completely fictional incident which happened in my imagination only last week!

My wife and I had been going through a dry patch, which only got worse when she caught me sitting in a bath of cold baked beans, masturbating to a 1980s Mr T workout video and using WD40 as lube. So, with our sex life going as well as an Iranian nuclear centrifuge, obviously I found myself here on Literotica! And I'm so glad I did!

One day, I was sitting in an extremely crowded Wendy's reading staggeringly explicit incest stories on my tablet, when I heard someone walk up behind me. Luckily, I had nothing to be embarrassed about because there were no pictures of anything really scandalous like...a woman wearing a bra...so I just carried on reading. To my complete surprise, it turned out to be my wife, her three sisters, their husbands, Grandpa and Grandma, and their pet chihuahua Snuffles! No sooner had my wife glanced at what I was reading than her panties immediately dissolved in a hot mess of family lust, and we barely had time to check that Snuffles was over eighteen before the orgy started right there and then! Even the employees who came over to make the obligatory 'Sir, this is a Wendy's!' joke just stripped off and joined in the family fucking!

Well, from that day on, my wife and I have had the Best Sex Life Ever! In fact, while I'm writing this, I'm sitting in a bath of cold baked beans, and she's dressed up as Mr T, complete with gold chains, growling "Don't Push Me!" in my ear as she drips the WD40 on my cock for the hand job of my dreams!

And it would never have happened without LitHouse Forum!"

---------

This is slightly more plausible than my answering "yes" to any of these questions.
Wait . . . .


You're married? 😲



:p
 
Have you ever been caught looking at porn as an adult?
Have you ever caught your partner, or saw something “interesting” in their search history (by accident, of course)?
Do you enjoy porn as a couple? What genres?
What is the one category of porn you look at that you really, really don’t want your partner to know about?
Do you leave evidence of your porn choices to encourage or entice your partner with, knowing they’ll see?
If you were to cast your partner in a porn genre, which would it be? What about yourself?

No, I haven't.

No, I haven't.

Not really.

Nothing - I'm an open book.

No, no need.

oof that's difficult -no one wants to see that anyway!
 
No, I haven't.

No, I haven't.

Not really.

Nothing - I'm an open book.

No, no need.

oof that's difficult -no one wants to see that anyway!
Lmao well, now that I know you so intimately! 😋

Justttt teasing. Come on now, tell us me all about the porn categories you think MIGHT raise an eyebrow from a curious on looker? What about one you might be surprised, aroused, disgusted with your partner watching? Tell us me, would you be on the casting couch or behind the POV camera?

The problem with open books is you’re leaving the effort up to everyone else to turn the pages and get to know you. You have to give us something first, a cover, synopsis, something.
 
Come on now, tell us me all about the porn categories you think MIGHT raise an eyebrow from a curious on looker?
I think we all look, or have looked, at something we’d rather not have people know. That’s what I like about these kind of questions, when you don’t get juicy answers that tells you there’s a lot of juicy answers! 😛
 
Literotica Fact states that all of our sexual awakenings did NOT happen until our 18th birthdays and that FACT will not be disputed here.

*all of these questions, and your subsequent answers, take place after your 18th birthday. 👍

Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? Your Mom’s Playgirls? Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch? Did you hack the parental controls? What was your introduction into sexy stuff?
Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
How did you hide your porn? Did you hide it? What was it?
Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
 
I think we all look, or have looked, at something we’d rather not have people know. That’s what I like about these kind of questions, when you don’t get juicy answers that tells you there’s a lot of juicy answers! 😛
IMG_7408.jpeg

There’s a difference between the answers being juicy and just not being for consumption of everyone everywhere 😜
 
Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Absolutely freaking not.

Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? Your Mom’s Playgirls? Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch? Did you hack the parental controls? What was
your introduction into sexy stuff?
Yes. No. No. No. See first answer.

Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
What? They were not!!! 😳

How did you hide your porn? Did you hide it? What was it?
N/A. Nope. None.

Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
Definitely matured and taken form. Mine used to be quite nebulous.

How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
Mine came about because there had been some attacks in the large park I had to walk across to get to elementary school. My mother had a pamphlet. I remember, quite distinctly, being utterly appalled and horrified. 🤣
 
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? What was
your introduction into sexy stuff?
Yes. See first answer.
I wonder how many millions of people were introduced to sex by their Dad’s Playboy.
I also wonder what today’s equivalent is?
Discovering your Dad’s search history?

Let’s see, he looked up some actuarial tables for tomorrow’s presentation, sent Aunt Martha a Happy Birthday e-mail, looked at some bisexual strap-on porn, then forwarded a warning about a Nigerian Prince online scam to every single person he’s ever met, then went to bed.
 
Literotica Fact states that all of our sexual awakenings did NOT happen until our 18th birthdays and that FACT will not be disputed here.

*all of these questions, and your subsequent answers, take place after your 18th birthday. 👍

Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Oh my god. WAY too much.
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? Your Mom’s Playgirls? Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch? Did you hack the parental controls? What was your introduction into sexy stuff?
Yes. My mom bought a giant box of playboys at a garage sale and made them freely available. She got so much shit from her friends about the r-rated stuff she let me watch. But there was usually a conversation had before or after that made them way less fun 🤣. I have no clear memory of discovering that porn was a thing. But I also had the fun of the older boy in the neighborhood sharing his secret playboy stash. That was WAY more interesting than the stuff my mom gave us. Which, was like, probably the point and says some things that I’m not gonna unravel here.
Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
How did you hide your porn? Did you hide it? What was it?
Even though my family was very open I was mortified at the thought. I stole a pair of my dad’s porn vhs tapes while visiting him one weekend and no one ever knew where they went. Still today, I’m sure he died with that mystery hanging over him.
Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
I was indeed a pretty late starter, not 35 but still. So yeah the reality of sex did change the fantasies. But I was never that guy who thought what I saw in porn or playboy really reflected what a women wanted. I also knew more about most sex stuff than most of my sexually active teenage friends. Man theoretical knowledge has ruled my life in so many ways. Thanks mom. 🙄
 
Literotica Fact states that all of our sexual awakenings did NOT happen until our 18th birthdays and that FACT will not be disputed here.

*all of these questions, and your subsequent answers, take place after your 18th birthday. 👍

Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Yes, we had all kinds of age appropriate books about our bodies & how babies were made, etc. so I knew what to expect, and didn't really need sex-ed in school. So, I spent that time asking the weirdest, most awkward questions of the teachers just to see if I could a reaction 😇

My mom is a psychologist, as well as deeply religious, which was kind of a great mix, frankly. I grew up thinking that attraction, passion, masterbation, and "impure thoughts" were completely normal parts of life and were not sinful whatsoever, while also being taught that I had value simply by existing as a child of God, and that my life had meaning outside of what some boy thought of me.

The alchemy of knowledge & empowerment meant that I explored sexually on my own terms. With the added advantage that if I needed birth control, or became pregnant, or found myself in a toxic relationship, I knew that my mom would love & support me. It's amazing how kids bloom when they feel empowered but know they have a safety net.
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? Your Mom’s Playgirls?
My friend showed me her dad's, once. I dusky find anything of my dad's u til my early 20's and that was crumpled & dusty in the back of a drawer in his wood shop!
Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch? Did you hack the parental controls?
I'm too old for parental controls to have existed, but we didnt have HBO/Skinemax, do was do need, and my parents liked crime films, not much sex. I recall seeing boobs in films but nothing that I found remotely exciting. Though, a younger me could've watched the RHCP Under the Bridge video, and Anthony Kiedis running in slo-mo, on loop!
What was your introduction into sexy stuff?
My naturally naughty & Anette Lamb romance novels
Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
Ninja
How did you hide your porn? Did you hide it? What was it?
I read trashy novels, no need to hide them unless I was reading during a boring church service, then I just bent the paperback in half so you couldn't see the cover. Problem solved.
Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
Some have hung around, others have popped up, but nothing too drastic.
How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
See the first answer😁
 
Yes, we had all kinds of age appropriate books about our bodies & how babies were made, etc. so I knew what to expect, and didn't really need sex-ed in school. So, I spent that time asking the weirdest, most awkward questions of the teachers just to see if I could a reaction 😇

My mom is a psychologist, as well as deeply religious, which was kind of a great mix, frankly. I grew up thinking that attraction, passion, masterbation, and "impure thoughts" were completely normal parts of life and were not sinful whatsoever, while also being taught that I had value simply by existing as a child of God, and that my life had meaning outside of what some boy thought of me.

The alchemy of knowledge & empowerment meant that I explored sexually on my own terms. With the added advantage that if I needed birth control, or became pregnant, or found myself in a toxic relationship, I knew that my mom would love & support me. It's amazing how kids bloom when they feel empowered but know they have a safety net.

My friend showed me her dad's, once. I dusky find anything of my dad's u til my early 20's and that was crumpled & dusty in the back of a drawer in his wood shop!

I'm too old for parental controls to have existed, but we didnt have HBO/Skinemax, do was do need, and my parents liked crime films, not much sex. I recall seeing boobs in films but nothing that I found remotely exciting. Though, a younger me could've watched the RHCP Under the Bridge video, and Anthony Kiedis running in slo-mo, on loop!

My naturally naughty & Anette Lamb romance novels

Ninja

I read trashy novels, no need to hide them unless I was reading during a boring church service, then I just bent the paperback in half so you couldn't see the cover. Problem solved.

Some have hung around, others have popped up, but nothing too drastic.

See the first answer😁
Every time I remember you’re mom was a psychologist I’m like “yup, that tracks” 🤣
 
Literotica Fact states that all of our sexual awakenings did NOT happen until our 18th birthdays and that FACT will not be disputed here.
Sure thing dude.
*all of these questions, and your subsequent answers, take place after your 18th birthday. 👍
Fuck me. I can only remember 3 decades back and that shit is hazy enough. We good.
Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Fuck no.
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys?
No. But my bff’s dad had milk crates of penthouse letters, hustler and random strike mags in the attic. Very educational.
Your Mom’s Playgirls?
My mom has never had sex. Not sure where I came from.
Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch?
Yes. Not at my house. We didn’t have cable.
Did you hack the parental controls? What was your introduction into sexy stuff?
I had an older brother, so that friend group of his got ahold of naughty magazines and I saw them earlier than perhaps is normal?
Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
Yes. Thrice a day was pretty normal.
How did you hide your porn?
I put it under the mattress. Cause I was the only one changing the sheets.
Did you hide it? What was it?
Penthouse letters pretty much. I’ve always preferred the written stuff over pics/video
Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
Just gotten more fanciful. More kinky. At 18 I was definitely more mainstream, but still had the beginnings of kink from reading all my grandmothers romance novels.
How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
Funny story. I’d known the science of babies and also the erotica side of sex for a while when I was home alone with my dad and he started watching “the world according to garp”. The intro starts with a sperm traveling down a fallopian tube. We asked “do you know where babies come from”.

Just to be a dick and watch him squirm I said “no”.

It was a riot.

Hell, I’d been reading “the joy of sex” for like a year at that point.

Mmm, hairy armpits. 🤣
 
My mom is a psychologist, as well as deeply religious, which was kind of a great mix, frankly.
I love this!
in the back of a drawer in his wood shop!
Hahaha! Wood shop.
My mom has never had sex.
Mine neither. In fact, I don’t think any of our moms did. 👍
I think all of our dads fucked a stork or something. 🤔
I put it under the mattress.
That’s like . . . the very first place everyone looks!!! 🤣
 
Literotica Fact states that all of our sexual awakenings did NOT happen until our 18th birthdays and that FACT will not be disputed here.

*all of these questions, and your subsequent answers, take place after your 18th birthday. 👍
:ROFLMAO:
Was sex openly discussed or acknowledged in your household?
Yes it was. My mother even told me were the condoms were and That I could take there when ever I needed.
Did you discover your Dad’s Playboys? Your Mom’s Playgirls? Watch R-rated movies you weren’t supposed to watch? Did you hack the parental controls? What was your introduction into sexy stuff?
I don't think they had such stuff. But they had books that was erotic enough. And me and my friends found a paper recycling bin tat was full of porn! A very lucky day for us!
Now that you’re older than 18, do you realize that everyone knew you were masturbating, or were you a Ninja Bean Flicker/Wang Cranker?
Yes.
How did you hide your porn? Did you hide it? What was it?
I'd hide it my box for magazines.
Compared to today, have your masturbation fantasies matured, remained the same or completely changed from when you were 18?
At first my fantasies was about fucking a real girl. But after my debut the fantasies developed. But I can't say they have changed completely. I have some go to that I've had since early days.
How did “the talk” go? Did you have “the talk” or was your sexual knowledge entirely learned from the locker room until you finally had sex when you were 35?
Since I went to school in Sweden (of course) we had real sex education. It begun when we were 18 and continued with some hours every semester till we were 18. It was a part of Biology class for four years.
So Swedish people are fully skilled when they are 18 and have their debut! :D

No, kidding. ;) It was quite clinical education, but I still find it good. We all got to know how to protect our self and where to go when we wanted protection and what to do if worst scenario happened. And we got to learn about each others anatomy, even if that wasn't presented in a sexy way. That we had to learn our self. So locker room talk, reading erotic books, porn and exploring like learning by doing the fun way was needed to complete the skills. :giggle:
 
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Sure thing dude.

Fuck me. I can only remember 3 decades back and that shit is hazy enough. We good.

Fuck no.

No. But my bff’s dad had milk crates of penthouse letters, hustler and random strike mags in the attic. Very educational.

My mom has never had sex. Not sure where I came from.

Yes. Not at my house. We didn’t have cable.

I had an older brother, so that friend group of his got ahold of naughty magazines and I saw them earlier than perhaps is normal?

Yes. Thrice a day was pretty normal.


I put it under the mattress. Cause I was the only one changing the sheets.

Penthouse letters pretty much. I’ve always preferred the written stuff over pics/video

Just gotten more fanciful. More kinky. At 18 I was definitely more mainstream, but still had the beginnings of kink from reading all my grandmothers romance novels.


Funny story. I’d known the science of babies and also the erotica side of sex for a while when I was home alone with my dad and he started watching “the world according to garp”. The intro starts with a sperm traveling down a fallopian tube. We asked “do you know where babies come from”.

Just to be a dick and watch him squirm I said “no”.

It was a riot.

Hell, I’d been reading “the joy of sex” for like a year at that point.

Mmm, hairy armpits. 🤣
We found a copy of the Joy of Sex in a closet of a rental house we moved into. It was hilarious. The guy was so hairy, hairier than my dad, and he's an ape! I thought it was very unattractive. Now, I'm grossed out by guys who shave everything, not manscape, but those who go full bald. Adult men should have some body hair!
 
We found a copy of the Joy of Sex in a closet of a rental house we moved into. It was hilarious. The guy was so hairy, hairier than my dad, and he's an ape! I thought it was very unattractive. Now, I'm grossed out by guys who shave everything, not manscape, but those who go full bald. Adult men should have some body hair!
The naked ladies has changed too over the years.
It was full bush when I was a debutant. It’s more variations today. From totally bald to variations untill full bush.
 
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